dd pregnant-happy and sad

[tigercat]

My dd is pregnant with her 3rd child. I am really happy about it and can't wait for my 5th dgrdchild but my dm died earlier this year. It has been the family tradition that before others in the family are told than Nana was told first. Sometimes it was fun because someone would want to see Nana off by herself away from the family and you knew but dm was the first to be told officially. This is the first great dgrdchild that breaks that tradition. There were 8 kids, 18 grands and 14 greats before my dm died. Also, this will be the first to not get their first set of dishes for their 1st birthday. Something that is interesting though is my dd has had a really hard time getting pregnant with her other 2. This time only took a month. And the baby is due in June. If born in June it will be the first child of all the family to have a birthday in June. We have one who married into the family but not born into the family. So while I am happy and excited I am also having a really hard time. Because of the way my dm died this is actually the first time I am really having a hard time. I have cried more this week than I did at the time.
tigercat

 

[redlight]

Congratulations to your daughter!

I can understand why you have mixed emotions. My condolences about your mom.

 

[4nana]

I'm sorry sweetie, I remember the thread about the loss of your dear Mom . My, she was so blessed to be surrounded by such a special loving family who always included her in such a sweet family tradition.

I send you prayers of comfort and peace, as altho sadly she is no longer physically with you, if you believe, know she is in spirit, watching and guiding from above . Do you ever wonder, perhaps Mom already knows about this new blessing being sent from above and is wanting you and the family to enjoy the happiness of one of life's greatest joys....another child to love . Godspeed ^i^ and congratulations to all!

 

[Tinker'n'Fun]

I can see where this is bittersweet for you, but I can promise you your DM "did" know first, and I hope your and your DD can take comfort in that.

 

[robinb]

{{hugs}} I am sorry for the loss of your mom earlier this year. I almost lost mine a couple months ago.

Also, this will be the first to not get their first set of dishes for their 1st birthday.

It sounds like a lovely tradition. Why not continue it in your mom's memory?

 

[nskjerven]

{{hugs}} I am sorry for the loss of your mom earlier this year. I almost lost mine a couple months ago.It sounds like a lovely tradition. Why not continue it in your mom's memory?

my thoughts exactly

and I'm also a big believer in the "she knew" theory and I'm so sorry for the loss of your mom. I feel pangs of sadden everything I think of my father not seeing my son, his namesake

 

[TerryKitten]

I know the feeling... DD has never been seen my any of my grandmothers (her's great-grands) [both my Grandpa's passed away long ago]. DS was 6mts old when one died... and 3.5yo when the other one died. I had DD when DS was 5. I sometimes wish they could have seen her...

 

[Liberty Belle]

I understand how you're feeling. It sounds like your mom was a lovely woman who was devoted to her great grandchildren. Perhaps you could carry on her traditions?

My second son was born almost a month before my grandmother passed away. She lived an hour and a half away in a care facility and because life was tough with a newborn and I was recovering from a difficult delivery, I didn't take him out to meet her (she had dementia as well as emphesema). The day she was passing, we drove down there with my son. She never woke up to see him, but I fully believe she knew he was there and I know she is seeing him now.

He's six now and going through a difficult time and it helps me to know Granny is watching over him and enjoying him as much as we are.

 

[Shmily1]

Congratulations on the new baby and I'm so sorry for your loss. I also believe that your loved ones do know this important news.

In our family, it seems there's always someone you would like to have told something to. My DB died unexpectedly while I was expecting DD18. He always wanted to have a daughter named Spencer so a week after his death, I found out she was a girl so I decided her middle name would be Spencer. He would have loved to see her.... she looks and acts like him!!! My DM bought all the grandchildren's coming home outfits. DD18 had DGS 2 1/2 months ago so to continue on her tradition, I went to the same store she would have bought the outfit in and bought DGS's coming home outfit. I picked out one that she would have just loved!! The night DGS was born, his dad sat in the rocking chair and rocked him all night telling him about his grandfather who was killed last year. He held him and cried all night long knowing that his dad loved children. Just remember to teach your new grandchild all about your DM and carry on those traditions!! Hugs to you!!

 

[tigercat]

Thanks for all the nice replies. I know that she knows and I think she "helped" things along as my dd has a problem with getting pregnant and this one just "happened" in the first month. She really did love her grand and great grand kids. My dd's dd was a wonder with her Nana. When my dm was sick she had a hard time holding any kids as they would wiggle around. My dgrdd would go and sit very quietly not moving an inch while she sat on her Nana's lap. Normally she doesn't stop. At the very end my dm couldn't have anyone on her lap and my dgrdd sat beside her quietly and put her hand very gently on her leg. Not moving it as it would have caused pain. No one told her to do it, she just did. Now that same dgrdd talks about her Nana in heaven (or on a cloud) looking at her telling her how good she is, how pretty she is, how she is glad to see her. My dgrdd is just 3 1/2. I will take into consideration continuing the tradition of the dishes. Right now things are so tough financially I am not sure but maybe things will change in the next year. I like that idea.
tigercat

 

[LuvOrlando]

It sounds like you are in a hard situation. Grief can sneak up on us at the strangest moments and it always complicates things. I hope the fog clears soon and you can enjoy this time with your DD and her family preparing for a new little angel in your lives.

 

[TwingleMum]

I'm sorry about your loss. But what a wonderful thing to look forward to a new baby!!

What kind of dishes would she buy?? Could you save a little from now to then and get them from you and Angel Grandma??

 

[tigercat]

The dishes are Beatrix childrens set. A really nice set of china dishes. It usually consists of a plate, bowl and cup. I think I might try and see if I have a little left to save for a set for the new one. The problem is that I don't have a job and with my health right now will probably not be able to get one for a while. I have about a year so if I start saving even $10.00 a month I should have enough. Good idea. And I like the idea of it coming from Angel Nana. My 3 1/2 yr old will love it.
tigercat

 

[mommy*RN]

I'm sorry about the loss of your mother. It's never easy. I lost my mom 10 yrs ago and I still miss her everyday.

I had another thought...maybe your DD's other children could send great-grandma a balloon with a note tied to it announcing the impending arrival of the new baby. That way Nana still gets to find out apart from the others.

I agree to try and continue the tradition of the dishes. It seems so meaningful. My aunt gave me two birthday cards she found in my grandma's house. They were signed, "Love, Grandma B". No idea who they were for, but she gave them to me to save for my kids. My Grandma just passed away this past June...a week before my DS's 7th birthday. I really miss her too.

 

[robinb]

The dishes are Beatrix childrens set. A really nice set of china dishes. It usually consists of a plate, bowl and cup. I think I might try and see if I have a little left to save for a set for the new one. The problem is that I don't have a job and with my health right now will probably not be able to get one for a while. I have about a year so if I start saving even $10.00 a month I should have enough. Good idea. And I like the idea of it coming from Angel Nana. My 3 1/2 yr old will love it.
tigercat

You don't have to pay for it alone. Others in your family can chip in. Heck, your DD can chip in herself as the gift is for her child. I assume that since they were actively trying for this baby they are financially OK and able to buy a single set of dishes to keep the tradition alive.

 

[tigercat]

Mommy*RN actually the 3 1/2 yr old talks to Nana all the time. It seems she lives on a cloud in the sky and talks and see's her all the time. I figure when she is finally told we will tell Nana on her cloud. Ddgrdd hasn't been told yet because she will let everyone in the extended family know and my dd wants to wait until she is 3 months before letting everyone know. Since no one in the family is here it was okay.
tigercat

 

[mommy*RN]

Mommy*RN actually the 3 1/2 yr old talks to Nana all the time. It seems she lives on a cloud in the sky and talks and see's her all the time. I figure when she is finally told we will tell Nana on her cloud. Ddgrdd hasn't been told yet because she will let everyone in the extended family know and my dd wants to wait until she is 3 months before letting everyone know. Since no one in the family is here it was okay.
tigercat

That is so sweet!! Children have the knack for knowing how to make adults feel better. I hope the fact she talks to Nana on the cloud gives you comfort that your mom is always around.

 

[tigercat]

Yes it is nice to see her talking and "seeing" Nana. I have just found out that my dsis has told everyone that my dd is pregnant. It seems that my dd had told her cousin but had told her to keep it quiet. She told her dm who decided that everyone should know. My dd should have know that if she told that one dc everyone would know. Oh well not my problem. I am just happy that she got her hormone levels tested and they are nice and high which is great. She has to take progestrone to make sure she doesn't miscarry so if her numbers are high that is great.
tigercat