Engagement Party - gift?

ilovesugar

Mouseketeer
Joined
Mar 6, 2010
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310
I have an engagement party to go to this weekend. This is the first one I have attened so I am wondering what, if anything, I bring for a gift.
 
Yes, you bring a gift. In my area it is typical to bring something for the couple. When I worked in retail (Bloomingdale's) people often purchased vases for engagement parties.

Bridal showers were for linens and table service.

Finally wedding gifts are cash.

If you don't know what to bring...cash is always the safest and easiest.
 
I HATE engagement parties- they are just a major gift grab. Around here the invites to the engagement party usually come with registry info in them so I just pick something off there and try to keep it under 35.00!
For one wedding you are already getting hit up for a bridal shower gift and a wedding gift...now add engagement parties and you have a minimum of 3 gifts for one wedding! Of course if you are invited to the bachlorette party you can add yet another gift in the mix LOL.
 
I HATE engagement parties- they are just a major gift grab. Around here the invites to the engagement party usually come with registry info in them so I just pick something off there and try to keep it under 35.00!
For one wedding you are already getting hit up for a bridal shower gift and a wedding gift...now add engagement parties and you have a minimum of 3 gifts for one wedding! Of course if you are invited to the bachlorette party you can add yet another gift in the mix LOL.

Yeah, this is the first one that I have ever atteneded so I was kind of confused. I am happy they are engaged, but a party? There was no registry information since they just got engaged about a month ago.
 

I'd just bring them a bottle of wine. Not sure if that's PC or not but I really hate having to bring gifts for 3 different events. :sad2:
 
I'm throwing an engagement party for my niece this Saturday. There was no registry in the invitation and gifts are not expected ~ only one person even asked me and I told them not to bring one. This is a party to celebrate their engagement, not a "gift grab".

OP, you can check with your host/hostess to see if a gift is necessary...you may very well find that it is not. I hope you enjoy the party and that the future bride and groom are surrounded by people who love and support them.
 
Engagement parties are not traditionally considered gift giving occasions, according to etiquette experts. The whole purpose of the party is to celebrate (or in some cases, to announce) the couple's engagement. If you do wish to take a gift, I would recommend something along the lines of a bottle of wine for the couple to share or something like that.
 
I would either give $50 or a gift certificate to a restaurant, movies or Home Depot/Target ect. If I didn't know them well maybe a vase or a Christmas Ornament with the year on it to mark the occasion.

Personally, I don't get why parties and giving gifts rub so many people the wrong way :confused3. It' a part of life & of being social which means sometimes we give and sometimes we get..like a great big pyramid scheme that ends up working out to everyone's benefit. Why all the hullabaloo:confused:
 
I would either give $50 or a gift certificate to a restaurant, movies or Home Depot/Target ect. If I didn't know them well maybe a vase or a Christmas Ornament with the year on it to mark the occasion.

Personally, I don't get why parties and giving gifts rub so many people the wrong way :confused3. It' a part of life & of being social which means sometimes we give and sometimes we get..like a great big pyramid scheme that ends up working out to everyone's benefit. Why all the hullabaloo:confused:

I don't see it as a gift grab, I just don't want to show up without something if it is proper to bring a gift.
 
Of the engagement parties I have been to I did not bring a gift, just a bottle of wine. It was more of a cocktail party to celebrate and toast the newly engaged couple.

Putting in registry info for an engagement party is tacky.
 
I don't see it as a gift grab, I just don't want to show up without something if it is proper to bring a gift.

Not directed at you OP, just making an observation about the sentiment on the DIS in general and some posts I've read over time. People always seem to get so stirred up about gifts, it confuses me.

I'm with you, I wouldn't want to show up empty handed when people are paying my way for a party either:goodvibes Have a nice time
 
We had an engagement party and we did not expect any gifts. Some people just brought a nice card with their congrats, some brought wine, or flowers. A few gave us gift cards or a small gift (we got a pretty wind chime and a cake cutting set to use at our wedding), and some people brought nothing which was perfectly fine.

For us it was a chance for the two families to get to know each other better and for our bridal party to all meet. We also had our pastor there so that he could meet everyone involved in the wedding before the big day.
 
You shouldn't feel obligated to bring a gift. When we had ours this past spring, it was just a time to celebrate the news and to hang out and be together. NO GIFTS. In fact, it would have been really awkward had that happened.
 
I'm with you, I wouldn't want to show up empty handed when people are paying my way for a party either:goodvibes Have a nice time

I think bringing a hostess gift to a party is always a good idea. But the engagement parties I've been to haven't been thrown by the couple themselves - in fact I've never known a couple to throw one for themselves. So bringing a hostess gift would be entirely separate from bringing a gift to the guests of honor. While bringing a hostess gift is always appropriate, bringing an engagement party gift to the couple isn't necessary or traditional.
 
Yes, you should bring a gift for the couple. Something small for their new home if they are young couple just starting out. A bottle of wine would be an appropriate gift for an older couple, but not for one just starting out.

FTR, I never go to any party empty-handed. Even for a dinner or barbecue at someone's house, I show up with food and/or beverages.
 
I threw a small engagement party (less than 30 ppl) for my sister, and she received small token gifts like wine with wine glasses, a subscription to a bridal magazine, chip/dip platters, etc.

It's defintely wasn't like a shower with big gifts, just little things. I wasn't going to have the couple even "open the gifts" in front of everyone, of anything like that, but since every guest had brought something, they were all like "when are we doing presents???" so they ended up opening them in front of everyone.

My SIL's engagement party was after she had already registered, and it was like a shower. Big gifts, etc. I love my SIL to death, but I thought the party was a little tacky b/c she had been engaged for 2 years, and then had the engagement party only a few months before the shower. She's not a gift grabber type person though, so I don't think she realized that since she was already registered, people would think they had to bring big gifts.

Generally, I think engagement parties are a nice way for the 2 families to get to meet each other, etc. It's also nice for a few friends to come as well. I don't think they should be as big as a shower, and that couples should not register before the party.
 


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