Author's notes:
First, sorry folks, no pictures today. Dan took like 5 pictures and none of them are worth posting, especially considering the limited space available on the photo gallery.
Second, my apologies to our British friends, for I may have done them a great injustice in this report.
Me: 33, fifth WDW trip
DH Dan: 36, first-timer
Where are we going today, Blizzard Beach? Should I take my camera?
I cannot believe he is still asking me.
Take your camera! Always take your camera! I say. Dan sighs and wraps the camera case strap around his hand. And make sure you are wearing your swim trunk, I add. He is very excited by this announcement, so I dont have the heart to tell him that Blizzard Beach isnt on the agenda today. Dan definitely knows somethings up because I left poor Pal Mickey sitting on the table in the room. I could almost feel The Mouse watching us leave. W-w-where are you going, pals? Arent you taking me with you? Uh guys? I felt bad about leaving him. I also felt empty-handed.
When the Typhoon Lagoon/Downtown Disney bus pulls up, Dan wants to know why were boarding it. Hes clearly disappointed. Perhaps he thinks were going shopping.
We arrive at Typhoon Lagoon just before opening, so weve got plenty of choices of lawn chairs. While considering our best lawn chair location, we hear the KA-BOOM! of the first tidal wave, then see this amazing giant blue wave inflate and stretch its way toward us. This is no ordinary water park, we realize. Since this is my first time at TL too, Im getting pretty jazzed about riding the waves. So, after much speculation about THE perfect location to drop off our goods (this process alone took a good ten minutes...men are impossible), I scurry to find a restroom. About twenty minutes later I return and Dan is clearly worried. Is everything okay? It is now I cannot believe how long it took me to find a restroom.
Bladders empty (mine anyway), we decide to try out some of the slides before tackling the waves. We found that some are simple (Keelhaul Falls), some will literally dump you out of your tube at the end of the slide (Mayday Falls), some will make you wait a good half-hour in line and then really suck (Gang Plank Falls), some will hurt because of the tube welds (Storm Slides) and some will almost make you lose your top (Humunga Kowabunga), even when youre super careful.
Slides out of the way, it was finally time to check out the wave pool. Even if you were taken to Typhoon Lagoon blindfolded, there are two distinct sounds that are unmistakable of this environment: the sonic boom of the waves followed by screams, and British accents. Now I dont know WHY British tourists flock to this particular Orlando destination, but they do. And they outnumber us Americans four to one. I swear. At least, that is what it seemed.
Wheres ma knickers, luv?
A jolly good spot raht ere, Nigel.
Ka-BOOM! Aaaaahhhh!
Like a spot of tea, aye?
So we swim out near the source of the waves and wait for that unequivocal BOOM! (followed by the screams of anxious wave riders) and we frantically start swimming back. The feeling of this massive force that propels your body is so powerful, so overwhelmingly fun, that Dan and I could do nothing but giggle and pant out of breath once it had passed. We were immediately addicted. Exhausted but exhilarated, wave after wave, we refused to leave our watery playground. We spent the next few hours wrestling with the waves and cared about little else. Thats when you definitely know youre on vacation.
But all this wave fighting is making me hungry, so around one oclock we head in for food. This was, of course, after several oh just one more wave attempts. But we do manage to escape. We trudge back onto mainland and discover that, after waiting in line for about fifteen minutes, my vegetarian options are like, not an option. Option implies MORE THAN ONE CHOICE. So I can have the cheese pizza, or the well, I guess that's it. Ill take the cheese pizza. Do you serve any vegetables with it? No, I mean besides french fries. This pizza tastes exactly like the pizza I had at Animal Kingdom, and Im pretty bitter about no veggie burgers sightings. No matter, despite the refined flour dough and lack of nutritional value, its still energy for more wave fighting.
Dan and I finish our meals, and we think hey, why dont we head to the lazy river and digest this food? We are so proud of ourselves for thinking this up. Unfortunately, half the park thought of that too, and the lazy river has become a packed one.
Well, it was supposed to be lazy. But Dan thinks hes cute and makes sure that every time an opportunity to get wet arises, hes grabbing my tube and positioning it so that I get doused. Thats the trouble with having a strong husband. One time I tried to outsmart, outwit, and outplay him, and when I saw the waterfall approaching and that devilish grin spreading, I sat up and yanked his grip from my tube a little too hard. I not only did I not avoid the waterfall, I dumped the tube and myself completely upside down in the river. The female lifeguard ran over to make sure I was okay. Settle down lady, its like three feet of water. Its Dan you have to worry about because Im going to strangle him. Its no longer the lazy river, its about to become Castaway Creek, the River of Death.
Despite our near-death experience, we found the river to be a welcomed ride. It was a good runner-up to the wave pool. We floated about two times around before peeling ourselves from the tubes and heading back to the lawn chairs. Okay, I headed to the lawn chair while Dan skipped off to play in the wave pool. Here was my opportunity to power nap and let the last 4 days of commando park hopping drain from my body. Zzzzzzzzzzzz.
An hour later Dan wakes me up and says hes been recognized by a fan. Apparently someone who was unfortunate enough to see the Indy show the previous day had recognized my husband. Dan is beaming, so proud of his newly acquired celebrity status.
I suggest that we should go back to the River of Death before we head back to the hotel. It started off that way, anyway, but next to the entrance we spotted two boat engines that spewed water into the river. These engines were extra special because an operator could control where the water was aiming. How did we miss these bad boys earlier? River of Death participants, beware. Dan and I both have loaded engines and were not afraid to douse you as you pass by! Most of the floaters took it in stride, some tried like anything to avoid the sprays. Dan loved those people the best.
Did you come to a water park to not get wet? he taunted to the dodgers below. I could not stop laughing. It was amusing to watch people dive underwater to avoid getting sprayed andlistening to the now-familiar sounds of Bloody h***! A couple floated past and I aimed my spray at them. The woman, blocking herself from the stream, yelled up at me, Youre too pretty to be so evil! For petes sake, how could I torture someone who was calling me pretty? So I redirected the spray at her boyfriend/husband. Hey! Stop! he yelled, cringing. You didnt call me pretty! I yelled at him. This is what you get for not calling me pretty!
By the time we got back to the resort, we were beat. Mickey waited up for us, and boy was he glad to see us. I showered, put on fresh clothes, grabbed my pal, and we were off again. Theres no time for rest on vacation! We hopped on the monorail to Epcot. With no dinner plans in mind, we walked through World Showcase to see what fancied us. Unfortunately, Dans choice included perhaps the most meat-infested and veggie-unfriendliest restaurant around the lagoon, Biergarten. Dan happens to love German food. Of course, German food is all about meat, meat, and more meat. So we went to San Angel in Mexico, instead. Who does he think this trip is for, anyway?
I almost would have preferred a plate of German meat. Not that the food at San Angel was gross, it just wasnt, well, all that appetizing. My veggie plate was swimming in cheeses and sour cream as if the food itself was too bland to bother with. Dan ordered some boneless chicken dish that came wrapped around a chicken bone. He said it freaked him out. The food was less than memorable for us, and we later decided that this was possibly the worst meal of our trip. What a bummer food day!
First, sorry folks, no pictures today. Dan took like 5 pictures and none of them are worth posting, especially considering the limited space available on the photo gallery.
Second, my apologies to our British friends, for I may have done them a great injustice in this report.
Me: 33, fifth WDW trip
DH Dan: 36, first-timer
Where are we going today, Blizzard Beach? Should I take my camera?
I cannot believe he is still asking me.
Take your camera! Always take your camera! I say. Dan sighs and wraps the camera case strap around his hand. And make sure you are wearing your swim trunk, I add. He is very excited by this announcement, so I dont have the heart to tell him that Blizzard Beach isnt on the agenda today. Dan definitely knows somethings up because I left poor Pal Mickey sitting on the table in the room. I could almost feel The Mouse watching us leave. W-w-where are you going, pals? Arent you taking me with you? Uh guys? I felt bad about leaving him. I also felt empty-handed.
When the Typhoon Lagoon/Downtown Disney bus pulls up, Dan wants to know why were boarding it. Hes clearly disappointed. Perhaps he thinks were going shopping.
We arrive at Typhoon Lagoon just before opening, so weve got plenty of choices of lawn chairs. While considering our best lawn chair location, we hear the KA-BOOM! of the first tidal wave, then see this amazing giant blue wave inflate and stretch its way toward us. This is no ordinary water park, we realize. Since this is my first time at TL too, Im getting pretty jazzed about riding the waves. So, after much speculation about THE perfect location to drop off our goods (this process alone took a good ten minutes...men are impossible), I scurry to find a restroom. About twenty minutes later I return and Dan is clearly worried. Is everything okay? It is now I cannot believe how long it took me to find a restroom.
Bladders empty (mine anyway), we decide to try out some of the slides before tackling the waves. We found that some are simple (Keelhaul Falls), some will literally dump you out of your tube at the end of the slide (Mayday Falls), some will make you wait a good half-hour in line and then really suck (Gang Plank Falls), some will hurt because of the tube welds (Storm Slides) and some will almost make you lose your top (Humunga Kowabunga), even when youre super careful.
Slides out of the way, it was finally time to check out the wave pool. Even if you were taken to Typhoon Lagoon blindfolded, there are two distinct sounds that are unmistakable of this environment: the sonic boom of the waves followed by screams, and British accents. Now I dont know WHY British tourists flock to this particular Orlando destination, but they do. And they outnumber us Americans four to one. I swear. At least, that is what it seemed.
Wheres ma knickers, luv?
A jolly good spot raht ere, Nigel.
Ka-BOOM! Aaaaahhhh!
Like a spot of tea, aye?
So we swim out near the source of the waves and wait for that unequivocal BOOM! (followed by the screams of anxious wave riders) and we frantically start swimming back. The feeling of this massive force that propels your body is so powerful, so overwhelmingly fun, that Dan and I could do nothing but giggle and pant out of breath once it had passed. We were immediately addicted. Exhausted but exhilarated, wave after wave, we refused to leave our watery playground. We spent the next few hours wrestling with the waves and cared about little else. Thats when you definitely know youre on vacation.
But all this wave fighting is making me hungry, so around one oclock we head in for food. This was, of course, after several oh just one more wave attempts. But we do manage to escape. We trudge back onto mainland and discover that, after waiting in line for about fifteen minutes, my vegetarian options are like, not an option. Option implies MORE THAN ONE CHOICE. So I can have the cheese pizza, or the well, I guess that's it. Ill take the cheese pizza. Do you serve any vegetables with it? No, I mean besides french fries. This pizza tastes exactly like the pizza I had at Animal Kingdom, and Im pretty bitter about no veggie burgers sightings. No matter, despite the refined flour dough and lack of nutritional value, its still energy for more wave fighting.
Dan and I finish our meals, and we think hey, why dont we head to the lazy river and digest this food? We are so proud of ourselves for thinking this up. Unfortunately, half the park thought of that too, and the lazy river has become a packed one.
Well, it was supposed to be lazy. But Dan thinks hes cute and makes sure that every time an opportunity to get wet arises, hes grabbing my tube and positioning it so that I get doused. Thats the trouble with having a strong husband. One time I tried to outsmart, outwit, and outplay him, and when I saw the waterfall approaching and that devilish grin spreading, I sat up and yanked his grip from my tube a little too hard. I not only did I not avoid the waterfall, I dumped the tube and myself completely upside down in the river. The female lifeguard ran over to make sure I was okay. Settle down lady, its like three feet of water. Its Dan you have to worry about because Im going to strangle him. Its no longer the lazy river, its about to become Castaway Creek, the River of Death.
Despite our near-death experience, we found the river to be a welcomed ride. It was a good runner-up to the wave pool. We floated about two times around before peeling ourselves from the tubes and heading back to the lawn chairs. Okay, I headed to the lawn chair while Dan skipped off to play in the wave pool. Here was my opportunity to power nap and let the last 4 days of commando park hopping drain from my body. Zzzzzzzzzzzz.
An hour later Dan wakes me up and says hes been recognized by a fan. Apparently someone who was unfortunate enough to see the Indy show the previous day had recognized my husband. Dan is beaming, so proud of his newly acquired celebrity status.
I suggest that we should go back to the River of Death before we head back to the hotel. It started off that way, anyway, but next to the entrance we spotted two boat engines that spewed water into the river. These engines were extra special because an operator could control where the water was aiming. How did we miss these bad boys earlier? River of Death participants, beware. Dan and I both have loaded engines and were not afraid to douse you as you pass by! Most of the floaters took it in stride, some tried like anything to avoid the sprays. Dan loved those people the best.
Did you come to a water park to not get wet? he taunted to the dodgers below. I could not stop laughing. It was amusing to watch people dive underwater to avoid getting sprayed andlistening to the now-familiar sounds of Bloody h***! A couple floated past and I aimed my spray at them. The woman, blocking herself from the stream, yelled up at me, Youre too pretty to be so evil! For petes sake, how could I torture someone who was calling me pretty? So I redirected the spray at her boyfriend/husband. Hey! Stop! he yelled, cringing. You didnt call me pretty! I yelled at him. This is what you get for not calling me pretty!
By the time we got back to the resort, we were beat. Mickey waited up for us, and boy was he glad to see us. I showered, put on fresh clothes, grabbed my pal, and we were off again. Theres no time for rest on vacation! We hopped on the monorail to Epcot. With no dinner plans in mind, we walked through World Showcase to see what fancied us. Unfortunately, Dans choice included perhaps the most meat-infested and veggie-unfriendliest restaurant around the lagoon, Biergarten. Dan happens to love German food. Of course, German food is all about meat, meat, and more meat. So we went to San Angel in Mexico, instead. Who does he think this trip is for, anyway?
I almost would have preferred a plate of German meat. Not that the food at San Angel was gross, it just wasnt, well, all that appetizing. My veggie plate was swimming in cheeses and sour cream as if the food itself was too bland to bother with. Dan ordered some boneless chicken dish that came wrapped around a chicken bone. He said it freaked him out. The food was less than memorable for us, and we later decided that this was possibly the worst meal of our trip. What a bummer food day!
Can't wait for the next installment!
We were very tired. Even saw a plow off the road, lol...
