Facebook, the new Christmas newsletter

[Conservative Hippie]

Well, maybe if you loved your children as much as she loves hers you would understand.

I have come to learn that I do not love my kids, my husband, or God because I refuse to share stupid junk.

There is one mom who posts what she is cooking for dinner every night...not as a blog kind of thing, but as in "I'm so awesome because I'm such a great and caring wife and cook!"

And it's never just chicken parmesan with salad and bread, it's "antibiotic and hormone-free free-range chicken with homemade sauce from the tomatoes and herbs in my garden, handmade pasta made from free-range eggs, salad from my organic pesticide-free garden, and bread made from 5 grains I ground myself." Well whoop-dee-doo.

 

[hlg22]

I'm a big fan of moderation. I don't care about the political posts - I'd rather people actually have an opinion on something important, even if I disagree. I am not going to argue with someone who clearly has the opposite political leanings; if they are annoying/frequent enough I will just block their posts from my news feed. I like seeing vacation photos, and I don't mind braggy posts, funny kid stories, food photos, etc. as long as they're not non-stop. One of my best friends started running a few months ago and she posts these braggy workout posts multiple times a day, every. single. day. I work out too and I think it's great that she's getting exercise, but do I need to know that she ran exactly 2.07 miles (and see the route), or that she's at the yoga studio, and see the chart she posted documenting all of her workouts every day for the entire month? No I do not. But she's a longtime friend, so I ignore the chronic FB oversharing and don't block her.

The Facebook thing that annoys me the absolute most is when people try and use it to sell you things. I use FB to stay connected with friends, not be hit up to buy Scentsy/Avoderm/Beachbody/Pampered Chef. So irritating.

 

[TheAviator]

I know a couple of women who post things that creep me out because I know the REAL story. As an adult, I found out they had been raped for years by their father. He was never outed and never punished. He died a few years ago, his secret still safe. But a very few of us know the truth. The women swore us to secrecy, as it's a small town and their children might be tormented if the truth got out.

They post things like, "I had the best daddy and miss him so much. If you were lucky enough to have a special father, forward this." WTH?!?!?!?! I can see ignoring his existence or dancing on his grave, but they make out like he was Father of the Year every year.

Even if you factor out the rapes, (and that's quite some task) he was one of the crappiest fathers ever. He was mean, rude, abusive and selfish and those were his good points. Every time I see one of those "my darling daddy" posts, I damn near go nuts. Why do that?

Wow that is soooooo sad, they are probably coping with it in that manner, by basically fooling themselves into believing the fantasy that they had a good dad, when they had an evil monster for a dad. That's a little different I think compared to bragging about other things that aren't true or are exaggerated.

 

[ceemys]

I use FB to keep in contact with my close friends and family. I don't use it to make new friends. I am one of those people who update about my kids or silly posts about me. If someone doesn't want to read it they can skip it. I have friends and family who do the same thing. I do have people who are very drama heavy, but I just ignore their post.

 

[krcit]

Wow that is soooooo sad, they are probably coping with it in that manner, by basically fooling themselves into believing the fantasy that they had a good dad, when they had an evil monster for a dad. That's a little different I think compared to bragging about other things that aren't true or are exaggerated.

Yes I agree. I think they have created a 'fantasy' dad in a way. Very sad. I know someone on FB who is constantly posting about how amazing her husband is..thing is, he beats her. It's really really sad. I think she is trying to convince herself.

 

[mamacatnv]

And it's never just chicken parmesan with salad and bread, it's "antibiotic and hormone-free free-range chicken with homemade sauce from the tomatoes and herbs in my garden, handmade pasta made from free-range eggs, salad from my organic pesticide-free garden, and bread made from 5 grains I ground myself." Well whoop-dee-doo.

I have a friend who is very vocal, politically active, loud and proud of everything him and whom recently decided to adopt daily yoga and a raw diet lifestyle.

OH MY GAWD, his status updates are insane but they have become a daily source of amusement. I spend a few minutes every day looking for bacon recipes to share with him bwahahahaha

 

[jrmasm]

I will admit to probably annoying a few of my FB friends.

My boyfriend and I are constantly tagging each other in mushy posts. I try not to too much, but I'm happy and don't care who knows. We reconnected on facebook after going to high school together.

I am turning into the annoying person on facebook that I don't like, but I can't stop...

But why do you do that? Don't you have email, phone, texts? Don't you see each other? Honestly, I don't get it.

 

[fortwildernessishome]

My son is graduating from college in 3 days, I have no doubt I have annoyed the heck out of my FB friends shouting it from the rooftops but hey, I don't care. I am beyond proud of my kid and if my friends don't like it they don't have to read it.

Yes, in some ways its the new Christmas letter, just not as long and wordy and honestly, who really cares, read it, don't read it, comment, don't comment, like or don't like. That is the beauty of FB.

We moved 2000 miles a year ago, the beauty of all the FB posts and brags is that I don't feel left out of all of my friends lives. I say brag away, doesn't bug me in the least. I know many of their kids and have their whole lives, I am proud of their accomplishments. I love hearing what my friends are up to including the surprise trips to Rome and the boring daily walk.

I could have written this post!!!

I too LOVE hearing what my friends/family are up to, I don't care if its the 5th cruise of the year, or their kid hits homeruns at every baseball game, I love it!!

I think the problem is, not so much the bragging/sharing, but that the people who complain on posts like this, have "friends" that are not really their friends!

I only have about 70 friends on facebook and they are all truly my friends and people that I care about. I look forward each day to go on Facebook and see what these people are up to. I know some people don't like to see multiple photos from various vacations, now I love that!

I say brag away, I want to hear it when its coming from people that I care about!!!

 

[kimblebee]

But why do you do that? Don't you have email, phone, texts? Don't you see each other? Honestly, I don't get it.

Yes, we have phone and email and texts and we see each other often but if someone posts a picture or a quote and it reminds me of him, I tag him in it.

I am a grown woman and really try to limit how much I do it because I don't want to look silly and sappy. I am really happy though in this relationship and don't spend too much time worrying how I come across. I will say though that I try to limit it to 1 a day as to not choke everyones page with my sappiness.

 

[BadgerGirl84]

My husband and I have a lot of blessings thus far in life, but we both make an effort not to brag about them on Facebook. For example, we went on a long trip to Europe last year. We didn't say a peep about it on Facebook and posted a short album of photos from the trip about a month after we got back for anyone that was interested--that was it.

I've been mostly mum about my pregnancy--no ultrasound pics, no baby bump pics, etc. on Facebook too because I know I am friends with people who have had fertility issues...plus it's just not my personality to boast.

That said, I'd much rather see a positive post by someone on Facebook on any topic than those depressing/ambiguous/down-in-the-dumps/poor-me/attention-seeking posts. i.e. "Why does this always happen to me??"

I also can't stand the people who have to post a picture/poster/pinterest thing every day about how much they love their child. Yah, we know.

I realized I loved posting pictures of my two dogs--they are French Bulldogs and very cute with a lot of personality. Instead of bugging everyone on my Facebook with the pics, I created their own Facebook page (Minnie and Eve...you can find them on there if you want) so people who actually like to see pictures of them can see them if they want.

One statement that my DH says all the time is "nothing is as good as or as bad as it seems"...and that really sums up what I think about the people who brag a lot on there.

 

[*JoGo*]

I have a close family member going through a divorce. Rather than unfriend each other, they antagonize each other on fb.

One posts all the great things they are doing when they don't have the kids... The other then posts how they are having such a great time with the kids and love them so much etc etc. Back and forth, back and forth.

UNFRIEND each other!

 

[EMom]

Yes I agree. I think they have created a 'fantasy' dad in a way. Very sad. I know someone on FB who is constantly posting about how amazing her husband is..thing is, he beats her. It's really really sad. I think she is trying to convince herself.

Intellectually, I know that this I exactly what they are doing. However....emotionally, it still makes me crazy to see the posts about his amazing parenting attributes.

 

[Hrhpd]

My son is graduating from college in 3 days, I have no doubt I have annoyed the heck out of my FB friends shouting it from the rooftops but hey, I don't care. I am beyond proud of my kid and if my friends don't like it they don't have to read it.

Yes, in some ways its the new Christmas letter, just not as long and wordy and honestly, who really cares, read it, don't read it, comment, don't comment, like or don't like. That is the beauty of FB.

We moved 2000 miles a year ago, the beauty of all the FB posts and brags is that I don't feel left out of all of my friends lives. I say brag away, doesn't bug me in the least. I know many of their kids and have their whole lives, I am proud of their accomplishments. I love hearing what my friends are up to including the surprise trips to Rome and the boring daily walk.

+1
Doesn't bother me the least. Love to see parents proud of their kid. I couldn't possibly want to rain on their parade.

Love to hear and see pictures of vacations.

Very easy to scroll over if I am not interested.

AND...I know where the button is to 'remove from newsfeed' if anybody starts getting really obnoxious.

Personally, I think those that get annoyed are secretly jealous that their Johnny isn't taking diffyq's in 1st grade

PS...I rarely post about my family, just enjoy reading others.

 

[StephMK]

I have a friend who is very vocal, politically active, loud and proud of everything him and whom recently decided to adopt daily yoga and a raw diet lifestyle.

OH MY GAWD, his status updates are insane but they have become a daily source of amusement. I spend a few minutes every day looking for bacon recipes to share with him bwahahahaha

My SIL is very into yoga, spiritual serenity, raw foods, etc. DH & I laught on her posts and that is the only reason I keep her on there. She bugs the $*#( outta me with her holi-than-thou attitude & posts. It is so tempting to post some stuff in response but I keep my mouth shut. She has used certain quotes to be passive-aggressive towards other family and she went off on someone else by assuming something. She's not all calm and serene as she tries to appear - hypocrite.

I could have written this post!!!

I too LOVE hearing what my friends/family are up to, I don't care if its the 5th cruise of the year, or their kid hits homeruns at every baseball game, I love it!!

I think the problem is, not so much the bragging/sharing, but that the people who complain on posts like this, have "friends" that are not really their friends!

I only have about 70 friends on facebook and they are all truly my friends and people that I care about. I look forward each day to go on Facebook and see what these people are up to. I know some people don't like to see multiple photos from various vacations, now I love that!

I say brag away, I want to hear it when its coming from people that I care about!!!

I do too! We don't live anywhere near most family & friends so I love hearing what's going on with everyone. I don't get all the bragging complaints - when can you share good news and when does it cross that line? I know an obvious brag but it seems some get upset when anything good gets posted. I only post the good stuff, the rest is too depressing or irrelevant.

 

[lynxstch]

One of my biggest pet peeves about Facebook. But then again, I don't like Christmas letters either.

ITA

Good post Donna!

 

[powellrj]

I have to admit I love fb. I have loved all the prom and graduation pictures that people have been posting lately. I love pictures of your kids and family. I even like the dinner pictures. I feel connected to people that I am far away from because of FB. I have a friend who is in WDW right now and I love seeing the pictures she is putting up everynight of her grandkids.

I have enjoyed reconnecting with HS friends and distant relatives with FB.

 

[EMom]

I know someone who posts what they are making for dinner all the time, along with their food photos. Another person, who knows the "cook/baker" but never actually sees them, said something to my sibling and I about how cook/baker must be quite the gourmet. Sibling and I because we know cook/baker is godawful in the kitchen. Notoriously bad. The other person was like, "Why are you laughing so hard?" So we had to tell her that the pictures may look good and the description may sound nice, but after a dinner at cook/baker's house, you WILL be hitting up the drive through on the way home because you will still be hungry.

However, on FB, the image is of Martha Stewart instead of Queen of Inedibles. You can be whatever you want to be on FB.

Someday, I will be a statuesque supermodel.

 

[Tinijocaro]

There is one mom who posts what she is cooking for dinner every night...not as a blog kind of thing, but as in "I'm so awesome because I'm such a great and caring wife and cook!"

Even worse is when they post what hey made and then write "Yum!" Or "Yummy" after it.

Also, I want to die whenever I se "So Proud...".

 

[moon]

How about the cryptic post?

Those posts that are just a or :'( or "I knew this would happen". Someone bites and asks, "what happened?" but they never reply.

Why do they do that?

 

[mamacatnv]

I could have written this post!!!

I too LOVE hearing what my friends/family are up to, I don't care if its the 5th cruise of the year, or their kid hits homeruns at every baseball game, I love it!!

I think the problem is, not so much the bragging/sharing, but that the people who complain on posts like this, have "friends" that are not really their friends!

I only have about 70 friends on facebook and they are all truly my friends and people that I care about. I look forward each day to go on Facebook and see what these people are up to. I know some people don't like to see multiple photos from various vacations, now I love that!

I say brag away, I want to hear it when its coming from people that I care about!!!

Same here, limited friends list. I love it all, it helps me feel connected

How about the cryptic post?

Those posts that are just a or :'( or "I knew this would happen". Someone bites and asks, "what happened?" but they never reply.

Why do they do that?

My favorite response "vaguebook much?"

My SIL is very into yoga, spiritual serenity, raw foods, etc. DH & I laught on her posts and that is the only reason I keep her on there. She bugs the $*#( outta me with her holi-than-thou attitude & posts. It is so tempting to post some stuff in response but I keep my mouth shut. She has used certain quotes to be passive-aggressive towards other family and she went off on someone else by assuming something. She's not all calm and serene as she tries to appear - hypocrite.



I do too! We don't live anywhere near most family & friends so I love hearing what's going on with everyone. I don't get all the bragging complaints - when can you share good news and when does it cross that line? I know an obvious brag but it seems some get upset when anything good gets posted. I only post the good stuff, the rest is too depressing or irrelevant.

You SIL sounds just like my friend, I'll argue with some of his "emotional" tirades once in awhile when I am bored, other than that, its all about bacon and then I smile and wave