Divorced and still living together

[snowball22]

Just wondering if anyone is divorced and is still living with their ex due to financial reasons(down housing market..etc) or for the sake of the kids. Curious to how this is working out for them.

 

[MizTink]

Just wondering if anyone is divorced and is still living with their ex due to financial reasons(down housing market..etc) or for the sake of the kids. Curious to how this is working out for them.

yeah, i've done it before. we don't live together now, but we have done it in the past.
it really worked good for us at the time.
me and my 3 kids have our own apartment now and it feels SOOOO good to just be the 4 of us!!
but incase you HAVE to live together, it IS possible to do it! just depends on your relationship. too much anger, bitterness, jealousy, resentment, etc.....could make it NOT work.

 

[MichelleVW]

Ugh...I couldn't stand living with my ex when we were married, no was could I have done it after we got divorced.

I think that if you can get along enough to live together then you should probably still be married.

 

[Jupiter&Wolfe]

My two good friends did this, somewhat for financial reasons but mostly for their two kids.

HOWEVER, their divorce was very peaceful and it was simply because they wanted different things in life and were slipping out of love. They were still good friends so didn't mind treating each other as roommates. They got separate rooms. While the kids were young, they knew their parents were not together but didn't have to split time between them and they could all still do things as a family.

When the youngest turned 14 they decided they were old enough to understand and respect the decisions, so the father moved out. However, he remained very close by and they still all do things together.


All in all, if you and your ex are fighting or don't get along, I don't think you're doing yourself or your kids any favors, regardless of financial situations. I think staying together after a divorce is for specific situations. But if you can keep the peace, I say go for it.

 

[smidgy]

be very careful! My ex and I were not living together, but we still hung around with the same group of people. He still came into the place where I tended bar, cause they were his friends, too. It didn't work out at all....


we remarried!!!!

I agree with a previous poster. If you can live together, maybe it's not over.
how about a trial "separation"? why go through the financial problems of a divorce if you're living together anyway? I wish the economy was bad enough when we divorced that we wouldn't have sold the house. dang! it would have been paid off by now!
oh well, at least we're together... live and learn..... I've lived it, maybe someone can learn (by our mistakes)

 

[browneyes106]

One of my childhood's friends' parents lived together for about a year after their divorce. The stayed living together mainly so the dad could save more money towards buying a small home. From what I remember it worked out ok. The dad traveled a lot for his job so he was gone a week or two each month.

Just recently I was talking to a friend who lives out of state. She and her husband divorced six months ago but are still living together for financial and child care reasons. My friend's ex is a respiratory therapist who works nights. He cares for their 2 year old son during the day. Their parents live in the same area as them. Every other weekend one of them and their child spends the weekend at their parents house. They are getting their son used to the idea of being with one parent at certain times. My friend is planning to a buy a home sometime by the end of the year. Her ex will probably move into an apartment or condo.

 

[bettyann29]

In past my ex husband moved back in with me for a period of time because he needed a place to stay at the time.. now it wouldnt work out because I am remarried .. but me and my ex actually get along quite well.. much better than when we were married.. some people just arent meant to be together..

actually my ex husband comes and stays at our house now when we go out of town several times a year.. to stay with our kids and to watch mine and my husbands house.. I know it sounds weird, but we all get along for the sake of our kids..

I dont think we would even communicate if we didnt have children together.. mainly because I dont think we have anything in common.. but I do think ex's can still live together after divorce.. but only if there is no anger, etc..

 

[The Mystery Machine]

My sister's neighbors did it for 2ish yrs and it was absolute hell on the kids.

They fought everyday and it was terrible.

The divorce became final about 3 months ago and the mom had 12 hrs to move out that day!

It was a great relief to the kids. They have 5.

 

[MoniqueU]

I have one friend who has done it for financial not relationship reasons.
I also have an aunt who did it so my uncle wouldn't run up anymore unpaid tax debt in both their names, she was done with him then he needed a heart transplant so they stayed together for that.

 

[flying_babyb]

I have a cousin with 3 grown kids who divorced her husband then let him move back in (they live in a NICE house, with a waterfall). Theve been living together for 8+ years now, still celebrate aniversitys and just seem happy, he was even allowed bck in her bed now.

 

[Disney Doll]

When DH & I first married, we rented an apartment on a very nice street in a nice suburban town. Across the street from our apartment was a raised ranch style house. The parents (a couple who appeared to be in their late 50's/early 60's) were divorced. The wife lived in the upstairs part of the house with her grown daughter, son-in-law and grandchild. The husband lived in the downstairs part of the house. They had a white line painted down the driveway...apparently one side was for the wife, one for the husband. In the winter, the husband would go out and shovel his side of the driveway. A little while later, you'd see the wife, daughter or son-in-law out there shovelling the other half of the driveway. It was pretty amusing to watch. Quite frankly, if I was going to need to be that petty while living with my ex, I wouldn't do it.

 

[happygirl]

a little off topic. My inlaws have been legally seperated for well over 20 years and still do everything as a couple

 

[MichelleVW]

I have a cousin with 3 grown kids who divorced her husband then let him move back in (they live in a NICE house, with a waterfall). Theve been living together for 8+ years now, still celebrate aniversitys and just seem happy, he was even allowed bck in her bed now.

Pretty much like I said before, if you can get along that well, why get divorced?

 

[OK!]

I haven't, but a good friend had to for about a year due to financial reasons. She said it was awkward as heck and she hated every second of it, but at least they had a little bit of (physical) separation; she had an apartment in the basement and he stayed upstairs. I can't imagine dealing with that.

 

[OctMtnWoods]

Just wondering if anyone is divorced and is still living with their ex due to financial reasons(down housing market..etc) or for the sake of the kids. Curious to how this is working out for them.

That's a question that totally depends on the couple.