FL Surrogate Wants To Keep Baby AND Get Child Support

[Seahunt]

On local news this evening - this is a sad story and shows that you better be really legally protected before proceeding, no matter what (see the part about the "contract":

An Oviedo couple said they're being extorted and defrauded by a surrogate mother. The couple hired a woman from Jacksonville to have their baby, but now, they said, she's refusing to give up the baby and is even asking for child support.

The Oviedo couple already has one child through a surrogate mother. In that case, everything went perfectly. This time, they tried a different surrogate and said she is trying to steal their baby.

The couple believes the baby was born last week, but they can't get any concrete answers. They are taking the issue to court as a crib sits empty and the couple waits for the baby they said their surrogate mom stole from them.

The room, decorated in Tinkerbell theme, is awaiting the arrival of the Lamintina's little girl. They were set to name her Rochelle Amber. Now they don't know if they'll ever get to hold her.

"My biggest fear is we may not be able to bring her home. That's what's so hard," said Gwyn Lamintina.

She said they had such a wonderful experience having a surrogate for their first child, TJ, that they looked forward to the process again, but she and her husband Tom said it has been awful.

"I just hope and I pray everything will work out alright," Tom said.

The surrogate mother, Stephanie Eckard, lives in Jacksonville. At her home, someone inside would only say there was no comment. Then a note was taped on the door: 'No comment. Contact my attorney Kelly Hanson.' So Eyewitness News did.

"Under the laws of the state of Florida, surrogacy is like adoption. The surrogate mom has the option to keep the baby," Hanson said.

That's something the Lamintina's attorney disputes.

"Is she asking for child support?" WFTV reporter Cynthia Demos asked Hanson.

"I'm not going to answer that," Hanson said.

"We didn't think anyone would be that low to scam someone with a baby out of money," Tom said.

The DNA test proves that there is a 99.9999 percent chance Tom is the father. The egg is from the surrogate mother. The surrogate did cash the $1,500 deposit, which the Lamintina's hope will work in their favor.

However, there is one major sticking point. The surrogate never signed the "surrogacy contract." The Lamintina's said they never checked, because they trusted her. They said they will not give up on until they have their baby girl home.

The Lamintina's said they found Eckard on a surrogacy site online. All the lawsuits have been filed in Jacksonville in the Duval County courthouse and the Lamintina's are hoping they will get their Rochelle home by the time she's one.

 

[Stucas]

all I can say is wow. I can't even begin to imagine what the family is thinking. How could this even be an option, for the surrogate to keep the baby. Its insane....its not her baby!!!!!!

 

[BelleBoo&AmisMum]

The DNA test proves that there is a 99.9999 percent chance Tom is the father. The egg is from the surrogate mother. The surrogate did cash the $1,500 deposit, which the Lamintina's hope will work in their favor.

However, there is one major sticking point. The surrogate never signed the "surrogacy contract." The Lamintina's said they never checked, because they trusted her. They said they will not give up on until they have their baby girl home.

I bolded the two parts that cause the major issue with me, they should have used donor eggs, instead they have a birth mother with a biological child and the husband is the father. They also should have made sure the contract was signed prior to the insemination.

 

[MosMom]

Even though she may have the upper hand legally, this is just so so wrong. What an evil woman.

 

[KristinBelle]

I bolded the two parts that cause the major issue with me, they should have used donor eggs, instead they have a birth mother with a biological child and the husband is the father. They also should have made sure the contract was signed prior to the insemination.

I feel bad for them but I can't believe they used the surrogates egg, that seems nuts to me.

 

[BelleBoo&AmisMum]

I feel bad for them but I can't believe they used the surrogates egg, that seems nuts to me.

Oh, I feel bad for them too, I think they may have been a little complacent since it went so well the first time. I just think they made a series of mistakes and now they're in a world of pain. The surrogate is clearly out of line but I wonder her real intentions too.

 

[Northstar]

I agree with BelleBooandAmisMom that this is not a true surrogacy... the woman who had the baby is the baby's biological mother. She may be going back on an agreement, but she isn't stealing somebody else's baby... that's her baby, too. If she tries for child support (which is not certain at all, according to the story), then the father will just have to contest custody and/or work out visitation.
It's rotten that the couple thought they were getting a baby and then ended up empty-handed, but the biological mother has a really wrenching decision, too, and maybe realized too late that she could not give up her baby. I'd rather see people going through the regular adoption process than pretending the woman who gives birth to her own flesh-and-blood baby is just a rented womb.

 

[lookingforward]

They are in for a longgggg legal battle that they may never win. I wonder why they did not have an attorney? Insemminating a women is such a big risk that I am in shock they did not cross every t and dot every i.

As for the surrogate mom...I have a little bit of sympathy for her too. Yes, she went back on her word but she may be depressed, feel alone, etc. Often noone take into account how incredibly hard it must be to part with a child that you have carried inside for nine months. Couple that with the fact that the child is half her's biologically and she may be really confused.

I hope the three of them come to terms that prevents the poor baby from being the center of a long and painful battle.

 

[MosMom]

As for the surrogate mom...I have a little bit of sympathy for her too. Yes, she went back on her word but she may be depressed, feel alone, etc.

I might feel this way if she wasn't going after child support. If you can't bear to give up the baby, that is one thing....but to take the baby AND try to get money from them is a whole different ballgame.

 

[ducklite]

I bolded the two parts that cause the major issue with me, they should have used donor eggs, instead they have a birth mother with a biological child and the husband is the father. They also should have made sure the contract was signed prior to the insemination.

That was my first thought as well. I'd like to know why donor eggs weren't used--I thought that ethically that was what doctors were supposed to do.

Even though she may have the upper hand legally, this is just so so wrong. What an evil woman.

It is wrong. I almost think that the surrogate planned this entire mess.

I might feel this way if she wasn't going after child support. If you can't bear to give up the baby, that is one thing....but to take the baby AND try to get money from them is a whole different ballgame.

THAT'S where I think she's a gold-digging witch. (not the word I really wanted to use, either.)

I think that hte doctor who inseminated her should have done his homework a little better as well.

Anne

 

[C.Ann]

Does the name "Mary Beth Whitehead" ring a bell?

 

[MushyMushy]

I forgot all about Whitehead. What ever happened with that?

 

[ducklite]

I forgot all about Whitehead. What ever happened with that?

I want to think MaryBeth got custody, it was in the news a couple years ago--the daughter wanted to live with teh other couple and is messed up, and I think MaryBeth maybe tried to commit suicide. No one won.

Anne

 

[kdibattista]

I think that hte doctor who inseminated her should have done his homework a little better as well.

It is wrong. I almost think that the surrogate planned this entire mess.

THAT'S where I think she's a gold-digging witch. (not the word I really wanted to use, either.)

I'm going to reserve judgement on any of the parties involved until more facts come out. I believe this is probably a case of a biological mother not realizing the emotional turmoil she would be faced when having to give up her child. I just don't get how she would be in for the money or why she would plan this? It doesn't sound like she got a whole lot to begin with for this ($1,500). If she wanted a baby, she could have gone to a sperm bank or had a few one night stands to accomplish the deed. If she wanted the money, she would have asked for more up front. Plus the fact that I'm sure she realizes she will now have to pay a heck of a lot more then $1,500 in legal bills so the gold digging doesn't make much sense to me. Having the biological mother change her mind is A LOT more common then people think and honestly, it's her right. Heartbreaking... yes. Illegal... no.

I would have a completely different POV if these were not her eggs, but they are. Both parties should have been better prepared and it's just a shame that the one paying the ultimate price with be the child. Hopefully, they can come to some sort of custody arrangement to allow them all to be involved in her life.

 

[chobie]

I'm going to reserve judgement on any of the parties involved until more facts come out. I believe this is probably a case of a biological mother not realizing the emotional turmoil she would be faced when having to give up her child. I just don't get how she would be in for the money or why she would plan this? It doesn't sound like she got a whole lot to begin with for this ($1,500). If she wanted a baby, she could have gone to a sperm bank or had a few one night stands to accomplish the deed. If she wanted the money, she would have asked for more up front. Plus the fact that I'm sure she realizes she will now have to pay a heck of a lot more then $1,500 in legal bills so the gold digging doesn't make much sense to me. Having the biological mother change her mind is A LOT more common then people think and honestly, it's her right. Heartbreaking... yes. Illegal... no.

I would have a completely different POV if these were not her eggs, but they are. Both parties should have been better prepared and it's just a shame that the one paying the ultimate price with be the child. Hopefully, they can come to some sort of custody arrangement to allow them all to be involved in her life.

I agree. Whereas I don't think surrogacy should be illegal, I don't like the practice.

I can't help but think that any woman who would agree to be a surrogate for a stranger has some issues. Renting out your body like that seems odd to me.

 

[MELSMICE]

all I can say is wow. I can't even begin to imagine what the family is thinking. How could this even be an option, for the surrogate to keep the baby. Its insane....its not her baby!!!!!!

Actually, it is her baby. They used her egg.

What a horrible situation. I have sympathy for all parties involved.

 

[Heidict]

First off, here is how the Marybeth Whitehead case turned out, according to Wiki:

An article in the March 28, 1999 edition of the Daily Mail on Sunday reported that Elizabeth Stern suffered from multiple sclerosis and was using a wheelchair. Mary Beth Whitehead Gould told the reporter that Elizabeth Stern was "selfish" to contract to bring a child into the world when she was ill. The article noted that Melissa called Mary Beth Whitehead Gould "Mother" and Stern "Betsy." The Sterns refused all interviews out of concern for their daughter's privacy and threatened legal action against a television news program if it used a photograph of Melissa it had obtained from Gould.[3]

When she turned 18 in March 2004, Melissa Stern formally terminated all of Mary Beth Whitehead's parental rights and formalized Elizabeth Stern's maternity through adoption proceedings. [4]

As of March 2007, Melissa was a junior at George Washington University majoring in religious studies. She hopes to become a minister and has not ruled out having children of her own one day. She said it was strange to study the Baby M case in her bioethics class at the university.[4]

"I love my family very much and am very happy to be with them," Melissa Stern told a reporter for the New Jersey Monthly, referring to the Sterns. "I'm very happy I ended up with them. I love them, they're my best friends in the whole world, and that's all I have to say about it."[4]


[edit] References

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Baby_M

In regard to the OP, their first mistake was in not having a contract signed. While it may not have avoided what did eventually happen it may very well effect the upcoming court procedings.


I feel horrible for the Lamintina's. I can't imagine the pain they are going through. I understand that the baby is half the surragote mothers and that may be part of the reason why she feels bonded to the baby and wants to keep her but the fact that she is going after child support really says alot. I makes her look like a money hungry *$%#@&^.

Unfortunalty I'm sure it will take years and years for this to work it's way through the courts. In the meantime the poor child is going to be the one who suffers and loses the most.

 

[minnieandmickeymouse]

Wow what a mess. I feel bad for the couple who were expecting to have their baby, but they shouldn't have used the surrogates eggs. I don't think it's right for the surrogate to ask for child support, that is just crazy.

 

[mickeyfan2]

I bolded the two parts that cause the major issue with me, they should have used donor eggs, instead they have a birth mother with a biological child and the husband is the father. They also should have made sure the contract was signed prior to the insemination.

ITA

The birth mother is the biological mother and thus has those rights. The contract not being signed is a big big problem. I think they will end up paying child support for the kid.

 

[Alicnwondrln]

thats sad
so shes keeping the baby and then is gonn have the nerve to ask this man for support
thats nuts she needs to give those poeple thier baby