Family Trip - Rules for the parks?

[carol48b]

that does not work with my granddaughter. we all try but after a couple of minutes we let her up or you could be sitting there 20m minutes later and still no pee. and of course you get in line and she has to go. she was the hardest child I have ever trained with 30 plus years training kids in daycare. so it does not always work with every child

They're all different. My niece was one of those. After the first day of this happening, we made her wear "Pull Ups" under her shorts. The third day, she suddenly had no problems going when every one else did and went back into big girl panties. We weren't being mean, we just had issues getting to bathrooms as quickly as she needed. Fortunately, it all resolved itself in one day. Bless you for having to train all those kids in daycare - you have earned Sainthood!!!

 

[carol48b]

Whatever you do, do NOT force your child onto a ride he or she doesn't want to go on. We were following a couple onto the Dinosaur ride at AK and one of the 2 kids, begged, sobbed, pleaded not to go on that ride. The parents forced her and the poor thing cried and screamed the entire ride. I was surprised the CM allowed them on. She was truly frightened.

 

[carol48b]

[/QUOTE]

Now, I do have that rule for my husband

I was going to try that last trip - no commenting on the way ladies are dressed, etc. but before we left, I looked at some photos from the very first trip we took WDW (when they first opened) . And, I realized that maybe the "sights" now aren't as bad as they were then... remember "hot pants and micro mini skirts"?

We first took our kids where they were 5 & 7...I must admit, it never occurred to me to have any "rules" beyond basic good behavior & manners same as at home. Yeah, we went over what to do if they got lost and whatnot...but no, no rules specific to WDW.

 

[brockash]

Hmm I've never encountered the need for "rules".
You just know how to behave and if you get off track you'll be warned...

As for the bathroom... you have to go when you have to go and if that means we end up going after every attraction well then we do. Dictating when people are allowed to pee is weird to me.

Lol...this is one of my biggest pet peeves. I do it with my dogs too lol. If one goes out; they both do. Just like a car trip; if we stop; you better be trying to go to rhe bathroom...we're definitely not the stop at every exit type. We're more on using our time wisely. Even now, when we go with extended family; if we're stopping for a bathroom break...EVERYONE'S trying...what is the point of stopping just to hang there while 1 person goes just to stop again 15 mins later for the next person? I guess if we were wanting to tour every bathroom at Disney we might try this, but as it is none of us are interested in paying Disney prices to stop at bathrooms after each attraction. To each their own, but I think it's something that's just always been ingrained in all of us since we were kids and we raise our kids the same. Obviously if there's an emergency or someone really has to go right after we just went that's fine, life happens, but we certainly don't try to make that practice.

 

[brockash]

that does not work with my granddaughter. we all try but after a couple of minutes we let her up or you could be sitting there 20m minutes later and still no pee. and of course you get in line and she has to go. she was the hardest child I have ever trained with 30 plus years training kids in daycare. so it does not always work with every child

Have her parents talked to a Dr. about that? Seems odd and like there might be more to it. If she has to go and especially can't wait 10 mins after you've just tried to go something is off, as her bladder obviously had fluid in it. Is she planning on going to public school? What's the plan forcthe bathroom issues? I'd make sure to have her checked out before she's starts, so if she really does have a problem; they can get the appropriate paperwork to school. Poor girl...does not sound fun.

 

[brockash]

this is any time she does not say I have to go pee like say we are getting ready to leave house for awhile before we can get to bathroom with or without someone with. when out it is up to her if someone goes in with her. she has to be in control and on her schedule not ours. not looking forward to next park trip with her. if taken and she does not feel like going or saying she does not have to you are waiting for awhile and she will not go, then few minutes later she will say I have to go and you have about 5 minutes to get her to a bathroom where she may or may not want you in

Is this control thing only in relation to her using the bathroom or is it just her behavior in general?

 

[brockash]

no she can hold for hours like half a day if she wants. she is the hardest child I ever trained in all my years of training toddlers. and it is not just peeing it is everything on her schedule. like we say she marches to her own drummer doing things her way. already feeling for teacher next year as she heads to kindergarten

Ok, nevermind my last question, so she's stubborn and hard headed and so far hasn't had any natural consequences. I'm not sure if you're her primary caregiver or not, but this is something I'd try to nip in the bud asap. Sooner the better...if your not and it's her parents than there's not much you can do, but as far as the conversation of having everyone try etc., I'd say your situation with your granddaughter really has nothing to do with the rule of everyone trying when a family stops...she's just against rules in general.

 

[Betty Rohrer]

Ok, nevermind my last question, so she's stubborn and hard headed and so far hasn't had any natural consequences. I'm not sure if you're her primary caregiver or not, but this is something I'd try to nip in the bud asap. Sooner the better...if your not and it's her parents than there's not much you can do, but as far as the conversation of having everyone try etc., I'd say your situation with your granddaughter really has nothing to do with the rule of everyone trying when a family stops...she's just against rules in general.

it is a work in progress with her, us and her parents but there are so many things that she can control that makes it hard. she just uses the rules that she wants to follow to her benefit and others that she does not to make life hard. as I say she marches to her own drummer even if it does not get her what she wants which happens often as often as it causes us/parents problems

 

[Betty Rohrer]

They're all different. My niece was one of those. After the first day of this happening, we made her wear "Pull Ups" under her shorts. The third day, she suddenly had no problems going when every one else did and went back into big girl panties. We weren't being mean, we just had issues getting to bathrooms as quickly as she needed. Fortunately, it all resolved itself in one day. Bless you for having to train all those kids in daycare - you have earned Sainthood!!!

she would just go in the pull up as she did even try to keep those dry. tried that with her, had to loose the pull ups. never had a kid in daycare that hard to train. plus you would be surprised what kids will do for their teachers that they wont do for parents

 

[Blondie58]

we are hoping to make our first family trip next year, our girls will be roughly 5yrs and 8yrs. I've been to Disney a few times but never as a parent...of course I want the kids to have a magical time but think it would be helpful to have some ground rules and expectations set... does anyone have any advice or tips?
I'm thinking things like:

- everyone takes bathroom breaks TOGETHER we aren't stopping every 10 minutes to pee because you "didn't have to go" when we were just there.
- This is EVERYONES trip I'll go on Dumbo for you but you're going on Carousel of Progress for me (I'm a dork I know)

First, I am also a dork. I love Carousel of Progress. (Tip: Have the girls try to find the cat in each of the Carousel settings.) Having said the latter: Parents are wise to "teach" expectations for this or any other vacation or situation out of the normal day to day routine. You are not only teaching manners and compromise, you are teaching life skills and "working" in a group etc. I would discuss the different rides and attractions before going so expectations are set. (Look at rides/attractions on the web. Do a 30 day countdown and look at one each day right after dinner or before bedtime stories.) You could even make a checklist to use at each park of what you will do as a five and eight year old can read. (We actually have a scaffold of a schedule when we travel with other adults so all get to see and do as much of their "wants" as possible.) Front-load your expectations and stick to them. Sometimes as parents we are inconvenienced in teachable moments when it comes to behavioral expectations but then reoccurances diminish when you stick to what you say. Plan your work and work your plan and you will have an enjoyable vacation without drama. (You may be able to tell I was a school principal for 17 years. With anywhere from 550 to 650 students - setting expectations for behavior, respect, compromise etc etc etc is paramount. I am also a parent and can attest this approach will work if parents are consistent. Observe families at WDW. Some argue and fight and have melt downs all day long. How much fun is that?? Others have a wonderful time and everyone goes with the plan. And, yes, with little ones there has to be some flexibility on plans but on behavior and manners etc. - no flexiblity.) I think following ground rules will make your time very magical. Have fun!!!

 

[johnsbelt]

I give my kids general guidelines like “you can have one souvenir under x amount this trip” or “you can spend x amount per day on snacks.” I think this helps manage expectations, avoid meltdowns and entitlement issues, and also teaches them to budget.

It’s also been helpful to have everyone decide their 1-2 must-do rides and make those our priority as a family.

We have the same thing with the list of must do and really like to do.

One thing I strongly suggest to all parents of younger kids is to take a break in the early afternoon. The meltdowns will be substantially less in intensity and some are eliminated all together. Now with the limited hours in the parks that might not be such a big deal but it was when the parks where open 12-14 hours a day (our daughter is 30 with kids of her own).

And finally, go at the kids' pace. Don't try to "hurry" to things to get more done. Sometimes the things you bump into or something happens (like meeting a character at a location you didn't expect) turn out to be something they will always remember. (We were there with the kids (adults) and grands for Thanksgiving in 2019. Bumped into Peter Pan in the lobby of Bay Lake our first night there! No one else was around and Peter talked to our grand daughter Anna for 15 minutes and then she walked with him over to the Contemporary. Had almost 30 minutes alone with him! She just lights up when it's talked about.)

Hope this helps,
John

 

[bex7583]

We never had any rules .just the " if you get lost plan"

Enjoy your trip.

 

[dez1978]

Seems absolutely ridiculous to me.
Its one thing to say hey let's try to go to the bathroom now so we don't have to hop out of line but its another to tell someone when to go and when to not go.

Makes perfect sense to me in a situation like this. Not on a daily basis, certainly. But when you could be in line for an hour, it is perfectly reasonable to tell your young child we are going to try to go to the bathroom now while we are near one to avoid the “ I have to pee!” 5 mins from the front of the line.

 

[tjmw2727]

I didn't have special WDW rules but we did have expectations for behavior that were generally the same as at home. One thing that I will stress is don't threaten if you aren't prepared to follow through! I can't tell you the number of times I heard "if you don't stop xx we are going home" well even kids know your probably not going home!

Watch some planning and or ride videos and find out what each child is interested in - we did a list of rides, attractions and shows for each kid in order of importance. Don't underestimate the resort pools and play grounds - kids that age need to move and play so we tried to find time every day for this.

Make sure everyone stayed hydrated, fed and understood - we stopped for snack breaks, bathroom breaks when necessary. We also made sure everyone knew that they would ride their list of must do's eventually. Then just have fun - ride the rides, see the shows and if a child is truly misbehaving give the warning (forfeit a ride, 10 minutes on a bench, no ice cream treat ... whatever works for your family) and follow through

Plan your meals, for us it was the larger main meal as a late lunch sit down as we all needed the break from the stimulus and the heat, breakfast was in the room and dinner was quick serve. Look at the menus and plan ahead as to what will work best for your family.

If your trip is longer there may be days when you just have to abandon plans, try to alternate late night shows (when they return) with early morning starts. and be willing to head back to the resort for a swim in the afternoon if things aren't going as planned.

Souvenir's work differently with every family but when the kids were young I had a good idea of what they would actually enjoy vs what looked fun at the moment so I would generally steer them to things I knew would be lasting fun for them. When they got a bit older we moved to a $ amount each day that they could carry over/save for the next and then eventually to a $ amount per trip.

Sorry this is long but if your still with me - but warn the 8yo that unless it's a 3 seater she won't be able to ride with the 5yo.
Same with the 5yo they must be seated with a "responsible party" over 14

5 and 8 are such great ages for the WDW parks - research rider swap for the rides the 5yo can't ride, realize your not going to see/do it all so just focus on each day.

Enjoy!

 

[DisneyMama811]

When I was younger my parents ALWAYS had us take mid-day breaks. We would get to the park at opening, then go back to the resort for a nap or to just to chill from about noon-3, and then back to the park for the evening. We've all probably seen that family who clearly dragged their kids along all day and before the fireworks the kids are miserable and the parents are miserable trying to handle their overly tired children. Don't be that family, they never look like they're having a good time. Take breaks/naps.

I think this will be our plan. we are not in financial position that Disney can we a frequent thing for us, it might end up being the only time in their childhood we can go so I'm tempted to cram it full of as much magic as possible into every minute of the day but realistically I know that's more likely to end it epic meltdowns rather than memories

 

[JFox]

No climbing on the rocks or landscaping.
Do not sit on the stanchion chains, belts or ropes. Or swing them.
No sitting on the lean rail.

 

[JFox]

Not a set of rules but we also have a system for QS meals. I have 4 kidlets so everyone has a job. Our plan will be modified due to current conditions.

1. We all decide that we want before reaching the ordering station
2. Adults order/pay and stay to pick up trays
3. All 4 kids are sent to secure a table large enough for 6 with enough chairs. They are prepared to scout for tables and ask for empty chairs from neighboring tables. The 2 youngest stay at the table
4. The 2 oldest gather napkins, forks and condiments and then deliver them to the table. They only take what we need.
5. The oldest kid returns to the adults to inform us of the table location and help with trays if needed.
6. After eating, every cleans up and we take trash.

 

[Kitty & Covs Covs]

This is such a great thread! I only have one 7 year old, but since she started going to the parks at 18 months the "rules" have been whatever will get her to keep an adult pace--which sounds terrible as a I write it but she actually thrives on (being an only child.) Usually it's just her and me traveling, but this time with much older cousins as well. So--it's:

1) Definitely use the restroom whenever anyone else is using the restroom;
2) Snack constantly at all possible moments so she's never hangry;
3) Concede that she will be tired and that everyone is tired and sleep is not the point of the trip;
4) Absolutely no whining if there's no solution to be had

Her attitude is totally dependent on my attitude, so I do try to make sure we are doing things that we both like most of the time. I can give in to riding Little Mermaid 45 times in a row if it makes her happy, knowing that she'll then later rock a better attitude until park close. I involve her in the planning as much as possible so she knows what to expect (on our next trip we will get to the hotel around 1am and have a 6:20am wake up call and then will be going until park close at 10pm, for example) and can fortify herself against a super long day. On number 4, for example, if she's whining and has a proposal for what to do instead I try really hard to take her seriously and make accommodations.

Oh--and I think kids feed off novelty even when they're overstimulated, so if I sense she's getting tired or overwhelmed we park hop somewhere else. Sometimes just the brief break on the bus or whatever and then a brand new park revives her. Maybe a rule for adults is not to be too attached to a plan!

But--one child is sooo much easier than more than one, because she doesn't have anyone to feed off of. I feel like one child derails and then they all start to derail.

You guys are all amazing for showing your children the magic of Disney!

 

[Lumpy1106]

Oh, I thought of another "rule" we instituted while on a cruise that has carried over. When we first got on the boat (Disney Wonder to Alaska) there was a "bon voyage" party. My two kids (8 and 10) were moping in some deck chairs, certain they were going to be bored. We'd never been on a cruise but I knew there was going to be a lot to do, so I set a rule right then and there; you could not say "I don't want to", you could only say "I would rather", and then we'd do that, no matter what it was. It worked PERFECTLY on the ship! There was always multiple activities going on, not to mention shuffle board, ping pong, etc. We even went swimming in the freezing rain (yes, parents included). We had a blast but it could have gone so much differently if the kids had kept moping around.

So that's the rule; no, "I don't want to", it's "I would rather". It's a trip saver!

 

[Kitty & Covs Covs]

Oh, I thought of another "rule" we instituted while on a cruise that has carried over. When we first got on the boat (Disney Wonder to Alaska) there was a "bon voyage" party. My two kids (8 and 10) were moping in some deck chairs, certain they were going to be bored. We'd never been on a cruise but I knew there was going to be a lot to do, so I set a rule right then and there; you could not say "I don't want to", you could only say "I would rather", and then we'd do that, no matter what it was. It worked PERFECTLY on the ship! There was always multiple activities going on, not to mention shuffle board, ping pong, etc. We even went swimming in the freezing rain (yes, parents included). We had a blast but it could have gone so much differently if the kids had kept moping around.

So that's the rule; no, "I don't want to", it's "I would rather". It's a trip saver!

Yup, that’s what I was saying about not complaining with no suggestion of what to do instead. As soon as they’re old enough to understand and offer an alternative, it’s a game changer if you’re willing to go along with what they say. Disney is unique in that most of the time it’s a fine suggestion—unlike some trips where going to Chuck E. Cheese when you’re at the beach is a real bummer.