Elderly Mom with health issues

[dizneefan13]

My 80 yr old mom has just been diagnosed with IBS. She doesn't think it will affect her on our vacation, but I'm not so sure. She uses a scooter (her own) for mobility.
I am wondering, if we get in a line and she "has to go", will she be able to get out of line with the scooter, like in a hurry? I think this new dx is going to limit her ability to ride very much. I don't want to say that to her until I know whether or not she will be trapped in line if she needs to vacate suddenly.

 

[Lilsia]

She probably won't be able to maneuver out of the line with the scooter with any kind of speed, if at all. Most of the queues are pretty narrow. Everyone behind you would have to put themselves against the rail, if they are physically able to. And what about the ECVs behind you? They will have nowhere to go to get out of the way. Backing out of the line, even when mobile, is hard. The thing about IBS is you just don't know when it will hit. You might, might be able to get a DAS, which would put you in the FP line. But even then, it would be difficult in an ECV. I think this sounds very stressful for an 80 year old. I know my grandmother has bathroom issues and does not travel far from home because of the hassle for her. Long car trips are even out of the question now.

 

[dizneefan13]

Thanks, Lilsia. Believe it or not, it is stressing ME out lots more than her. I think maybe she's in denial about what might happen if she has to go while in line. This is tough because she adores Disney and is so looking forward to the trip. I'm researching IBS trying to see if there are things that might keep her not having to worry about not using the bathroom for as long as a queue and ride would take. I thought of adult diapers, but yeah........no.

 

[Elle23]

Perhaps not planning rides for a while after meals will help.

It would help to know any trigger foods as well and for her to avoid them as much as possible during the trip.

She might want to talk to her doctor and explain the situation and see if there is anything they can recommend. Imodium may help if things get bad.

 

[Bete]

I would make sure to use facilities ahead of time before going in a long ride line. Also, I would do the same after a ride. Make more frequent restroom stops and it may prevent an accident. Definitely use the restrooms after eating.

I think the adult diaper idea is a good safe guard. It would be worse without one. Carry a bag with a change of clothes, just in case.

 

[DisneyOma]

What would be the plan if she needed to go while on the attraction?

 

[Selket]

IBS is so different for different people (some is predominantly constipation, some diarrhea - some both, etc). Some people seem to have a more consistent issue while for others it "flares up" over days or weeks and calms down. Perhaps you've already done this, but sit down and get some idea of what it's like for her. I have a similar condition, and I know if I'm having a flare up and so I can plan around it such that'd I'd be unlikely to place myself in a spot where I can't get to the restroom. I use a scooter at WDW because of my knees and I cannot imagine trying to get out of a line with it). I try to not ride things I can't get a FP for however - or if the wait time is really short. After my first 3 fast passes, I do the "refresh" method and find a FP for the next available thing and usually do that - or keep trying for something else. But this really is a condition where what's it's like for one person can be very different for another. I know if I'm having a flare up and it doesn't just come out of the blue for me but it may be different for her. If that's the case she could take some precautions with a Depends type product and bring a change of clothing and go to first aid to use a room there to freshen up.

Always best to plan ahead with fast passes for the things she'd want to do the most - and perhaps the time of day might matter for her as well (as in perhaps most of her issues tend to be in the morning for example or after she eats, etc.). Of course you can also talk to guest services as well if you find things difficult and see how they can help you. I hope you have a great trip!

**editing to add that you may want to plan ahead for where to eat if food is a trigger. Sit down restaurants are the most flexible for being able to have the chef make something that won't have fat or sauces or garlic or onion or dairy or whatever might trigger her symptoms.

 

[arminnie]

I do not have IBS, but I had serious "issues" after having my gallbladder removed 20 years ago. I did a lot of research. TBH I never had an accident in line - but I was prepared in case that did happen.

A person who may have a problem reaching a bathroom in time should be prepared for what could happen. Use under garments for fecal incontinence not urinary incontinence. Bring a change of clothes, wet wipes., etc. I would not attempt long lines. There is so much to do at Disney besides the popular attractions.

 

[DisneyOma]

I do not have IBS, but I had serious "issues" after having my gallbladder removed 20 years ago. I did a lot of research. TBH I never had an accident in line - but I was prepared in case that did happen.

A person who may have a problem reaching a bathroom in time should be prepared for what could happen. Use under garments for fecal incontinence not urinary incontinence. Bring a change of clothes, wet wipes., etc. I would not attempt long lines. There is so much to do at Disney besides the popular attractions.

Me too! Never had an accident, but came close a couple of times. For me, a trigger is dairy, especially when it is hot out. So, Mickey Bars have to wait until the end of the day!

 

[geek+nerd]

You might want to have her talk to a dietician and her doctor about following a low FODMAP diet. It is initially very restrictive but you add back in little by little to help figure out your triggers.

I was on it for four years for stomach issues that weren’t IBS, but this diet was designed for IBS. Monash University in Australia has a wonderful app that is well worth the cost.

I visited Disney 8 times during those 4 years and chefs were very accommodating.

 

[lanejudy]

With or without DAS she should plan for what “might” happen no matter how careful she’s been with eating and restroom breaks. It would be very embarrassing for her if she was on a ride and simply couldn’t get to a restroom suddenly. I recommend tossing a change of clothing in a bag “just in case” as well as some protective undergarments.

Enjoy your vacation

 

[dizneefan13]

Thanks, everyone. I know we aren't going to be standing in any lines longer than 20 - 30 minutes. Maybe she would give it a try, but I would be way too stressed out. I hope we can time things so that eating and riding have some time between them, but that's hard to do at Disney! But gotta do what ya gotta do!
I'm not sure she will wear depends or the like, but maybe. I will definitely have a change of clothes for her.
Oh the things we go through to be in the Parks! I just want to enjoy every minute with as little stress as possible, and this sure puts a new layer to my plans and enjoyment.

Oh the other thing I should say is she will only do part of a day with us. When she gets tired, one of us will take her back to the resort. So that's something.

 

[Pea-n-Me]

Wearing an adult diaper would give you all peace of mind, for if the worst happened, either in line or on a ride.

 

[dizneefan13]

I know that and you know that. Now just to get her to do it. We haven't talked about this a lot yet. As I said, she is sort of in denial about what this new dx means in relation to not having immediate access to a bathroom. If she's had accidents, she hasn't told me. That's how she is.

I guess this is what you would call role reversal. I know young kids poop their pants while in line.

 

[arminnie]

Me too! Never had an accident, but came close a couple of times. For me, a trigger is dairy, especially when it is hot out. So, Mickey Bars have to wait until the end of the day!

Just a few months after I had my gallbladder removed I was at DisneyLand. I had cafe au lait at Ralph Brennan's Jazz Kitchen. Not really that much milk - but enough to be dangerous. I found the bathroom in the lobby of the Grand Calfornian and spent the rest of the morning going back and forth between the bathroom and the lobby. I swear I must have made 10 trips (or more). I'm sure the CMs there wondered about me. No way I could make it back to my room.

That was almost 20 years ago so nothing that bad these days.

 

[dizneefan13]

At least you avoided disaster!

 

[Pea-n-Me]

I know that and you know that. Now just to get her to do it. We haven't talked about this a lot yet. As I said, she is sort of in denial about what this new dx means in relation to not having immediate access to a bathroom. If she's had accidents, she hasn't told me. That's how she is.

I didn’t mean to be trite. I am living it with my own mother who is fiercely independent, aversive to many suggestions that can help her, and has recently had her first couple of visits to the parks as a newly debilitated person. Even as a nurse I wouldn’t have really thought of them for her knowing how she is. But someone gave her one in rehab and surprisingly it gave her peace of mind when she was worried about accidents in the setting of a UTI. I bought some to have on hand and now if we’re going somewhere that accidents (due to mobility issues) could be a problem, she’ll gladly put one on. I was trying to be brief (no pun intended) but that’s the back story. If you discuss it with your mother and have some on hand to show her they are basically like underwear, she might agree to try them and then you can all rest assured. That was what I was trying to say. They do also make padded underwear but they do not contain accidents, especially #2, as much as a Depends would.

 

[dizneefan13]

Pea-n-Me, I did not think you were trite at all! Sorry if that's how my post sounded. I really do appreciate any and all advice I get here.
She has had the disposable underwear before, I forget why, it was a few years ago. I will get some of the more "heavy duty" ones and take them along, as well as pack her a change.
I know I am more stressed about this than she is. Probably because I am the one having to deal with it, trying to make sure it doesn't happen and also if it does.
She is very appreciative that we take her along, so that makes it easier for me to deal with the rest of it.

 

[mamabunny]

@dizneefan13 my Mom had toileting issues due to stroke related dementia.

Whenever traveling, we would set up "bathroom kits" that I would create - one per gallon zip-lock bag. It would have a fresh pair of briefs, a pair of nitrile* gloves, and a small supply of wipes in a sandwich size zip-lock bag. We would also include a fresh, clean damp washcloth folded in a separate sandwich size ziplock bag. Because Mom sometimes got emotional during toileting (side effect of her strokes) I always popped in another sandwich bag with a few tissues folded up.

In two separate 2-gallon zip-lock bags I would put one pair each of the soft knit pants she preferred to wear in case we needed a wardrobe change. As the day progressed, I would keep/consolidate any "extras" that we didn't use, and place soiled briefs, wipes, etc. into a ziplock to dispose of. Soiled washclothes went back into a ziplock bag for laundry. By packing everything "flat" in ziploc bags and squishing all the air out, it makes it super easy at Security/Bag check as well; they can see all the contents of every bag, and so won't have to go rooting around through everything.

*we only carry nitrile gloves so we don't accidentally expose someone with a Latex allergy to a trigger.

You may find that you pack your "kits" a bit differently. Regardless, having everything at hand that you might need will give you peace of mind. I speak from experience

 

[Pea-n-Me]

Pea-n-Me, I did not think you were trite at all! Sorry if that's how my post sounded. I really do appreciate any and all advice I get here.
She has had the disposable underwear before, I forget why, it was a few years ago. I will get some of the more "heavy duty" ones and take them along, as well as pack her a change.
I know I am more stressed about this than she is. Probably because I am the one having to deal with it, trying to make sure it doesn't happen and also if it does.
She is very appreciative that we take her along, so that makes it easier for me to deal with the rest of it.

I understand! It’s fun but it can be a lot of work and anxiety for caregivers, too! Since she’s been to Disney before she knows how long and intricate some of those line queues can be. (My mother had no clue!) I’d just go over potential scenarios w her and say how tricky it could be for both of you if there was a sudden need to go. She might not be able to make it to a bathroom in time, realistically. I am not sure when your trip is but she might also work on developing a “bowel regimen” where she, say, tries to have regular bowel movements every morning so that she can try to keep up with the same routines while you’re on your trip. (PM me if you want more ideas about that, I’m sure our fellow posters will thank us, lol.)