Disgusting situation at the grocery store today

[YourMajesty]

If you have worked for a government program you would know that most of what is said on this thread is true. Just because these happen to be the facts in many instances does not mean you are not compassionate. I understand in this case we do not have all the facts...so it's hard to say...but the shopper wanted it to be known if she was raising her voice. Just because you desire for people to be responsible doesn't mean you lack compassion...it is possible to have compassion for people on government assisstance and it's ok to expect responsibility. As far as WIC goes the main goal of the program is to teach families nutrition education.

 

[Lisa loves Pooh]

http://disboards.com/showthread.php?t=1095167

This thread is currently on the Budget Board.

If many of these posters would lose their job tomorrow and couldn't find another one for awhile--and then had to go on welfare, I would think I was paying for their poor judgment.

We could all be paying for that "You only live once, I'm going to WDW whether I am in debt or not" mentality.

Choices, people

I read some of that thread--it seemed for the most part they were telling the OP to butt out. Even if they disagreed with the trip it was none of the OP's business.


I takes beaucoup bucks to raise a child. If one seriously waited unitl they could afford to do so---there would be very few procreations.

A child is not a piece of property to be paid for in full before acquisition.

 

[Nancy]

I takes beaucoup bucks to raise a child. If one seriously waited unitl they could afford to do so---there would be very few procreations.

A child is not a piece of property to be paid for in full before acquisition.

You said what I was thinking!

 

[katerkat]

Now you are making an assumption here . DH and I never buy the two or three liter bottles for home. We always use cans or the 16 or 24oz bottles. We only buy the two or three liters for a party. We must have out soda rules mixed up!

Me too - I find with the cans, it's easier to limit myself to one a day. And at parties, people tend to open drinks and put them down and forget - so much wasted in cans vs. cups!

In Washington, a child diagnosed as Failure to Thrive automatically is eligible for WIC. If it ever came to that, we would decline it, because my son's issues isn't a lack of food. But certain medical conditions, regardless of income, qualify a child for WIC.

 

[DMRick]

Everything must be ok now. Hope you enjoyed your trip to WDW

Ouch..was that called for? I haven't finished this post, but that one was felt over here, and I had to comment. I didn't see where this poster said she was on welfare and went to Disney at the same time. My goodness!

 

[DMRick]

Maybe some day we'll have to buy his dad food with food stamps. I can only imagine what the Hentobs in line behind me woulld be thinking. They just have no clue.

Not to worry..you won't have to imagine..they actually say it to the person next to them. They pretend to be whispering, but it's said just loud enough so that you can hear. You see the idea is to make you feel embarassed. And they can't just say it to one person..they have to make sure everyone in line knows you are taking advantage of the system. Of course I'd love to hear what they thought I was buying all that cool whip and ice cream for.

 

[Aidensmom]

Maybe the child was having a birthday party or something, where they wanted the soda? None of us know that.

Yes, there are people who abuse the system, but the vast majority don't. If you pay for your junk food for your kid with cash, does that make you a better parent?

 

[disykat]

You know what? If you make a scene at the grocery store that you can't feed your children and then use the only money you have to buy soda - you get judged negatively. Go figure.

 

[Sleepy]

I don't have a problem with people who use WIC, but 1 thing bothers me.

People who are new to the system and are given the printed list of what they can get, but refuse to look at it or the WIC sign that is on the shelf in front of the product to specify you can actually get that product with WIC. Then, they get in the checkout line with a cartful of stuff that won't ring up because they have either gotten the wrong brand or wrong size. It jams up the flow of check out forcing the cashier to explain what is and is not allowed. One couple even had the list in their hand at check out as the cashier showed them what was approved and what was not.

Then, you get the well seasoned customers who think they can cheat the system and they too clog the flow of check out. In Orlando several years ago there was a lady in a grocery store who was yelling at the cashier because she HAD to have that Carnation evaporated milk. Her kids would not drink regular milk and she had ALWAYS been able to buy Carnation. The cashier tried to explain it was not on the list and that was why the cash register was not ringing it up. She had to call the manager who told the lady same thing. When the woman left, the bagger just looked puzzled and said "Why doesn't she just get an extra job if she wants to buy brand name? We all buy what we can afford, not what we want."

 

[hentob]

A child is not a piece of property to be paid for in full before acquisition.

Sigh. This is not what I am saying. But I think you know that I guess I am a freak for planning for the financial aspects of having children. That is as simple as I can put it. For those who understand what I am saying, thank you

I will say that if you are on WIC or Food Stamps or Welfare, perhaps it would be a responsible CHOICE to put off having additional children, as you cannot currently afford to take care of the children that you already have.

 

[hentob]

Ouch..was that called for? I haven't finished this post, but that one was felt over here, and I had to comment. I didn't see where this poster said she was on welfare and went to Disney at the same time. My goodness!

Umm--What are you talking about

The woman went through some rough times and in the end, she was then able to go to WDW. I was assuming her rough times were years and years ago. I went on to say that I was not referring this particular poster's life. She worked her butt off and used welfare to help her get back on her feet, which I assumed she did. Hence the

I LOVE stories of people that "made it" I love to go to the Budget Board and see people that "get it". Even people that are up to their necks in debt that "get it" and start their lives anew. We all benefit in a way (economy) and it gives me a feeling for sure!

So, I think you were a tad premature with your My Goodnesses But I still like ya (If only b/c your little guy is so darn cute )

 

[Claudia1]

I haven't had a chance to read all of the posts but I want to clarify a couple of points.

*They had WIC coupons, not food stamps and they were expired. WIC is a wonderful program and I never look down my nose at anyone who needs help. In fact, I often "find" a $5 or $10 on the floor in the grocery line that I give to needy people ahead of me. They look at it as a blessing and I don't embarrass them by asking them if they need help.

*The mom made a big deal about the bad coupons. I'm guessing that the loud protest indicated that she was not completely ingnorant about the coupons. Dad did not bat an eyelash in the whole thing. Not one word was said about going back to get correct coupons, just about how does anybody expect her to feed her child if she doesn't have good coupons.

*They paid cash for the pop.

They may have had food at home, gone back to WIC, or done a million other things. I just relaying what they did and said in line.

Again, my OP was not about looking down on people that need help. We all do at some point or another in many ways. Bravo to all who volunteer, help, support, and have lived thru rough times to succeed!

 

[Lisa loves Pooh]

Maybe the child was having a birthday party or something, where they wanted the soda? None of us know that.

Yes, there are people who abuse the system, but the vast majority don't. If you pay for your junk food for your kid with cash, does that make you a better parent?

If she proclaims to not be able to feed her child---there is no need for a birthday party.

Needs first--and then wants. The scene wasn't "But we have my baby's birthday on Saturday"....it was "I CAN'T feed my child".

It's all semantics. Don't proclaim one thing and then do another and then expect sympathy for your case.


I understand everyone here wants to give the BOD. But do you really go around with that much optimism when someone makes a scene?

 

[DMRick]

I thought you were being facetious, as in..swell, you have nothing, went on welfare and went to Disney. Sorry I was premature, and you didn't mean it that way .
The cute little guy is my grand..and he truly is..grand that is!

I guess I'm still carrying over the experience from using the food stamps, and being on the other side (this wasn't a one time thing, this was several months). Maybe if I had been there, and heard this women, I would have felt differently.

Years of serving at our local mission, has also taught me that many times things aren't as they look. That guy sitting in with the mission guys, eating his meal? He may be "one of us", sitting there just to talk with the guys enjoying their meal, making them feel comfortable. Or he may be an engineer at the local GE, away from home for months, and lonely, and many don't seem to understand, that while the food is free, it's not just for the poor, but for the souls we serve. In the OP's case, the soda seems to be the focal point. I have no idea if she was picking it up for a neighbor, or if the guy with her was her neighbor and it was his soda. If she had just gotten those coupons, took the time to pick everything out, and then found they gave her the wrong coupons, or it was the first chance she got to get to the store and didn't realize they were expired. I wonder if she had hung her head and shuffled her feet, and acted defeated if the whole experience would have been seen different. Maybe the guy was a neighbor she had bothered to bring her to the store and she was embarassed. As many have said, we just don't know the situation, and while it's easy to sit here and armchair judge, we really, truly don't know. I wonder if I've ever been on a board, where someone posted.."Gee, she used food stamps, and she had tons of fattening stuff, followed up by steak...and she must have a dog, because she had dog food, but how can she have a dog, if she can't afford to feed her family, and it's my tax dollars."

Umm--What are you talking about

snip

But I still like ya (If only b/c your little guy is so darn cute )

 

[DVC Sadie]

Hello I am not talking about people like your boyfriend's father.

Is there ANYONE out there that understands what I am saying?

Maybe I am a loon and I don't know it

Hentob, No you are not a loon! I do understand what you are saying and I do agree with some people making very poor choices in life and then feel entitled to receive government assistance.

I think the most frustrating part about the welfare system is not the people who receive the help due to catastrophic life changes but the people who have chosen this system as a way of life. The welfare system was never designed to care for multi generational families.

 

[Marseeya]

Hentob, No you are not a loon! I do understand what you are saying and I do agree with some people making very poor choices in life and then feel entitled to receive government assistance.

I think the most frustrating part about the welfare system is not the people who receive the help due to catastrophic life changes but the people who have chosen this system as a way of life. The welfare system was never designed to care for multi generational families.

You're right about that. But when a person is standing in line at the grocery store, how do you know which is which? All the comments in this thread remind me of my own humiliation. Nobody at that time knew whether I was a third generation welfare recipient or that I was going through a temporary rough spot.

 

[sha_lyn]

The thing is in this case we know the woman complained that she had nothing to feed her child, yet bought all the soda. Sure we don't know how long/why they were receiving assistance, but I think we call safely assume her priorities are messed up if she bought soda when she couldn't feed her child. I don't buy the speculation that she was probably buying it for someone else.

 

[mickeyfan2]

I wonder if she had hung her head and shuffled her feet, and acted defeated if the whole experience would have been seen different.

For me I would have seen it very different.. If I was behind her and I saw the distress in her face when she was told the WIC coupons were not good, I would have paid. But when she starts with the comments then I think, "You knew they were not good and you were trying to beat the system." No extra help from me. If she had gotten to the register and then said to the cashier, I am not sure if these are good. Could you tell me. When the cashier told her no and she started to walk away I would have paid for her. For me it is not that she had WIC, but that she had the entitlement attitude.

I had a dear friend whose was getting divorce. I helped her fill out the foodstamp forms. I have taken her shopping and would pay for extras that she ran out of money for. And there are many items she sent me to get with a few dollars that cost way more. When I got back she would say did I give you enough. Of course she did and I gave her back the change but never the receipt. I think she knew, but was just thankful. Now she is in a better financial shape and when I run an errand for her she asks me for the receipt.

I am not looking for a pat on the back or anything. I just have great compassion for others who really need the help and none for those who take advantage of the program no matter how much they need the help.

 

[Southern4sure]

For me I would have seen it very different.. If I was behind her and I saw the distress in her face when she was told the WIC coupons were not good, I would have paid. But when she starts with the comments then I think, "You knew they were not good and you were trying to beat the system." No extra help from me. If she had gotten to the register and then said to the cashier, I am not sure if these are good. Could you tell me. When the cashier told her no and she started to walk away I would have paid for her. For me it is not that she had WIC, but that she had the entitlement attitude.

I had a dear friend whose was getting divorce. I helped her fill out the foodstamp forms. I have taken her shopping and would pay for extras that she ran out of money for. And there are many items she sent me to get with a few dollars that cost way more. When I got back she would say did I give you enough. Of course she did and I gave her back the change but never the receipt. I think she knew, but was just thankful. Now she is in a better financial shape and when I run an errand for her she asks me for the receipt.

I am not looking for a pat on the back or anything. I just have great compassion for others who really need the help and none for those who take advantage of the program no matter how much they need the help.

Excellent post!

 

[cardaway]

I think the most frustrating part about the welfare system is not the people who receive the help due to catastrophic life changes but the people who have chosen this system as a way of life. The welfare system was never designed to care for multi generational families.

Well said.