Do you ask people to remove their shoes in your house?

[va32h]

You know I'm looking at the bottom of my shoes, and they really aren't covered in filth. I'm sure they have germs on them - just like there are germs on all the rest of my clothing and skin. Germs are everywhere.

I wonder if there have been any studies showing that the bottoms of shoes are any more "germy" than any other part of the body. You can require your guests to take off their shoes, but would you ask them to wash their hands before touching anything in the house?

Perhaps you should also institute a ban on purses and briefcases, in the name of cleanliness: http://www.snopes.com/medical/disease/purse.asp.

Edited to add: I've been googling, and found this study which finds cell phones germier than the bottoms of shoes: http://blog.wired.com/gadgets/2007/01/cell_phones_fil.html, but the study doesn't look very in-depth.

 

[MushyMushy]

I think you have that backwards. A good host is most concerned with his/her guests' comfort.

That's the way I was raised.

I just find this whole topic a little weird. Let me admit first that I haven't read this entire thread, but asking someone to take their shoes off to enter a home has never even entered my mind. I have also never been asked to remove my shoes when entering someone else's house.

Why would you do that? I'm not judging here; I'm really curious. Is it maybe more common in areas where you receive lots of snow? Being from the Heart of Dixie, we rarely get even a dusting of snow.

I'm just wondering if it's regional thing, or maybe cultural? Or in wetter climates, maybe just more practical?

I agree. It just seems downright inhospitable to require somebody to remove a piece of clothing. I would no sooner ask them to take off their shoes than I would ask them to take off their pants! Geez, who knows where they've been sitting and all the germs on them.

 

[LotsOfQuestions]

For you, then, is it "You, you, you; your visit, your rules; Screw the host's home"? What ever happened to graciousness?

Nope, that would only happen if I, as a guest, demanded that the hosts put their shoes on or take them off according to my comfort level.

As a host, it is a well known principle of etiquette that you ALWAYS put your guest's comfort above and beyond your own.

Especially above any material object like a carpet or floors.

To do otherwise is rude.

 

[MM27]

I would never ask someone to take their shoes off when they came into my house. I would hope that they would wipe their feet though (there is a mat for that)

When my aunt and uncle bought their new house she would ask whenever we came over because they had light colored carpets throughout some of the rooms.

I remember seeing on Martha Stewart that she keeps a basket of slippers in various sizes by her front door so that guests can slip into something more comfortable when they come over and then they have slippers to take with them when they leave.

 

[1rockinmamato2]

I think it is much more important for the host to respect the guest's principles.

What ever happened to graciousness?

Now it always seems to be me, me, me. My house, my rules. Screw the guest's comfort.

It is about me, me, me. My house, my mortgage, my carpet, my rules. Like I said, I don't ask my guests to remove their shoes, but I sure am glad when they do. My kids drop their crackers and sippy cups on our floor, I'd like to think they aren't ingesting the crud off the ground where dogs have pooped and people have hocked loogies when they pick those items up and then put them back in their mouths.

And I'll never put shoes on for company in my own home. That's just silly to me.

 

[Nana Annie]

I think this discussion just points out how diverse we all are. That's one reason why it is so important to be sensitive to that diversity, and respecting your host's principles in their home.

I think you have that backwards. A good host is most concerned with his/her guests' comfort.

I would never be so presumptious as to ask a guest to do something that might bother them, regardless if my carpet was white, I had children crawling or I think my floors might be scuffed.

That is what vacuums, carpet cleaners and swiffers are for.

I am just curious - those of you who ask your guests to remove their shoes. What do you do at a dinner party? Women often spend hundreds of dollars on just the right Jimmy Chu's or Manolo's to complete an outfit. Do you ask them to remove their dress shoes in your house?

I can't imagine going to a dinner party in somebody's house and being asked to remove my dress shoes.

If I was asked to remove my dress shoes, I wouldn't leave in a snit. That is equally poor manners of the guest. However, I would never accept an invite again, nor would I ever invite the host to a function in the future.

 

[GirlWithSpunk]

In my house no.
But I have 2 friends who are Viatnamese [sp] and Japanese and when I go to their house we have to take off our shoes.

 

[lilyv]

The title of this thread is very misleading. It doesn't allow for a middle ground. Many, many posters (including me) have explained that while we choose to not wear shoes in our home, we would never, ever ask a guest to do the same. I don't judge guests, it's rude.

I also don't judge folks who choose to wear shoes in their home. It doesn't bother me, and I am perfectly OK that they do whatever makes them happy.

For some reason, many posters seem to "assume" everyone who chooses to not wear shoes in their home (and there are many, many folks world-wide who do this) are also going to "foist" this option on their guests.


Nothing could be farther from the truth. Sincere good vibes to all.

 

[waltskids]

DH and I do not wear shoes in our house but would never ask others to remove theirs. Some do and some don't when they come to our house and it's fine either way.

 

[Art Vandalay]

I think people sometimes put way too much thought into things that really aren't a big deal

 

[Mean Queen]

While I usually walk barefoot in my own home, I rarely take my shoes off at someone elses. A friend of mine has to wear special shoes for feet problems and was upset because a woman hosting a playgroup required everyone to take their shoes off. My friend explained she couldn't, so the host said she was sorry she couldn't come. After reading this, I think it's part the host was from an area where you do take off your shoes (plus, she's a clean freak with a white carpet) and part most people I know in Florida do not take their shoes off when visiting someone's home. If someone asked, I would be a little put off... especially if I happened to be wearing my shoes that make my feet stink.

 

[aprilgail2]

I would not WANT anyone taking off their shoes in my home. That is WAY to personal for me and unless you live here or are sleeping with me then KEEP YOUR CLOTHES ON PLEASE LOL. I would no sooner ask someone to remove their PANTS when they came in than I would ask you to take your shoes off LOL.

 

[Cool-Beans]

I haven't read any of the responses because I've seen these threads before.

I'll just say (again) that the rule is that hosts do not ask their guests to remove shoes. The theory behind this is that you care more about your guest's comfort than your carpet.

I do not ask people to remove shoes, even though I'm pretty happy when they do. But I do ask children to do it, because...they aren't people. Noooo...I know that kids are people, too. I just don't care.

 

[ChrisnSteph]

We don't wear shoes in our house (for the most part) and I would never ask my guests to remove theirs. I don't live in a museum!

 

[beagle744]

I don't ask guests to remove their shoes. For me, it falls under the category of 'don't sweat the small stuff'.

Just a note, my DH had his foot crushed in a tractor when he was a kid. As a result, his foot hurts unless supported in a good shoe. It would be difficult for him to visit for any length of time if he were required to remove his shoes. I suppose there are others who may need to leave their shoes on for one reason or another.

As others have said, it is your home and you should do what you're comforatable with.

 

[Dr.Snark]

We don't usually wear shoes in our house, but I wouldn't ever ask a guest to take theirs off. I am happy if they do, but could care less if they don't.

The only time I think it would be really tacky to ask a guest remove their shoes is if they had a medical condition that made wearing shoes more comfortable. If they explained that to the host and the host still insisted they remove their shoes or not come, then that would be the height of tackiness.

Here is Peggy Post's take on removing shoes:

Removing Shoes in the House

Question:
My clean-freak friend makes visitors take off their shoes before entering her home. Can I refuse if I know I won't track anything in?

Answer:
A hostess is within her rights to ask guests to remove their shoes -- especially if it's snowing or raining outside. If it makes you uncomfortable, bring an extra pair of your own shoes so you won't have to go barefoot. In fact, she should offer slippers so you won't be cold or embarrassed. That said, a good hostess should be flexible. If she doesn't know her guests well or is having a big party, she should suspend the no-shoes rule, at least for one night.

 

[Deb & Bill]

...If it makes you uncomfortable, bring an extra pair of your own shoes so you won't have to go barefoot. ...

She's still not saying to not wear shoes in the house. Only to remove the wet, muddy, snowy shoes and replace them with other shoes.

I've lived in several different areas of this country and never lived where anyone expected me to remove my shoes when I entered their home. My husband wears a built up shoe because one leg is about 2 inches shorter than the other. If he was expected to remove his shoes, he would have to hobble around.

I'm with the crowd who think a host or hostess should honor their guests and put the guests' comfort before their carpet. If I was asked to remove my shoes when I entered a home I didn't normally visit, I would think that would be the height of rudeness on the home owners part. And I would probably not return. Nor would I remove my shoes.

 

[Shannone1]

Here is Peggy Post's take on removing shoes:

Removing Shoes in the House

Question:
My clean-freak friend makes visitors take off their shoes before entering her home. Can I refuse if I know I won't track anything in?

Answer:
A hostess is within her rights to ask guests to remove their shoes -- especially if it's snowing or raining outside. If it makes you uncomfortable, bring an extra pair of your own shoes so you won't have to go barefoot. In fact, she should offer slippers so you won't be cold or embarrassed. That said, a good hostess should be flexible. If she doesn't know her guests well or is having a big party, she should suspend the no-shoes rule, at least for one night.

That's just what I do.

 

[msdis]

 

[msdis]

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