be forwarned, its long....
I'm embarassed that my kid would even think of doing something like this but....last monday DS(7) was playing outside (I'll admit that he was unsupervised in the sense that he was outside and we, DH and I, were inside. If he does not come in the house for a while, one of us will go out and see what he's up to) we've never had a problem with him wondering off or anything, he's either on our property or one or two houses up from our playing with those kids. DS will not cross the street or anything by himself.
well, last week he was playing with the little girl next door(she's 8 or 9 and in 2nd grade, DS is in 1st). well, we were getting ready to go somewhere so we went looking for DS. He's not out front, not next door and not at the next house. We are calling for him and get no response. Girl next doors mother comes out and she cant find her daughter either. DH walks up to the end of the block to another kids house (not a friend of DS but you never know). Not there. So after about 10 minutes of walking around the block, calling both their name (I was convinced that someone must have snatched them because my kid is not known to just wonder off), one of the neighbors found them in an old garage out back across the alley playing.
apparently they broke the side door to get into the garage (let me say the garage is in sad shape and the door was falling apart so i'm sure it didnt take much to get it loose). But I guess they threw a rock through the door glass to get in. There was a pink little girls type bike in the garage and some other toys and the neighbor girl admitted to wanting the pink bike so she talked DS into helping her. She claims DS broke the glass and He says that she did so it was hard to get a straight story out of either of them so I said they were both at fault. And now I found out from the girls mother that this is not the first time her daughter has done this type of thing (they just moved in a few months ago and she seemed like nice little girl).
So we had DS apologise to the people who owned the garage (who were very, very nice about the whole thing) and I let them know that we would gladly pay half to fix the door (I feel that the girls mother should cover the other half) and to let us know what they wanted to do.
As punishment for DS he is grounded to our property until the end of the school year, not allowed to go next door or to any friends houses. and I explained to him that was he did was very wrong and that It is the same as if someone would break into our house and take his things. and that if something like that comes up again, he needs to come and get a grownup.
fast forward until today, the neighbor kids are all out playing in the sprinkler in their yard and my neighbor comes over (she is the landlord and the mother w/kids rent from her) to ask if DS wants to come play in the sprinkler. I told her that he is grounded until the end of the school year. She asked if it is because of what happend last week. I said yes. She commented that my punishment is a lot harsher than the one her tenant doled out to her daughter. To me this occurance is a very big deal and not something I want a repeat of.
So I guess what I want to know is, did I handle this situation correctly? DS is our only child and I'm new to stuff like this.
I'm embarassed that my kid would even think of doing something like this but....last monday DS(7) was playing outside (I'll admit that he was unsupervised in the sense that he was outside and we, DH and I, were inside. If he does not come in the house for a while, one of us will go out and see what he's up to) we've never had a problem with him wondering off or anything, he's either on our property or one or two houses up from our playing with those kids. DS will not cross the street or anything by himself.
well, last week he was playing with the little girl next door(she's 8 or 9 and in 2nd grade, DS is in 1st). well, we were getting ready to go somewhere so we went looking for DS. He's not out front, not next door and not at the next house. We are calling for him and get no response. Girl next doors mother comes out and she cant find her daughter either. DH walks up to the end of the block to another kids house (not a friend of DS but you never know). Not there. So after about 10 minutes of walking around the block, calling both their name (I was convinced that someone must have snatched them because my kid is not known to just wonder off), one of the neighbors found them in an old garage out back across the alley playing.
apparently they broke the side door to get into the garage (let me say the garage is in sad shape and the door was falling apart so i'm sure it didnt take much to get it loose). But I guess they threw a rock through the door glass to get in. There was a pink little girls type bike in the garage and some other toys and the neighbor girl admitted to wanting the pink bike so she talked DS into helping her. She claims DS broke the glass and He says that she did so it was hard to get a straight story out of either of them so I said they were both at fault. And now I found out from the girls mother that this is not the first time her daughter has done this type of thing (they just moved in a few months ago and she seemed like nice little girl).
So we had DS apologise to the people who owned the garage (who were very, very nice about the whole thing) and I let them know that we would gladly pay half to fix the door (I feel that the girls mother should cover the other half) and to let us know what they wanted to do.
As punishment for DS he is grounded to our property until the end of the school year, not allowed to go next door or to any friends houses. and I explained to him that was he did was very wrong and that It is the same as if someone would break into our house and take his things. and that if something like that comes up again, he needs to come and get a grownup.
fast forward until today, the neighbor kids are all out playing in the sprinkler in their yard and my neighbor comes over (she is the landlord and the mother w/kids rent from her) to ask if DS wants to come play in the sprinkler. I told her that he is grounded until the end of the school year. She asked if it is because of what happend last week. I said yes. She commented that my punishment is a lot harsher than the one her tenant doled out to her daughter. To me this occurance is a very big deal and not something I want a repeat of.
So I guess what I want to know is, did I handle this situation correctly? DS is our only child and I'm new to stuff like this.
(and I'd have supervised play with this little girl in the future)
I think you handled it perfectly! You made a big deal out of it and it is a big deal. Now your son has learned that others may make bad decisions and he shouldn't just go along with it. I really think you did the right thing. Its tough, this parenting stuff, but I really believe that consequences for misbehaviours do help a child learn. 
