DH wants to sell our puppy :( SOMEWHAT OF AN UPDATE PAGE 10

[Mouse House Mama]

How hard is it to "watch" a dog? Make sure it has food and water and let it out to poop and pee. It's not like he has to stare at it all day or carry it around like a king. I don't get what is so difficult. The kids are even home so he doesn't even have to do that much. There has to be another reason. Otherwise I am sorry but that is the lamest reason I have ever seen for getting rid of a dog. JMHO.

 

[Jennasis]

Wonder if DH knows of somebody who is "interested" the dog...like a prospective buyer all lined up already?

 

[2BigKIdz]

Agreed.

If he TRULY can't watch the dog while doing his homework, and for whatever reason, the children can't either, then just crate the dog in another room until the homework is done. He's being a big baby!

I agree as well.

 

[Aisling]

If this were my husband I'd say the dog stays and you go. Sorry, no man would be telling me to get rid of a dog I (and my children!) loved.

This may sound extreme or even silly, but I agree.

My DH wouldn't let us get a dog in the 25 years we're married, said absolutely not, he'd put it out on the street if we got one, because he was afraid of the responsibility (like having another baby) and also vet expenses. I've wanted a dog my whole life, and my father said when I get my own house I can get one. Well, I have my own house (yes, shared with DH), but I STILL wasn't allowed to get a dog.

Well, 9 months ago, I put my foot down. I told DH I was going out and coming home with a puppy. I'd been searching for one without him knowing, and found one I fell in love with. He threatened me with putting the dog out, and I said "just try it" and left the house.

Two hours later I had my puppy in my arms, brought him home, and DH didn't speak to me for a couple of days, and wouldn't acknowledge the pup at all.

NOW, 9 months later, he is in total love with that dog, and would probably put ME out before he put the dog out.

He sees how much I love my Brian, how the pup has brought joy into my life, and is like my own child.

Give your DH some time, stand up for your love of the dog, let him see how much the dog means to you and that you'd be brokenhearted if you had to give him up. Show him that you take good care of it. I'll pray that he comes to his senses and puts your happiness before his own stubborness. Good luck!


It's hard to see since I took it with my cellphone, but this is my DH holding Brian while both of them watched a ball game. Yeah, right, he didn't want a dog!

 

[2BigKIdz]

All I can say is Wow!

My DH is so not an animal person. We have dogs because I want them. When we went to the breeder to pick up one of the collies we have now, my DH was so indifferent and standoffish , I found out later on, the breeder was having second thoughts letting me take her.

We have 2 collies , the kids and I love them to death. If DH had his way, they wouldn't be here. He's not mean to them and will feed them and take them out when I'm not here but he's just not into them (if you guys can relate) like the kids and I are.

Talk to your husband. Mine would never in a million years ask me to get rid of my dogs. We had 2 before we had these and when these 2 become old, we will have others. He knows its inevitable.

You just described my husband! I LOVE animals! My husband does love cats but not so much dogs. He does let them out and tend to them when I am at work. He loves me and knows how much the dogs mean to me. I have told him that he knew how much I loved animals when he married me so the dogs are part of the package.

We also had a collie that he was pretty much indifferent to for the 11 years we had him, but when he died last September my husband was heartbroken I think it made him realize how much he really did care for him. He is much different with the 2 we have now. Kali is crazy about him! He calls them his smoking buddies because they always go outside with him to smoke. He even allows these 2 on the couch and the bed which was never allowed with the 3 dogs we had before. He says he loves them but could easily give them up but I don't think it would be as easy for him as he claims!

 

[shortbun]

I'm wondering if your husband has ever pulled something like this before OP? He seems like he's enjoying controlling and upsetting you. My husband would never act like that to me, we've been married 21 years and have been together 28 so we know each other pretty well. We are a team; whatever one takes on, the other is onboard and supportive. We do not harrass each other nor are we unkind. Is there something else going on here? Is he jealous of the dog? Seems like you get more love and support from the dog; are you sure you want to keep your husband? I'm kinda kidding here but he seems like a mean guy. You could get more money for the dog than for him so I guess that means the dog is worth more-hence you're better off keeping the dog than the husband.

 

[Buckalew11]

Well I am always about keeping the peace and not causing waves so I'd say 90% of the time I give in about pretty much everything. About this issue I've decided it's gonna be in that 10%! I let him know that I was not selling MY dog, I love her and this is an issue that is very, very important to me.
He said "I don't know", and my reply was "NO! We will work through any weekend issues you may be having with her, come up with solutions, and we'll compromise on things if needed but I AM NOT SELLING HER!!".
He replied with "ok". So I'm not sure if that OK means ok for now so I'll leave him alone or ok, you win, we won't get rid of her.
Guess I'll find out but I am not backing down on this and if he does sell her without my blessing then yes, we have some major issues that are going to need to be addressed.
I am praying he sees how important this is to me and just sucks it up and deals with it...UGH, I feel sick to my stomach now.

See, I'm thinking he needs to see you put your foot down. You know, sort of like drawing a line in the sand. He didn't this pup a chance. First day and calling you...who does that???? I vote do not give in to him so easily. I wouldn't ruin my marriage over a dog but if I was forced to give up my dog right now because my DH didn't want her anymore, there'd be a HUGE wedge between us, that I know.

You know, "Love me, love my dog". It is that simple.

OP - Can I ask where you live?

You sound like me! I was thinking...is she close??? Could I babysit on the weekends? And seriously, OP, if I am...

How hard is it to "watch" a dog? Make sure it has food and water and let it out to poop and pee. It's not like he has to stare at it all day or carry it around like a king. I don't get what is so difficult. The kids are even home so he doesn't even have to do that much. There has to be another reason. Otherwise I am sorry but that is the lamest reason I have ever seen for getting rid of a dog. JMHO.

Wonder if DH knows of somebody who is "interested" the dog...like a prospective buyer all lined up already?

I was wondering that too.

This may sound extreme or even silly, but I agree.

My DH wouldn't let us get a dog in the 25 years we're married, said absolutely not, he'd put it out on the street if we got one, because he was afraid of the responsibility (like having another baby) and also vet expenses. I've wanted a dog my whole life, and my father said when I get my own house I can get one. Well, I have my own house (yes, shared with DH), but I STILL wasn't allowed to get a dog.

Well, 9 months ago, I put my foot down. I told DH I was going out and coming home with a puppy. I'd been searching for one without him knowing, and found one I fell in love with. He threatened me with putting the dog out, and I said "just try it" and left the house.

Two hours later I had my puppy in my arms, brought him home, and DH didn't speak to me for a couple of days, and wouldn't acknowledge the pup at all.

NOW, 9 months later, he is in total love with that dog, and would probably put ME out before he put the dog out.

He sees how much I love my Brian, how the pup has brought joy into my life, and is like my own child.

Give your DH some time, stand up for your love of the dog, let him see how much the dog means to you and that you'd be brokenhearted if you had to give him up. Show him that you take good care of it. I'll pray that he comes to his senses and puts your happiness before his own stubborness. Good luck!


It's hard to see since I took it with my cellphone, but this is my DH holding Brian while both of them watched a ball game. Yeah, right, he didn't want a dog!

While I do not recommend this, I have seen it work, LOL.

My dad was a dog lover but after losing one of them said "no more". Within a month my mom went out and came home with one. He was sorta mad, lol. Well, long story short, he loved that dog as much as he loved each one of his 3 DDs, And when she died, he cried like a baby in my arms. I'd never, ever seen my dad that sad before in my life. I know that was why he didn't want another (because it hurts to lose one) but the reality their joy in life is worth the pain in death.

22 years I asked for a dog (a smaill dog) No way. We were newly weds. No way, no how. He was never having a wimpy small dog.

In 22 years of marriage, we have had 2 small dogs. He's loved both of them like children. Right now, he is asleep with the dog cuddled up as close as she can get to him.
I didn't go out and buy either dog. One was a stray and one was a 3yo giveaway.
How those people ever, ever gave that little dog away is beyond me.

OP, dogs are expensive and a lot of work but the joy they give is worth so much more than those costs. I really hope you can work this out with your DH. I think he needs to know exactly how much this means to you. While you both need to give and take, he needs to be aware of how this is hurting your heart. And that's what make this different IMHO. You already love the little dog.

I need to go back to page one and see if I can fid out how much this dog cost.

 

[Buckalew11]

Ok, so they are expensive but I do not know how much. How much could be making him feel buyer's remorse?

 

[CathrynRose]

Ok, so they are expensive but I do not know how much. How much could be making him feel buyer's remorse?

If it's a full bred english bulldog? Probably around $2000.

OP - where did you get this puppy?

 

[roliepolieoliefan]

Ok, so they are expensive but I do not know how much. How much could be making him feel buyer's remorse?

French bulldogs are what about $1200.00?

 

[CathrynRose]

French bulldogs are what about $1200.00?

Is it French or English?

**I lovvvve French Bulldogs***

 

[roliepolieoliefan]

Is it French or English?

**I lovvvve French Bulldogs***

Sorry CR you are right. Just read the original post. Not sure how much english bulldogs are.

I love Frenchies too, aren't those ears the cutest?

 

[Disneyadore]

I think the OP got a more serious problem then the puppy.
Her husband tries to "command" her and if she gives in the end effect will be he will always bully her.
This isn't about the puppy,this is about :" I'm the boss and you have to obey me".

 

[roliepolieoliefan]

If it's a full bred english bulldog? Probably around $2000.

OP - where did you get this puppy?

This raises another question. A reputable breeder would have definetly sold with a limited registration so the puppy could not have been resold and bred plus the breeder would definetly have in the contract to give it back and not sell it to a 3rd party, in the 1st place.

At least this has been my experience.

 

[Buckalew11]

That's a lot of $$$. But see, once you fall in love, you wouldn't take a million dollars for your dog. At least I wouldn't.

I really hope she can work this out. It just makes me sad to think of someone feeling forced to give up their dog.

 

[Buckalew11]

This raises another question. A reputable breeder would have definetly sold with a limited registration so the puppy could not have been resold and bred plus the breeder would definetly have in the contract to give it back and not sell it to a 3rd party, in the 1st place.

At least this has been my experience.

Yeah, sort of like DVC's ROFR.

 

[CathrynRose]

I love Frenchies too, aren't those ears the cutest?

Yessss! Awwww Love 'em!

Sometimes Charley will be sleeping and his ear will go up like that, makes me laugh:

This raises another question. A reputable breeder would have definetly sold with a limited registration so the puppy could not have been resold and bred plus the breeder would definetly have in the contract to give it back and not sell it to a 3rd party, in the 1st place.

At least this has been my experience.

That's what I thought, too.


I dunno... this whole thing is sad. The giving up a dog, the wife being this upset about it, yuck to the whole thing.

 

[muffyn]

OP here,
. Then BAM, he IMs or emails me the usual, I can't do this, its too much email.

:

ok tell him he would certainly have more time if he QUIT sending you IM's & emails!!!!!

look into doggy day care, like others have said. I know it would cost you probably an hours worth of pay each day, but could be a marraige & puppy saver! (our local kennels charges $8 for a half day).

I absolutely love /english bulldogs.. I am envious.

I think though you need to fathom out just what about watching your puppy is bothering him, she can't be that much of a bother. old enough to spend time in a crate, take it out every few hours.

 

[Planogirl]

You know something? This is just pathetic. Our much loved cat of many years got out and completely disappeared a week ago and it just enrages me to see someone casting off a pet so lightly. I would give anything to have ours back so this makes me ill.

I hope that you resolve this.

 

[FayeW]

Sounds like the OP may be married to my husband. He flakes on all the big decisions, also, but since we've been married nearly 20 yrs, I at least have figured out why.

The reality is, my husband doesn't want to make any decisions. He would rather waffle, or be the voice of dissention, so that when/if it all falls apart he can point his finger at me and say "you did this...this was your decision. I was against it, remember?" That's his M.O.

So now when there is something we are considering, I have to do the Jedi Mind Trick on him and make him think it's his own idea. My friends get quite a kick out of it. Me, not so much. I think it's pretty childish but you gotta do what you gotta do. Otherwise, no decisions would ever get made around here.