DH dropped a bombshell on me Sunday night..

[Dax]

So we had a rare Sunday night together the other night, and as we were winding down the night to go to bed, DH asked me if I had given anymore thought to having a child...

I thought DH and I had decided to not have children. We both figured it was what we wanted, and we were OK with it. I am going to be 33, and he just hit 33, we had always said it it didnt happen by 30, then we were not going to try. Thats not to say my biological clock hasnt ticked from time to time..but usually we both are OK with the decisions..

Well it seems DH still wants a child...and honestly, I do too...I must say, all the talk got my clock ticking full speed, and I can think of nothing else...of course we have a lot of "logistics" to work through, but the possibility is there...

Has anyone else been "child free" and made the switch...I am confused and excited..I have been on the pill for over 10yrs, so I wonder if that will cause any issues too..but I welcome some 3rd party support..

 

[Ohiodislover]

My sister will be 35 this year. She had always said she never wanted children, and had always been the cool, carefree aunt to my and my other sister's children. Her life seemed to be everything she wanted it to be. Great career, and fun times.

Well last year she married, bought a house, and had a baby girl 6 months ago. She is happier than she ever thought possible, and just glows.

Good luck with your decision.

 

[mhsjax]

Oh I so know exactly where you are. DH and I had pretty much determined that we would not have kids. We both worked, he traveled on airlines for free at the time and we didn't want kids to get in the way of that.

I was about 33 at the time also. Now I am 47. We have DS13, DD11 and DS9. I can't imagine my life without them.

As far as being on the pill for so long, usually it helps. It regulated me, I was all over the place. AFter being on the pill for about 13 years I got pregnant VERY easily. Not saying this is true for everyone, but it was for me.

Like I said, it was a complete turn around for us, I am now a SAHM and I love it. I wouldn't have it any other way.

 

[abdmom]

I had my first child at 32. I had been on the pill longer than you. Got pregnant right away after going off. Second child at 34 - third at 41. Thirty-two was much easier than 41. Good luck.

 

[sunnyday123]

My Aunt was child free until she was 40, and up until she got pregnant ( wasn't trying ) was adamant about not having children.

She passed away at 48, but you would have thought she invented having children, she talked so much about how wonderful it was! She said her biggest regret was not having more and earlier and told everyone they should have told her how great it was!


I have to say, there is nothing in the world that compares to your baby call you Mommy for the first time. Good luck with your decision.

 

[MerMom60_94]

We were 34 and 37 and married for 11 years before we had DD. We were always back and forth on whether to have children. Finally, we reached the point you are at (now or never). I had been on the pill my entire adult life and thought it would take awhile to succeed but, once we decided to try, was pregnant two months later. Let me just say, the past 15 (almost 16) years of my life have been the absolute best years. Like Sunnyday123's aunt, I just wish I had started sooner and had more. Having a child has allowed me to relive my life through a child's eyes. You know all those things you stop doing when you reach adulthood? When you have a child you get to do them all again (sledding in the snow, making snow angels, making sand castles at the beach, bringing your child around the neighborhood at Halloween). It is an absolute trip!

Good luck with your decision.

 

[emer95]

I just wanted to wish you the best! Being a Mom has been the most wonderful blessing of my life. I'm so excited for you and I hope it happens really quickly. God bless you!

 

[Liberty Belle]

So we had a rare Sunday night together the other night, and as we were winding down the night to go to bed, DH asked me if I had given anymore thought to having a child...

I thought DH and I had decided to not have children. We both figured it was what we wanted, and we were OK with it. I am going to be 33, and he just hit 33, we had always said it it didnt happen by 30, then we were not going to try. Thats not to say my biological clock hasnt ticked from time to time..but usually we both are OK with the decisions..

Well it seems DH still wants a child...and honestly, I do too...I must say, all the talk got my clock ticking full speed, and I can think of nothing else...of course we have a lot of "logistics" to work through, but the possibility is there...

Has anyone else been "child free" and made the switch...I am confused and excited..I have been on the pill for over 10yrs, so I wonder if that will cause any issues too..but I welcome some 3rd party support..

Aww. That makes me teary. Probably because being a mom is the most wonderful thing in the world to me.

My friend was adamant she didn't want children. When she was around 30, she changed her mind and has a wonderful daughter who is just starting college.

My niece is only 23, but she's always maintained she didn't want kids. She's now told us (to my mother's delight) that she's changing her mind and she does want to have children someday.

I've always known I wanted kids. My life is child-centered, since I also work with them. That's just who I am. I honestly feel I was born to be around children.

 

[DawnCt1]

So we had a rare Sunday night together the other night, and as we were winding down the night to go to bed, DH asked me if I had given anymore thought to having a child...

I thought DH and I had decided to not have children. We both figured it was what we wanted, and we were OK with it. I am going to be 33, and he just hit 33, we had always said it it didnt happen by 30, then we were not going to try. Thats not to say my biological clock hasnt ticked from time to time..but usually we both are OK with the decisions..

Well it seems DH still wants a child...and honestly, I do too...I must say, all the talk got my clock ticking full speed, and I can think of nothing else...of course we have a lot of "logistics" to work through, but the possibility is there...

Has anyone else been "child free" and made the switch...I am confused and excited..I have been on the pill for over 10yrs, so I wonder if that will cause any issues too..but I welcome some 3rd party support..

Everyone expecting their first child. Talk to your gynecologist about it as well as other "health initiatives" you can begin before conception.

 

[Shmily1]

My coworker is now 44 and has a 3 year old. She can't imagine not having the little one. I'm 42 and have two in college so we are total opposites there!

If you love children, don't mind sacrificing your sleep, money, and time, then go for it!! Keep in mind that you will never again have those three things but the hugs you get back will be so worth it!!

Good luck!!!

 

[cybrkitn]

My aunt who is 11 years older than I am had. Her and her DH decided they didn't want children. She got pregnant then had a miscarriage . It was at that point they changed their minds and decided to have children.

She was pregnant with her DD at age 41 and in her last trimester, while I was pregnant with DS and in my first trimester. My cousin and DS8 are 6 months apart from each other.

Since then, they have had another child, a boy and are very happy.

 

[WDWorBUST]

DH and I were married 8 years before we had our first. I was 29 with her and am 36 this time around. We always knew we wanted kids, it was just trying to find the right time. Having children is absolutely amazing and I wouldn't change it for the world. Is it life-changing - oh my yes! But it really is worth all the sacrifices.

 

[AKL_Megs]

We are 28 and have "decided" to be child-free... only because my husband can retire early, and we want to move to Florida. But...

... Every once in a while, I can tell we both really want ONE child. This might be TMI (sorry, don't look if you don't want to), but Aunt Flo came to town last this month, and my husband said to me, "So, no baby?" We weren't trying, but it just struck me that he would even say that. (I'm no better... I already know how I would decorate a baby's room, and what I would name it! )

I can totally feel where you are coming from!

 

[EllenFrasier]

So we had a rare Sunday night together the other night, and as we were winding down the night to go to bed, DH asked me if I had given anymore thought to having a child...

I thought DH and I had decided to not have children. We both figured it was what we wanted, and we were OK with it. I am going to be 33, and he just hit 33, we had always said it it didnt happen by 30, then we were not going to try. Thats not to say my biological clock hasnt ticked from time to time..but usually we both are OK with the decisions..

Well it seems DH still wants a child...and honestly, I do too...I must say, all the talk got my clock ticking full speed, and I can think of nothing else...of course we have a lot of "logistics" to work through, but the possibility is there...

Has anyone else been "child free" and made the switch...I am confused and excited..I have been on the pill for over 10yrs, so I wonder if that will cause any issues too..but I welcome some 3rd party support..

Well, I must say the decision to have children after being childless is much easier than deciding to be childless after having children!
We have five children, with the youngest being 11 and the oldest being 22, and I can tell you there were times when I said to my husband "why did we have children?".....All I can say is be sure this is what you want before diving in - there is no going back.

 

[okeydokey]

What a nice story. I wish you the best of luck!

 

[Mrs. Charming]

I just wanted to wish you the best of luck in whatever you decide... or whatever is decided for you!

 

[pyrxtc]

I don't know if the feeling ever goes away. My DH and I bring it up ever other month or so. We now talk about how maybe he had his vasectomy too soon/young. We thought we were done but now .....

 

[Mrs. Charming]

I don't know if the feeling ever goes away. My DH and I bring it up ever other month or so. We now talk about how maybe he had his vasectomy too soon/young. We thought we were done but now .....

I'm glad you said this because DH is very eager to jump under the knife and get snipped. He's 33, I'm not even 30. I think I don't want to go through this again, but my stomach goes into knots thinking that one of us would undergo a *permanent* change (or at least expensive to un-do...)

 

[Katy Belle]

I have a good friend who married at age 16. She hoped to have 4 kids by 22. She never got pregnant. Never pursued fertility treatment and she and her DH just accepted that they would never have children. They lived a very care free lifestyle, traveling a lot, etc. At age 36 she found out she was pregnant. They now have one daughter, age 15. She has been the light of their lives They basically just fit her into their lives and she goes everywhere with them.

Good luck to you!

Katy

 

[Nanabug02]

I have a good friend who married at age 16. She hoped to have 4 kids by 22. She never got pregnant. Never pursued fertility treatment and she and her DH just accepted that they would never have children. They lived a very care free lifestyle, traveling a lot, etc. At age 36 she found out she was pregnant. They now have one daughter, age 15. She has been the light of their lives They basically just fit her into their lives and she goes everywhere with them.

Good luck to you!

Katy

This is kind of my story too, without the ending yet. DH and I have tried to have kids since we got married (I was 22), but I've never gotten pregnant. We went to see a fertility doctor, but I have unexplained infertility. DH doesn't believe in fertility drugs, so we've just been under the "if it happens, it happens" mentality. I'm 31 now, so we've mostly accepted that we probably won't be having kids. But, I do get sad every few months about it. I still have this little hope in the back of my mind that I'll suddenly end up pregnant one day. And I know DH does too. I just keep telling myself to have faith and follow the path put in front of you.

To the OP, I say - if you feel like you want to pursue having kids after all this time, go for it. Maybe its your time to follow a new path. Good luck!