For your reading pleasure, a funny cruisecritic review

[SanDeeKath]

I have to agree with some of what the reviewer said. I find the food on Disney really poor compared to the other cruise lines we have taken (Princess, RCCL, Carnival and Celebrity) and the buffet closes completely after 3pm! I have never been on a cruise where there is no option for buffet for dinner, especially when kids are involved. I also thing the buffet is tiny and has a very poor selection. The MDR food was either fantastic or horrible but either way very inconsistent.

I also agree that the children's place is a total free for all. Kids are running wild with nothing structured to do, or otherwise have something fun like cookie baking but there are literally 100 children all trying to do it at the same time. My 6 year old is a bit shy and takes a while to warm up. There was no way she was going to warm up to the "scene" at the kids club. There were very few counselors (I counted only 3 for the 100+ kids) although there are 2-3 more but they are manning the doors for check in, check out, which sometimes took over 10 minutes! It was a huge disappointment for us coming from other ship lines and 15+ cruises. This was our experience on the Wonder in the Spring. Other ships may be different. I can't say.

I have to say that just because you criticize a cruise ship or food or children's club doesn't mean you are a Disney hater. We LOVE Disney and own almost 1000 DVC points, spend every moment we have free at Disneyland, etc. But I the reviews on the cruise critis are appropriately harsh sometimes. I really hope Disney hears the feedback and tries to not rest on their laurels but tries to make changes in response to the reviews. Otherwise, the "magic" will eventually wear away...

 

[MTmomma]

OMG I forgot about all of that pineapple! Oh man, I cannot wait to get back on the ship!

we kept ordering pineapple from room service right along with our mickey bars!

 

[breakingd_awn]

So,
This was pretty funny. Also, I think they are talking about some of us on the boards ....

I have included the entire review but the first paragraph is hilarious.

I thought Disney was for kids - From Cruise Critic.

Wow! I had no idea that there is a counter culture of adults for whom Disney is their church. This group likes to camp out in front of the stores in sleeping bags awaiting limited edition pins and fight for T-shirts whenever they are strategically stocked in the stores. They also like to interrupt childrens programs to answer trivia questions intended for children and dress up in costumes and break out in Disney songs all the time. They treated the Characters like celebrities.

Wow. I was kind of disturbed by all of this.

We went on a family vacation with our two small children, but felt like complete outsiders by all of the obsessive adults on board without children.

The chldrens programs were pretty pathetic. The staff did not entertain the children at all and my children were really scared to go there after the first day. So this was not the relaxing vacation we were hoping for at all. Disney, do you really think you can let toddlers fend for themselves? It may be okay for 10 year olds, but you can't group 3 and 10 year olds together with minimal supervision and expect for it to go well. Pretty shocking for Disney.

The food was disgusting. I was so upset that I had to put such greasy, low quality food into my kids bellies for 7 days! Hard pancakes and waffles, greasy pizza, gross chicken fingers. Yuck! And the sodium in the food for adults was really noticable. I really did not feel well after eating this for so long. If you are health conscious, there just aren't any options for you. I was so relieved to get off the boat and find healthy food! I would pay so much extra for it too if it would just be an option!

We were bored a lot. There was hardly any live music. That was odd. The ship was eerily quiet.

Not our cup of tea I guess.

We loved our DCL vacations!!! We cant wait for the next one. However I do agree with you about the kids club. I thought they had ablsolutely no structured activities for the younger kids 3-5, they were pretty much on their own. They are too little to know whats going on so they just run around aimlessly.I wish they would do something different with the little ones. I'm kind of worried about my 3yr old being in the club on our next vacation. Last year she was in the nursery,she was potty trained so we tried the club for a couple of hours and found out it wasn't for her. We ended up putting her back in the nursery. She had no trouble in there.

 

[ppiew]

I like many will agree with parts and not with others. I find the food very much upgraded in the past year (from the WONDER to the DREAM) both for children and adults. Now my DGC eat a LOT of what would be called 'adult' food. They have not been brought up on a mac 'n cheese diet. (although many many people clamber for this stuff) They will try the adult meals in the rotational restaurants and love the wraps on the pool deck. Please don't crucify them for this! Now BOTH DGD (presently ages 13 and 9) have both HATED the kids club from day 1 and they have been on DCL the past 4 years. They are both shy and introverted so kids running helter skelter do NOT appeal to them at all. We adjust and minimize there stays as much as is possible. There are so many more positive things that I think should be focused on ie. the island CC, the separation of pools (adult, family, kids, toddlers). Despite the adversity my DGD find in the kids clubs, where do they want to go on vacation next spring???? You got it - DCL!!!! NOTHING is going to please everyone all the time/

 

[Evan&Kimberly]

I am a bit worried about the Oceaneers Club! I have a 5 yr old and I am scared out of mind knowing that he will be in there with older children, I will just have to wait and see.

 

[nunzia]

wow..this is disheartening to say the least.I won't be cruising with kids this time, but for the extra cost and the Disney brand I would expect a much better kid's club set up.

 

[glassslipper2004]

One thing I do miss on a Disney cruise is a steel band playing Caribbean music. I'm not sure why Disney can't let up on the Disney music every once in a while to play some island-y stuff on the Caribbean cruises. That said, this certainly isn't a deal breaker for us!

And yes, much of the food isn't the healthiest - but options for eating healthy are there, it is just that when presented with so many other options, it is hard to choose the steamed veggies and chicken breast. Eating out at restaurants results in eating too much salt, too, sad to say, but we do it anyway! And I can't wait to do it for our four nights on the Dream!

 

[kaseyC]

This person is what I refer to as a Mouse Hater. Sadly, I have one in my own family (my SIL), and I refuse to take her on DCL or to WDW, knowing she would make herself have a horrible time just because she hates Disney.

I wouldn't consider this person a Mouse Hater. DCL is just not a good fit for them. Just because their impressions and experiences are not positive, it does not make them any less valid. Fortunately, there are many different cruise lines and ships out there so they will hopefully find one that works for them.

 

[bonnielynn]

I have only been on 2 Disney cruises (3rd coming up) so I dont have much to compare to. I can say that our youngest was 9 when we first went and I couldn't get him out of the clubs.. on our 15 day panama city cruise I literally had to insist that he have dinner with us. He loved the club..so we never had a problem. I can understand parents wanting their children to stay together for multiple of reasons.. and I'm sure that is a main factor in Disney allowing the crossover in ages.. with that said I can understand the other side as well.. we just never had any of these problems on either cruise.

Eating out is never as "healthy" as one would like.. keeping that in mind, the food was never a disappointment for us. I agree with the buffet being closed so early.. there are times that I really dont want to get dressed and go to dinner. Although I have gone to the "casual" restaurant as well. I would love it if they had a buffet as a choice.

The ship can be quiet at times, which can be a plus.. depending what you are there for.

I think going in with no expectations and just enjoying makes for a great cruise.

I plan to go on other cruise ships now that our child is a bit older.. and hopefully, eventually I will be well versed enough to really compare..

 

[Snowecru]

Meh. Some people like it, some don't. My girls went to certain activities but didn't want to stay all the time. They loved the unhealthy food, it was a break from the vegan stuff they get at home!

The camping out for doodads is ah, a little, ah...unusual?

 

[latinqt]

Oh God. The kids club staffer to child really does bother me one on the Dream. I'm going to have to check this out for myself on our NYE cruise. Our last cruise on the magic was great for our 5 yr old GD. She was well cared for with group supervised play. Yikes:

 

[Jerseymomof2]

I am a bit worried about the Oceaneers Club! I have a 5 yr old and I am scared out of mind knowing that he will be in there with older children, I will just have to wait and see.

I'm going to have a 4 & 6 yr old and I was really hoping for some good supervision. I really want some alone time with hubby and that is why we booked this cruise. Because of the kids activities. If I think it looks unsafe I might have a hard time leaving them there. which would ruin my adult time.

Would I be able to ask that they be kept in the club part and not pernitted to go into the lab?

What is the child/CM ratio?

 

[mousejunkie98]

Honestly, the situation in the kids clubs is not the dangerous, Lord of the Flies free-for-all that people are making it out to be!!!

As I said, we were on a full cruise that the cruise director told us included over 1300 children. We went in and out of the clubs often, because our kids wanted to be in there so much that we would stop by and check on them from time to time. Not because we were worried, but because we'd be moving on to a new activity and were just checking in to see if they were still having fun, and because it was fun for us to see what they were doing.

Every single time we were there - every single time - we saw kids that were busy, engaged and having fun. Never heard a child crying. Not once. Never saw a child alone. In the Club AND the Lab, there were CMs everywhere playing with the kids. There were no groups of kids roaming around and making trouble. The CM-to-child ratio is excellent, seriously they're everywhere! There is even an unfortunate soul whose job it is to stand outside the restroom and make sure everyone is okay and washes their hands on the way out (this person also monitors the corridor between the Club and Lab).

My youngest is 4, and he's shy. It takes him a bit to warm up and get involved without his brother. By the end of his first time in there, the CMs were calling him by name. He stayed mostly in the Club, but it was so helpful for him to be able to go to the Lab (that's where his 7-year-old brother preferred to be, playing video games). Even in the Lab, CMs engaged him. One time we went in to see them, my little one was in the Lab learning to make Disney characters out of Play Doh, and another time he was having a dance party with Stitch.

No, it's not strictly structured like a school or a daycare. The kids can pick and choose their activities and not be shuttled from A to B to C, but I think that's the point - it's their vacation, too. While not strictly structured, that does not mean it's unsafe. Those CMs know what is going on at all times. They take very good care of the kids. There are no gangs of evil 10-year-olds stalking and bullying the 3-year-olds., honestly there aren't. If a child was making trouble, the CMs would take care of it, and if it kept happening I can assure you that child would not be welcome anymore.

Oh, and one more note about the "tweens" who can use the Lab if they want to, I did chat with a CM about that. She told me that almost none of them do, and the ones who do are kids who like the interaction with the adults and come only for scheduled activities that interest them. When a tween checks in, all the CMs on the floor in the Lab are aware of it and they are monitored. I saw this myself, one checked in when we were dropping off my son, and a CM walked the boy to the activity he had come to participate in (a cooking activity).

 

[bonnielynn]

Would I be able to ask that they be kept in the club part and not pernitted to go into the lab?

What is the child/CM ratio?

I can tell you that when my son was old enough to leave the clubs w/out letting me know that it freaked me out.. so I made sure that he was not allowed to leave without me being notified that he left, where he was going and returned.. I was given a pager (even though he wasn't in the age to have one) and I was always told what he was doing..

So I would say yes.. if you as a parent say they can't go to the older club, they wouldn't be allowed.

 

[Makayna]

I can tell you that when my son was old enough to leave the clubs w/out letting me know that it freaked me out.. so I made sure that he was not allowed to leave without me being notified that he left, where he was going and returned.. I was given a pager (even though he wasn't in the age to have one) and I was always told what he was doing..

So I would say yes.. if you as a parent say they can't go to the older club, they wouldn't be allowed.

I don't see how this would work. Let's say you tell CM A that you don't want Billy to go to the Lab. CM B comes on to her shift. CM A might tell CM B that Billy isn't supposed to go to the Lab, but how are they going to remember when Sally has diabetes and isn't supposed to bake cookies and Michael isn't supposed to go to the Club and Ashley can't be near any characters because it freaks her out and her parents don't want her in the Club, but instead would like her to go to the Lab, whenever characters are in there. So, Billy asks to go to the Lab. Do the CMs carry a clipboard with ALL of the various parents' requests written on it at all times?! And if so, how reliable is it that CM A wrote it on the note so that CM B knows?

I have a hard time believing that if Billy asked to go to the Lab, that that request would 100% absolutely be honored.

 

[woody73]

From Cruise Critic.

"There was hardly any live music. That was odd."​

I have to agree with this one. On other cruise lines, there is much more live music on board -- live musicians at the stage shows, live bands at the sail away and daily at the pool. Plus, multiple venues offering live music in the evenings.

Over the years, DCL has cut back on their live music offerings: no more dueling pianos, no more steel drum band, and no more live music at the sailaway. That's sad.

Woody

 

[mousejunkie98]

You have to remember that every kid in the Club and Lab is wearing a GPS tracking device, so the CMs can literally pinpoint where every kid is at every second. When we'd go pick up our kids, they'd tell us EXACTLY where they were. And yes, there are CMs monitoring those computers every second.

I had a client sail on DCL with a child who has a severe peanut allergy. His file was flagged, and he was never allowed near any kind of tree nut. Before starting to cook, the CMs check to make sure no one in that room is allergic, diabetic, whatever. They can do this because of those RFID units that every kid is wearing.

They are very, very, very careful. You cannot pick up your kids unless you are listed in the computer as authorized AND you have the password. Every child is scanned in and out.

The only place they don't have computerized monitoring is at Scuttle's Cove on Castaway Cay. There, they rely on clipboards, but they don't do the same cooking activities they do on the ship. In that case, if your child has an allergy or is diabetic, while I'm sure they have a system in place, I'd simply recommend having your child eat lunch with you and not at Scuttle's Cove.

 

[lbgraves]

Also, the kids use a "secret passageway" to get between the club and lab on the Magic and Wonder. Have not seen the Dream but why not use the same thing there? They don't ever leave the confines of the club when they do this because one end is in the lab and the other is in the club. They cannot leave the supervision without checking in/out with the CM at the desk.

 

[MinnesotaMouseketeers]

I NEVER PAY ATTENTION to reviews like this. As you can see in my signature, I have done several DCL vacations. We booked another one while on the Wonder PC cruise; It will be our fifth DCL vacation. And while I think there is room for improvements in some categories (and I put them down on the survey), we have ALWAYS HAD A OVERALL "MAGIC"AL EXPERIENCE on our vacations.

All kids are different and you have no way of knowing if they will have fun in the kids clubs until they are in it. It blows me away that because critics/parents say "my kids had no fun in the clubs" so I am sure your kids will hate it also. People start to rethink there DCL vacation. Our DS was dragged out kicking and screaming when ever we went to pick him up. He loved the staff and activities.

If you have a DCL vacation booked or are thinking of booking one and are having second thoughts after reading negative reports. GO AND EXPERIENCE IT ON YOUR OWN. You may be missing out on one of the most "Wonder"ful family vacation ever, because someone else has expectations that will never be met of have no idea how to have fun. Because by reading posts like the Cruise Critic, that person to me is going out their way to find nothing but the negatives. I can't/don't believe that there isn't something fun and positive to write about.

 

[DVC_Corrys]

I guess I should pop in and say my main reason for posting the review was the funny notes they had about the adult Disney fans.

I found it humorous.