Early potty training and issues with #2

[amylynne01]

I am totally for PTing early (and am now wishing I did it earlier). However, how do your 18 month olds actually get on the toilet without assistance? My 3.5 can barely get on it - she had been using a stool for a long time.

 

[GinnyEmma]

Actually yes that is what potty training is. You are teaching your child to use their muscles to hold their waste until they get to a bowel. The problem is that most parents don't want to take the time early on because someone told them it is pointless or a hassle. We allow or kids to pollute the earth with an extra 2 years worth of diapers simply because we are lazy IMHO.

Lol, you cannot train a dog or a kid or any other being to do something they are not physiologically ready to do. So, how many children have you potty trained?

 

[Nanu57v]

My youngest started waking up dry and peeing on the potty (I would just put her there when she woke up dry before she learned signing) at 10 months. I was surprised!

My oldest poop trained 6 months before pee training...I think she didn't like how it felt. Mostly I'd suggest bribery. The oldest was big on M&Ms. Good luck!

 

[princessmom29]

Lol, you cannot train a dog or a kid or any other being to do something they are not physiologically ready to do. So, how many children have you potty trained?

An 18 month old who can tell you "I'm going poop" and go hide in a corner to do it, or wait on a diaper IS physiologically ready. Most kids CAN do that by 18 months to 2, at least in my experience. BTW, I have potty trained al least 100 kids. Most of them were ready well before thier parents agreed to start.

 

[Meshell2002]

An 18 month old who can tell you "I'm going poop" and go hide in a corner to do it, or wait on a diaper IS physiologically ready. Most kids CAN do that by 18 months to 2, at least in my experience. BTW, I have potty trained al least 100 kids. Most of them were ready well before thier parents agreed to start.

OK so with all this experience.....did you have any advice for the OP? She asked for spedific ideas....I don't think it was her intention to turn this into a "flame all parents who don't complete training by 2 thread"....help the woman out...even though that's where it is headed....lets get back on topic, please

 

[princessmom29]

OK so with all this experience.....did you have any advice for the OP? She asked for spedific ideas....I don't think it was her intention to turn this into a "flame all parents who don't complete training by 2 thread"....help the woman out...even though that's where it is headed....lets get back on topic, please

Most of my advice was already covered.
1. Be consistent. That is key. If you take them out of diapers, they STAY out. DO NOT put them back in. It will cause setbacks.
2. Put the child on the potty on a perdictable schedule, every hour is what we did. Lots of praise for going on the potty, but don't scold if they don't go.
3. Do NOT make a huge deal about accidents. Don't get upset, but do have the child help in the cleanup. Deal with it in a matter of fact, we know what to do next time, type tone.
4. Don't give up. You CAN do it!! There is no "magic bullet" that is suddenly goingto make a child go in the potty evert time. You get ther through hard work, and most of all consistency. Consistent expectations, a good schedule, and consistent praise are the most important factors for success.
BTW, I wasn't trying to argue or put down anyone, just trying to contest the idea that a child is not developmentally ready to potty at 18 months. Many, many are but the parents aren't ready to commit the time to potty trainig a child that young. Some are genuinely not ready at 18 months. There is nothing wrong with waiting, but I don't pearticularlly care for the idea that it cannot or should not be done that early.

 

[RooRach0906]

I am totally for PTing early (and am now wishing I did it earlier). However, how do your 18 month olds actually get on the toilet without assistance? My 3.5 can barely get on it - she had been using a stool for a long time.

I want to start PT soon but this is one of the main questions I have. Op~ Sorry for the hijack

 

[K and K's Mommy]

We had the same thing with my youngest. For what it is worth, I blame myself for waiting too long! I trained my older two around 24-27 months. So, anyway at about 3 1/2, I asked my doctor about not pooping in the toilet.

My doctor said to continue giving him the diaper but tell him he needs to sit on the toilet with it on. After he went, we took the diaper off and flushed the contents down the toilet. After one week I was supposed to cut a hole in the diaper so the poop went directly into the toilet. I never needed to do this. After three days, my son said he no longer needed the diaper.

My doctor told me not to withhold the diaper because he might become constipated. My son was not having accidents in his underwear. He would just wait until the night when we put on his night diaper, or he would directly ask me for one.

 

[*Seanaci*]

All kids have issues with #2 when potty training...it's a new experience for them.

We started training DS when he was a little over 2.5 years old. Peeing was super easy...after 3 days of accidents. He got to the point he HATED the feeling of the pee running down his leg. Poo was a little tougher. He'd go poo...just not in the potty...he'd go in his underwear. So, we'd take him into the bathroom, take the underwear off...and dump the poo in the big potty and tell him that accidents happen...and that's where the poo belonged. He did get it after about a week. It just too consistency and keeping at it. He was completely day trained both poo and pee, by the time he turned 3. We're still working on night time training.

My advice is, just keep at it. She will get it.

 

[Mouse House Mama]

Not in my experience. Most children in my family have started training at 18-20 months and are fully trained by 2- 2 1/2. Many parents don't start that early, but there is NO reason they cannot. Some kids may not be ready, but many, many ARE.

I just wanted to point out that you are saying that your family starts training at 18-20 months and they are fully trained by 2-2.5? So that is 6-12 months to actually potty train the child. Sorry but if it is taking that long than the child is not ready.
OP- keep doing what you are doing. Don't make a big deal out of it and when your child is ready they will go. The last think you want to do is make an issue of it. Good luck!

 

[Mama Who]

Not in my experience. Most children in my family have started training at 18-20 months and are fully trained by 2- 2 1/2. Many parents don't start that early, but there is NO reason they cannot. Some kids may not be ready, but many, many ARE.

Since the PP clearly did not actually read my post and cannot resist reassuring herself that I'm wrong about everything...

OP, your child MIGHT not be physically ready. She might be, but if she is really resistant, I'd still consider holding off. Whether the issue is physical or mental, there's a point at which pushing her isn't going to be in anyone's best interests. You might try Googling "elimination communication" and hitting some of the parenting forums that pop up. If you're certain she's capable and what you're doing isn't working, a change of direction might help. If it turns out she's simply not ready, she'll be in good company. Lots of children just aren't at that age and there's no shame in that.

 

[*Seanaci*]

Since the PP clearly did not actually read my post and cannot resist reassuring herself that I'm wrong about everything...

OP, your child MIGHT not be physically ready. She might be, but if she is really resistant, I'd still consider holding off. Whether the issue is physical or mental, there's a point at which pushing her isn't going to be in anyone's best interests. You might try Googling "elimination communication" and hitting some of the parenting forums that pop up. If you're certain she's capable and what you're doing isn't working, a change of direction might help. If it turns out she's simply not ready, she'll be in good company. Lots of children just aren't at that age and there's no shame in that.

My mom did daycare for 25+ years. Potty trained TONS of kids. She personally found the ideal age to start potty training was around 2 years old. Kids are more aware of their bodies and bodily functions...and can communicate clearer when they need to go. Kids who were younger usually took longer to potty train because they weren't yet fully aware of when they had to go and/or weren't able to communicate their need to go.

So yeah...I agree...some kids just aren't ready before the age of 2...while some are. It just all depends on the child.

 

[Queen2PrincessG]

Lol, you cannot train a dog or a kid or any other being to do something they are not physiologically ready to do. So, how many children have you potty trained?

One because I only have one and there are not outside influences. Why are you comparing children to dogs. You should do a little research and look at how and when other countries potty train. It might surprise you. It's us not them. CHILDREN ARE SMART! Sometimes though, we can hinder them by our own inactivity.

 

[Queen2PrincessG]

We got SERIOUS resistance form the day care to starting our DD early. They believed it would never work. I had her pee trained at home by about 20 months, but the DC wouldn't even consider taking her to the potty until she was at least 2. She would have been trained much earlier if I had gotten more support form daycare. As I said, eveyone in our family trains early, and most are fully trained by 2, 2 /2 at the very latest. My niece just turning 2 this week, and only wears diapers in the pool!

Oh THAT SUCKS AND PISSES ME OFF! you are paying them they should be helping you and DD meet your goal.
it's an example of laziness though. They didn't want to do the work.

 

[Queen2PrincessG]

Most of my advice was already covered.
1. Be consistent. That is key. If you take them out of diapers, they STAY out. DO NOT put them back in. It will cause setbacks.
2. Put the child on the potty on a perdictable schedule, every hour is what we did. Lots of praise for going on the potty, but don't scold if they don't go.
3. Do NOT make a huge deal about accidents. Don't get upset, but do have the child help in the cleanup. Deal with it in a matter of fact, we know what to do next time, type tone.
4. Don't give up. You CAN do it!! There is no "magic bullet" that is suddenly going to make a child go in the potty every time. You get there through hard work, and most of all consistency. Consistent expectations, a good schedule, and consistent praise are the most important factors for success.

Exactly what we did! We gave stickers and sometimes an oreo if it was without us prompting her.

 

[Momof2princess']

Being non computer savy I don't know how to copy specific posts to reply to. One day I might try For those that have asked if she can get on the potty, we keep a little potty in our kitchen/livingroom area. She always wears dressed and can take off underwear by herself. She just pushes her undies down and sits on the potty. Usually if I ask her if she needs to go(which is every 2ish hours if she hasn't gone for that 2 hours) I ask which potty she wants to go on. She always says the big potty so thats where we go. She still can't get on it by herself, but it's no big deal to go in there for a moment or two with her while she goes. I think her biggest problem with #2 is that she wont stay on the toilet for long enough. Yesterday when she went #2 it was moments after getting off the potty (she got on herself.) So im sure it is connecting.
For the posters that say I shouldn't push it, im wondering if you are attributing some of the other posters comments to me? My DD is ALREADY potty trained. She wears underwear all day and night. Once or twice a day I have to change said underwear because of poop, but being that I use cloth diapers, spraying poop out of underwear really isn't that big a deal.
For those that are offering real suggestions, thanks.

 

[Queen2PrincessG]

Could you give her a little timer Also I would ask her every hour vs. every 2. Is there a time where she normally goes poop? DD always goes early in the AM and right before Dinner. Sometimes she will surprise us with a mid day poop too.

 

[Mouse House Mama]

Being non computer savy I don't know how to copy specific posts to reply to. One day I might try For those that have asked if she can get on the potty, we keep a little potty in our kitchen/livingroom area. She always wears dressed and can take off underwear by herself. She just pushes her undies down and sits on the potty. Usually if I ask her if she needs to go(which is every 2ish hours if she hasn't gone for that 2 hours) I ask which potty she wants to go on. She always says the big potty so thats where we go. She still can't get on it by herself, but it's no big deal to go in there for a moment or two with her while she goes. I think her biggest problem with #2 is that she wont stay on the toilet for long enough. Yesterday when she went #2 it was moments after getting off the potty (she got on herself.) So im sure it is connecting.
For the posters that say I shouldn't push it, im wondering if you are attributing some of the other posters comments to me? My DD is ALREADY potty trained. She wears underwear all day and night. Once or twice a day I have to change said underwear because of poop, but being that I use cloth diapers, spraying poop out of underwear really isn't that big a deal.
For those that are offering real suggestions, thanks.

I think that you are not understanding what many of us are saying. Poop training can be difficult even when a child is pee trained. They don't like the feeling, they want to control it etc. Sometimes if a child is pushed too much they will hold it and it can cause intestinal damage. She may be going #2 after she gets off because she does not like the feel of it on the potty. Some things just have to happen o n their own. You mention that she is dry at night. Well you can't train a child to do that. Their body has to be ready. So her body is ready for overnight dryness but she may not be ready for #2 in the potty. Don't make a big deal and it will happen eventually.

 

[mjkacmom]

I think that you are not understanding what many of us are saying. Poop training can be difficult even when a child is pee trained. They don't like the feeling, they want to control it etc. Sometimes if a child is pushed too much they will hold it and it can cause intestinal damage. She may be going #2 after she gets off because she does not like the feel of it on the potty. Some things just have to happen o n their own. You mention that she is dry at night. Well you can't train a child to do that. Their body has to be ready. So her body is ready for overnight dryness but she may not be ready for #2 in the potty. Don't make a big deal and it will happen eventually.

I think of it like this - for the child's entire life, she's been standing up to poop, with her bottom completely covered. Now, she is instructed to sit with a bare bottom, and poop. Would it be hard for you to stand up and poop in your pants? Pee is much easier, because it's much harder to hold. Usually it only takes one or two times of pooping in the potty for a child to get over the fear, and it usually happens on accident, but it will happen. Until then, don't worry about it.

 

[princessmom29]

I just wanted to point out that you are saying that your family starts training at 18-20 months and they are fully trained by 2-2.5? So that is 6-12 months to actually potty train the child. Sorry but if it is taking that long than the child is not ready.
OP- keep doing what you are doing. Don't make a big deal out of it and when your child is ready they will go. The last think you want to do is make an issue of it. Good luck!

Typically about 6 months to absolutely no accidents, even at night. Most of my daycare kids who started closer to three took just a long to get to absolutely NO accidents. Most ofthem ar going comsistently on the potty much earlier, but they still have lapses.

Since the PP clearly did not actually read my post and cannot resist reassuring herself that I'm wrong about everything...

OP, your child MIGHT not be physically ready. She might be, but if she is really resistant, I'd still consider holding off. Whether the issue is physical or mental, there's a point at which pushing her isn't going to be in anyone's best interests. You might try Googling "elimination communication" and hitting some of the parenting forums that pop up. If you're certain she's capable and what you're doing isn't working, a change of direction might help. If it turns out she's simply not ready, she'll be in good company. Lots of children just aren't at that age and there's no shame in that.

Isn't that exactly what i siadi n the post you quoted? Now who is "not reading". I said "some kids may not be ready, but many, many are". Did you misss that??? And exactly where did I say you were wrong about everything??? I still don't see that.