Does it bug you when strangers touch your baby?

[Wishing on a star]

Yep... it would really REALLY bother me.

Since when to strangers have the right to to touch, paw, grope, tickle, pinch, and otherwise physically accost anyone...

Babies and pregnant woman have the same rights and personal boundaries as anyone else...

I have a son who's disability made this a huge problem with him.
Strangers definitely have NO right, nor my permission... Even for a while with his one grandma... It was like she would just accost the poor thing!!! He would be very anxious and upset... I even had to let his grandmother know that there are limits.

My son's well being is FAR more more important than some misguided persons self gratification.
My child does not exist for your selfiish personal pleasure.
Back way... please... Back away...

There is a reason for the golden rule.. 'keep your hands to yourself!!!'.

 

[N&B'smom]

I'm not a fan of people touching babies that don't belong to them. I don't have really little ones anymore but I remember not liking that at all when they were small.

I remember one time we were in a store and one of the employees walked up to me and physically removed my daughter from my arms just so she could hold her. I was not at all pleased but felt a bit weird and didn't want to seem rude. I just took her right back as quickly as I could. I never imagined that the woman was coming over to take her from my arms, I thought she was just coming over to talk to her. It was very creepy and inappropriate in my opinion.

Shelby

 

[NMAmy]

Nope never bothered me at all when mine were babies, but thats just me. I can understand how some would be bothered by it, however, I dont get wanting to pummel someone for it, but hey to each his own.

On the other end of the spectrum has anyone ever pushed their baby on you? There is this one mom at my kids school and every single time we are outside talking she will get the baby out of the carseat and say here you want to hold her and practically shove her in my arms. I mean her baby is cute and cuddly and all but that doesnt mean I want to hold her. I like babies just the kind you look at and say aww how sweet, not the kind you have to actually touch and do something with.

I agree. It didn't bother me when dd was little. Heck, I thought she was pretty special, why wouldn't everyone else?

And, YES, I've met people before that will just hand their baby over to me. Oddly, while I adore toddlers and older kids, I'm just not a baby person. They're a little boring to me so I'm not one to touch someone else's baby or beg to hold it. So, it always kind of throws me off when someone I barely know will say, "Here, I KNOW you want to hold the baby!" Umm...not so much, thanks.

 

[Luv'sTink]

Never bothered me either.

Does it bother you when people play with your children? Like if your baby is in the seater on the shopping cart and someone smiles and talks to them to get them to smile, because a lot of times that involves touching.

 

[Pete's Mom]

Ditto (though, I do agree in cases where there are actual immunity issues, etc.....) I actually, liked when people touched my babies in the normal sweet ways they do - it was touching (pun not inteneded) and kind of old fashioned in a nice way. We all are so distant these days and watching people and their excitement w/ babies is a really neat treat. (And it is actually good for babies immune systems to not be kept away from all people, dirt, etc., etc.)

I agree!

 

[dogluva]

It never bothered me but I understand it does to some people so I never touch a baby unless I know the mother (and ask!). I find it hard to resist-there is something about a baby that makes you want to touch them!

I always liked when other people showed an interest in my babies. Some parents don't like it. That is fine.

 

[dogluva]

I hate, hate, hate, hate strangers touching my child. No one has permission to and it bothers me that people take offense when I ask them not to touch his face or his hands.

A worker in a local store began touching my son's face. Trying to be polite, I said to her, "I know he's cute, but please, I'd appreciate it if he wasn't touched." She then got snippy and said I was rude, that he was a baby and deservedto be touched and pinched. I then told her she must not be a mother because most moms I knew didn't want their infant touched and pinched by strangers. She gave me a dirty look and walked off.

The worst encounter was with a friend of mine. Her 3 year old son was leaning over my then 3 month olds stroller. Not only was he tipping the stroller, but he was coughing in my son's face and touching his hands and face. My friend was watching all this, not doing anything, as I repeated told her child, "Alright, that's enough, baby needs to sleep, go by your mommy," etc. Finally, I told my friend I didn't want her son hacking, touching and tipping my baby. Her response, "So you think my son is dirty?" I couldn't believe this was coming from another mother. But I guess the reality is yes, your son (and pretty much all kids and people) are dirty, so don't touch.

Btw, some posters have been asked about perming their babies hair. I've been asked quite I few times if I've highlighted my son's. Nuts.

No offense, but your baby will be a grubby three year old someday. Hard to imagine, but true. That three year old is someone's baby too. She was probably offended. But she shouldn't have let him cough all over him.

 

[EthansMom]

I would never touch someone's baby that I don't know. However, people are all over my baby when I take her out in public! They touch her hands, her face, her toes...

It doesn't really bother me, unless they touch her face or get up close to her. Squeeze her hand, tickle her feet...no problem. But I am surprised at how many people (strangers) feel free to do it!

Does it bother you?

Yes, it used to bother me. I would fib. I'd watch people and if they looked like they were reaching for my baby or getting too close, I'd say, "Oh, don't touch him/her, he/she has had a cold and I'd hate for you to get it."

It's amazing how many people think nothing of spreading their germs to your baby, but don't want to be taking home a new cold for themselves.

This worked like a charm when little kids would be reaching to touch the baby... other Mom's had no desire to have their child get sick.

 

[belle&sebastiansmom]

No offense, but your baby will be a grubby three year old someday. Hard to imagine, but true. That three year old is someone's baby too. She was probably offended. But she shouldn't have let him cough all over him.

When my baby grows into a grubby three year old, I will teach him that mommy feels it's inappropriate to touch little babies. Look but don't touch. That's what my grubby four year old lives by and she is the most affectionate child imaginable, but she knows where her boundaries are. And if she doesn't, I gently remind her.

 

[jamimb]

When my baby grows into a grubby three year old, I will teach him that mommy feels it's inappropriate to touch little babies. Look but don't touch. That's what my grubby four year old lives by and she is the most affectionate child imaginable, but she knows where her boundaries are. And if she doesn't, I gently remind her.

Telling my children not to touch a stranger's baby is one thing but to tell them not to touch a friend's or relative's baby well that seems kinda nuts!
I wonder how many of the moms here who have said it would bother them are first time moms. It seems with the first baby we freak out over every little thing. Everyone has to wash their hands to hold the baby and we sterilize everything under the sun. By the time the 2nd or 3rd rolls around everything changes and all the sudden the 6 month old can now chew on just about anything so long as he's not hurting himself!

 

[ilisao]

Telling my children not to touch a stranger's baby is one thing but to tell them not to touch a friend's or relative's baby well that seems kinda nuts!
I wonder how many of the moms here who have said it would bother them are first time moms. It seems with the first baby we freak out over every little thing. Everyone has to wash their hands to hold the baby and we sterilize everything under the sun. By the time the 2nd or 3rd rolls around everything changes and all the sudden the 6 month old can now chew on just about anything so long as he's not hurting himself!

I have a 6 and 9 year old. I was didn't want people just coming up to either one of them and touching. And yes, they know not to touch a friend or relative's baby without permission. It is not nuts to teach common courtesy and to respect boundaries.

 

[stacy347]

Telling my children not to touch a stranger's baby is one thing but to tell them not to touch a friend's or relative's baby well that seems kinda nuts!
I wonder how many of the moms here who have said it would bother them are first time moms. It seems with the first baby we freak out over every little thing. Everyone has to wash their hands to hold the baby and we sterilize everything under the sun. By the time the 2nd or 3rd rolls around everything changes and all the sudden the 6 month old can now chew on just about anything so long as he's not hurting himself!

I can appreciate the fact that having people touching your children at will doesn't bother you so I hope you can appreciate the fact that it is a huge problem for me. As I stated in an earlier post in this thread, my youngest is Austistic and can not tolerate touching unless it is initiated by her (sometimes me but even that is limited and she has been this way from 6 months of age so even as a baby this was an issue and it is with many Autistic babies). Friends and family have learned to deal with this fact and have never given me any attitude about it ~ frankly, I can't imagine why it would be a bigger deal to explain this to family than strangers ~ I guess I'm lucky in that regard.
At any rate, it has nothing to do with being germophobic or a paranoid new mom (been doing this for 15 years as of yesterday so that nervous nellie mode is long gone, LOL). Sometimes it's just nice if people take a second to think before they act.

 

[Mouse House Mama]

Telling my children not to touch a stranger's baby is one thing but to tell them not to touch a friend's or relative's baby well that seems kinda nuts!
I wonder how many of the moms here who have said it would bother them are first time moms. It seems with the first baby we freak out over every little thing. Everyone has to wash their hands to hold the baby and we sterilize everything under the sun. By the time the 2nd or 3rd rolls around everything changes and all the sudden the 6 month old can now chew on just about anything so long as he's not hurting himself!

Well I have 4 kids so I get what you are saying but I don't like ANYONE touching my kids if I don't know you. It is innappropriate. We are a very affectionate family so it is not a germ thing. I just don't like it. At Home Depot one day there was a Mom with 2 small children. They were interested in our youngest. I get that. I am patient with that. However- they were in our child's face. The Mom was trying to get them away but to be honest- they shouldn't have been all over our child to begin with. I know babies are attractive to people but they are still people. I would hope that you wouldn't come up to me in the store and pinch my cheeks because they are so cute and chubby. (and yes- my family still does that to me. )
Of course you wouldn't because there is no reason to touch me. You do not know me. Kids are people not some amusement. People complain that they don't want strangers petting their dogs so why would they feel the need to touch someone's child?

 

[MoniqueU]

I was never afraid of my kids getting sick just from someone touching them and would let most people hold them but i was mostly just surrounded by family and friends. And then when I had more then one i was used to having other kids around so that didn't bother me.
I will be honest though that I don't like holding other peoples babies especially when I first had my oldest. They used different soap and that would throw my whole mommy instincts off. Really strange I know. I don't even like to hold my own families newborns. I am not nervous or anything, after having as many kids as I have it just isn't something I like.

It also bugs the living daylights out of me to see someone cover up the babies baby carrier. I wouldn't want to be enclosed like that as an adult and wouldnt want my child to be either.

ETA I now have older kids and quite a few I have known for years and we have a pool. I don't even like to put sunscreen on the kids. Thank goodness for spray sunscreen.

 

[Sheree Bobbins]

Yes, yes and yes.

 

[BoyLovesBuzz]

For those of you that are okay with stranger touching your kid , would you be okay with a stranger touching you?

 

[jamimb]

I can appreciate the fact that having people touching your children at will doesn't bother you so I hope you can appreciate the fact that it is a huge problem for me. As I stated in an earlier post in this thread, my youngest is Austistic and can not tolerate touching unless it is initiated by her (sometimes me but even that is limited and she has been this way from 6 months of age so even as a baby this was an issue and it is with many Autistic babies). Friends and family have learned to deal with this fact and have never given me any attitude about it ~ frankly, I can't imagine why it would be a bigger deal to explain this to family than strangers ~ I guess I'm lucky in that regard.
At any rate, it has nothing to do with being germophobic or a paranoid new mom (been doing this for 15 years as of yesterday so that nervous nellie mode is long gone, LOL). Sometimes it's just nice if people take a second to think before they act.

I say it wouldnt bother me and I don't think it would but to tell you the truth I can't think of a time it's actually happened (probably because it does not bother me!) I totally don't get the whole "I want to pummel someone for touching my baby" thing. That person did not mean any ill will and was just trying to be friendly. I get that it may bother some (I have never done it myself) but take into consideration that their was no malicious intent I'm sure! and if it brightens a little old ladies day and does no harm to your baby why get so mad about it? I totally get the strangers's baby thing and would never allow my children to touch a child they don't know but am blown away by the fact that some would not let friend's or relatives touch their baby. Would you hug a friend or relative or shake their hand . That's all Im saying, I get the stranger thing but for the life of me do not understand why you wouldnt want a friend or family member to touch baby! (not you specifically stacy) I totally understand the reasoning behind why the autistic child does not want to be touched! When adutls meet new people they shake their hands alot of times so what is so offensive about a three year old touching the hand of a baby in a store. They are just saying hello. Iam not at all trying to turn this into a debate at all I respect your views (everyone views) I just don't understand them all the time

 

[Mouse House Mama]

For those of you that are okay with stranger touching your kid , would you be okay with a stranger touching you?

That is exactly my point.
Thank you.

 

[rwrocksme]

I've got an even better one...

Strangers throwing holy water on you in the grocery store...

 

[ilisao]

I say it wouldnt bother me and I don't think it would but to tell you the truth I can't think of a time it's actually happened (probably because it does not bother me!) I totally don't get the whole "I want to pummel someone for touching my baby" thing. That person did not mean any ill will and was just trying to be friendly. I get that it may bother some (I have never done it myself) but take into consideration that their was no malicious intent I'm sure! and if it brightens a little old ladies day and does no harm to your baby why get so mad about it? I totally get the strangers's baby thing and would never allow my children to touch a child they don't know but am blown away by the fact that some would not let friend's or relatives touch their baby. Would you hug a friend or relative or shake their hand . That's all Im saying, I get the stranger thing but for the life of me do not understand why you wouldnt want a friend or family member to touch baby! (not you specifically stacy) I totally understand the reasoning behind why the autistic child does not want to be touched! When adutls meet new people they shake their hands alot of times so what is so offensive about a three year old touching the hand of a baby in a store. They are just saying hello. Iam not at all trying to turn this into a debate at all I respect your views (everyone views) I just don't understand them all the time

I think people are saying they don't want anyone touching their kids WITHOUT PERMISSION. If a friend or relative wants to, then the courteous thing would be to ask. Knowing a person doesn't give you the right to automatically touch their kid. As for shaking hands, when I shake hands with people, it's because I choose to do so. Most people don't go around just grabbing other people's hands.

Maybe some of you believe otherwise, but babies are not playthings. They are people and even though they are very limited in their communication, their personal space needs to be respected.