Disruptive children in restaurants

[maxiesmom]

Out of all my meals at Disney World I can only remember an unruly child twice. Once was a screaming child at The Rose and Crown, and I think we all felt sympathetic to the parent, who was trying comfort them. Another was a child at Le Ceiller, and I really wanted to say something to the parents, but didn't. The child was allowed to stuff food into their face until they choked, thow their plate on the ground, and then roll around on the ground.

Still twice in 12+ trips and many many meals is not too shabby.

 

[ancestry]

kandb - I agree with you in theory but I don't agree with you for restaurants at Disney. Vegas perhaps but not Disney.

Disney is very family oriented and if signature restaurants were to prohibit children they would lose a lot of their patrons. Sure they may pick up some vacationing adults but they would lose more than they would gain.

 

[2 Little Mermaids]

I book ADR's for restaurants that are either geared for kids or already a loud place. Character meals are great but we also go to Biergarten, Sci-fi, Coral reef etc. Some place that has some thing to do besides sit and behave. So far it's worked for me.

 

[lilpooh108]

My 15 month old was cranky and tired by the time we got to Coral Reef. She started crying after appetizers, DH took her outside until she calmed down. I rushed through my entree and packed the rest of our stuff up togo to eat in the hotel room. We try our very best to not subject other people to our crying child....and I really appreciate it when other parents do the same. I don't think that children should be barred from nice restaurants, rather, it should be that parents should really use their judgment in situations involving meltdowns.

 

[jackskellingtonsgirl]

The worst tantrum we have ever seen was at Yak & Yeti. And a hostess DID go up to the table and tell the parents to take the child out. The kid had been SCREAMING for about 15 minutes straight, and it looked to me like the parents had NO intention of doing anything.

We have had problems with kids out of their chairs bumping into our chairs at Narcoosee's.

There was a family next to us at Citrico's who plopped a big old DVD player in the middle of their table, but at least their kids weren't screaming or running.

There was a kid at Flying Fish one night who kept having outbursts of screaming. He was far enough away from our table that we couldn't see him, but he was LOUD.

We stick mainly to signature restaurants, but it's a crap shoot. You never know where the naughty children will be.

 

[topherSC]

Thought I would add my two cents. I have been to Disney countless times and have eating in most all the restaurants. First as someone else had said Disney's first mission in life is to bring joy to children. Second Disney is a place for you to go and focus on who you are with.

I have been to restaurants all over the world and of all quality. I cant think of a place that I have been that I haven't thought wow look how well that child is behaving and I can same the same in reverse. At the end of the day is it the Children that are at fault or the parents. Someone just said the parents should judge what there kids can handle. But lets not blame the children lets not blame anyone lets enjoy our own vacation. Remember we could be at work instead.

 

[Pakey]

Back in the day, the signature restaurants were quiet and the menus offered very unique items. It was rare to see small children. Now they are packed, noisy, and for the most part, no longer offering original choices. It has went from fine dining to family dining and Disney is doing what they should do, catering to what the majority of visitors want.

I've only had one meal ruined by a screaming child but there's no doubt that the places are noisier than they used to be with louder talking voices, clanking silverware, etc.

I can't fault Disney but I do miss the relaxing dinners. My husband and I no longer eat at Signatures every night and more often frequent those establishments not on the dining plan (even though those are not guaranteed to be relaxing as evidenced by PP's post regarding bluezoo).

 

[eliza61]

We don't really consider it appalling behaviour by the kids, it's the adults who refuse to take action that bother us.
I love seeing kids at restaurants, learning about good food & dining etiquette. I just sometimes wish that someone would teach the parents first.

So it makes it really sad when parents simply allow appalling behaviour because unfortunately the only way children learn is to correct them. My dh & I joke about how it seemed for the first 5-6 years of having kids we never sat down together in a restaurant for more than 7 mins. seemed like one of us was always "removing" a child from the restaurant and a few times we even got meals packed to go.

I wouldn't mind if a few more of the signature restaurants went "adults only". I don't think it would kill business if one or two of them did this.

 

[BLTLDZ]

The only place where children are NOT allowed is Victoria and Alberts.Otherwise, kids are the rule not the exception, even at signature dining.I have to say ( I am a parent too) that I rarely have witnessed appalling children behavior in the restaurants, more often I see adults behaving badly.But maybe I am simply not paying close enough attention to what other people are doing.

I couldn't agree more!!

We are a childless couple that love going to disney (Obviously)!.
The children have never bothered me....I mean, they are children, and often unpredictable. It wouldn't bother me much.
The adults behaving badly, IMO, is unacceptable. They know better.

 

[jenjersnap]

I have to say in my experience, I am always impressed by how well behaved overall children are even in the fanciest restaurants on property. Sure, there have been a handful of times I can recall seeing a meltdown but by and large, parents handle this quickly and quietly.

Honestly, when you think how tired, overstimulated and cranky kids can get at WDW, it really is remarkable. Come to think of it, when you think of how tired, overstimulated and cranky the parents are, it's even more remarkable I'm sure there are moments when mom or dad wants to say, oh to h*ll with it, just bring me another beer

I've only seen a few meltdowns myself during our many, many TS meals over the years. I think it's like most things: people remember and post about the negative things they have witnessed and never the positives. No one comes back, reviews a restaurant and says "I was amazed how quiet and well-behaved all the children in the restaurant were!"

As a parent who has been taking babies and toddlers to signatures for 6 years now, I have had to walk one of my kids out of a Disney restaurant three times (it's always when they are 15-18 months old). DH and I took turns and it was, well, not FUN but fine ... and necessary, part of my job as a parent. One time, though, the restlessness was due to overtly poor service in which we waited for 30 minutes between courses and 45 minutes for the check (and the manager told us we would just have to wait until the server returned without offering to find him ). It is helpful that my kids are used to what is expected of them at sitdown restaurants; experience and zero tolerance breeds good behavior, IMO.

 

[heavytow1]

Lets face it the liquoed up adults are worse than the kids.

 

[Leota]

This thread is reminding me of going to dinner with my Step-Son's family & our 2 Grandsons.... Mom & Dad never seem to prepare the kids for sitting quietly at the table. When our youngest was little, we packed a bag of quiet-time toys (crayons, pads, puzzle books, books, little people etc...) Then when DS would start to get antsy, we would do an activity in his puzzle book or let him color, or worst case, get up & take him for a walk. We did this with him since he was a baby & he never melted down in a restaurant, ever.

We've tried to talk to them about bringing something quiet for the Grands, but they always seem to "forget". Then they get frustrated when the boys get rowdy. DH & I are at a loss of how to help them be more prepared. The kids are great when it's just Gramma & Grampa, but once we get Mom & Dad there with them, it goes downhill. They always complain about how the kids misbehave in restaurants, but they don't seem willing to do anything about it.

I think if they would take 5 minutes before leaving for the restaurant to pack a couple small, quiet activities, the kids would have something to do when they get bored. They are going to get bored, they're kids.

The other thought I had was that when DS was little, we worked up to fine dining. We didn't start off there. We taught DS to occupy himself at buffets & diners before hitting the big-time.

 

[BEASLYBOO]

I've been to Disney and Disney restaurants 30+ times since 1972 and really the only meltdowns I've seen/heard have been in the parks! It's amazing, though it's the supposed to be the "happiest place" on earth how many people/children end up being miserable! I think for the most part parents try to do what's best for their kids and the people around them, even if it doesn't always work!

 

[princesspeach]

I personally bring the digital babysitter along. I don't see anything wrong with bringing in an electronic device if it will keep the kids quiet and happy. We don't let our son turn up the volume so as not to disturb other guests, but sometimes just that little screen our his Didj (game) is a life saver.

I do the same thing. I let the kids bring there Nintendo ds lites and put them on mute. It keeps them from getting bored when the service is slow.

 

[BriarRosie]

I'm not intolerant of unruly children in restaurants. It's often not their fault if they're overstimulated, tired and hungry.

I am intolerant (just like many others who've posted) of parents of the unruly children who completely ignore the situation and don't do anything to make it better. That covers parents who don't correct their children's misbehavior when the child is old enough to understand, or don't take the screaming infant out because it would be the considerate thing to do for other patrons.

I think most parents I've seen have been considerate of others. It's those who let their children run wild who tend to get mentioned here.

 

[nbs2]

One time, though, the restlessness was due to overtly poor service in which we waited for 30 minutes between courses and 45 minutes for the check (and the manager told us we would just have to wait until the server returned without offering to find him ).

I'm surprised you bothered with taking the kids out for that one. Any sort of effort at ensuring a pleasant dining atmosphere is a quid pro quo between the parent and the restaurant. If WCC were to demand a child not be rowdy, I'd laugh - they create an atmosphere in which rowdiness is encouraged (I doubt they would want it to be otherwise). If the restaurant is unwilling to work with you, it is essential that you stand your ground - if the kids are melting down, the manager can: 1) find your waiter or a member of staff to handle the check, b) comp the meal, or c) deal with a crying kid. It isn't your obligation to remove a child for the restaurant's pleasure while being ignored. Any complaints by other customers would only have served to bring the restaurant to proper service levels more quickly.

As for kids being loud, I go back and forth. We haven't been there with our kids yet, and are managing meals to ensure maximum happiness for all involved. Yet, the place is designed and geared for kids. The kidless may still enjoy and participate, but unless Disney wishes to limit a product to adults only (V&A), the expectation should be that kids will be there and that kids will be rowdier than one might otherwise expect outside of the community. Any place allows dress shorts at dinner is too casual to call kid-unfriendly (I have a hard enough time with appropriate jeans). As a result, while I may expect parents to deal with unruly children in an expeditious and effective manner, my tolerance of misbehavior is scaled upward as appropriate. The presumption that "I'm dropping $100 and expect to have meals in peace" is absurd when one remembers that this very same meal would likely be served at 40-50% of the cost had it not been licensed by Disney and served in a free market situation. A $40 meal will get you Chili's, and the adult who demands supremely controlled behavior at Chili's needs to get out a little more.

Do I believe that other patrons should suck it up, no matter the issue? No. There is a point where parents are failing to observe basic social rules of decorum. When that failing occurs, it is incumbent on the offended party to provide management an opportunity to correct the behavior. Expecting the restaurant or the parent to be aware of your complaint without notice is an absurdity. Rather, notice to the manager should yield: a) resolution or b) compensation. I suspect that resolution will be quick and painless, as failure to act may have been simple inoculation - eventually your kid's complaints will become background noise. However, should neither be proffered or forthcoming, consider further options (complaint to park management, shaming through social media). If you want to take it up with the parents, tact should be exercised, along with a willingness to absorb awkward situations should the problem be truly unmanageable.

As a curious aside, of all the folks that have had issues, how many of have complained to management?

 

[si-am]

I'm surprised you bothered with taking the kids out for that one. Any sort of effort at ensuring a pleasant dining atmosphere is a quid pro quo between the parent and the restaurant. If WCC were to demand a child not be rowdy, I'd laugh - they create an atmosphere in which rowdiness is encouraged (I doubt they would want it to be otherwise). If the restaurant is unwilling to work with you, it is essential that you stand your ground - if the kids are melting down, the manager can: 1) find your waiter or a member of staff to handle the check, b) comp the meal, or c) deal with a crying kid. It isn't your obligation to remove a child for the restaurant's pleasure while being ignored. Any complaints by other customers would only have served to bring the restaurant to proper service levels more quickly.

That would be pretty rude and spiteful to other innocent guests whose meals were ruined. It's not THEIR fault that the server is slow, so why punish everyone?

 

[nbs2]

That would be pretty rude and spiteful to other innocent guests whose meals were ruined. It's not THEIR fault that the server is slow, so why punish everyone?

Because it is absurd to suggest that the parents of the kid should throw themselves upon the sword of ambiance control to pay for the failings of management. Patrons with a complaint should have brought it to the manager's attention. Either he would have spurred into action or allowed the problem to continue. Failing to bring the problem to the attention of the restaurant suggests the patrons are willing to make themselves the sacrifice - fallacious belief of martyrdom and all.

 

[Kim♥DISNEY]

For the most part we see lots of minor unruly stuff we won't allow our kids to do but rarely is it enough to impact our meal. We did though have a horrific experience at CRT for dinner where a child sitting in the table across the aisle from us came in complaining loudly about not feeling good and was shushed multiple times then vomited all over their food on their table and the floor next to us and along the way to the restroom completely spoiling the meal for many many people. It took quite awhile for the clean up crew to show up and you know what those folks just switched to an empty table behind them and kept eating! No one even took the sick child out and she did get sick again when we gave up on our meal and left. I think no matter how sick or out of sorts kids are some people want to get their money's worth and their enjoyment out of it and don't really care about the impact on others.

That is truly sad ...

It reminds me of last year with my 10 year old. We had a late dinner reservation at Narcoosees's and everyone was starving. Since my son was 10, he had the adult dining plan and ordered one of their signature steaks. We were eating with friends and he wanted to eat at the end of the table with the other children. Well when his steak came, I cut it up and wasn't watching him very carefully .... he ate it in about 2 minutes!!!

Well, after that, he starts saying his belly hurts. I immediately got him out of the table and went outside, giving my 2 teenagers and our friends directions as to where we would be, how to pay the bill and most importantly to remember to bring my dessert back ! We took a taxi back and luckily he didn't get sick (and went right to sleep) ... but my first thought was to get my child out of there and help him.

That story is so sad that the parents would put their "fun" before taking care of their sick child.

 

[jenjersnap]

Because it is absurd to suggest that the parents of the kid should throw themselves upon the sword of ambiance control to pay for the failings of management. Patrons with a complaint should have brought it to the manager's attention. Either he would have spurred into action or allowed the problem to continue. Failing to bring the problem to the attention of the restaurant suggests the patrons are willing to make themselves the sacrifice - fallacious belief of martyrdom and all.

I understand what you are saying, nbs2, and I would have handled it differently now though not in the way you are suggesting. I think I should have played hardball with manager: gathered my kids and prepared to leave, if the manager wanted us to pay the check, well, the onus was on him to find it! This wouldn't work on the DDP though because they can charge you after the fact. I don't think it is making myself a sacrifice or a "belief in martyrdom" to be considerate of other guests.

BTW, I have asked for the manager at exactly two restaurants my entire life and they both happened to be at WDW. Unfortunately, the two managers were indifferent and unhelpful both times.