Forceably remove child from ride?

[LisaBi]

Does anyone have any experience when children won't get off a ride? My son has Down Syndrome. I was just dreaming about my next trip (Sept. 05 IF I can get a discount code!) and remembered an experience we had several years ago.

It was the last night of our last day, and nearly our last ride. Connor refused to get off a ride (I don't even remember which one - maybe the coaster in ToonTown). I was trying to pry him loose, and the cast member said "That's OK - he can go again. It's not busy. Besides, we can't force kids with special needs to get off." We didn't go again for several years, and I haven't heard anything like that before or since. On the last few trips, we had a few situations where they let him ride again, and others where they looked very annoyed while I worked to get him off the ride, and one CM even yelled at him to get out. He is getting too big and strong for me to be able to physically remove him against his will. (Anything he really likes, he just wants to stay on and ride over and over. He doesn't understand that we at least need to get off and go back around thru the line, preferably a while later, instead of immediately.)

And on a similar thought, if I DO get him off and go back around right away, I feel guilty (we are usually using a wheelchair and/or GAC). Once, after we'd ridden Test Track twice in a short time, I pryed him off of it and told him we had to wait a while to ride again. I paid the whole time. He refused to go on anything else, see anything else, etc. while we waited. So we basically wasted an hour doing nothing except arguing. At least in MK, I can take him back and forth between Buzz and Space Mountain!

LisaB

 

[Michigan]

They will let you go again if it's not that crowded. Buzz Lightyear is always sort of crowded but when we went in Feb this year they asked if we wanted to stay on until another wheelchair came and needed the car my oldest daughter that was with me in the wheelchair car and my youngest daughter that was with their grandfather in a regular car both yelled yes so we rode it 3 times in a row.

 

[boo's mom]

Didn't happen at Disney but I work at Kings Dominion, Paramount park in Virginia. Well last weekend was my first week there and I was working a ride by myself. Well there was a few small children that did not want to get off the jeeps. Thank goodness the parents are allowed to come inside the ride area after the ride is over to retreive their child. I would have been there all day if it wasn't for the parents


I also had a kid that wanted to ride, got buckled in, then unhooked himself while I was checking the other children. The boy proceeded to unhook children to get in their jeeps. Well the mother came in and told him he needed to stop it and ride in his own jeep. He started screaming and sat down and didn't want to move so she picked him up, moved him out the way, asked him if he wanted to ride, he said yes. Then he threw a fit when she told him to get in his own vehicle so she took him off the ride. Then the next ride cycle, he was back. Thank goodness he decided to behave

 

[Selket]

Hopefully going in Sept you will encounter fewer people which will help! I wonder if the CM running the ride could suggest anything to you - perhaps explain the situation before your son gets on the ride if it is one you think he will want to repeat. Maybe they can plan to let you repeat it a few times or something such thing. Not sure if that would help or not - I guess if he is more likely to be willing to get off after a few turns on a ride that would work out.

I would think there aren't many folks doing rides at WDW with your situation. I can understand why you may feel guilty letting him ride multiple times but it seems like, for YOUR situation, that is perhaps what the GAC could work well for? I wonder if Guest Services would have any helpful suggestions for how to handle that. I think if the CM's working the rides know that they can be of some sort of assistance and it would head off any rude behaviour on their part.

 

[Schmeck]

I'd be concerned that if you let him ride one ride twice in a row, he'd expect to have that happen every time. It would just end up confusing him and getting him more agitated, wouldn't it, not knowing if he was going to get to stay on or not?

I've always thought that consistency was the best tool, especially for special needs children. I think the uncertainty makes kids nervous, or at least sets them up for failure.

Do you use picture/communication cards at all? You could set up a set that showed getting on the ride, enjoying the ride, getting off, and then going to another ride, or back in the line again, all set up in a pattern.

 

[LisaBi]

You are absolutely right about the consistency thing. My expectation with him is "one ride only." He agrees, then pulls a switch-a-roo at the end. He fully understands if I tell him "one ride on Space Mountain, then one ride on Buzz, then get ice cream, then ride SM again." He just lives so much in THIS moment, that the only thing that matters is what he is enjoying right now.

Last trip, one evening, I told him only one ride on Buzz, and if he argued at the end, he wouldn't get to ride it again the next day. Well, he argued. We didn't ride it the next day. He argued all day. We still didn't ride it. Looonnng day for me! But better behaivor the next day (getting off rides more easily).

LisaB

 

[ColoradoBelle1]

Oh Lisa,
This is such a hard sitch to deal with! I'm sure no one really gets annoyed with a special needs kid who is just so happy to be riding a ride at Disney that he can't see why he has to get off!!! But I also understand how hard it is for you to try to keep the peace and teach your son how to play fair.

Does he usually listen to 'everyone but mom?" If so, I 'd enlist the support of the CMs by saying that they need to come get him off the ride and not have it be your call. Then you can say: son, you know I'd let you ride twice in a row, but Disney says: every adult and every child can only ride once at a time. Sorry.

Thank goodness he isn't into Dumbo! I remember waiting in THAT line forever and my kid is 23!!!!!

Good luck with this...it sounds like you are a very loving mom and caring person.

 

[wide awake]

I know the feeling !!! You try for good behavior and PAY for it all day or at least for hours. Don't feel guilty...do what is best for you and DS and enjoy yourself. If this is a teaching moment and you make him get off, fine...if not, fine too...we've all been there.

 

[Schmeck]

How about making up 'tickets'? You know, like the old way at Disneyland and WDW? Have him use a ticket each time he rides. Maybe then he'll have a better understanding of how much other great stuff there is to do, how the time can be spent, etc, so he can look forward to the next thing? Maybe put a picture of each ride on the ticket? I know this will involve a lot of planning though.

I've worked with PDD, non verbal, and autistic students, and I understand the difficulty of trying to reason/explain, etc, with children who are challenged by 'normal' expectations. Trying to get a 70 lb PDD, nonverbal kindergarten student safely off a climbing structure because recess was over involved evading his mouth as he tried to bite, and his feet as he tried to kick us. It took us weeks of trying just about everything to finally come up with a solution. We moved snack time from before recess to afterwards - he was always willing to go in for snack!

I hope whatever you decide to try will work for you, and that you and your family have a magical time.

 

[SueM in MN]

How about making up 'tickets'? You know, like the old way at Disneyland and WDW? Have him use a ticket each time he rides. Maybe then he'll have a better understanding of how much other great stuff there is to do, how the time can be spent, etc, so he can look forward to the next thing? Maybe put a picture of each ride on the ticket? I know this will involve a lot of planning though.

That is a very good idea!
I have nver used tickets, but have made communication pages for my DD so she can more easily tell us what she wants. If you have word processing software or Powerpoint, you have what you need (once you find some pictures). You can find photos of the rides on websites, including
www.wdwinfo.com
www.allearsnet.com
www.mouseplanet.com (mostly Disneyland, but many of the rides are similar anyway)
I've also found some good pictures by typing the ride I'm interested in into www.google.com and then instead of just doing a regular search, click on the "images" link to look only for images. You can often find pictures or the logo for the sign, so you could use what was most appropriate for your child.

 

[debm]

Hi, LisaB. As soon as I read your post I knew you were talking about our son!! I didn't see you mention how old your son was but our son with Down syndrome is 9. He is not quite 60 pounds but I am also finding that he is getting quite big to manhandle. And my husband gets quite frustrated and we don't always see eye to eye on the discipline thing. I think it is just because I am the mom and I look at it more philosophically. Anyhow....my DH doesn't have any problem staying on a ride if the CM lets them. And with all 4 of our kids sometimes that is just such a relief for us. Most of the time though Aaron will get off and walk around, even though he is a bit reluctant. We have just recently started using the GAC and that has helped tremedously. we are leaving for our next trip this Wednesday! We are all so excited! We didn't tell Aaron right away ---we planned it short notice---usually we plan months and months in advance. And normally he stops doing anything meaningful at school weeks before we leave. All he will talk about is Mickey. So we were able to keep it a secret for a week but our other kids said it wasn't fair and we needed to tell him. Of course he has proved us wrong---he has done beautifully in school and hasn't sat in the van constantly. Problem is--everytime we get in the van to go anywhere he thinks we are leaving. And like yours he definitely lives in the moment. I hope everything works out well for you and you decide what will work best for the situation. Sounds like our kids enjoy the same rides: Buzz, SM, and Test Track. Have fun when you go!!!

 

[LisaBi]

DebM - My son is 12 and up to 95 pounds! Last summer, we went as a family for the first time in several years. DH and DS(15) didn't enjoy it so much, so I decided to take Connor back in November - just the two of us. We had a such a great time that I want to do it every year if possible! Of course, going alone adds to the challenges - like not being strong enough to make him move when he doesn't want to.

I don't mind when a CM lets him ride again - except then he expects it everytime. The GAC helps a lot - we didn't use it on POC and ended up not riding - just before we got to the loading area he decided he'd waited too long and refused to ride! At least with the GAC I can farily confidently tell him "we have to get out, but we can go get right back in line and ride again." But it gets embarrassing when you enter thru the fast past entrance AGAIN and the CM's start to remember that you were JUST there!

I know what you mean about waiting to tell him. I remember the first time we went when Connor was only 6. After we got home, for months everytime I picked up the car keys he asked "go Din-ney Wold 'gain?" Now days, about once a week he asks "Can we go to Disney World tommorrow?" as casually as if he asking if he can go out and play!

LisaB

 

[thumpersfriend]

I have a question and don't want it taken the wrong way please. I have only one grandchild and she is 2 years old and just diagnosed with autism. It has been devastaing to me and I have gone through all the emotions there are. My big dream was to take my grandchild to Disneyworld, I am crazy for it. I have trouble getting her in a car seat sometimes and she is only 35 pounds! I am wondering the up side of taking her to Disneyworld if there is a chance she will have meltdowns all the time there. I don't want it to be the most miserable experience for our family. My question is, why do you take your children there if they won't get off the rides etc? I am wondering if taking her would be a mistake when she is 4. Or, is there a really positive side to this. Do you think in the long run it is good for them? Please try to understand what I am saying. You all sound like such positive people and maybe eventually I will to. So please bear with me . Thank you.

 

[SueM in MN]

I have a question and don't want it taken the wrong way please. I have only one grandchild and she is 2 years old and just diagnosed with autism. It has been devastaing to me and I have gone through all the emotions there are. My big dream was to take my grandchild to Disneyworld, I am crazy for it. I have trouble getting her in a car seat sometimes and she is only 35 pounds! I am wondering the up side of taking her to Disneyworld if there is a chance she will have meltdowns all the time there. I don't want it to be the most miserable experience for our family. My question is, why do you take your children there if they won't get off the rides etc? I am wondering if taking her would be a mistake when she is 4. Or, is there a really positive side to this. Do you think in the long run it is good for them? Please try to understand what I am saying. You all sound like such positive people and maybe eventually I will to. So please bear with me . Thank you.

I don't think you are asking a bad question. If I was looking at myself from the "outside", I might question why we go.
My DD has a lot of obsessive compulsive type behaviors that can cause meltdowns and since she can't walk or stand, a WDW trip means a lot of lifting and work for us. If I was looking at myself from outside, I might wonder why we would put ourselves thru the hassles when it would be so much easier to just stay home (but then, it would be so much easier to not take her shopping or out at all, so if I thought like that, we would never go anywhere. LOL)
In the long run (even though it may be hard in the short run), people do see positives or they would not keep making trips to WDW.
A lot of people see positive behaviors coming out of a WDW trip. Some people have posted that they noticed increases in language or tiny changes in the ability to wait/take turns. Maybe the first trip to WDW is not the easiest, but usually each trip gets easier as you and the child know what to expect. There have been posts from people who gradually saw a child who was not able to wait in line at all be able to wait pretty patiently for something they remembered they enjoyed the last trip.
And, even if you don't go on any rides at all (that may be just too threatening for some children), there are so many things to see and experience.
Right now, you are probably still in shock about the diagnosis that your granddaughter was given and things that you planned to do might not seem possible.
I don't know if you have ever seen
this article called, "Welcome to Holland", but it has helped a lot of people see that maybe the trip thru parenthood/grandparenthood they had planned is not the one they ended up with, but it can end up to be a good trip anyway.

Good luck on your trip.
here's another website with some specific hints for people with sensitive children or children ont eh autism spectum and WDW trips.

 

[eeyoresmountainpals]

LisaBi ~ and ~ debm --- It sounds as though I could be either one of you! Our son also has Down Syndrome and has done the same thing, not just at WDW but at any place where he's having fun. LisaBi, I agree with you completely about consistency. I know what you go through as far as telling your son if he doesn't behave then he'll lose the priveledge of going on a certain ride the next day. It ends up being harder on you than on him. But in the long run that's what works and that's how he'll learn. And he will learn, it'll just take him a little longer than most kids!!!!! Our son is now 16. There is absolutely NO way that I could physically remove him from a ride any more. He's about 150 pounds and ALL muscle. (He did strength training in school this year!) It's a good thing that he has learned over the years that when his turn is over he has to get off or else he has to suffer the consequences. We still get some "attitude" from him once in a while but at least he does get off the rides by himself now. Keep doing what you're doing, even when it seems so hard on you, and you'll see the benefits.

 

[eeyoresmountainpals]

thumpersfriend - No offense taken and I definitely don't think that you shouldn't have asked your question. My son has Down Syndrome and I have always appreciated questions. I would rather someone ask a question than just stare and try to figure out their own answer to their question!

Anyway, in our situation, we have gone through all the things that the original poster goes through; our son refusing to get off rides, having to physically remove him, punishing him by not allowing him to ride again or ride the nex tday only to have it seem like we're punishing ourselves more. But we have handled each situation consistently and that is how our son has learned. We also have three other children; an older daughter and two younger sons. We have always felt that it would be unfair to hold them back from things, like a trip to WDW, because of their brother's Down Syndrome. We have all learned to handle the situations together and I feel that it has made us a stronger and closer family because of it.

All families are different and we all handle situations differently. I hope that once you get through all the emotions that you're dealing with right now that you'll find that perfect way of handling the situation that you've been dealt. I can't agree more with SueM in MN who suggested you read "Welcome to Holland." You can find it at:

http://www.nas.com/downsyn/holland.html

That helped me so much when we found out our son had Down Syndrome. I went through all of those emotions that you're going through now.

Good luck with all that you are going through!

 

[thumpersfriend]

Thank you very much for not taking anything I said the wrong way. Now I just read Welcome to Holland, still a little teary but it is very hopeful. She is in an early on program and I am busy with her 4 days a week. She still won't hold our hands to walk but we are doing this brushing that is supposed to help eventually. I will continue to read this board because I think it will be my guide through some things I really don't want to talk with my family about. I feel like I am supposed to be the strong positive one, if they only know that I am crying when no one is around. I love that little girl so much, and my saving grace is that she really shows she love me. Thanks again. Anymore websites would be great too.

 

[eeyoresmountainpals]

thumpersfriend ~ Please feel free to PM me any time you want to "talk" and don't feel like talking on the boards. As I said, I've gone through the emotions and I know it's rough. I'm now to the point that I realize how blessed we truly are and I can't imagine our lives without our "special" son!!!

 

[mlwear]

Didn't happen at Disney but I work at Kings Dominion, Paramount park in Virginia. Well last weekend was my first week there and I was working a ride by myself. Well there was a few small children that did not want to get off the jeeps. Thank goodness the parents are allowed to come inside the ride area after the ride is over to retreive their child. I would have been there all day if it wasn't for the parents


I also had a kid that wanted to ride, got buckled in, then unhooked himself while I was checking the other children. The boy proceeded to unhook children to get in their jeeps. Well the mother came in and told him he needed to stop it and ride in his own jeep. He started screaming and sat down and didn't want to move so she picked him up, moved him out the way, asked him if he wanted to ride, he said yes. Then he threw a fit when she told him to get in his own vehicle so she took him off the ride. Then the next ride cycle, he was back. Thank goodness he decided to behave

Hey, we live just a little south of Kings Dominion and my son LOVES the jeeps!
We go there quite often. I haven't been to Disney in years and never with my kids, I sure hope the guests there are more pleasant than at KD! I have seen very bad behavior from kids and parents. BUT, it actually makes me feel good to see that my children actually know how to behave and be kind to others. Our kids are special and so often they it more ways than one

 

[mlwear]

LisaBi--My son is autistic and I honestly can't say that I understand much about Down's syndrome. But, this was suggested earlier....let a CM tell him that it is time to get off the ride. For MY son this has worked like a charm. For example, DS loves the pool, but when it thunders you have to get out for 10 or 15 minutes and when their is a storm that isn't going to let up, they just close it. DS gets HYSTERICAL with me. Can't understand why he can't swim. I can pull him, talk to him until I am blue in the face, he just tantrums like you wouldn't believe. BUT, then one time I told him to go ask the lifeguard if he can swim. He did. (BTW, my son is verbal) The lifeguard told him no with a brief explanation and that was that. He echoed for quite a while what the life guard said, but obviously his words were more powerful/meaningful than mine.
Thumpersfriend, I understand how you are feeling right now. This is a very difficult period. My son is 7 and this summer will be his first trip to Disneyworld. We contemplated taking him before, but thought it would be too much for him to handle. Maybe he could have, but we waited. Most (if not all) autistic children are developmentally delayed. So, my 7 year old is more like a 4 year old in his interests and abilities. I think it is perfect timing for him to go this year. It might be wise to learn some strategies that will help your grandchild have a more enjoyable trip, which will come through early intervention/preschool. These are all things you will soon know well: social stories, picture schedules, sensory soothing strategies. Just my $.02. (Plus, for a couple of years my son thought the Disney store at the mall was Disney World . He would ask me every couple of weeks to take him to Disney World. Of course, I didn't mind the two mile drive to the mall. Honestly, it was/is a very happy and fun place for him and be what he was able to handle at the time. Hang in there.