DD#2 can't catch a break.

daughtersrus

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Feb 26, 2002
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I know that life isn't fair. DD#2 is a junior at a state college. Like her older sister, she went to community college that we paid for and then transferred. Both of them chose to major in Special Education. DD#1 applied for and was chosen for a tuition waiver. Her tuition was paid for by the state with the agreement that she teach 2 years in IL in the field of SpEd. She chose to do her Field Base and Student Teaching in the suburbs so that she could live at home. She graduated Dec'09 with very little debt since it was just 3 semesters of room and board.

DD#2 also applied for the tuition waiver but was not chosen(we're told it's random but everyone we know of that applied was lucky to be chosen~ even DD#2's roommate that doesn't take her studies very seriously got it). We took a Parent Plus loan to cover the difference between what her Federal Loan would cover. She too requested that her Field Base and Student Teaching be here in the suburbs. She just found out today that her Field Base which doesn't start until the spring 2012 semester is not going to be anywhere close to home. They were asked to give them the top 6 locations and this was her 6th choice. The district area that she was assigned to is about 1 1/2 hrs from campus. There is no parking anywhere close to their dorms on campus so they have to take a bus to the various lots adding about a 1/2 hour to get the lot. The travel time isn't so much the deal but now she's got to live on campus an extra semester meaning that we'll need to take another loan for her if she's not chosen for the waiver in the summer. Generally, the Student Teaching placement is near the Field Base placement so it's likely that she won't be able to live at home for that either.

Looks like now she's going to have to get a new car as well. We had planned on her being able to use mine during the day.

As I said, I know that life's not fair. It just breaks my heart that she seem to get all the bad breaks. She doesn't have a great relationship with her older sister (never has~completely different personalities) and this is going to add to it.

To top it off, today is her 21st birthday and she's called me twice already today crying. :sad1:

She has set up an appointment to speak to an adviser so we'll see if they can do anything.
 
That stinks! I hope the advisor has some good ideas. I feel bad for your DD. It sounds like she could stand to catch a break!
 
I don't know how much you want/can get involved but I work in a private college in the President's and Provost's office and I can tell you, the squeeky wheel gets the grease. I would have your dd push and push and you begin to make phone calls, after she speaks to her advisor, until you have what you want. Is it the right way to go about it, no, but if it is really something that you want changed, I would suggest, spending a few days next week on phone calls and e-mails, I see first-hand how well it works.
Let us know how she makes out.
 
Most importantly, make sure she knows that she has your support and love. I can get through anything knowing that I can count on my family....I was also the one who didn't get many breaks!
 

Awwww man,,,:hug: I feel for you. Happy birthday to your DD, news like that can certainly redirect the joy of the day. I hope you can get somewhere with her advisor, you know, the squeaky wheel and all. If logistics do not wotk out, maybe she will have a great experience with the location she does end up at. The car hurts, we searched for over 4 months to replace DH'd when he waas totalled last July...ended up paying $2500 more for a car that had equivalent miles/conditin that DH was...all because a student driver took out 4 cars. As you know my DD has the school she loves, friends, location etc. DS will not be starting off that way..but when I think about how their lives have gone, DD pretty much had the smooth sailing and DS is hitting the road blocks. It hurts to see it happen and I agree it can add to driving a wedge between them. I will keep my fingers crossed for you..these days I tend to feel like how much more can we take, so vent away and know others "get it".
 
That's terrible! My school doesn't give placements farther than 1hr from campus. It's terrible that she's having such a rough semester. :hug:
 
I am so so sorry.. I am going through a similar situation dealing with college and transferring and I know how painful and frustrating these things can be :( I just wish you both the best of luck, and whatever you do, continue contacting her adviser and even the higher-ups until something is done.
 
OP: Just want to wish your daughter the Best of Luck and a VERY Happy Birthday! :cheer2: I hope this can be corrected for her. And give her a special Hug from your DIS friends, Special Ed Teachers are Special People Themselves! :grouphug:
 
So sorry to hear what a rough time your dd is having right now. Just as another piece of information that might help, the Federal government has loan forgiveness programs for certain types of loans for Special Ed teachers. Here's a link.

http://studentaid.ed.gov/PORTALSWebApp/students/english/cancelstaff.jsp

I'm a teacher that teaches in a low income school, and I'm thrilled that I might be able to get $5000 of my loans for my Masters degree forgiven. Special Ed is up to 17,500! Worth looking into for sure. Good luck!
 
I agree I work at a college and she should go all the way to the top if necessary. My president makes sure each and every call that reaches his office is handled properly.
 
*hug* to your DD. Poor girl... I was thinking, perhaps she can make a appt. to see the Dean of her college (assuming shes in a lager school made up of many smaller colleges.) Or maybe her dept. head or chairperson. Often advisers can only do so much!
 
I agree I work at a college and she should go all the way to the top if necessary. My president makes sure each and every call that reaches his office is handled properly.

Yep! Totally agreed. The Dean I worked for frequently saw students, and sometimes these students need to work their way up the chain to get a problem handled.
 
Thanks for all of the replies. DD has an appointment Friday morning to meet with an advisor. If it doesn't go well after that meeting, we will have to go from there. They are on spring break next week and for my own piece of mind, I would like to get something set asap.

A few people suggested that I call but I'm afraid if I do that, I'll come across as one of those "helicopter parents" that so many people talk about. :scared1:

She goes to IL State University which has a huge education dept (top 10 in the country for teacher prep). If she doesn't get anywhere with the advisor, should the next step be the deans office? Having not gone to college myself, I look at the staff list for the College of Education and have no idea where to start.:confused3

Thanks again for any advice.
 
I understand your frustration, but as far as the placement goes I don't know if you really have any options. There are only so many placement openings and if that is all there is left I don't think there is anything you can do. The only advice I would give is to have her check with other students in her program and see if maybe they would switch out with her if maybe their homes are closer to where she was placed. Otherwise, she will just have to chalk it up to a learning experience and deal with it.
 
Thanks for all of the replies. DD has an appointment Friday morning to meet with an advisor. If it doesn't go well after that meeting, we will have to go from there. They are on spring break next week and for my own piece of mind, I would like to get something set asap.

A few people suggested that I call but I'm afraid if I do that, I'll come across as one of those "helicopter parents" that so many people talk about. :scared1:

She goes to IL State University which has a huge education dept (top 10 in the country for teacher prep). If she doesn't get anywhere with the advisor, should the next step be the deans office? Having not gone to college myself, I look at the staff list for the College of Education and have no idea where to start.:confused3

Thanks again for any advice.

I don't know if I'd call if I were you-- they probably can't tell you much anyway, since you're not the student. It would probably be frustrating at best.

I'd go to the Dean's office next if her advisor can't help. The Dean I worked for saw several students a day. It actually wasn't as big of a deal as one thinks going to the Dean would be. If she can't get anywhere with the advisor, which she probably won't, go to the Dean. Heck, have her make an appointment now just in case he's booked up. :thumbsup2

Good luck to her!!
 
I ended up going to the dean's office due to scheduling issues (needed 1 class to graduate and they weren't going to offer it for another year). They helped tons!

I don't think you or your daughter are being at all unreasonable with your request to have something where she can live at home.
 














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