Do your kids pay rent?

[CTdiznymom]

We have twin 26yr old. girls who have moved back home since graduating college. One is a full time teacher and gets paid pretty well. The other is finishing her masters at a local University and works full time in the school system aiding Special Needs students but makes a meager wage. It gives her the flexibility to takes her classes. I'm a sahm so I shop for & cook all meals, wash/iron everyones clothes, clean etc. They pay for anything related to their car, and their personal bills. They of course buy their own clothes and personal items. My question is, do your kids pay rent? What other things do your older kids who live home do? My DH says I should stop doing their laundry, but if I didn't the washer/dryer would be going 24/7 and the water bill would be $$$. I'm feeling like the maid, and frankly they are not very appreciative (but that's another dilema). Whew.....felt good to vent a little

 

[mom2austin]

Both of my sister-in-laws (once is 28, the other is 26) live at home with my MIL and FIL and neither pay rent. As a matter of fact, the oldest one just paid cash for a brand new car last week because she's never moved out and paid rent to anyone anywhere. It's a little frustrating to watch as DH and I struggle a little (things have gotten better, but they were very rough for awhile) and his sisters pay nothing.

It doesn't seem to bother my in-laws though, so we really have no say in it.

Why would the washer/dryer run 24/7 if you dont do their laundry? personally, they would either pay rent or else they would buy their own food and do their own laundry. I think you might see them actually try to find a place to live if they had to pay you rent!

 

[robsmom]

My parents charged us rent once we were no longer in school and were working. I lived at home until I got married and every year the rent would go up by $50 per month. My mother used to tell me that in the real world I would have a landlord that raised the rent and I was in the real world now. By the end I was paying $550 a month to live in my bedroom!! She did most of the cooking and a lot of the laundry. One thing that my parents did was save all the rent we paid in a wedding fund. When we got married they gave each of us $10k towards wedding expenses. I think this was a fair plan. It taught me to budget for housing expenses each month, but still allowed me to save some money, pay off school loans and get myself started on the right foot.

 

[mrsklamc]

Forget rent- at 26 it's time to MOVE OUT!

 

[npierce25]

When my husband was working full time and living at home he had to pay rent and still do dishes and his own laundry. this was about 10 years ago, and he had to pay $200 a month. It made him be responable. it was inforced when he was no longer a student (even though he started an aprencticeship for a local union that his step dad was in, but he wasent in college). it will be hard to start it out of no where, but it stinks that they are not appriciative. do you need the finincial help? I'm not asking that to be rude, just thinking that if you charged them something and you didnt need it you could possible put it in a savings for them as a suprise when they got their own place on day. just a thought. good luck

 

[tink2dw]

It is so different now than the '70 when I left home at 18 never to go back. I have a 23 year old who is still at home. When she had a job she paid for her own things. But my Husband and DD both lost their jobs 2 years ago. We are now moving in with friends until DH can find work as an LPN or finish school.

So, no DD doesn't pay rent.

 

[Kae]

Forget rent- at 26 it's time to MOVE OUT!

Or at the very least you need to stop being their maid, because if you did not do these things for your girls they would not be living with you rent or not. And I understand that you want to keep your home in a certain order & that you love your kids.

Kae

 

[ShiPooOwner]

We have twin 26yr old. girls who have moved back home since graduating college. One is a full time teacher and gets paid pretty well. The other is finishing her masters at a local University and works full time in the school system aiding Special Needs students but makes a meager wage. It gives her the flexibility to takes her classes. I'm a sahm so I shop for & cook all meals, wash/iron everyones clothes, clean etc. They pay for anything related to their car, and their personal bills. They of course buy their own clothes and personal items. My question is, do your kids pay rent? What other things do your older kids who live home do? My DH says I should stop doing their laundry, but if I didn't the washer/dryer would be going 24/7 and the water bill would be $$$. I'm feeling like the maid, and frankly they are not very appreciative (but that's another dilema). Whew.....felt good to vent a little

Yes, my kids paid rent (I can't remember how much but maybe $50-75 a month so not much imo) after they graduated and had fulltime jobs but were living at home. One thought it was terribly unfair of us. He wasn't required to do anything around the house including his own laundry, but I did expect him to clean his own bedroom and bathroom. Unless I persistently insisted that he cleaned them, he let it slide to the point that the health dept. would probably have declared it unfit for human habitation. The other child didn't complain and probably realized he had a pretty good deal going.

 

[Swmr359]

I lived with my parents last year and am moving back this summer (hopefully only the summer!); I am 25. I did not pay rent, but I did help around the house. I made dinner when I didn't work in the evening, I walked the dog, cleaned up the yard, did laundry, keep the house clean... My parents talked about charging rent (and I would have happily paid), but decided not to so I could save to go to grad school.
I don't think there is anything wrong with charging your kids rent.

 

[The Iron Giant]

When I was 22 and started my first full time job, my parents charged me $400 per month to live at home. That was 16 years ago. My older sister got the same deal.

It taught me how to budget and I saved about $25k to put down on my first home.

My friends did look at me like I had 3 heads when I would tell them how much I had to pay to sleep in my own bed

 

[disneymarie]

No matter what the income of the children, they paid their portion. Especially with the car. The chores have to be hounded at times. I need their help, they are extra work.

Even if you take the portion and invest it in a trust, per a wedding, home extended schooling, your vacation dream it is there.

If anything heaven forbid happen to you, where would they fall right now? I guess because I had my own business and rented from my parents by 19 years old I never thought they owed me anything. I was over 18.

I financed my college, paid my loans, bought my car, took care of its insurance and mechanical needs. Yes dad helped with oil changes and tune ups, I did mom's perms, and mending, anything needed around the home.

THe 26 yr old living at home now has disabilities, he is working a few half days. This covers his expenses. He has to contribute to the chores, he whines, I keep telling him, if something happened tomorrow how would he run the whole home?

Even if you do not need the income, some day you may, and they are bright girls, being pampered, make them strong girls to pamper Mom.
Make sure they know home making, how to fit it in, mend items, iron a shirt, get the wrinkles out in a hurry, soak a stain, make meals and freeze something to make in a hurry.

I started with breakfast, then lunch items. supper kids helped when big enough to set a table
They are learning all the culture cooking now for their own families, along with helping me declutter.

I always wanted my children to be prepared for if anything happens. We are not there yet, but working at it.
I don't know why, maybe being the oldest of 6 I was running a home and family of three by 20, and that was just the way things were then.

I think if I had been at home, being on apron strings, I never would have the life skills to rely on now. Dang if my mother bought me underwear, she had her hand out for repayment....she was difficult though....
I moved out on my own from the physical and mental abuse.Thank goodness for my grandmothers nurturing to show love.

 

[darthspud]

I live at home and do not pay rent.. however... I moved back home when my step father got real sick and help my mother take care of him until he passed away from cancer and I just stayed living at home to keep my mother company it has been just her and I for 3 years now.. trust me I'd love to have my own place but I went back to college and changed jobs so living at home has been a blessing... but trust me I pull my weight around here... with in the last year my mother met some one new and has been spending several nights and almost all weekend at his place so I do all the cooking and cleaning.. I do the vast majority of the food shopping and I take care of her dog (which has more become my dog then hers but whatever)

 

[Forevryoung]

I'm 25 and I live at home. All of my friends my age live at home unless they are married. We live on Long Island where a studio costs $900-$1000 a month.

I don't pay rent to my parents. I have been doing my own laundry since I was 10. Dad and I rotate doing the dishes (Mom cooks). I pay my own bills, including breakfast/lunches that I eat at home but I shop/pay for those groceries.

I can't afford to move out and continue living here. So my choice is move out of state or continue living at home. DBF and I have discussed moving out of our parents' homes. I can see it happening at the end of the summer (8 months away) as long as I get a steady job. I didn't expect to be living at home, the economy messed with my "life plans" a bit

 

[kellia]

If they are done with college and working, I think they should pay something in rent to get them ready for being on their own. If you really don't need the money, you could always invest it for them to get later on. As for doing their laundry and such, HECK NO! Why on earth would they ever want to move out if they have a maid?? They are adults and should act like adults by taking care of themselves, or move out!

 

[reneebaker]

We had to move back in with my husbands parents for a time and we did end up paying rent. They had an old home and their utility bill was outrageous considering the smallness of the home so we just paid the utilities. I think it ran around 400 dollars a month. At the time it benefited the both of us because it helped them out as well as us. But then you get the catch 22 that it took us longer to move out because it took us longer to save to buy a home while paying for part of theirs.....

 

[descovy]

My plan... for what it's worth...my oldest is only 10! is that if they have to live at home outside of high school is that they pay rent.

Not to be mean, or even "recoup" the costs. Quite the opposite, to be helpful. Because if you are not used to paying rent... it is very hard to leave.

My best friend had this problem. Lived at home until 24. Hated every minute of it. Made a decent income for a single girl, but spent money on a nicer car, nicer lifestyle than she could afford. Because well, in your 20's you shouldn't live as well as your parents do in their 40's! Not setting money aside for housing she "felt" like she couldn't afford to move out.

I plan to charge rent, to get my young adult children in tune with spending their cash on living expenses. So it can't be all blown in make up, eating out, nice cars. They will be living a lifestyle in their means, not artificially so.

The good news is that I would chuck the "rent" into savings. So when they do move out, they have a nice chunk saved up, for deposit, furniture, whatever they need. And they will be in the "habit" already of using their funds (no matter how meager) for housing.

My DH and I kind of did this when we bought our 1st home. Was going to cost $1000/mo for a mortgage, but we only paid $600/mo in rent. To "get used to" what $1000 felt like, we simply socked an extra $400/mo in savings. That way we were in the habit of spending $1000/mo and it wasn't a shock. We "felt" the sacrifices it would take to afford our housing. Better yet, a little extra money saved up!

I imagine if my child were in dire straights, I would take them in rent free. But as soon as they could afford more than a basics... (like going out to eat, movies, fancy grooming, a "nicer" car) it would be time to charge rent.

We have twin 26yr old. girls who have moved back home since graduating college. One is a full time teacher and gets paid pretty well. The other is finishing her masters at a local University and works full time in the school system aiding Special Needs students but makes a meager wage. It gives her the flexibility to takes her classes. I'm a sahm so I shop for & cook all meals, wash/iron everyones clothes, clean etc. They pay for anything related to their car, and their personal bills. They of course buy their own clothes and personal items. My question is, do your kids pay rent? What other things do your older kids who live home do? My DH says I should stop doing their laundry, but if I didn't the washer/dryer would be going 24/7 and the water bill would be $$$. I'm feeling like the maid, and frankly they are not very appreciative (but that's another dilema). Whew.....felt good to vent a little

 

[Keli]

In your situation I would charge them rent and have them do their own laundry. Charging them $200 a month each would cover any additional expenses from excessive laundry washing and would not be cheap rent for them.

 

[Lucky4me]

Yes, once they were done with schooling, I asked them for a monthly amount which I put away for them. Then one son took his savings, bought a house and the other two roomed with him for awhile.
It was a great thing for all of us. :lol
Oh and I taught them to do their own laundry at 11 years old.
The water bill wasn't much different than it is now.

 

[amylynne01]

When I moved back home at 22 after college and was working full time, my parents charged me $50 a week for rent on top of my car payment, insurance, and cell phone. I was also expected to do my part at home, either by cooking, cleaning, doing the grocery shopping, or laundry for the house. I don't think it's unreasonable at all to expect them to contribute financially to the home. They use electricity, water, oil, etc., and all those cost money.

I also don't think it's bad that you do their laundry. I did my parents' laundry, and my mom would do mine if it was in the basement at laundry time. But if they are not apreciative of that, then I would stop. JMO.

ETA: When I moved out, my parents gave me all the money I paid back. They were "saving" it for me. They did the same for my younger sister.

 

[chrisn]

My DD will be 22 in two weeks. She still lives at home (I think). She has a good part time job in her profession and still goes to school. She gives us $200 per month. This covers her car payment (Saturn), and her part of the insurance and cell phone bill. We pay half of her tuition and she pays the other half. When she was a full time student, we paid all of her tuition and we did not expect her to give us anything. I would not expect her to give us a lot (unless she was like 25 and making serious bank with no responso), but I do think it's good and teaches them how to be responsible adults. Her bedroom and bath are in the basement and I do not clean her area anymore. I will do her laundry if it's in the laundry room and I'm throwing in wash anyway. If she lacks at anything, I would say it's housework, but mostly because she is just hardly ever home. She has no problem with giving us money at all. She's a good girl! We are very blessed.

On a side note, we do pay all of her vacation expenses wherever we go.