Do I have the right to be mad and what would you do?

[daisy2jae]

I run a family daycare in my home. I'm allowed 12 kids of this 12 I can only have 2 babies 11 months and younger. This is what the state allows. I moved into our new house Nov 09. I had the neighbor behind us tell me in June-July 09 (can't remember the actual date) she was told to ask me about daycare since they were expecting (6 weeks along). She was told I was the best person to go to and not to go anywhere else. (This was told to her by her friend who comes to my daycare) Whatever....nice to know she likes me as daycare but really we have a lot of great daycares in town and I'm sure she'd find someone great. We met and she said she wants to start daycare. I broke my own rules....#1 when someone wants to take a baby spot I require the first week to be paid to hold the spot $75 if they don't start they lose it if they do start they have a credit to start with. I didn't collect it knowing they lived right behind us and didn't think it would be a problem. I explained the rate of $75 per week and that includes everything (diapers, formula, wipes, etc...) She had no problem with that even though she knew she'd only be here 4 days not 5. (I have other parents in the similar situation). I have had 23 calls for a baby spot since. I turned them all down since I was holding a spot for her. Baby was born Feb 1st and I just got a call tonight asking me to lower my rates to $45 per week since she changed her work hours to only needing daycare for 20 hrs per week. I understand why they don't want to pay $75 for 20 hrs but I can only have so many kids. I also saved this spot and turned away 23 babies for her. Plus I could have taken a baby starting last summer due to my ages I currently have. But I saved the spot for her. Am I crazy for being upset that they want me to change my rates. How do I tell them no (they have another lady that will charge them $40). If I tell them no I have to live next to them knowing I mad them angry and they didn't stick with me. However I really am hurt that I saved this spot for them for months and now I'm going to have to try to fill it up. I refuse to have a wait list (stupid...huh) so I can't call anyone of these other moms to see if they are still looking. Very disappointed that now I'm in this situation. How'd you feel?

 

[CowboyCO]

I'd tell them the rate is $75 a week and that you understand they don't need full-time daycare, but you need full-time kids for business. Advertise the opening. Quality, affordable infant care is hard to find, so I'm sure you'll fill the slot quickly.

 

[minkydog]

I understand why you're upset, but this is a business decision. Why should you cut your rate for them when you can obviously fill the space with someone who will pay twice as much? Be gracious and offer to help them find suitable daycare if you wish. If they've found someone who will do it for $40/week (which I think is crazy!) they should go for it. Don't burn any bridges. Wish them well and tell them that if their situation changes you would welcome them to call you.

 

[FireDancer]

I run a family daycare in my home. I'm allowed 12 kids of this 12 I can only have 2 babies 11 months and younger. This is what the state allows. I moved into our new house Nov 09. I had the neighbor behind us tell me in June-July 09 (can't remember the actual date) she was told to ask me about daycare since they were expecting (6 weeks along). She was told I was the best person to go to and not to go anywhere else. (This was told to her by her friend who comes to my daycare) Whatever....nice to know she likes me as daycare but really we have a lot of great daycares in town and I'm sure she'd find someone great. We met and she said she wants to start daycare. I broke my own rules....#1 when someone wants to take a baby spot I require the first week to be paid to hold the spot $75 if they don't start they lose it if they do start they have a credit to start with. I didn't collect it knowing they lived right behind us and didn't think it would be a problem. I explained the rate of $75 per week and that includes everything (diapers, formula, wipes, etc...) She had no problem with that even though she knew she'd only be here 4 days not 5. (I have other parents in the similar situation). I have had 23 calls for a baby spot since. I turned them all down since I was holding a spot for her. Baby was born Feb 1st and I just got a call tonight asking me to lower my rates to $45 per week since she changed her work hours to only needing daycare for 20 hrs per week. I understand why they don't want to pay $75 for 20 hrs but I can only have so many kids. I also saved this spot and turned away 23 babies for her. Plus I could have taken a baby starting last summer due to my ages I currently have. But I saved the spot for her. Am I crazy for being upset that they want me to change my rates. How do I tell them no (they have another lady that will charge them $40). If I tell them no I have to live next to them knowing I mad them angry and they didn't stick with me. However I really am hurt that I saved this spot for them for months and now I'm going to have to try to fill it up. I refuse to have a wait list (stupid...huh) so I can't call anyone of these other moms to see if they are still looking. Very disappointed that now I'm in this situation. How'd you feel?

If I were in your neighbor's position all you would have to do is explain to me exactly what you did here. That you only have so many slots and if you take my kid part time you will loose a full time position because of the limits. I would understand it is a business decision and it wouldn't effect my relationship with you one bit.

 

[kathie859]

with the poster above. I certainly wouldn't lower my rate for an acquaintance nor would I hurt my ability to generate income by taking the child part time and charging less if that means knocking out a full time paying client. You can certainly decline to lower your rate in a gentle, non-confrontational manner in order to preserve neighborhood friendliness.

Good luck.

 

[Bluestars]

Your rate is already very reasonable at $75 a week. Especially since you provide diapers, etc. I would not budge on this. You don't need to have someone take advantage of you, and that is what she is trying to do.

 

[JessicaR]

Your rates are already low. You had 22 people call you for that same spot. No way would I charge $45 a week to watch an infant. Even if it was 20 hours.

You have every right to be angry, hurt and anything you're feeling. She did not do the right thing.

OT - My sister pays $310 a week for daycare for her 1 year old.

 

[Stacerita]

I wouldn't change my rate if I were you. When I had my DD in day care it was way more than what you are charging, and we paid for the full week even if the child didn't go the entire time. We also paid for holidays and 1/2 days. It was well worth it I thought since it was such a great day care.

 

[dislaney]

You have a full time slot available and you shouldn't have to fill it with a part time baby! Sorry I would find someone who needs full time daycare and also make sure I take a deposit from them.

 

[daisy2jae]

I was just really hurt that I held a spot and lost out on some really good families. He owns his own construction business. She runs her own hair salon. They wouldn't cut someone's hair for less since it wasn't very long? He wouldn't sell a house a little less if someone said they didn't need that much space but really liked it. If I would lower my rate I know they are planning on another right away so I'd fill my next baby spot with a part time baby. I just keep coming back to the fact that I saved the spot for so long. Plus I even turned down a old friend to keep the spot for them. At least I know they'd pay on time and I know they wouldn't be leaving their jobs. But really is it worth still taking them at a lower rate. I can't afford to go long without the spot filled. My DH's hours have been cut for over a year due to the slow economy plus he just graduated college. Student loans will be starting soon. Really didn't think I'd be dealing with this.

 

[laurie31]

Goodness, I had a friend who paid $400/month for daycare, and this was 20 years ago.

She worked 7on/7off, so she only needed care every other week, but she had to pay for full time, to hold the spot. Some 7on/7off people were able to "share" one daycare spot, but if you couldn't find someone who worked your opposite week, who lived near you, with a child about the same age, then you were just out of luck. And very very few people could meet those criteria. People who work part-time have always had to pay for full-time care if they are using a spot that no other child can use, even on the days they aren't there.

I'm with the PP who suggested you wish them well with the person willing to do it for less, and if you've already turned away 23, then I'm sure more will be calling you. You will fill that spot in a New York minute. They shouldn't have any hard feelings; it's your source of income - a business decision!

 

[daisy2jae]

I'm with the PP who suggested you wish them well with the person willing to do it for less, and if you've already turned away 23, then I'm sure more will be calling you. You will fill that spot in a New York minute. They shouldn't have any hard feelings; it's your source of income - a business decision!

I even turned away 2 calls this week. I'm trying to track one of them through who referred them to let them know the spot may be open. I just need to call the neighbor back.

 

[CuteAndFluffy]

I wouldn't change my rate. Just explain very simply and calmly that you had held the spot for her based on the understanding of $75 per week. If she has had a change she can either opt to take the spot for that amount or can find another caregiver.

As for feeling upset, I would try not to let it get to you. She's making decisions based on a whole world of changes and I'm sure is not intentionally trying to give you the runaround. I feel for her--you never quite know what you will do until the baby is here. I'm sure you can empathize.

At the same time, you are running a business and this is a business matter. Lay out the facts, explain that you aren't able to make a change and that there has been great interest in the spot. Be brave. You can do it!

 

[JessicaR]

$45 for 20 hours is like 2.25 an hour and that includes diapers and formula and wipes. I think you would be losing $ on that one.

 

[Jennasis]

You need to keep a waiting list so you can start calling back the 23 you turned away. MANY daycares have a wait list. Also, ALWAYS get the deposit.

Yeah, you have every right to be mad...but make sure you aim some of that anger at yourself for not protecting yourself.

 

[daisy2jae]

You need to keep a waiting list so you can start calling back the 23 you turned away. MANY daycares have a wait list. Also, ALWAYS get the deposit.

Yeah, you have every right to be mad...but make sure you aim some of that anger at yourself for not protecting yourself.

This weekend I plan I changing my contact. I'm also going to make a rule with myself that no matter who or why deposit must be paid to hold the spot. I also plan on keeping a waiting list. I just need to figure how the little things to make it work for me. (How long to keep someone on the list, etc...) I'll get it figured out. I guess a good night sleep will be good help. Tomorrow is a quiet day only 3 daycare kids instead of 12 due to sick kids, etc... Should be fun if I can get this call made tomorrow.

I know-hope they'll be understanding and cool but I still not looking forward to making the call.

 

[krcit]

$45 for 20 hours is like 2.25 an hour and that includes diapers and formula and wipes. I think you would be losing $ on that one.

Seriously!! I would be insulted that someone would expect me to care for their child for peanuts! I would call them and say that I held a spot for them and the cost is $75(which is a super rate) whether the baby is there for 20 hours or 40 hours. If they are not interested then I'm sure you'll be able to fill the spot in no time.

 

[Jennasis]

This weekend I plan I changing my contact. I'm also going to make a rule with myself that no matter who or why deposit must be paid to hold the spot. I also plan on keeping a waiting list. I just need to figure how the little things to make it work for me. (How long to keep someone on the list, etc...) I'll get it figured out. I guess a good night sleep will be good help. Tomorrow is a quiet day only 3 daycare kids instead of 12 due to sick kids, etc... Should be fun if I can get this call made tomorrow.

I know-hope they'll be understanding and cool but I still not looking forward to making the call.

Took me a while (umm...almost 7 years) to figure out the business end of running my business. I always thought the best of people and wound up getting burned. Now I'm a bit of a hard tushy and much less of a doormat.

 

[chloelovesdisney]

Don't feel badly at all. You are a bargain. The daycare across the street from me is $150 application fee to go on the waitlist, you never get that back whether you get off the waitlist or not. It's $500 a week for infant care there, so $75 a week is so cheap I'd consider moving to where you are.

 

[daisy2jae]

Seriously!! I would be insulted that someone would expect me to care for their child for peanuts! I would call them and say that I held a spot for them and the cost is $75(which is a super rate) whether the baby is there for 20 hours or 40 hours. If they are not interested then I'm sure you'll be able to fill the spot in no time.

This is what I feel and want to say...but I'm just really worried about hwo things will be as neighbors. I'm sure they'll be fine but we're not going anywhere. Plus her close friend comes to my daycare. I can only imagine how I'm the topic of discussion. Plus she works at a hair salon...syr but it's the place for lots of talk. We live in a town of 13000. I would hope she wouldn't say bad things about me. I worry way too much what others think of me. Something I need to work on!