Does anyone have any experience with Post Traumatic Stress Disorder??

[MelindaKiah]

My husband is in the military and 8 years ago, he was part of the recovery efforts from the Swiss Air 111 disaster. I will not go into details about the horrific things he seen. He has been suppressing all his feelings for the past 8 years. This past July, we moved to Halifax, Nova Scotia, which is very close to the crash site. He finally told me Saturday night how he thinks about it all the time, he has flashbacks, he feels guilty for not being able to help anyone, and he just cannot even think about anything else anymore.

My husband is one of the strongest people I've ever known...always so happy, and fun. He is now always sad, crying a lot, and feels just hopeless.

I've convinced him he needs to talk to someone, and we're awaiting a call on a referral to a counsellor.

I am trying so hard to help him by just being there and listening when he needs to talk, and just holding his hand when he doesn't want to talk. I feel so helpless.

Does anyone have any experience and/or advice on PTSD?

thanks for listening!

 

[Twinkles6892]

Here's a hug for your poor dh

I'm not sure why you have a laughing smilie though. A typo perhaps?

 

[TiggerCat]

MelindaKiah,

Being in the CF myself I am well acquainted with PTSD and serving members. I am also familiar with the recovery efforts made by our personnel throughout the SwissAir disaster. You need to talk with your husband and gently advise him that he needs to discuss this with someone from the medical/social worker staff and that there is no shame in doing this. He may be able to deal with this on his own but I think that the studies have shown that it is best to work this out with the experts who are used to dealing with these types of stresses. He will be in good hands and I can guarantee that the staff at the base hospital have dealt with this alot.

Best of luck!

T.C.

 

[Dodie]

It sounds just horrible. I hope you can get him to get help.

 

[DMickey28]

I am sure that the OP did not mean that smiley to be rolling on the floor laughing. I think that the smiley can also looking like a smiley crying and being very upset.... maybe frustrated because she can't help.

Hugs to you and your husband..

 

[barkley]

i was the target of death threats (as were my child and my husband) due to a volitile employee i supervised in 1992. in 1999 i began dealing with another employee who while not as vocaly hostile was hostile none the less. i began to suffer from medical problems (intense migranes, anxiety attacks severe enough to mirror heart attack symptoms, huge emotional swings...) and ended up having 2 strokes. in hindsight (via psychological therapy) i discovered other symptoms that i never would have equated were related to the stress i was enduring (a sudden fear of crossing bridges with my car-the bridge i crossed was the last interchange in driving to arrive at my job, hypersensitivy to saying anything negative to my kids or spouse-negative statements at work resulted in bodily injury or death threats).
i was diagnosed with ptsd and as a result of not receiving timely treatment suffered a complete mental and physical breakdown when i encountered a similar circumstance in the workplace that resulted in my disability to the extent that i am no longer able to work.

encourage your dh to seek treatment for this-timely addressing of the circumstances can aide in being able to deal with seemingly unrealated issues that bring up old emotions.

the thing that realy "kills" me-when my employer sent me for a psychiatric evaluation after the first episode-they were advised (not me-they confidentialy) to provide counseling at the time of the event in order to prevent ptsd. they did not disclose this to me, nor provide it-"NOT COST EFFECTIVE"-well, now they will provide me with retirement and medical benefits for the remainder of my life

hugs to you and your dh.

 

[MelindaKiah]

Thanks everyone.

And, I absolutely did NOT intend to put that laughing smilie. I was horrified when I seen it. It wasn't there to start, then I edited the topic title, and it appeared. Not sure how that happened but in no means do I find any humor i this horrible situation.

 

[Dan Murphy]

I wish him well and peace of mind, Melinda.

 

[Rafiki Rafiki Rafiki]

Melinda--there is help out there!

I'm not sure about the military policies in Canada, but doctors here give prompt and special attention to military members who suffer from PTSD.

In addition to counseling, there is a treatment called EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing) that helps thousands of people with PTSD.

Here's a link to an article that discusses EMDR: http://mailer.fsu.edu/~cfigley/Book/BTT/emdr.htm

It may seem like a lot of whooha when you first read the article, but I went through this with my daughter. It's an intriguing therapy that has been established in the medical community for treating PTSD. And I can tell you it made a huge difference for my daughter.

Good luck getting him the help he needs. And please urge him not to be scared or feel like he will be labeled as having a mental problem. Many soldiers go through the trauma of death experiences, and without help, life never really gets back to normal.

 

[Keli]

I have extensive experience with a loved one going through this and I cannot describle the extent of the pain, heartache, trama, confusion and devestation this condition causes to both the victem and his/her loved ones. Getting help is a necessity (glad you're working on that for your dh). I wish him all the best in his recovery.

 

[ImarriedGrumpy]

My mother had PTSD (from childhood abuse) and I have participated in a lot of therapy and done a lot of research to understand this mental illness. There are a wide variety of treatment options, but THE most important thing to do is get treatment. Sometimes anti-depressants and/or anti-anxiety medications can be helpful, especially at the begining of therapy.

I'd encourage you to do an internet search for PTSD - there are a number of support groups for family members, including some with message boards and chat rooms. I'd also encourage you to get counseling, even if your DH doesn't get treatment. You are also going through a rough time, and you need to take care of yourself as well as your family. You will be better able to help your husband if you are also getting help.

Hang in there - I know it is hard to live with someone with PTSD.

 

[mariethecat]

I do not have any advise on PTSD but I am quite familiar with the crash as I live in Halifax. I was working very close to the crash site at the time. One of the customers at the place where I was working thought she saw the plane as it was going down. A friend worked at the lab for DNA testing for the remains which was not a pleasant task. I went to Peggy's Cove a few weeks after the crash and it was very emotional to see all the flowers and other momentos that were on the rocks. The memorial site close to Peggy's Cove is a nice peaceful site to visit. The accident was very tragic but would have been much worse if the airplane had stayed on its flight path which was over the Halifax area. The pilot went back over the ocean to dump fuel which probably saved more lives. Hope your husband can get some professional help soon.

 

[Pea-n-Me]

Part of the remedy for PTSD is first recognizing it so your DH is on his way to getting the help and support he needs. My father as a WWll combat veteran had it severly but it went unrecognized and he was never able to get the help he needed. Fortunately, we now know a lot about it and there are services out there not only for veterans and serviceworkers but also the general public.

Best of luck to your husband, understanding and support will go a long way to helping him deal with these intense and real emotions.

 

[TEENEE]

I agree with the poster who said you too should get help. When a loved one has ptsd it it possible for those around him or her to have secondary ptsd. You have a lot to deal with in taking care of yourself and helping your husband. If you have children don't forget secondary ptsd can also affect them. Good luck to you and your family.

 

[Huggles]

I had PTSD and can vouch for the benefits of EMDR therapy.