Family is mad that I don't want a 40th Birthday party

[castleview]

I really don't want one. So instead of a party, DH gets me an I-Pad which I'm loving. I'm an avid reader who often travels with a bag of books, so it's perfect for me. And I'm learning all the apps and they're fun.

But according to my parents and in-laws, I'm a materialistic brat who has no regard for her family. Whatever. In the meantime, if anyone has some good I-pad info, let me know!

 

[PebblesMK]

I really don't want one. So instead of a party, DH gets me an I-Pad which I'm loving. I'm an avid reader who often travels with a bag of books, so it's perfect for me. And I'm learning all the apps and they're fun.

But according to my parents and in-laws, I'm a materialistic brat who has no regard for her family. Whatever. In the meantime, if anyone has some good I-pad info, let me know!

I feel your pain. My mom has been asking me what I want to do for my birthday...a small party, dinner with everybody, baseball game....and I keep saying no. I'd prefer the day to pass quietly. I don't need to be reminded that while all my siblings have somebody in their lives, and my child brings friends everywhere, I'm pretty much all alone. But it's okay. It's your birthay, tell your family that you and your ipad have formed a new bond and you want to spend your day with it! Hahah. If they keep pushing, offer to do dinner and that's it. I hope you enjoy your day (whenever it is)!

 

[ols386]

I don't think it makes you a materialistic brat, for wanting an ipod rather than a birthday party. It's your birthday, not your parents or your in-laws.

 

[All American]

Nothing wrong with not wanting a big party. Enjoy your gift. A guy at my husband's office brought one in, and now my husband has offered to buy "me" one for Mother's Day.

 

[jen0610]

I really don't want one. So instead of a party, DH gets me an I-Pad which I'm loving. I'm an avid reader who often travels with a bag of books, so it's perfect for me. And I'm learning all the apps and they're fun.

But according to my parents and in-laws, I'm a materialistic brat who has no regard for her family. Whatever. In the meantime, if anyone has some good I-pad info, let me know!

Tell them that if THEY would like to HOST a birthday party for you, with all the trimmings, that you would be happy to attend.

10 to 1, they'll both shut up, as soon as they have to pony up the money to throw a "proper" Lordy, Lordy look who's turning Forty party.

 

[dawn1620]

I really don't like birthday celebrations for my birthday- to me it's just another day so I see no reason to do anything big. Get me a card and I'm good. Now DH and DD are a different story...we celebrate kind of big for DH and big for hers. My family is the no party just send a card with a check kind of family..we all dislike birthdays.

But my MIL is like this - she does not understand why I would not want a big family affair..I just don't, that's about it.

Don't worry about it...the way I look at it is that it's your day and you spend it however you please.

Happy B'day BTW.

 

[hrh_disney_queen]

I think you made the right choice, and if it labels you with "materialistic brat", you should wear it proudly.

Let's see....quiet evening at home with new IPad, vs. loud party with everyone teasing you about being old, and getting every black wrapped gag gift out there, wishing you were home watching TV-and NO IPad.

I think the choice is obvious.

 

[hereyago]

Did they not intend on giving you materialistic things themselves as in the form on gifts? then they want to call you materialistic?
You are better than I ,because by 40, well actually earlier then that, I told people they can bite me if I didn't do what they think I should do. Let alone by 40 we are all grown and we dont live to appease our family.


Happy Birthday!!!!!!!!

 

[Sgt Mickey]

What a horrible person you sound like.

My dh wants to get me one of those sony readers but I would rather have the ipad I am intrestead to know how you like it.

 

[Mkrop]

This happened to me last summer when I turned 40. My mom got on my case. Why dont I want one? Umm I dont like them. I want a simple day of doing nothing (my bday was on a Sat) We did end up at the Phillies game. I loved it and people thought I was weird for wanting to go there. I couldnt win.

Then my Dbro got on my case only to find out that he thought if I did not have a 40th then he might not have a 30th and he wanted the big party. Our birthdays are a week apart. Once he found out he could still have his, he left me alone.

 

[castleview]

What a horrible person you sound like.

My dh wants to get me one of those sony readers but I would rather have the ipad I am intrestead to know how you like it.

LOVE IT!!!!! And I've only had it a few days...and I'm not a tech junkie. I've got my books, my amazing calendar, internet, email, IPOD, games...I could go on.

Thanks for the support everyone! I've got no qualms turning 40 (I think ). DH and kids are wonderful - just don't need a party. Maybe I'm frugal even though I've got the Ipad. Keep in mind, I lost my diamond a few years ago and haven't replaced it because I can't justify that kind of money when I've got a house, kids who will one day go to college, car payments, etc.

 

[kinntj]

Well, I turn 40 today and I'm getting an I pod and a Kindle, so I'm materialistic too. You and I can have an I'm turning 40 and don't want a party, but give me tech toys day! Enjoy your Ipad!!!

Happy Birthday!

 

[disykat]

The only reason I can possibly see to call you materialistic for not entertaining them on your birthday is if they are angry they didn't get a free meal.

Honestly, there is no way not having a party makes you materialistic. Are people who don't have big weddings materialistic too? That argument simply doesn't make sense to me!

If they want a party, they can throw one. Surely you throwing a party is not their only way to have a family gathering!

 

[JennMouse32]

so your parents and in laws dont care what you want then? its all about them??

 

[Micca]

If you don't want a party they can't make you have one. That's one of the benefits of turning 40 Happy Birthday (jealous of your iPad)

 

[Metsfan520]

I turn 50 next year. I think my nieces (ages 7 & 11) want to throw me a party because they keep asking me what I want to do. I'm almost tempted to let them try to throw me a party--who knows what they'd come up with?

OP, good for you! It's your birthday, do what you want.

 

[iwrbnd]

I don't like to be the center of attention so I don't want a party either. I don't think that makes me a materialistic brat, either!

 

[disney1990]

I really don't want one. So instead of a party, DH gets me an I-Pad which I'm loving. I'm an avid reader who often travels with a bag of books, so it's perfect for me. And I'm learning all the apps and they're fun.

But according to my parents and in-laws, I'm a materialistic brat who has no regard for her family. Whatever. In the meantime, if anyone has some good I-pad info, let me know!

I totally understand your feelings. I told my DH before my 50th that there was to be NO PARTY. I said that if I walked in on a surprise party, then I would turn around and walk back out.

Then I decided that maybe there was too much temptation to try and do it anyway, so I planned to celebrate my birthday at Disney World. Can't have a party for me, if I'm not here.

 

[Ephany]

Ooh, I'd much rather have an Ipad than a party. You definitely made the right choise.

DH bought me a Dsi XL for my birthday last week (he considered an Ipad but I already have an Itouch and a Kindle so he thought the DS was a better bet). With my luck I'd have to clean up after the party and there'd be all kinds of family drama. At least with a new gadget you can have days or weeks of fun discovering all the neat tricks and you don't have to feed a bunch of people.

 

[kristilew]

Then I decided that maybe there was too much temptation to try and do it anyway, so I planned to celebrate my birthday at Disney World. Can't have a party for me, if I'm not here.

That's the way to do it. I turned 40 with Mickey last year and it was GREAT! Just DH, DD and myself, and a whole day of exactly what I wanted to do at WDW.

My parents couldn't understand, either. They always throw huge parties for themselves on big bdays. I've never wanted to celebrate myself like that. I think maybe it's a generational thing.