Sooooooooo....... lemme get this straight you're out peddling around with CO2 grenades and a flat tire, right?
I WAS going to tell you that I heard a rumor that Buzzy the Fly runs a towing service on the side, (the west side), (When he's not practicing dentistry) but you don't sound like the kind of customer that he would help.
When faced with this same situation NM would hike up her shorts, tie her t-shirt into a tank top and hitch a ride with the first biker gang that rode by. The bonus to this method is that the biker gangs know all the best bars and those biker bars are in desperate need of a drink upgrade, say to a nice ~n~ fruity SUNKEN TREASURE!
Those bikers drink too much beer as it is, so adding a little fruit to their diets will make their mothers very happy!
Using the Ninja Mom method results in a win, win for everybody! The bikers get more fruit in their diets, Couchy gets a ride home, Buzzy avoids towing a homicidal maniac and the rest of us benefit from all these helpful tips!
~NM