Daycare issue (video games)

[Nennie]

Just looking for an objective perspective, so I don't blow things out of proportion!!

My kids attend a daycare with a pre-school type curriculum. Now that it's summer, they call it "summer camp" but it's pretty much the same stuff, with more parties, field trips, etc.

About a week ago, my five year old's teacher sent home a newsletter that mentioned that the kids can bring in their own hand-held video games to play with during free play time. I rolled my eyes at it, but didn't say anything.

Last night, my son mentions that all of his friends are bringing in their DS to play with, and asks if he can bring his LeapPad. (I thought he was going to ask for a DS, so was a little relieved when he only asked about his LeapPad). The more I think about it, the more annoyed I am. If I wanted my kids to sit around and play video games, I could pay a high school kid to watch them at my house, which would save a lot of money. However, I guess it's probably only an hour (or 2?) a day, so he is still learning during the other times of the day.

I also think that perhaps I'm a bit naive, thinking my kid (and the first DISer to call him "snowy" is going to get it!! LOL!) isn't going to be one of those kids who is obsessed with video games. I just really prefer that he engage in interactive play with the other kids, instead of playing on his LeapPad.

The other factor that plays in, is that my 3 year old is autistic, non-verbal, and his teachers are AMAZING with him. So, I don't want to say complain to the director about the video games, and then have those bad feelings out there. I also wonder if it's "too late" to even do anything about it, as the other kids are already bringing their games in.

Just annoyed by it all. Maybe I just needed to vent here, but keep my mouth shut at the school! Any thoughts???

 

[smitch425]

Just looking for an objective perspective, so I don't blow things out of proportion!!

My kids attend a daycare with a pre-school type curriculum. Now that it's summer, they call it "summer camp" but it's pretty much the same stuff, with more parties, field trips, etc.

About a week ago, my five year old's teacher sent home a newsletter that mentioned that the kids can bring in their own hand-held video games to play with during free play time. I rolled my eyes at it, but didn't say anything.

Last night, my son mentions that all of his friends are bringing in their DS to play with, and asks if he can bring his LeapPad. (I thought he was going to ask for a DS, so was a little relieved when he only asked about his LeapPad). The more I think about it, the more annoyed I am. If I wanted my kids to sit around and play video games, I could pay a high school kid to watch them at my house, which would save a lot of money. However, I guess it's probably only an hour (or 2?) a day, so he is still learning during the other times of the day.

I also think that perhaps I'm a bit naive, thinking my kid (and the first DISer to call him "snowy" is going to get it!! LOL!) isn't going to be one of those kids who is obsessed with video games. I just really prefer that he engage in interactive play with the other kids, instead of playing on his LeapPad.

The other factor that plays in, is that my 3 year old is autistic, non-verbal, and his teachers are AMAZING with him. So, I don't want to say complain to the director about the video games, and then have those bad feelings out there. I also wonder if it's "too late" to even do anything about it, as the other kids are already bringing their games in.

Just annoyed by it all. Maybe I just needed to vent here, but keep my mouth shut at the school! Any thoughts???

What do you mean by the bolded? Are you wanting the entire class to not bring in the games? Personally, I would let my child take in the games if he shows interest in doing so, but if you are not into the idea, just tell him no. It's summer and daycare...it's okay that learning isn't the focus right now. Also, DSs have multiplayer function between devices, so kids could very easily be playing games with each other.

 

[Southernmiss]

Just looking for an objective perspective, so I don't blow things out of proportion!!

My kids attend a daycare with a pre-school type curriculum. Now that it's summer, they call it "summer camp" but it's pretty much the same stuff, with more parties, field trips, etc.

About a week ago, my five year old's teacher sent home a newsletter that mentioned that the kids can bring in their own hand-held video games to play with during free play time. I rolled my eyes at it, but didn't say anything.

Last night, my son mentions that all of his friends are bringing in their DS to play with, and asks if he can bring his LeapPad. (I thought he was going to ask for a DS, so was a little relieved when he only asked about his LeapPad). The more I think about it, the more annoyed I am. If I wanted my kids to sit around and play video games, I could pay a high school kid to watch them at my house, which would save a lot of money. However, I guess it's probably only an hour (or 2?) a day, so he is still learning during the other times of the day.

I also think that perhaps I'm a bit naive, thinking my kid (and the first DISer to call him "snowy" is going to get it!! LOL!) isn't going to be one of those kids who is obsessed with video games. I just really prefer that he engage in interactive play with the other kids, instead of playing on his LeapPad.

The other factor that plays in, is that my 3 year old is autistic, non-verbal, and his teachers are AMAZING with him. So, I don't want to say complain to the director about the video games, and then have those bad feelings out there. I also wonder if it's "too late" to even do anything about it, as the other kids are already bringing their games in.

Just annoyed by it all. Maybe I just needed to vent here, but keep my mouth shut at the school! Any thoughts???

How much screen time does he get at home?

I've not had a special needs kid, so I don't have experience there.

But as the mom of teens, an hour of screen time a day, even at daycare, wouldn't phase me in the grand scheme of their lives. If I remember correctly the leappad was 'educational' games anyway.

My oldest played jump start preschool on the computer and I believe it actually helped him be ready for school and the computer tools used at school.

 

[sonnyjane]

How much screen time does he get at home?

I've not had a special needs kid, so I don't have experience there.

But as the mom of teens, an hour of screen time a day, even at daycare, wouldn't phase me in the grand scheme of their lives. If I remember correctly the leappad was 'educational' games anyway.

My oldest played jump start preschool on the computer and I believe it actually helped him be ready for school and the computer tools used at school.

Good point. My mom is a kindergarten teacher in Florida and they have scheduled computer time each day and their standardized tests are also taken on computers. As the PP mentioned, you can just limit his exposure at home if you're worried about it.

 

[Aliceacc]

The other important issue is that they're only playing games they already own.

If you had a huge issue with him playing video games, he wouldn't own any. I bet they're working under the assumption that a fair number of kids will bring in educational games, not a whole lot of Call of Duty type stuff.

 

[Mkrop]

This would not even register on my radar. It doesnt sound like a lot of time. You can limit screen time at home if you are that concerned.

 

[ImDMous]

Our circle of friends mostly have kids a little older than yours (7-12). When we all get together, the kids go a separate room to do their thing. Most of the time that involves playing together on their iPods. If you go check out what they're doing, they are all sitting around staring at their screens. But actually they are interacting quite a bit, just in the game. Helping some build something, helping someone else "un-build" it, playing hide and seek, etc just in the game.

They have plenty of time where they are riding bikes, running around the backyard and doing other things but Friday nights are their time to relax from the week just like ours.

When a birthday comes up, usually they will request trampoline park then pizza and iPod time with their friends. I don't think its reasonable to try to keep it completely away from them, it's just too much a part of what kids do now, it's how they bond. As long as it's for a pre-set time and you know what he's playing, I wouldn't make it a big deal.

 

[Mariep26]

This wouldn't bother me for summer. I just enrolled my daughter (4) in a preschool class that it really about her spending time with other kids and staying occupied. If that includes some screen time (games, movies, etc..) I am not concerned.

My son (5 almost 6) has ASD (PDD-NOS) and he is in an extended year program through his preschool. He is transitioning to K in September and the goal of the extended year is to prevent regression of the skills he has acquired. If they were doing a bunch of screen time it would bother me since we have more specific educational goals for his time at school over the summer.

IMO, the only reasonable thing to do if this bothers you is to tell your child no and tell the teachers that you prefer to limit the screen time.

 

[ICF]

wouldnt even bother me a little bit....

The kid is probably there 8-10 hours a day in the summer....an hour or 2 of video game time isn't going to hurt him.

And yes...he will also assuredly grow up wanting to play video games a lot as he gets older....no matter if you want him to or not.

 

[Spriesty]

I can understand both sides of this issue. You are paying for daycare at a preschool type place, and you want what you pay for. You want what's best for your child. And you don't think handheld gaming devices are what's best for him. It's understandable that you want more hands on, more learning, more interaction.

However, given the fact that the daycare place has let it be known that they are changing the curriculum for the summer, to be more laid back, more summer vacation-y, I think it's understandable for them to want to give the kids a break and let them enjoy the summer. You are otherwise happy with this place, the things they teach, and how they care for your son. They may simply think it's in the best interest of the children to let them have some down time, before "Back-To-School" and the normal routine resumes.

Free play time isn't a bad idea. And some kids may want to spend their free time playing games, and since it's summer break, the teachers are ok with it. The letter didn't say that the kids had an hour of "gaming time." It's free play. And that it's ok for their free play to be handheld devices, if that's what the kid and parents choose.

You are in a difficult spot because what everyone else is doing isn't what you want your child to be doing. A lot of the other children are using free play to play on their devices, and your child sees that, and wants to do it too.

The daycare isn't forcing your child to game. Your child sees the other kids doing it, and he wants to do it too. I think it comes down to this: you shouldn't choose how other kids spend their free time, even if you disapprove of handheld devices. You can, however, choose how your child spends their free play time, by allowing (or not allowing) them to bring in their leap pad. If you'd prefer for your child to play with blocks or trucks or do some crafts, just talk to your child and tell him that there are plenty of other activities for him to take part in during the free play time.

 

[StitchesGr8Fan]

I get why you are annoyed but I would let him take the LeapPad and ask teachers to limit his screen time.

My reasoning is that often times kids with special needs sense that they are different from their peers somehow and want to do what they think is "normal". If the majority of the kids are playing games, then I understand him wanting to play too. Also, if most of the other kids are playing games, especially the ones he socializes with, he may get bored playing with other toys by himself.

So long story short, I think there is a compromise that will make everyone happy.

 

[Nennie]

Thanks so much for the replies! I had a feeling I was blowing this out of proportion! LOL!!!

I never even heard of the term "screen time" before, so you can see I'm new to all of this, but it sounds like it's a pretty normal past time for most kids.

I'm so glad that I asked here FIRST!!!

I'll just chill out, and let him bring the LeapPad. Thanks again everyone!

 

[LilyWDW]

This is even an issue?

It's only during their "free time". I don't see a problem at all. It's not like they are spending all day every day on the systems. So what if the kids find a video game fun during free time. There is NOTHING wrong with video games! Why does it get such a bad rap? Do people just misunderstand it that badly? There is nothing bad about a kid playing a video game for a small percentage of the day.

 

[Spriesty]

Thanks so much for the replies! I had a feeling I was blowing this out of proportion! LOL!!!

I never even heard of the term "screen time" before, so you can see I'm new to all of this, but it sounds like it's a pretty normal past time for most kids.

I'm so glad that I asked here FIRST!!!

I'll just chill out, and let him bring the LeapPad. Thanks again everyone!

Again, I understand why you're all, "OMG, gaming? At school?!"

But I think you've misinterpreted, and may have jumped the gun. The daycare is allowing "free time" and the kids are choosing their games. Your problem isn't actually with the daycare or the teachers. It's that your child (and you) are in that awkward position of "well everyone else is doing it...."

 

[Spriesty]

This is even an issue?

It's only during their "free time". I don't see a problem at all. It's not like they are spending all day every day on the systems. So what if the kids find a video game fun during free time. There is NOTHING wrong with video games! Why does it get such a bad rap? Do people just misunderstand it that badly? There is nothing bad about a kid playing a video game for a small percentage of the day.

I have to agree. Studies have shown that gaming has some benefits. Of course, motor skills, hand-eye coordination. And it's also been proven that gamers generally process information more quickly than non-gamers. I'm not sure what the definition of "gamer" was for that study, but being a gamer has much less of a stigma than it did in the past.

 

[Mariep26]

Thanks so much for the replies! I had a feeling I was blowing this out of proportion! LOL!!!

I never even heard of the term "screen time" before, so you can see I'm new to all of this, but it sounds like it's a pretty normal past time for most kids.

I'm so glad that I asked here FIRST!!!

I'll just chill out, and let him bring the LeapPad. Thanks again everyone!

I'm glad you asked too! The whole free time thing is interesting. Now my kids have a little more time to themselves and they can decide how to use it so I find it interesting to see what they choose. They both have iPads but my son (ASD) will pick trains or digging in the dirt before a video game. My daughter will prefer to be outside but after that she loves Skylanders so she would be online doing anything related to Skylanders.

As an aside.. we always bring the iPads to Disney and they use them maybe 3-5 hours over a 8 day trip. Sometimes you will be surprised what kids choose for free time activities.

 

[HM]

OP, I think it would bother me too.

I, too, think of preschool as being a time to interact with other children, be creative, and learn new skills he'll need in elementary school.

I don't think of it as a time my child would be playing video games or watching tv.

If I were you, I'd let the staff know of your disappointment in this change in curriculum for the summer and let them know that your child will not be bring in a game and will need other things to keep him busy during free time (whatever they did before they instituted this change).

 

[Hrhpd]

Just looking for an objective perspective, so I don't blow things out of proportion!!

My kids attend a daycare with a pre-school type curriculum. Now that it's summer, they call it "summer camp" but it's pretty much the same stuff, with more parties, field trips, etc.

About a week ago, my five year old's teacher sent home a newsletter that mentioned that the kids can bring in their own hand-held video games to play with during free play time. I rolled my eyes at it, but didn't say anything.

Last night, my son mentions that all of his friends are bringing in their DS to play with, and asks if he can bring his LeapPad. (I thought he was going to ask for a DS, so was a little relieved when he only asked about his LeapPad). The more I think about it, the more annoyed I am. If I wanted my kids to sit around and play video games, I could pay a high school kid to watch them at my house, which would save a lot of money. However, I guess it's probably only an hour (or 2?) a day, so he is still learning during the other times of the day.

I also think that perhaps I'm a bit naive, thinking my kid (and the first DISer to call him "snowy" is going to get it!! LOL!) isn't going to be one of those kids who is obsessed with video games. I just really prefer that he engage in interactive play with the other kids, instead of playing on his LeapPad.

The other factor that plays in, is that my 3 year old is autistic, non-verbal, and his teachers are AMAZING with him. So, I don't want to say complain to the director about the video games, and then have those bad feelings out there. I also wonder if it's "too late" to even do anything about it, as the other kids are already bringing their games in.

Just annoyed by it all. Maybe I just needed to vent here, but keep my mouth shut at the school! Any thoughts???

Anytime would have been too late. You cannot change a curriculum for an entire group to suit just your child's needs. You are going to run into this many times in your child's school career. They may show a movie you do not approve of, read a book, they may play educational games on the computers during bad weather, etc.

You will just have to say no and your child will have to adjust to the fact that his parents have different priorities.

This is free choice time. Usually just a break in learning. If you prefer your child to not use electronic devices, and that is absolutely your right, you just say no to your child. But you cannot and should not ask the school to forbid it for all the students just so you can say no easier to your child.

It is summer time. Children, especially young children, should not be "on" all the time. They deserve a free choice time where they get to do what they want. Pre-school is very stimulating. They need a break, even from their peers, for a little part of each day.

Does the school not have recess where they all go out and play together, sans electronics? You said they are doing more field trips. It sounds like they are getting a ton of face time with their peers.

I would not worry about it and yes, I would absolutely, positively keep my mouth shut about it except to let the staff know that you prefer your son to not play electronics, so you will not be sending in his leap pad. But never expect things to change for just one child.

Edited to add: Just read the OP's update. Wasn't posted yet when I started this response.

Glad to hear you are not stressing about it and have decided to send his leappad with him. And kudos to you to get feedback before going to the school!

 

[LilyWDW]

OP, I think it would bother me too.

I, too, think of preschool as being a time to interact with other children, be creative, and learn new skills he'll need in elementary school.

I don't think of it as a time my child would be playing video games or watching tv.

If I were you, I'd let the staff know of your disappointment in this change in curriculum for the summer and let them know that your child will not be bring in a game and will need other things to keep him busy during free time (whatever they did before they instituted this change).

They are only playing these games for a short period of time compared to the whole day. Only during "free time". Heck, when I was in school we were allowed to play video games on the computer during "free time". This was back in the day of Oregon Trail and Where in the World is Carmen Sandiego? So it is nothing new at all.

And I am sure there are other things already available. If the OP isn't happy with those choices I am sure they would welcome her providing what she finds appropriate.

 

[mom2rtk]

wouldnt even bother me a little bit....

The kid is probably there 8-10 hours a day in the summer....an hour or 2 of video game time isn't going to hurt him.

And yes...he will also assuredly grow up wanting to play video games a lot as he gets older....no matter if you want him to or not.

I'm totally supportive of wanting to limit his time. But he's at "school" 8-10 hours a day. Wouldn't he probably be playing some of that time if he was at home? Besides, if all the other kids are playing their own games, who is he going to interact WITH?

Again, I understand why you're all, "OMG, gaming? At school?!"

But I think you've misinterpreted, and may have jumped the gun. The daycare is allowing "free time" and the kids are choosing their games. Your problem isn't actually with the daycare or the teachers. It's that your child (and you) are in that awkward position of "well everyone else is doing it...."

You need to understand that while you are in control of what goes on in your home, you can't control what the other kids do. And the rest of the boys from here forward will be playing a lot of video games.

My 19 year old has always been a huge gamer. And he's doing just fine...... just completed his first year of engineering school. In fact, the games were a great bonding tool his first year away from home. Yet he still found time to study and get good grades.