Disney Wonder Sept 3-7,2006 Part 2

[JLSE50]

YES IT IS!!!!!!!! Any card we ever got from his family was to My Son and DAUGHTER IN LAW!!!! Pissed me off!

What would be OK?

 

[JLSE50]

I asked Tom and said "I Want to know the truth, I can handle it- have I done ANYTHING to deserve all the crap she is giving me?"
His reply: "No. The only thing she has against you is that your family has money/education and you grew up that way."
She thinks I am *better* than them and that I think that I am and so I will never fit in there. (She never even bothered to graduate high school/get a GED and never worked a REAL job in her life)

So somehow it's my fault I have an incredibly intelligenet (PITA ) father who makes a decent living? And raised his kids RIGHT? (I like to think despite my parental crap they did a pretty good job with me.. I'll eventually get a degree (hehe) and I can support myself!)

I just don't understand hating your daughter in law because she took your son who was coasting along and created the "American" family with him.
We got married (she told him was a big mistake to get married at all, not just a mistake to marry me) bought a house (they never owned their own home) and we're having a baby (she would prefer him have had babies out of wedlock)

So I asked him then if he thought what I was saying (that as long as she says crap like that, my child will NOT be around her- it will not hear those things about their mother [especially unfounded!]) and he said "Yes, I completley agree"
And then sighed.

i don't think she realizes how much stress it causes him. It's not fair to me and it's not fair to him to have to hear that stuff. Stupid lady. Stupid, stupid lady.



...okay. I'm really leaving!

She is jealous

Oh my gosh, she is jealous.

Now I wonder how much of what Lisa, Vicki and I dealt with (deal with) was (is) jealousy.

And if that is it, I now feel so much more sorry for my MIL than I did before. Since she died I have come to figure out a lot about her which makes me pity her. She would have hated the pity and would not have talked about the "issues" but I would have had more patience with her %^&¥ than I did.

Jan

 

[purplern]

Don't even get me started!!! Mine are visiting us Christmas eve (during the day) this year. I hope it's short & sweet and tolerable!

I will pray for you!!!!

 

[purplern]

What would be OK?

Skip the in-law part. Made me feel like I wasnt important! I was just an in-law

 

[LCTsMom]

I will pray for you!!!!

Thanks! I'll draw from that, I'm sure! I need all the help I can get!

 

[PirateCutie05]

Note to self...
before marrying a guy...make sure the mom is not a crazy nutball loon.

 

[JLSE50]

Skip the in-law part. Made me feel like I wasnt important! I was just an in-law

So birthday cards to
"Our Daughter"
would be good, right?

What to do about Christmas, anniversary and other occasions? They don't sell cards
"to our Son and Daughter on your Anniversary"
do they?
trying to be funny here,,,
.

 

[JLSE50]

Thanks! I'll draw from that, I'm sure! I need all the help I can get!

Prayers from Indy too !

What is the dancing blue thing in your signature?

 

[JLSE50]

Note to self...
before marrying a guy...make sure the mom is not a crazy nutball loon.

.
Good luck with that. :haha:
Some of them put on a good act but the Drama Queen shows her true self later
.

 

[LCTsMom]

Prayers from Indy too !

What is the dancing blue thing in your signature?

Thank you!!

It's a dancing blue banana and it signifies a frozen banana which is an inside joke on the Twilight thread about Edward Cullen. (Vampires are considered "cold ones" who have an icy touch.)

 

[LCTsMom]

So birthday cards to
"Our Daughter"
would be good, right?

What to do about Christmas, anniversary and other occasions? They don't sell cards
"to our Son and Daughter on your Anniversary"
do they?
trying to be funny here,,,
.

Be kind to each other. That's all I'm going to say!

 

[LittleBlue22]

She is jealous

Oh my gosh, she is jealous.

Now I wonder how much of what Lisa, Vicki and I dealt with (deal with) was (is) jealousy.

And if that is it, I now feel so much more sorry for my MIL than I did before. Since she died I have come to figure out a lot about her which makes me pity her. She would have hated the pity and would not have talked about the "issues" but I would have had more patience with her %^&¥ than I did.

Jan

Morning all, I'm being a lazy bum this morning and am enjoying this time reading posts .

Patsy, hug to you. I belive Jan is right, your mil is jealous. When my dh and I got married, he said gruffly, "Don't get divorced". He was going through a bitter divorce w/ my mil at the time and it made our seemingly romatic relationship hard to tollerate. The best you can do is win her over with kindness. Be better than her (which you already are) and with time, who knows, you two could be the best of friends. Give her time and a chance to turn around.

I've got three extra sets of eyes next to me. I better get my day started, have a great one gals!

 

[purplern]

Thanks! I'll draw from that, I'm sure! I need all the help I can get!

There ya go!!! Feel the force!

 

[purplern]

Note to self...
before marrying a guy...make sure the mom is not a crazy nutball loon.

 

[purplern]

So birthday cards to
"Our Daughter"
would be good, right?

What to do about Christmas, anniversary and other occasions? They don't sell cards
"to our Son and Daughter on your Anniversary"
do they?
trying to be funny here,,,
.

Yea or even if you write something like I dont like the in law part because you are more like family to me or something along those lines!! The in law part to me made it seem like you were only sending this card because you had to because I married your son so here's you card and your just an in law.

 

[purplern]

DITTO!!!!!! AND AMEN!!!!!!!!!!! Lisa!! Our in laws have to be related!! I like my Father-in-law and use to like my sister in-law but once she got married she turned into a B*t#H just like her mother! I like one of my brother-in-laws!! I hate the games too!!! and the snide little remarks and awwwwww!!!!!!!

 

[LCTsMom]

All I can say is BLECH!!!

 

[PirateCutie05]

Oh goodness.
They can't ALL be crazy?
I mean...you guys have sons...would you treat the women they marry like dirt?

 

[LCTsMom]

Oh goodness.
They can't ALL be crazy?
I mean...you guys have sons...would you treat the women they marry like dirt?

A good friend of mine is going through something similar (she also has a crummy relationship with her MIL) and now her DS23 and his girlfriend are expecting a baby. They've been together a while. She likes the girlfriend but is concerned that their relationship won't withstand the pressure of a child, it's a rocky relationship and she is ultra controlling of my friend's son. Anyway... she ran into a situation where she needed to stay with the two of them for a couple of weeks. She went out of her way to help out the girlfriend but not overstep her boundries. The girlfriend even commented on how awesome and unimposing she was.

I think there is a different set of rules when it's the mother and her daughter vs. the mother and daughter in law. You have a lot more freedom to speak your mind and tell your opinions to your own daughter....not so much with the daughter in law.

This is a constant topic of conversation between us.

 

[PirateCutie05]

Yeah I can definitely see your point. My mom always tells me what to do and what NOT to do but I just roll my eyes and go yeah mom uh huh. But if it were my future mother-in-law I'd be POed. My mom can try to tell me what to do cause she's my mom...she made me...it's in the mommy handbook. But heck if someone besides my own mom tries to tell me what to do! I'd give her a piece of my mind...