Do you think "I'm going on a diet next week" is a valid excuse?

[sparklynails23]

If you thought the two of you were friends, you are not. If she can't go to a birthday and stick to a diet, no weight loss will last.

 

[SaraJayne]

I think maybe you should have accepted her "excuse" gracefully whether it is true or not. It did not have to turn into this drama about the diet. Sorry you feel put out and I hope you have a nice party.

Agreed.

"No" is a complete sentence and you (OP) deserved no more explanation.

 

[disykat]

Another vote for she has every right to turn down your invitation for whatever reason she chooses. You don't get a vote on whether her reason was valid. You certainly don't have a right to demand she give you a better reason. I think starting a fight with her was your doing not hers.

 

[Swan4Me]

I know people on the MediFast diet and they are FANATICS!!

Good for them.....

HOWEVER-this is a "milestone" birthday and they should have come and ate a friggin salad...geesh.
This is the husband's MOTHER -right?

 

[tarheel618]

I think your response to her was out of line when you questioned her reason for declining. Yes, it is a valid excuse and it sounds like she was right when she said you had an attitude.

Sorry but I agree with this poster. I think you opened the Drama door.

 

[Allison]

I know people on the MediFast diet and they are FANATICS!!

Good for them.....

HOWEVER-this is a "milestone" birthday and they should have come and ate a friggin salad...geesh.
This is the husband's MOTHER -right?

Not sure that it is. The OP says it is her mom and she doesn't have friends other than the OP and her husband. It sounds like the sister in law could be the OP's husband's sibling. If that is the case, they are not related to the OP's mom.

 

[kirstenb1]

Do nothing, it's clear she has no interest in going and at this point do you really want her there anyways? She is cleary jelous you lost weight and she is still "dieting". A diet is no reason not to attend a luncheon. Like you said she could have soup, salad or simply a drink. Just because you are invited out somewhere doesn't mean you have to eat a boatload of junk and break your diet. It was just an excuse like you already knew it was.

 

[ols386]

If there are no issues between your mother and your SIL, then the SIL sounds pretty selfish, especially considering this is a milestone birthday for your mother, and that she has recently had health issues.

Probably best that the SIL won't be at the party. She sure sounds like a drag, and with her attitude, she might very well ruin it for everyone else there.

 

[ols386]

Agreed.

"No" is a complete sentence and you (OP) deserved no more explanation.

A little sensitivity might have been nice, coming from the SIL.

 

[Allison]

If there are no issues between your mother and your SIL, then the SIL sounds pretty selfish, especially considering this is a milestone birthday for your mother, and that she has recently had health issues.

Probably best that the SIL won't be at the party. She sure sounds like a drag, and with her attitude, she might very well ruin it for everyone else there.

Why is it selfish? How well does the sil even know the op's mom? Maybe the sil attitude was caused by the attitude she got first from the op? Sounds like the op made some pretty rude comments.

 

[Gigi22]

Well done, OP--I think you will be a lot happier without Miss PITA! Your mother's celebration will certainly be a lot more fun.

 

[SaraJayne]

Why is it selfish? How well does the sil even know the op's mom? Maybe the sil attitude was caused by the attitude she got first from the op? Sounds like the op made some pretty rude comments.

I agree with you. It is the OP's mother's birthday.

I wouldn't go to my SIL's (my husband's brothers wives) mother's birthday. There's absolutely no relation and no obligation on the SIL's part.

 

[tinker&belle]

I don't know how she is related? Sometimes when you are doing a serious diet, especially in the beginning, you have to say no. It sucks, but it is what it is. Maybe she has always failed the other diets because she has tried to please others and she is finally trying to make this time a success. I'd drop it.

 

[glasslipper]

Agreed.

"No" is a complete sentence and you (OP) deserved no more explanation.

She didn't just say "no" she added the I'm on a diet.

 

[shortbun]

Agree with this. It's a lame excuse, but calling her out on it was guaranteed to start drama.

Yeah, I think the arguement is your fault. She was just being honest and you didn't like it. You guys should have fun without them and for goodness sake, don't discuss this with your mother. It will ruin her day.

 

[crashbb]

Yeah, I think the arguement is your fault. She was just being honest and you didn't like it. You guys should have fun without them and for goodness sake, don't discuss this with your mother. It will ruin her day.

I agree with those who are saying this. Doesn't matter whether or not the OP thought that the reason for missing was "good enough" - questioning it (especially the way it was questioned) was very rude.

 

[SaraJayne]

She didn't just say "no" she added the I'm on a diet.

So what if she's on a diet? Maybe she wants to stay home and wash her hair.

She can say no and that's it. OP doesn't need an explanation for why she said no.

It's taken me a while, but I've finally learned that all I need to say is "no". If someone keeps asking (or demanding an explanation), I will repeat "no" as needed.

 

[Allison]

Yeah, I think the arguement is your fault. She was just being honest and you didn't like it. You guys should have fun without them and for goodness sake, don't discuss this with your mother. It will ruin her day.

I agree. The sil declined and gave a reason. The op did not like it and responded rudely. The sil again gave her the reason in response to the op's rude comment and the op then gave another rude response. No wonder it hit the fan after that.

 

[ols386]

Why is it selfish? How well does the sil even know the op's mom? Maybe the sil attitude was caused by the attitude she got first from the op? Sounds like the op made some pretty rude comments.

I would presume the SIL knows the op's mother. Sounds like the mother is the SIL's MIL. Does that make sense, lol?

Like I said earlier, if there are no issues between the SIL and MIL, then yes, I think it's selfish to not attend a get-together for the MIL considering it's a milestone birthday and since the MIL has had health issues.

Too bad the SIL couldn't take a brief period of time to attend her MILs birthday celebration. Selfish, IMO. (If indeed it is her MIL, and I thought it was.)

 

[glasslipper]

She is my husband's sister. She knows my Mom well. I have always completely supported her through all her weight loss attempts. What exactly did I say that was rude?