Drowning?? Arts of animation

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I have a 3 year old and all day long my heart has been breaking for this family. I lost my three year old at Great Wolf Lodge in February. I was standing at the bottom of the slide, her father was standing at the top. My parents were sitting at a table beside the pool that she had to pass on her way up the stairs to her father. Around and around she went. And not one of us noticed when he hopped in the lazy river nearby. She was wearing a puddle jumper and has had perpetual swimming lessons since she was 11 months old. We thought she was safe to circle around the pool by herself. All the kids were doing it. But we took our eyes off her and she hopped in another pool where her head was barely above the water. She was in the middle of a tube when the lifeguards finally found her. She was not immediately visible to anyone. Both my father and I checked the lazy river within seconds of realizing she'd wandered off. There but for the grace of God go I.....

As an aside, when I was 6, my 5 year old brother who could swim was swept out of a shallow rock pool where he had been playing with our cousins and siblings. There were 11 children and 3 adults in that pool, including our 10 month old sister, 18 month old cousin and 3 year old brother who couldn't walk at the time. And yet the 5 year old who could swim was the child swept away. He drowned. I have witnessed first hand the agony that parents face in a situation like this and hope that the uninformed masses showed my parents a little more compassion and a whole lot more sympathy than a few of you have exhibited today.

I've been thinking about it all day, too. And I'm so sorry for you and your parents. When my youngest daughter was born, she had surgery at four days for a heart defect. When she was still in the PICU, I was holding her in a rocking chair when a boy was brought in who'd been hit by a car. He'd missed the bus, so was riding his bike to school. I didn't have to be told the boy didn't make it. I heard his father's reaction. And I will never, ever forget the sound of his voice.
 
Some parents can prevent their child from running. Some can't. It's cruel to speculate what kind of parents these might have been, without more information.

I think the important thing we ALL need to remember is that when it comes to parenting there's always an element of LUCK involved.

When I had one child, I thought I had it all figured out. Whenever I saw other parents with kids doing things MY child would never, ever do, I thought they must be terrible parents. Why couldn't they teach their kids better? They must not be very good at discipline. Then I had a second child, and suddenly I had to start all over again, learning how to parent. Everything I thought I knew, it didn't mean a darn thing when it came to managing that second child.

And it's not that my first was easy and my second was difficult, they were just completely unique. Suddenly, I had SO much admiration for the parents of multiples!

Your child, as you wrote in another post, knew not to wander off. That's great! You're lucky you either had a kid who wasn't a wanderer, or one who actually learned not to wander when you first tried to teach them. Wonderful! Another child, another parent, they may not be so lucky. These ones certainly weren't.

The phrase "there but for the Grace of God go I" isn't a cop out. It's not an excuse, allowing us to be lazy, irresponsible parents. It's an expression of compassion and empathy, recognizing that terrible things can happen to anyone, no matter how virtuous, or how proactive.

Oh... and just because folks are being nasty on Facebook doesn't mean that kind of thing is going to be welcome everywhere. I occasionally get a bit frustrated with regards to the social strictures placed on my speech, here on the Disboards. I have to try harder to be civil here. But that's okay... if I ever get tired of all the passive-aggressive snark, and just want a good knock-down drag-out brawl, there's always Reddit. ;)
 
I don't see how the bolded is true at all. I've read numerous stories in threads here on the DIS about children breaking free from a parent's grasp and running off into the crowd (usually in the "to use a child harness ot not to use a harness" type threads). These children are literally holding hands with parents, not just within reach, and they still break free and can disappear into the crowd in an instant.

In large crowds our 3 year old was in a stroller or being carried. It is just different styles of parenting. It breaks my heart it happened. But many on Facebook agree with my point of view. I am going to respectfully say we will disagree. Also as a former water safety instructor my children knew how to to swim at that age.

And yes as a former teacher, if you have a runner and some kids are, I say a harness at theme parks is a good thing.

But maybe discussion will help someone else. We have over 40 years of going to Disney, it can be a very dangerous place.
 
The phrase "there but for the Grace of God go I" isn't a cop out. It's not an excuse, allowing us to be lazy, irresponsible parents. It's an expression of compassion and empathy, recognizing that terrible things can happen to anyone, no matter how virtuous, or how proactive.

Absolutely.

I also wouldn't use Facebook as the source of reasonable and balanced thought.
 
I just wanted to say, as a health inspector who inspects pools as part of my job duties and always checks out the lifeguards at all pools that I go to, I have never seen more vigilant lifeguards then those at Disney when we visit there. They do not just sit in their guard chairs, they have always done
such a great job, from what I have observed. So sorry for this family but for the guards too, that were at the pool.
 
In large crowds our 3 year old was in a stroller or being carried. It is just different styles of parenting. It breaks my heart it happened. But many on Facebook agree with my point of view. I am going to respectfully say we will disagree. Also as a former water safety instructor my children knew how to to swim at that age.

And yes as a former teacher, if you have a runner and some kids are, I say a harness at theme parks is a good thing.

But maybe discussion will help someone else. We have over 40 years of going to Disney, it can be a very dangerous place.
My three year old can and does unbuckle himself out of the stroller from time to time. He is also stronger than I am and can wiggle free from my grasp. He is adventurous and free-spirited, and the hardest human being to control. Some kids are mild-mannered and rule-followers by nature, and some are just not. Be grateful that yours apparently were, and please stop judging parents of children, like mine, who are more spirited. It is incredibly stressful to take him anywhere, and knowing there are people out there judging me and my child when he misbehaves (like a lot of 3 year olds do!) simply because they were parents of a totally different kind of child make me ragey.
 
The number of times my own children disappeared at that age is terrifying - they're like ninja... small, suicidal ninja. It is physically impossible for a parent to have eyes on, every moment of every day. And even the most attentive, safety-conscious, paranoid parent can lose a child.

This was my first thought when I heard this story. I pictured DH and I at Disney when DD was that age. When we were done at the pool we'd both start packing up while DD sat and waited. She sat. Not because we were superior, ultra attentive parents, but because we were fortunate to have an unadventurous kid.

When I think about the trouble she could have gotten into if she chose to while we were preoccupied packing up...

I don't know what the circumstances were that brought the family to this tragedy, but I'm confident lack of love or attentiveness weren't factors. And my heart grieves for them.

For those who want to place blame on the family.... I get why you'd want to rationalize this by saying it could never happen to you because X or Y or Z... But I'm sorry to say, you're wrong.
 
This is too awful to even comprehend. I feel so terrible for this child's family, but also for the lifeguards, first responders and witnesses, who must surely have been traumatized as well.
 
Such a terrible tragedy. I had no idea about it until watching the news tonight. DH and I were just heartbroken. Those poor parents!!! Cannot imagine the horrible pain they are going through. I'm going to hug my babies extra tight tonight and say a prayer of thanks...and prayer of comfort for that family.

every person in the water had a buddy that you were responsible for watching. So in addition to the lifeguards every child had another child looking for them.

Thank you for this idea. I was always a nervous wreck when taking my kids to the pool because of so much going on. There are 5 years between my kids, so the ability level was quite different. Now that we have a pool of our own, I've become more relaxed. They're not allowed to swim without an adult being outside, but sometimes I read at the patio table, or water my plants. I'm going to start enforcing the buddy system at home, too. That way, everyone is being watched by at least 2 sets of eyes!
 
I have been reading this thread and did not want to get into controversy so refrained from posting. We have had several tragedies in our extended family where the parents (my relatives) were so completely devestated. There are no words. There is no sentance you can say. These parents will always blame themselves whether or not they are to blame. They will struggle and they may divorce (facts supported by statistics regarding parents who lose a child). This is just a tragedy. I am heartsick that anyone's trip to WDW ended in this way. I cannot imagine.
 
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