FE disapointment?

[Anisum]

I'm travelling with one of my friends from college soon (we're 24 and 26) and we plan on exchanging FE gifts with another cabin (there weren't enough people to set up a full one) as an adult I'm excited to make/buy things for their family, both kids and parents.

That being said, I do understand the people who only want to give to kids. This is my friend's first Disney cruise and I thought it would be special to do a FE. That being said if it was a large group of staterooms and most had kids and were doing it for kids finding separate gifts geared towards adults (if that's the way you give FE gifts) might be a pain and I would understand if they stated up front that they were only giving to kids.

As it is, I'm excited for everything/anything. I'm a big kid at heart and I will gladly play with glowsticks and eat candy or whatever with anything we get.

I do have a question (and perhaps this isn't the right place) I've heard of people giving alcohol to adults/parents which sounds great in theory but some people may not drink or drink in the presence of their children, etc. Is there a consensus on this? I wasn't planning on doing it this round but I would like to know for future reference.

 

[Bree]

@Anisum

The FE we joined for our upcoming cruise had the alcohol as a gift question and you could choose Yes/No. I really liked that. I have an occasional drink, but my DH doesn't drink at all. He would be happier with a box of M&M's or glow sticks that he could give to the kids.

 

[Anisum]

@Anisum

The FE we joined for our upcoming cruise had the alcohol as a gift question and you could choose Yes/No. I really liked that. I have an occasional drink, but my DH doesn't drink at all. He would be happier with a box of M&M's or glow sticks that he could give to the kids.

Oh, that sounds like a great way to do it.

 

[wcw57]

I'm a-gonna try one more time to be lucid. While I don''t get adults wanting all those little gifts, I think if they enjoy it, who cares? Not me. I just wonder what they DO with all that stuff, that's all.

So, to the point:

We are on this imaginary cruise: My DGDs sign up for the exchange with the proviso that there will be no expectations of gifts FROM or TO adults...where is the harm? I'm not sure if people are misreading, misconstruing, or just blind with outrage.

Anyhow, its not my rules for EVERYBODY (as some have mistakenly inferred)...never said that...never....Just my rules for myself and they are fair and without judgement. AND, once again, I started by saying that this would be understood upon signing up, even though the majority of respondents seem cloudy on this.
I don't mean to prick your bubbles....and I cannot understand the vitriol. AND I NEVER EVER told anyone not to participate because they didn't agree with me. Many of you have said just that to me.

 

[Missyrose]

I'm a-gonna try one more time to be lucid. While I don''t get adults wanting all those little gifts, I think if they enjoy it, who cares? Not me. I just wonder what they DO with all that stuff, that's all.

So, to the point:

We are on this imaginary cruise: My DGDs sign up for the exchange with the proviso that there will be no expectations of gifts FROM or TO adults...where is the harm? I'm not sure if people are misreading, misconstruing, or just blind with outrage.

Anyhow, its not my rules for EVERYBODY (as some have mistakenly inferred)...never said that...never....Just my rules for myself and they are fair and without judgement. AND, once again, I started by saying that this would be understood upon signing up, even though the majority of respondents seem cloudy on this.
I don't mean to prick your bubbles....and I cannot understand the vitriol. AND I NEVER EVER told anyone not to participate because they didn't agree with me. Many of you have said just that to me.

That part wasn't in your original explanation. You simply stated that you only gave gifts to the kids in your FE group because you made the decision to not gift the adults. That's a very different scenario than entering a kids-only FE where the clear expectation is only the kids will receive gifts.

 

[wcw57]

of course, it is implicit that I wouldn't sign up for a Fe exchange I didn't care to participate in. Never the less, I laid out the above scenario previously in different and, apparently, not easy to understand language.

IF the confusion was caused by me, I apologize.

 

[ASchwa]

I'm a-gonna try one more time to be lucid. While I don''t get adults wanting all those little gifts, I think if they enjoy it, who cares? Not me. I just wonder what they DO with all that stuff, that's all.

So, to the point:

We are on this imaginary cruise: My DGDs sign up for the exchange with the proviso that there will be no expectations of gifts FROM or TO adults...where is the harm? I'm not sure if people are misreading, misconstruing, or just blind with outrage.

Anyhow, its not my rules for EVERYBODY (as some have mistakenly inferred)...never said that...never....Just my rules for myself and they are fair and without judgement. AND, once again, I started by saying that this would be understood upon signing up, even though the majority of respondents seem cloudy on this.
I don't mean to prick your bubbles....and I cannot understand the vitriol. AND I NEVER EVER told anyone not to participate because they didn't agree with me. Many of you have said just that to me.

I will respond. You seemed to take offense with me when I responded to another poster who said she signed up for the FE and was NOT giving to adult only cabins, only those with children. You then replied to me that you would do the same thing. I then pointed out that a lot of adults without children participate in the FE and it wasn't fair that they give your cabin a gift and there was no exchange. You then accused me of making the rules and that my attitude was my way or the highway, when I said then don't sign up if you are not going to fully participate you then accused me of being the FE police and that I probably made rules on how much is spent on the gifts. You then proceeded to announce that your DGKs would be happy with penny candys being given out, I then cheerfully related the story of the penny that my sister gave to me. I have only participated once in an FE, half the cabins were adult only cabins. The only rules were that to give what you could, individually or cabin, didn't matter what you gave, preferences were taken in consideration, one cabin preferred no candy, and no spending limit. There were no schedules, but everyone who signed up participated. We all agreed afterwards that the cruise was great because of the group that we had created and most of us had a blast (we also were on the ship for 15 nights). Everyone was thankful for what they got, no one complained, and we made connections with each other. I will agree that if the rules are agreed to in the beginning then by all means do it that way, but if you sign up with a group that doesn't have any rules to that effect then be prepared to give at least a cabin gift, even if it is penny candy.

 

[wcw57]

if u insist, i will follow your mandate for the FE exchange. U have changed my opinion entirely. So sorry. I've got my mind right now.

 

[PrincessTrisha]

I'm a-gonna try one more time to be lucid. While I don''t get adults wanting all those little gifts, I think if they enjoy it, who cares? Not me. I just wonder what they DO with all that stuff, that's all.

So, to the point:

We are on this imaginary cruise: My DGDs sign up for the exchange with the proviso that there will be no expectations of gifts FROM or TO adults...where is the harm? I'm not sure if people are misreading, misconstruing, or just blind with outrage.

Anyhow, its not my rules for EVERYBODY (as some have mistakenly inferred)...never said that...never....Just my rules for myself and they are fair and without judgement. AND, once again, I started by saying that this would be understood upon signing up, even though the majority of respondents seem cloudy on this.
I don't mean to prick your bubbles....and I cannot understand the vitriol. AND I NEVER EVER told anyone not to participate because they didn't agree with me. Many of you have said just that to me.

As long as you're okay me striking your DGD's off of my FE list and me recommending to any other adult only cabins to do the same.

If out of 12 cabins on the FE list, 3 are adult only, then effectively, you're asking for only 9 cabins to participate with you. I'm okay with that as long as you're upfront.

If you give gifts to 12 cabins, you should receive gifts back from 12 cabins;
If you know you're only giving gifts to 9 cabins, you should only receive gifts back from 9 cabins.

 

[wcw57]

princess trisha: YEP! THAT is what I've been sayin all along...not sure why there is any question about that.....no gifts TO adults and none FROM adults....pretty clear all the while. as i've said, up front and equal.....
thanx

 

[lisamarie12]

Some people go totally overboard on FE. But I think that most people have reasonable expectations. I bought most of my items at Dollar Tree and Target's dollar area. We did a couple of cabin gifts (cute magnetic photo frames and mickey q-tips) and then individual gifts for the kids of a few items each. My gifts were individualized and I tried to take into account character preferences, but that was not always possible. If they liked Minnie or Frozen, that was easy. But for some of the others (boys usually), they got avengers, monsters, or Disney jr stuff, depending on their ages.

I figured that my even though my kiddo has her favorite characters (Elsa, Minnie and Princesses), she likes pretty much all toys. Hopefully the kids in my FE group feel the same way. But if they didn't, then that's their loss. I may not have spent $50 per cabin or made hand crafted items (I have no creative genes), but I did put thought into what I bought people. And its the thought that counts.

We got great gifts. Some of them nicer than what we gave and some comparable. We loved the fact that someone thought of us. As far as the sundae kits- that seems to be a popular choice of gift and I hear of people who get lots of them. We only got one actually. We ended up not using it, because it was a port day when we got it. I was planning on saving it for my birthday which was the last sea day, but we had Palo brunch so that did not happen. We took them home and will enjoy soon. Even if I had gotten 10 of them, I probably would have at least taken the toppings home.

 

[NavyBlue4Eight]

Of note, I've seen multiple people over the years who put one out and let the gifts be "magic" - from characters, or such - for their little ones and they put the gifts in them for them. This is another way to participate.

This is what we did on our first cruise last November. I brought an FE along, and stuck little things in it each day for our son to find. A little "Disney Magic" for him. He and I also walked our deck and left something small in each of the FE's we found.
We did find a few surprises in ours as well throughout the trip. For us, it was the perfect way to do something nice without all the pressure. We'll do the same thing again next year when we sail with our extended family.

 

[MakiraMarlena]

If you're not going to be happy receiving trinkets bought in bulk from Oriental Trading or bags of candy, maybe don't participate and just make things for your family.

 

[Dallas_Lady]

This thread reaffirms my decision to forgo the whole FE thing.

 

[Jrimom1]

Sorry I took so long to respond, but I want to thank @bumbershoot, @Maggie'sMom, and @MelSpees for understanding and commenting. With that being said, for the sake of my children I would try it again! I like the whole idea and I like the joy my son got when creating things for other kids.

 

[mom+3girls]

I participated in the FE 3 times, I enjoyed it. It was fun. But I'm not going to do it again. It takes a lot of time and the gift seem to have gotten way out of hand. It was more fun when it was little trinkets or small items.

 

[DnA2010]

We recently sailed on our first Disney Cruise (May 9th on Fantasy) and enjoyed the FE. The cabins were in groups of about 10ish and you could be in as many groups as liked. We were in 2. We received a nice assortment of dollar store type stuff, some home made stuff (some cute bottles to put sand in, a photo album, a lovely pillow case that we got signed, a couple of sundae kits, a root beer float kit including a small can of rootbeer), some candy (there were some fabulous carmels from Argentina - yum!) some booze for the DH and I (double yum!) and a number of "emergency" type kits with Disney cotton swabs, Tylenol, mouthwash, small sunscreen etc. The most popular item received was the Disney themed Kleenex- I think we got 14 packs- no worries, one always uses Kleenex. We were also in the last 2 groups to close (booked VGT), so maybe some of the earlier groups that had been booked a while had more home made/personalized stuff, but we just loved the whole idea and enjoyed checking for our goodies

 

[lauritagoddess]

When you gift in FEs, do you usually put your name or cabin number on your gifts? In prior FEs it never occurred to me to do this and I think only a couple of the gifts we got indicated who the gift came from. In a FE group I'm in now, there was discussion about putting your name/cabin on the gifts as if it was expected that you would. It's been several years though since I participated in one, but I was wondering if that was the norm now?

 

[PrincessShmoo]

When you gift in FEs, do you usually put your name or cabin number on your gifts? In prior FEs it never occurred to me to do this and I think only a couple of the gifts we got indicated who the gift came from. In a FE group I'm in now, there was discussion about putting your name/cabin on the gifts as if it was expected that you would. It's been several years though since I participated in one, but I was wondering if that was the norm now?

Some people put names/room number on their gifts. Others do not. Originally it was an anonymous gift exchange, but not so much now.

 

[dcassetta]

I have never put my name on my FE gifts, but maybe I should. I recall one poster saying they wanted to keep a log of who had given them what.