Do you think a PhD earns people the right to be called doctor in a social setting?

[mariolatry]

This is actually spun off from a discussion I'm embroiled in on another board I frequent. One of the women who has a PhD in linguistics was complaining that people did not refer to her as "Doctor" in her daily life. She felt that, if that was the case, then medical doctors should not be referred to has "Doctor" either.

My husband is an MD and does occasionally go by doctor. My argument is that it's more relevant in daily life to know who's a medical doctor. At church on Sunday, a little girl fell and hurt her head and they searched my husband out because they knew he was a doctor.

There is also a woman at my church who demands to be called Dr. Soandso due to her PhD in sociology, despite not having worked outside the home, published anything, or taught in the 7 years since she became a SAHM. Now I'm a SAHM so I know it's a hard job. But I don't know how much a doctorate has anything to do with it.

It just seems so pretentious to demand that people recognize that you spent years studying one subject, often something that's less than relevant to daily life. Am I crazy?

 

[katerkat]

In a daily setting, not so much. But I am a stickler for using it in formal situations, like wedding invitations. My mother earned her EdD and I think wedding invites addressed to her and my father should go to "Mr. and Dr. LastName." But then, it annoys me when people send wedding invites to my husband without his rank, which is the proper way for addressing them. If it's informal, it should just be his first name, but he's *not* a Mr. Lastname.

But, uh, no, in social settings we don't generally use rank/Dr. Just my invite pet peeve.

 

[princesspumpkin]

Outside of the professional setting, I don't think that anyone should be called by their profession. Doctor, teacher, nurse, senator, even President.

 

[NMAmy]

I work at a college so I really couldn't swing a cat without hitting a Ph.D. While students usually refer to their instructors as Dr. So-and-so, colleagues and office staff refer to them by their first name. As far as I know, socially, they're referred to by their first name most of the time, as well.

My uncle, my sister, and my cousin are all psychologists with Ph.D.'s. Again, while they use the title professionally, my uncle is the only one who tends to use it more socially (but he's 78 years old.)

Frankly, I would expect most people socially or at church to refer to me as Amy not as Ms. So and so. If I had a doctorate, I'd expect that to continue. It's not a professional relationship.

I've only met one person in an academic setting who insisted on being referred to as Dr. Last Name all the time. He was the President of the college and EVERYONE called him that. As part of his personal office staff, I was allowed to shorten it and call him "Dr. H." Most people weren't even encouraged to do that but we did since we were the ones who knew where all his appointments and files were. His wife called once and asked for Jim and it took me a few minutes to figure out who she wanted.

 

[Chuck S]

I dunno, maybe we should ask Dr. Laura Schlessinger.

 

[jrmasm]

It just seems so pretentious to demand that people recognize that you spent years studying one subject, often something that's less than relevant to daily life. Am I crazy?

I don't think you're crazy. My father, professor of 37 with a PhD, would correct anyone that referred to him as Dr. Lastname.

 

[MareQ]

This is actually spun off from a discussion I'm embroiled in on another board I frequent. One of the women who has a PhD in linguistics was complaining that people did not refer to her as "Doctor" in her daily life. She felt that, if that was the case, then medical doctors should not be referred to has "Doctor" either.

My husband is an MD and does occasionally go by doctor. My argument is that it's more relevant in daily life to know who's a medical doctor. At church on Sunday, a little girl fell and hurt her head and they searched my husband out because they knew he was a doctor.

There is also a woman at my church who demands to be called Dr. Soandso due to her PhD in sociology, despite not having worked outside the home, published anything, or taught in the 7 years since she became a SAHM. Now I'm a SAHM so I know it's a hard job. But I don't know how much a doctorate has anything to do with it.

It just seems so pretentious to demand that people recognize that you spent years studying one subject, often something that's less than relevant to daily life. Am I crazy?

??? Not getting what the big deal is. If they worked hard and have earned their Doctorate then they have every right to want or "demand" to be recognized as a "Doctor".

 

[DawnCt1]

if they have earned it and they want to hear it than they are entitled to it. dh is a physician but i can't think of too many socialsituation in which he doesn't go by his first name.

 

[oxfordcircus]

I'll call a ph.d "doctor" when they start addressing me as "juris doctor". what the dang! are we gonna start wearing our diplomas on our foreheads?

 

[Bob Slydell]

They've certainly earned the right to be called Doctor, but IMHO, if they're insisting that people in social settings refer to them as Dr. Soandso, it can be viewed as being arrogant.

 

[shovan]

No, you're not crazy! It's seems very pretentious to me. Formal invitations of course should have proper titles.

 

[oxfordcircus]

My father, professor of 37

I'm sure this is a typo, but it sounded funny. It made me think your dad teaches 37, as opposed to biology or english lit.

 

[vettechick99]

While they both had extensive schooling, it's just not the same. As I was growing up, my two best friends' dad's were professors at the college in town. I never once called them Dr. Lastname. It was always Mr. Lastname or even Mr. Firstname (a southern thing).

In a professional setting, however, it's definitely appropriate to call them Dr.

 

[auntpolly]

if they have earned it and they want to hear it than they are entitled to it..

You took the words out of my mouth.

Most people are rolling their eyes behind the person who wants it 100% of the time though.

A physician at a party once told me that he thinks it's insane that my DH makes more than him (no idea how he knows what DH makes) because he saves lives and my DH is in the business world. That guy wants to be referred to as Dr. all the time and everyone just thinks he's a pompous you know what.

 

[Jenn Lynn]

No one calls DH "Doctor" outside of the office. He doesn't even introduce himself that way. Seems a little over the top to me.

 

[Zippa D Doodah]

I see only two excpetions to the rule - Dr. Phil and Dr. Laura (well, probably some other celebs/talking heads you could squeeze in there)

I have a title and a degree that merits it (no need to share that here) but always suggest that people call me by my first name. Since I am a pastor some parents want their kids to call me by some title and I am OK with that too, since I recognize parenst are trying to teach their kids respect -so to some I am Pastor David. But to all the rest of the world I am David (erm, except here on the DIS boards where I am Zippa ).

My take on titles and degrees is that they are indeed mostly hard-earned, but they are not what should define anyone. And its sad when things like that separate people from others, as if it makes them better than someone else. My take on my title is that its just all part of the total packeage that makes me who I am. So everyone just might as well call by the name my folks gave me.

 

[Aidensmom]

I just address people however they want to be addressed, and don't put anymore thought into it.

If someone wants to be called Dr., its really not that big of a deal.

 

[jrmasm]

Crud!

37 years!! I meant to say 37 years.

Doh!

 

[poohandwendy]

LOL, I don't think anyone has earned the right to demand anything. If you have to demand or even ask for respect and authority...you are amongst people who feel you haven't earned it.

I think it is appropriate to use Dr in professional/formal settings, but not necessary for informal occasions.

 

[Bob Slydell]

I just address people however they want to be addressed, and don't put anymore thought into it.

If someone wants to be called Dr., its really not that big of a deal.

Yeah, but admit it, if someone came up to you and told you to call them Dr. Smith, you'd be as you did it, wouldn't you?