eating with your child

It is not allowed at our school. In fact I don't know any school here that does allow it. I would not be happy with random parents/relatives showing up to have lunch at school. I don't know who these people are and it would be difficult for the school to monitor it. Security is very tight here and you cannot go into the school just to walk around etc. I like it that way.

I also think that once in a very blue moon it might be a nice surpise (like less than once a year) I do not think that parents should be up there having lunch with their kids. School is their space and time. I volunteer like crazy so I am up at school quite often but it is not to intrude on their time with their friends. I also could not imagine having lunch with a high schooler once a week. I would quit school if my Mom ever tried that.
 
I really don't get not allowing Subway, McD's, etc. because other kids might be jealous. Can't kids be jealous of anything? My kid's turkey sandwich? Cookies? It's a cruel world!:rotfl2:
 

I don't mean this to sound snippy or anything...but you do realize that most, if not ALL, of the people who say they eat lunch with their child at school have to check in with the office first, right?

I don't think people are saying they just show up and head to the cafeteria.

I have 2 children still in elementary school - one in 1st and one in 5th. I can eat lunch with them, but I have to go to the office first, check in, get a visitor badge, and then meet them in the cafeteria. And I can't just go wandering around the school.

My office is a good 20 minutes from my children's school, so I rarely eat lunch with them, but I do on occasion. They love it.


Oh....and HI KARI!! :yay:

Ok, I just was posting our school's situation which requires fingerprinting and a background check to be a class parent, help at a class trip or party, work at the book fair or holiday sale or mother's day plant sale, etc. Stopping at the office and getting a visitor's badge before going to the cafeteria wouldn't meet those requirements. Since I read the thread I do know other schools do things differently. I was just posting my experience.

I do think it's nice that some schools allow it. Especially the younger kids must really enjoy it! :) I am kind of surprised that people don't seem to mind...considering all the reactions to strangers I have seen on the dis. ;)
 
Ok, I just was posting our school's situation which requires fingerprinting and a background check to be a class parent, help at a class trip or party, work at the book fair or holiday sale or mother's day plant sale, etc. Stopping at the office and getting a visitor's badge before going to the cafeteria wouldn't meet those requirements. Since I read the thread I do know other schools do things differently. I was just posting my experience.

I do think it's nice that some schools allow it. Especially the younger kids must really enjoy it! :) I am kind of surprised that people don't seem to mind...considering all the reactions to strangers I have seen on the dis. ;)

I think it would almost be impossible for a adult to be alone with a child.
When I was at my daughter schiool today. There was a teacher assigned to each table and a teacher at the door.
 
The get an hour for lunch, in elementary school, we get 22 mins.

Lunch is from 11:22-12:23, and that includes recess.
They eat for however long it takes and then they go outside(or play in the classroom if the weather is bad). There's no set time, some classes are done and outside by 11:40, some don't get out until closer to 12.

We have half day K, so that is the in between time for the am and pm sessions. Morning K ends at 11:22 and afternoon starts at 12:23.
 
I really don't get not allowing Subway, McD's, etc. because other kids might be jealous. Can't kids be jealous of anything? My kid's turkey sandwich? Cookies? It's a cruel world!:rotfl2:

For giggles and kicks, I asked my kids last night about the jealosy aspect of me coming into school. (now to be fair it was 8 years ago for DD and about 5 for DS) They said that no one was jealous. Lunch at their school was more communal I guess and sharing among friends was very common. I would never have told them they couldn't share. And they stated that some of their favorite treats were very healthy snacks some of the kids brought in like hummus and pita. Did those kids want them, absolutely not! They traded for something sweet and fattening. Maybe times have really changed but I wholeheartedly believe that the kids my children went to school with were extremely intelligent with their bartering skills and abilities to not get overly jealous. I said it before and I will say it again, I really feel sorry for the kids and parents today. You really are missing out on some great times with them...

Guess now wouldn't be the best time to tell you twice a year I signed them out of school to see a real cool movie that just opened up. But it wasn't all bad, I brought them back after the movie.;)
 
For giggles and kicks, I asked my kids last night about the jealosy aspect of me coming into school. (now to be fair it was 8 years ago for DD and about 5 for DS) They said that no one was jealous. Lunch at their school was more communal I guess and sharing among friends was very common. I would never have told them they couldn't share. And they stated that some of their favorite treats were very healthy snacks some of the kids brought in like hummus and pita. Did those kids want them, absolutely not! They traded for something sweet and fattening. Maybe times have really changed but I wholeheartedly believe that the kids my children went to school with were extremely intelligent with their bartering skills and abilities to not get overly jealous. I said it before and I will say it again, I really feel sorry for the kids and parents today. You really are missing out on some great times with them...

Guess now wouldn't be the best time to tell you twice a year I signed them out of school to see a real cool movie that just opened up. But it wasn't all bad, I brought them back after the movie.;)

No arguments from me. Brace yourself...I've taken them out of school to go to WDW!!!:rotfl2:
 
Guess now wouldn't be the best time to tell you twice a year I signed them out of school to see a real cool movie that just opened up. But it wasn't all bad, I brought them back after the movie.;)

LOL, last school year my husband was home from work and we decided to go take the kids to a 3:00 movie, which meant we had to sign them out at 2:45.

It was the end of June, school was almost over for the year, they were doing nothing in class except cleaning. We thought it would be fun, a little surprise since that is not something I've ever done before, plus it had been raining for weeks it felt like, so juist a little something to cheer them.

Went to the office and they called the classrooms to have the kids pack up and come down--my daughter(3rd grade) was pretty pysched. My son(1st grade) was horrified! We said Hey we're going to the movies, let's go! he was like What?! That's CUTTING!!! I'm not cutting school!! Forget it, I'm not going.:rotfl:
He is so not a goody goody, it was so out of character for him. I finally convinced him that it was okay with his teacher, the principal and his parents so it was fine.
 
I eat with him a couple times a year when I am volunteering at the school for the book fair or Santa's Workshop or whatever. I think it should be a special thing and not a regular thing. Kids need to learn to be their own little people and function in the lunch room on their own.

I do not share the opinion that eating luch w/ your child at school regularly (meaning every other week or even every week) effects his ability to learn to function on his own in the lunch room; that has not been my experience, nor that of other parents I have known.
 
I must say though that bringing in Subway and even a healthy choice from McDonalds was better than what the school served. It was a small private school, but the lunches were extremely unhealthy. My kids did not buy at the school and my Mc'Ds was their treat. I actually feel sorry for little ones and parents now. It was a very nice treat being with them and giving them a little special something.

In our case, the school walks the walk-the quality of food is excellent, the kids can always pick a salad with/without meat, lots of fresh veggies, no crazy milk with a ton of additives. It's consistent-no garbage food in the cafeteria. The teachers voted to remove the soda machine from their breakroom as part of a "Biggest Loser" school challenge. One of my kid's teachers said they about lost their minds after the first week of no Coke...

Our school cafeteria is also putting this rule into place, because apparently there are some parents that are very rude when eating in school with their kids!

One day when I was eating with my Kinder. daughter, there was a lady eating with her daughter a few tables over. SHE BROUGHT McDonalds (no biggie...)she got a big mac and fries...BUT she ALSO BROUGHT A LARGE SHAKE!!!! I was ready to go ask her how mean she was trying to be!?!?!? All the other kids around her were just staring at the shake. I felt bad. All these kids have to eat school food and she brings a shake bigger than their heads!

There's this this one family from India that comes to eat with their son at school. When they come, they bring a whole tables worth of food all in these special containers. It always smells good- but people question if that should be allowed- because this mom sets up an entire table with dishes, cups and bowls- then dishes everyone of her kids up (she brings 3 more that aren't school age yet) and then her son that's in school comes to sit with them.

I don't think it's wrong of a parent to bring 'outside' food in for lunch- I've done it myself (still respecting the fact that I'll be around kids and I don't want anyone to feel bad)...but when they come and set up the entire table- I (and many others) think that's not a good thing. Especially when the lunch room is so cramped for space as it is already! The principal asked her if it's a 'special traditional thing' to do- she said 'no' so I believe this will not be happening past this year!

I can see it now, a ban on foods that smell good :rotfl:.

or anyplace else you could be alone with other peoples children without close supervision.

I would not be happy with random parents/relatives showing up to have lunch at school. I don't know who these people are and it would be difficult for the school to monitor it. Security is very tight here and you cannot go into the school just to walk around etc. I like it that way.


We have to check in on an automated system (monitored by the lady at the front desk who I swear knows every parent!) with our driver's license, and then wear the sticker that pops out with our name and image on it and where our destination is. There are too many darn kids in that school to ever be "alone" with any of them :).

Everyone needs to do what works for them, but I have a different theory. I DO care how often other parents do things and keep myself in check to provide "normal" support for my child. Since I am involved in PTSA and band boosters, I might be there more than the average parent but I work hard to make sure I am not more visable than the average parent. I basically ask my child permission every time I'm going to be visible at their school. Otherwise I stick to things where I'm not seen by students.

I feel the same way-school is my kid's turf. They have a delicate balance of where they are on the social totem pole there. I'm not going to upset it by embarrassing them, so I'll usually say, do you want me to come in for xyz? Sometimes it's yes, sometimes it's no. I respect that, and they appreciate me respecting them. I also try not to look like a goof when I show up. :rotfl2:

I eat with him a couple times a year when I am volunteering at the school for the book fair or Santa's Workshop or whatever. I think it should be a special thing and not a regular thing. Kids need to learn to be their own little people and function in the lunch room on their own.

I completely do not agree, though, with the parent bringing in McDonald's, Subway or anything else like that. It's just not fair to the other kids. If you want your child to have McDonald's or Subway for lunch, come get them and take them out.

For some parents its a regular thing if their kid needs it, for some it's a special thing. I don't judge how often others want to come in.

I do not agree with the idea that bringing in outside food is not "fair". I agree with not bringing in outside food that's unhealthy, but a turkey sub from Subway on whole grain bread is tasty and healthy. That's like saying the school should mandate what I can send the kids in with in their lunchboxes (ok, they do, but beyond no crap, I mean).

I sent one kid in with hot spaghetti and meatballs that I had made in the crockpot over the weekend and she said everyone was drooling and saying how hungry it made them. I don't see where that's a problem. Or the garlic bread that went in the box with it. The next day she got PB&J, and some other kid had something cool. It's no big deal, kids are not so fragile they can't take someone else having a treasure trove in their lunch box every now and then...

OP here. I went today. She loved it she was happy to show me off. LOL

Yay! Did you get a headache? I do, those kids are loud.
 
They were kinda of loud but they have a huge traffic light. If the light stays green then they can chat. If it's gets Yellow they are warned to calm down and talk quieter. If it's goes to Red it quiet time for the rest of the meal
 
Twice a month I take dd10 and ds7 out for lunch. Usually Pizza Hut or Subway,etc. They don't love the school food enough for me to eat at lunch with them:). I like doing it, they have lunch at different times so I take them different days w/ the 4 yr. old in tow. When it's warm out we will take something to the park - can't wait till spring:lovestruc:lovestruc!
 
I do not share the opinion that eating luch w/ your child at school regularly (meaning every other week or even every week) effects his ability to learn to function on his own in the lunch room; that has not been my experience, nor that of other parents I have known.

Neither do I. My DGD loves it when one of us has lunch with her and has told us her friend do as well. In this school system parents are welcomed and as long as they follow the procedure to enter the school it seems to work well.
 
It is not allowed at our school. In fact I don't know any school here that does allow it. I would not be happy with random parents/relatives showing up to have lunch at school. I don't know who these people are and it would be difficult for the school to monitor it. Security is very tight here and you cannot go into the school just to walk around etc. I like it that way.

.

I totally agree with you!

I think it would almost be impossible for a adult to be alone with a child.
When I was at my daughter schiool today. There was a teacher assigned to each table and a teacher at the door.

That would depend on your school--there is no way they have teachers in the lunchroom here- that is not their job. When the kids go to lunch and recess that is the teachers lunch hour to go out and get lunch or whatever..they have 2 lunch aides in the lunchroom to monitor 6 classes of children at a time.
 
My mom never came to lunch with me, nor did she ever with any of my siblings. Plenty of other moms did though with their sack of mcdonalds or whatever. Mainly we were interested in what toy came with the happy meal!

And no, there were no teachers in the lunch room. We had lunch room monitors, and they would dismiss us out to recess.
 
Well, my nieces's school here in NY doesn't allow it, but my nephews & niece's school in VA does. And it is one of the fun things I do with them once a year. I go to the office, sign in, let them know I am staying for 2 lunch periods, walk down the hall & wait in the cafeteria for whoever has the earlier lunch. Teachers walk the kids into the cafeteria, but they don't stay. There are a bunch of aides who help the kids, etc. There is no way I could take them out of that cafeteria without the aides noticing it. They know the kids. In fact, last year when I didn't see my niece right away, one of the aides came over & asked me who I was looking for. I told her the name, she pointed her out.

I love being able to see the kids. I don't bring in a special lunch, sometimes I'll bring something fresh that their mom made for them. But I get to sit at the table with them, meet their friends, talk about all sorts of things with the kids. One year, I had a conversation with my nephew's friend who had just gone to Disney World. In fact, this reminds me: I haven't made plans for this year's visit yet. It's the last year I can have lunch with Jake, he's off to middle school next year......
 
I've never heard of this before. Really, on regular basis?


I can see on a special occasion once or twice a year. The rest seems like helicopter parenting to me.l
 
I am in school full time, so I don't go eat with my kids (but I do have the option...at least with my 1st grader, I wouldn't do that to my 5th grader ;)). She always tells me which mom has come to lunch and what they had (McD's, Subway). She's 6 and she's fine with it.
 





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