Disney with preteen attitude

[RN01]

I am planning a disney vacation for Dec 2006. It will be me, husband, and 3 daughters ages 12, 9, and 2 at the time of the trip. Of course since it is disney I'm hoping it will be the vacation of a lifetime! We went 3 years ago and had a great time. My 12 year old has had this preteen attitude for over a year now and I'm afraid it will ruin the trip. We went to Branson over the summer and she just about ruined it for us. Any suggestions to make it better? I really want to look forward to this trip.

 

[noodleknitter]

We have raised our children and taken in many foster kids. The only thing I have seen work for a bad case of teen or preteen attitude is spending more time with them. I am in no way saying you are shorting them now!!!! But, kids of that age want to spend more time with their peers and start thinking those are the primary people to be like. If you increase the positive time you spend with her, chances are that she will realize that you and your more socially acceptable behaviors and attitudes are not so bad. Kids forget that they love and enjoy their parents as much as parent forget the same!

Good luck!

 

[Mom to Jordan]

GEt her involved in the planning! Ask what is important to her. Where would be a cool place to stay? What resturants would she like to try? Try to plan some 1:1 time with her there. Maybe the tea at the GF with you or a late night with dad while you take the others back to the resort. At 13 DS still loves WDW. Remind her that no one there knows her and she does not have to be "cool" there. She can relax and have fun being a kid!!

 

[kellyg403]

I have 3 daughters...12,13,14 and right now living with them some weeks is a nightmare! That said..I do love them and try to remember when I was 12 though I swear I can remember every hit song of the 80's word for word and not my own phone number. I have worried about attitude problems too. I am going to sit the girls down and tell them the truth. I really would like for this to be a FUN and family friendly time and to remember we ALL want to do something special someone else might not want to. All attitudes must be checked at the Disney gates. I do plan a rewarding them for "good behavior" and am hoping this will deter some of the negativity. Though, I must say I have been pleasantly surprised so far with the excitement they have been showing. I think I have found that the more honest I am with them and the more I am treating them as "pre-adults" the more luck I have in keeping smiles on their face. No, I am not their friend I am their parent and I do expect them to behave as they would like to be treated. Not sure if it would help if you just sit DD down and be honest with her and find out if there is anything you and she can work on that would make the attitude better. You can't get rid of it but sometimes you can work with it.

Kelly

 

[Matt]

Liquor is an underrated help for the parents in these situations.

 

[kellyg403]

Liquor is an underrated help for the parents in these situations.

Truer words have never been spoken!

 

[staci]

I can truly say that growing up I never got along better with my parents than when we were at wdw. not to say we didnt argue there but we had a lot of time to enjoy each other's company too.

 

[tmt martins]

Liquor is an underrated help for the parents in these situations.

Matt you should never condone giving liquor to a minor But it does help them sleep.

 

[bettyann29]

Maybe by then she will have mellowed out a bit.. since its a year away that could happen... I know my DD14 was something else a few years ago and she completely did a 360 and she is like a totally different child now.. Much more pleasant to be around.. We do so many things together now.. We actually laugh together and talk all the time.. which I never would have thought would be possible.. Sometimes I think I have a different child in my home.. She was actually the one who talked me into going to WDW in May.. she is looking forward to going..

 

[pyrxtc]

I took my 11 yr old in October and my Dh swears she is not coming on vacation with us again! LOL1 It was a true horror. She cried and whined evry day unitl the vacation was almost over. We are not taking either girl on our next vacation and the 11 yr old will probably not go on the one after that cuz she does not want to miss school and we are not going to Arizona/mexico in the summer.

 

[Jynohn]

Is it an option to let her bring a friend? My son was absolutely miserable when we brought him two years ago (he was 11 at the time). He whined and complained almost the whole trip, he was only interested in the roller coasters and everything else was "boring" to him. It didn't help that his sister was only 4 at the time so we had to spend a lot of time catering to her and going on the "baby" rides too. My husband and I spent almost the whole trip separated, one of us going on the "fun" rides with DS, and the other going on the "baby" rides with DD. It was a really fustrating vacation.

Last year I let him bring a friend with us and it made a world of difference. They were old enough to go off on their own together as long as they remained in the same park, and DS was like a different kid. He had a great time, and we still spent plenty of time together swimming, meeting up to eat, fireworks, etc.

I know this isn't an option for everyone, but just something to consider. It really made a huge difference to us, and everyone had a much more enjoyable time last year. He's planning on bringing the same friend again this year, and we're really looking forward to it.

Good luck, and have a great trip!