Disney Planning--past brides help?

[Codie]

Hi there--I just got back from my planning session. My wedding planner is out on sick leave so I had a stand-in. I felt less settled when I left than I did going in--did anyone else feel that way or was it just because I had a substitute planner? Were you given anything when you left? I was told I would be given a print-out of our whole wedding "plan" but I got nothing. I also was there last Wednesday and despite a follow up email on Thursday I've gotten no response emails from FTW. I absolutely loved the floral planner--although I haven't gotten a final figure from her either--but the stand-in wedding planner was distant and seemed to rush us through our planning. She also didn't seem to want to accomodate much of what my fdh and I were wanting either. As a result we have eliminated the wedding cake! Now I'm full of questions and feel like I have no one to follow up with! Did anyone else leave their planning session feeling like it really wasn't worth the time/money of going to it?
tia

 

[ead79]

I will be honest with you--I felt pretty good about things in general after I left my planning session. If I were you, I think I would contact my Event Manager once he/she is back from sick leave. I would make a detailed list of all my questions and get answers to each one. What things were you interested in that Disney didn't want to accomodate? Are you an Intimate or a Custom? In the end everything will be fine, but you should put your mind at ease by getting answers to all your questions. Plus, if you want a wedding cake, it's certainly not too late to pick one out. You could just mail or email a picture of something you would like. It sounds like a scheduled appointment via phone would help put you at ease about the situation.

 

[Codie]

I felt like the visit with the wedding planner didn't accomplish much--she read me my planning packet that I had previously forwarded to my EM and confirmed the things I had indicated I did not want (like a staged exit and no throwing my bouquet).

The main thing that they would not accomodate (at least not affordably) was the cake issue...we wanted to only cut the cake for ceremony--just cutting like a grooms cake or such. This seemed fine with my EM and SM but this lady said that we had to have a minimum three-tier 50 person cake...that's like $700 minimum. So we just nixed it. I did pick a cake in case we opted for cake instead of a fabulous dessert--and I wanted to know which ones were the cheapest so I could know which ones to choose from--she told me I just had to pick out what I liked.

I'm a custom wedding...the other issue was pictures. I want to meet my fdh alone before the wedding party and parents and everyone and I wanted to make sure that my hair was done in time to leave room for that...she also argued with me over the timing of when I wanted to cut my cake (I want to cut it right when I come in before my first dance and before dinner--which is very customary in my region, but she kept telling me that I didn't want to do that).

Overall, it was just unsettling and I still feel like nothing is set.

 

[ead79]

Wow, I’m surprised they were so unaccommodating. I’m sorry to hear that your experience was less than it should be. Is there a way you can contact your actual EM (not the stand-in one that was so unhelpful) and address your concerns with him/her? I would definitely do that. If you don’t get the results you’re looking for that way, then I would move “up the food chain” so to speak. I would contact Jeff Ralls (head of DFTW) and address your concerns with him. I don’t know if Disney allows cake cuttings without having an entire cake, but I think they could at least offer an explanation of why not at the very least. As far as being ready before your ceremony, I just don’t see a single reason why they couldn’t accommodate that. I’m sorry you’re having a hard time!

 

[hmgolden]

When does your EM return from his leave? Perhaps you can sort out these issues when he retuns. There should be no problems being ready early, they just need to push your cosmo appointment times earlier. We took pictures before the wedding, and our EM just had me start getting ready an hour and half earlier. As for the cake cutting, Disney has definite plan on how they like to do the weddings, and they don't like to differ from that schedule much. If you keep pushing back, and make it clear you want to cut the cake before dinner, they will probably give in. They may advise you against it though. If I remember correctly, your reception is at ADH? They will strongly advise you to do as little as possible before serving dinner as by the time you do your entrance and first dance your buffet will be set and ready for your guests to enjoy.

 

[Codie]

You know--one of my other concerns I think where I feel so unsettled are on issues of the music being played for the ceremony and how everyone walks in and that sort of stuff...does that get figured out as we get closer? I guess I was expecting to have all the details ironed out except for the place settings. I'm an A-type get all your ducks in a row personality...so maybe I just have to relax and hope that my guy is back and healthy soon

 

[marn913]

Don't worry! It took a few weeks to get the "print out" (which is actually your first tentative budget and is many pages long.) The EM's don't do all of the charges, so it has to go through others before the paperwork gets to you. It will incorporate all of the details that you spoke to your stand-in EM about. You will also receive a separate itemized budget for floral and for entertainment/transportation. As far as your schedule goes, it really depends on your final choices regarding the budget. You will receive a schedule for the day about 30-45 days before the wedding that will detail all of the timing for the day based on services that Disney is providing. The real specifics (when people walk in etc.. needs to be decided between you and the officiant and then communicated to your EM so that it can be included.)
As far as their objections about the cake- The smallest sized wedding cake that they provide for custom FTW's serves 50, and generally is a three tier cake (however, it does not need to cost $700!) Ours cost $450 and was beautiful - we chose a simple cake with fresh cut flowers as accents. The EM's problems with timing may have to do with your reception venue and the kitchen staff. We had our reception at the Living Seas. We arrived at the end of the cocktail hour, were introduced and our guests were seated for the meal. Then we cut the cake after the meal and it was served. At the living seas the dinner is actually prepared off site and brought over from the main Epcot kitchens, so timing is important to ensure that the food will be as fresh as possible (our dinner was amazing, and by no means could you tell that it was not prepared at LS). You may want to ask WHY they prefer their schedule over yours, there may be a logistical reason.
I would as always keep in mind that FTW provides you an "Event Manager" - i.e. they manage the events as they occur wedding/banquet/etc. They are not traditional "wedding planners" who seek things out for you. They are there to make sure that your instructions are followed, you are billed correctly and they make sure your event is perfect. You actually do the "planning" end of it, so it can get frustrating. Good luck and everything will end up perfect!

Marne

 

[ead79]

Don’t worry—I’m pretty type-A myself, so I definitely know where you’re coming from. As far as what order people enter for the ceremony, your EM doesn’t really decide that. It’s up to you and your own choices, though there is a standard order. The standard order alternates between the groom’s side and bride’s side like this:

1) Groom’s Grandparents
2) Bride’s Grandparents
3) Groom’s Mother
4) Bride’s Mother
5) Groomsmen/Groom
6) Bridesmaids
7) Maid of Honor
8) Flower Girl
9) Bride

As another poster mentioned, Disney has Event Managers, not Wedding Planners. The details like what music you prefer are really left up to you in this process, though Disney does have a list of popular choices that they can provide you with. Don’t stress about it—it will all come together.

 

[Codie]

Thank you to all of you--you really have made me a little more relaxed. I'll probably post another stressy post closer to the 35 day mark You also put a great perspective on things--I never really thought about their title of "Event Manager" differing from "wedding planner" but you are absolutely right! I've decided to just relax (at least temporarily). I always set my expectations so high for Disney--it's really not fair of me

 

[WonderWomanDC]

You can ask your EM to send you a tape of ceremony music, and you can choose from that or look around online and ask people and choose based on what you like. There are also plenty of Disney tunest that a lot of people like for the ceremony.
As for the cake, my understanding is that for the most part they are not allowing a small cake to cut now, but that you can definitely get something lower than $700, as someone else pointed out. Just remember the simpler it is, the lower the cost probably is too. So a simple white cake with buttercream frosting and some fruit or fresh flowers would be much more economical than an intricate design with hand done sugar flowers, etc.
Why don't you tell your EM that you were disappointed with the experience you had in his/her absence and that you would like to have another meeting to go over details and do a walk through a few days before your wedding. Did you actually do a tasting during your planning session? How was that?

 

[Codie]

I did do a tasting and it was really awesome. I LOVeD our waiter and he will be serving at the wedding as well, so that was cool. I am going to hold off until I hear from my actual EM when he gets back from medical leave and then address my concerns...

 

[pouncingpluto]

Actually, haven't they recently changed titles... they used to be called Event Managers but are now called Wedding Planners?

 

[WonderWomanDC]

I think that yes, they are now Wedding Planners. But I'm not positive

 

[Codie]

Actually, haven't they recently changed titles... they used to be called Event Managers but are now called Wedding Planners?

I'm going to keep thinking of them as EM's because that makes me feel better with the level of assistance I got

 

[Fantasia Sam]

Wedding Planners/Event Managers I still call them the same thing.

When Paul and I went for our PS we had a substitute EM who was awesome and we came away a little disappointed that we weren't assigned to him in the first place - well lo and behold then our EM moved to another department and we ended up having our Sub EM we were so happy.

I'm sorry Codie that the PS ended up frustrating you a bit -that';s not how it's supposed to be. And of course you can cut your cake when you want - urghh I can't believe the sub you had was so dictatorial. Anyway fingers crossed that your EM returns from sick leave very soon.

 

[pouncingpluto]

Sam, I didn't mean people couldn't still call them EMs if they want... I was referring to this part of the conversation:

"As another poster mentioned, Disney has Event Managers, not Wedding Planners. "