Feeling sorry for myself vent

[Hillbeans]

I don't often come on here to vent but i'm just feeling down tonight. I have been without DH who has been traveling all over the world on business and my neighbor and other neighbors have been going out on a weekly basis for Dinners, Happy Hour, Karaoke, Line Dancing, etc. I know they probably feel I can't go since I don't have DH home but I am sure I could get a sitter for a few hours to enjoy a night out. I often have the neighborhood kids over to play (in fact some are here now) and I feel left out that I can have their kids over but am not invited out.

I guess sometimes it's a fine line between friends/neighbors. I know some people have terrible neighbor issues so this is really superficial but it'd be nice to be included. Thanks for letting me vent, it makes me feel a little better.

 

[kirbydog48]

I don't often come on here to vent but i'm just feeling down tonight. I have been without DH who has been traveling all over the world on business and my neighbor and other neighbors have been going out on a weekly basis for Dinners, Happy Hour, Karaoke, Line Dancing, etc. I know they probably feel I can't go since I don't have DH home but I am sure I could get a sitter for a few hours to enjoy a night out. I often have the neighborhood kids over to play (in fact some are here now) and I feel left out that I can have their kids over but am not invited out.

I guess sometimes it's a fine line between friends/neighbors. I know some people have terrible neighbor issues so this is really superficial but it'd be nice to be included. Thanks for letting me vent, it makes me feel a little better.

It's nice that you have neighbors that you want to be with. Is there anyone you're close enough to that you could say "Gee, I could really use a night out. Could I tag along next time you go out?" They probably assume that you would not be able to due to DH being away. Maybe do something to pamper yourself tonight...bubble bath, glass of wine, rent a movie, etc.

 

[NMAmy]

I've found being proactive is best. Be the one to plan the outing. Get a babysitter and invite the neighbors for a night out doing whatever you'd like. Once you break the ice this way, I'll bet you start getting invitations.

 

[minkydog]

I've found being proactive is best. Be the one to plan the outing. Get a babysitter and invite the neighbors for a night out doing whatever you'd like. Once you break the ice this way, I'll bet you start getting invitations.

Great idea! They probably don't have any idea how lonely you are, especially if they have never had a traveling spouse. It's nice to be invited and if I lived near you, I'd invite you for sure. Time to take the reins. You won't get invited if you don't make it happen.

 

[cybrkitn]

If you are missing your DH while he's away, here's something DH and I do when he's away on business - Skype.

We set up a time where we meet at the computer - usually it's 7 pm. DS8 will join me and we will have a video call through Skype with DH. It gives us a chance to see each other and DS can tell his father about his day at school and what-not. It's sorta like the Oreo's commercial with the father and son.

 

[Hillbeans]

Is there anyone you're close enough to that you could say "Gee, I could really use a night out. Could I tag along next time you go out?" They probably assume that you would not be able to due to DH being away. Maybe do something to pamper yourself tonight...bubble bath, glass of wine, rent a movie, etc.

Thanks! I am not sure I could invite myself out, if it's all couples maybe i'd feel out of place. I'll treat myself to a nice glass of wine

I've found being proactive is best. Be the one to plan the outing. Get a babysitter and invite the neighbors for a night out doing whatever you'd like. Once you break the ice this way, I'll bet you start getting invitations.

We often do things as neighbor couples, like once or twice a year. I guess we're just not as close as I thought.

Great idea! They probably don't have any idea how lonely you are, especially if they have never had a traveling spouse. It's nice to be invited and if I lived near you, I'd invite you for sure. Time to take the reins. You won't get invited if you don't make it happen.

Thanks.

If you are missing your DH while he's away, here's something DH and I do when he's away on business - Skype.

We set up a time where we meet at the computer - usually it's 7 pm. DS8 will join me and we will have a video call through Skype with DH. It gives us a chance to see each other and DS can tell his father about his day at school and what-not. It's sorta like the Oreo's commercial with the father and son.

Yes, we Skype often. He's coming home next Friday for 8 days before heading back out again so i'm excited to have him home. It's just lonely having him gone, and knowing all the neighbors are out having fun makes me feel like a 9 year old who didn't get invited to the party, lol.

 

[cybrkitn]

Yes, we Skype often. He's coming home next Friday for 8 days before heading back out again so i'm excited to have him home. It's just lonely having him gone, and knowing all the neighbors are out having fun makes me feel like a 9 year old who didn't get invited to the party, lol.

That's gotta be hard . I don't know if I could handle that if DH was only home for a few days before heading back out on a business trip.

 

[Acklander]

I've found being proactive is best. Be the one to plan the outing. Get a babysitter and invite the neighbors for a night out doing whatever you'd like. Once you break the ice this way, I'll bet you start getting invitations.

This! It's always hard to take the first step, but once you do it others will understand that you're game for going out and having a good time

 

[Hillbeans]

It's sorta like the Oreo's commercial with the father and son.

Yes! That commercial is my life, LOL. DH has been in China (Shanghai, Beijing, Chengdu, Quandong) and we've lived the "Goodnight, Good morning" scenario in that commercial since early June with my two boys

 

[powellrj]

While my DH doesn't travel, he is a workaholic so he is never home. Everything is for couples so I am always left out. I have also found that DD is left out of many things because many of the couples activities become family ones.

What I have done is found single people friends. I have several single friends that I do things with. At my age, most of the single friends are widows and divorced ladies, but we enjoy going out and doing things together.

 

[huey duey & luey]

some people feel weird about the couple/single thing, which I find ridiculous. My husband works late and I often have to go out without him.

What about trying to get together a girls night out?

 

[NHdisneylover]

I've found being proactive is best. Be the one to plan the outing. Get a babysitter and invite the neighbors for a night out doing whatever you'd like. Once you break the ice this way, I'll bet you start getting invitations.

THIS. They likely think you would not want to go out without your DH (some people don't). Once people start to realize you are comfortable being "single" at a couples' outing they will probably start including you

 

[WhateverLolaWants]

Have you ever heard of the website meetup.com? You can find groups of strangers with a common interest who plan public meetings/activities. It could help you get out of the house and meet people who are open to new friends.

 

[java]

Why not suggest a movie night out? In our neighborhood it is a come one and all kind of thing- most of the planning is on facebook- just a quick- going to see whatever if you want to meet - we'll be at X.

Really I was a homebody 3 years ago. Never going out. It took me making the first move. Invited a neighbor out to breakfast. Then it spirallled out from there. We even grocery shop together. I have to say "No thanks" sometimes but I make the effort to get out and about.
I'm sure they don't know you want to go. So maybe if you just say "Hey does anyone want to go see Eat, Love, Pray? it could open a whole world to you.