Daughters who have lost their fathers

Angeejoe

DIS Veteran
Joined
Aug 29, 2012
I lost my dad 2 yrs ago in a car accident, he was only 58. My life has never been the same.
 

Asc341

Mouseketeer
Joined
Jan 3, 2013
I was in a similar situation as you are and very close in age to. I got married just months after he died. My fiancé in fact met my dad days before his passing. I will tell you though, the day you get married, you will still have an incredible day because you will be able to feel your dad present, and you will feel how proud he is of your decision. It will be a bitter sweet feeling, but you will be proud and at peace.
I lost mine at 22 as well, and boy has it been a struggle in my life. I got married last September, and while it was tough, DisneyFairytale was right - I felt like he was there with me, smiling down on all of us. We even displayed a framed picture of him at the wedding - it got our guests talking and telling stories about him, which made it feel like he was even more present.

It's been a few years since he died, but sometimes I still have days where life seems so overwhelmingly hard without him - and today happens to be one of those days. I guess really nothing can replace a girl's father!
 

arielchickenofthesea

Mouseketeer
Joined
Jul 4, 2007
I think this would be a great place for me. Last year I lost my dad to Alzheimer's/kidney failure at age 90. He had a good long life, full of love, family and hard work. I miss him terribly. I am 60 yrs old and had my father a very long time. I am very blessed in that I had so long with him.

But watching the ravages of Alzheimer's is torment. I hated what it did to my once vibrant, strong father. He got so thin and weakened and could not make sentences anymore. We were blessed that he still remembered us, his family and friends, but that was starting to go at the end. And he just did not look like my dad anymore, if that makes sense. The gauntness of his face changed the way he looked and I hardly recognized him the last month.

He lived his last three months in a convalescent hospital and I wished so badly that he could have been home with my mom. But there was no way she could care for him and the people at the hospital were angels. They truly were heaven sent. We liked them a lot and they liked my father. They treated him with respect and dignity and cared for him as my mom was unable to.

I know many people lose their parents to this disease and other diseases and ways as well, and as I said, I feel very blessed to have had my father for so long. My mom is still with us, she will be 92 in two days, on the 5th. She has had a hard time of it, losing her partner of 70+ years. She has a lot of anxiety and she is alone now in the house. All of us, my two brothers and one sister take turns going to see her.

I take the train once a month to go stay with her for a week every month. It really helps her and we love her and want to be there for her. The train is relaxing and can calm me when the time at my mom's has been a little stressful and anxious. The trip home on the rocking train takes a day and a half and I get some time to myself to calm and regroup. It does relax me after dealing with my mom's stress and sadness.

She is on some medication to calm her from panic attacks now and she has not been driving for a few weeks and she needs to start to get out and go back to church and do her volunteer work and shop and all that. She is really a great driver still and she used to get around so well. This has taken the wind out her sails, as is to be expected. We hope that she will be able to calm down enough from the panic attacks to drive again and get out of the house so she can stay there. Otherwise we may have to look into assisted care for her...And she does NOT want that. She wants to stay in her home as long as she can. We hope that she can.

In the meantime I will continue to make my trips to see her for a week each month. It does take me away from my DH and kittys , but it is a week that I have with my mom. It is good to spend that time with her, as who knows what can happen. She is in her 90's and we don't know how long we have with her, so it is great to be able to spend this time with her.


I wish all of you here that have lost your dad, peace and comfort. I know the empty feeling of not having them here in person with me any more. But I feel his presence every day and know that his spirit is shining! It gives me some peace to know that he lives on in spirit, even if he is not in his human body anymore.

God Bless you all....I am praying for you.
 
  • Angeejoe

    DIS Veteran
    Joined
    Aug 29, 2012
    I think this would be a great place for me. Last year I lost my dad to Alzheimer's/kidney failure at age 90. He had a good long life, full of love, family and hard work. I miss him terribly. I am 60 yrs old and had my father a very long time. I am very blessed in that I had so long with him.

    But watching the ravages of Alzheimer's is torment. I hated what it did to my once vibrant, strong father. He got so thin and weakened and could not make sentences anymore. We were blessed that he still remembered us, his family and friends, but that was starting to go at the end. And he just did not look like my dad anymore, if that makes sense. The gauntness of his face changed the way he looked and I hardly recognized him the last month.

    He lived his last three months in a convalescent hospital and I wished so badly that he could have been home with my mom. But there was no way she could care for him and the people at the hospital were angels. They truly were heaven sent. We liked them a lot and they liked my father. They treated him with respect and dignity and cared for him as my mom was unable to.

    I know many people lose their parents to this disease and other diseases and ways as well, and as I said, I feel very blessed to have had my father for so long. My mom is still with us, she will be 92 in two days, on the 5th. She has had a hard time of it, losing her partner of 70+ years. She has a lot of anxiety and she is alone now in the house. All of us, my two brothers and one sister take turns going to see her.

    I take the train once a month to go stay with her for a week every month. It really helps her and we love her and want to be there for her. The train is relaxing and can calm me when the time at my mom's has been a little stressful and anxious. The trip home on the rocking train takes a day and a half and I get some time to myself to calm and regroup. It does relax me after dealing with my mom's stress and sadness.

    She is on some medication to calm her from panic attacks now and she has not been driving for a few weeks and she needs to start to get out and go back to church and do her volunteer work and shop and all that. She is really a great driver still and she used to get around so well. This has taken the wind out her sails, as is to be expected. We hope that she will be able to calm down enough from the panic attacks to drive again and get out of the house so she can stay there. Otherwise we may have to look into assisted care for her...And she does NOT want that. She wants to stay in her home as long as she can. We hope that she can.

    In the meantime I will continue to make my trips to see her for a week each month. It does take me away from my DH and kittys , but it is a week that I have with my mom. It is good to spend that time with her, as who knows what can happen. She is in her 90's and we don't know how long we have with her, so it is great to be able to spend this time with her.


    I wish all of you here that have lost your dad, peace and comfort. I know the empty feeling of not having them here in person with me any more. But I feel his presence every day and know that his spirit is shining! It gives me some peace to know that he lives on in spirit, even if he is not in his human body anymore.

    God Bless you all....I am praying for you.
    So sorry for your loss! What blessing the amount of time you had together! Your mom sounds like such a strong woman, it's wonderful that you have the time to travel monthly to visit! Have you thought about contacting the Office on Aging in your moms county? They mave have services to offer her to stay in her home or info on good assited living in her area.

    Two years later I still feel a bit lost without my dad. 2 wks ago I had a dream that my dad died, I woke up & thought what a horrible dream & then I realized it was real, I was so heartbroken. I get teared up just thinking about it right now.
     

    ravenanne

    Mouseketeer
    Joined
    Jul 8, 2014
    I just stumbled across this thread and I wanted to contribute. I lost my father in 2014, nearly a month after I got engaged. It was fairly sudden, although he had been suffering from COPD for years. Now I have a beautiful little girl and I tell her stories about her grandfather all the time. My life changed drastically in the past 2 years and I honestly owe a lot of it to my dad. He taught me so much and showed me endless support. Those who are gone stay with us in spirit and in our hearts.
     

    katmu

    Mouseketeer
    Joined
    Aug 8, 2013
    So sorry for all of the others who have also lost their fathers at a young age.

    My dad died from burns when I was 12 in 1982. We believe that he fell asleep smoking a cigarette. He was airlifted to a burn unit but never regained consciousness and my older brother who was 21 and I decided a few days later to have my dad removed from life support as he had had no brain activity in more than 24 hours. My parents were divorced and we were the only immediate relatives. There are still times when I miss not having dad around. He missed my graduation, my wedding, the birth of his grandsons, their graduations. I would not have wanted to him live his life as a vegetable, but that decision is still not something I would ever wish on any family. God bless.
     
  • anjuan

    Mouseketeer
    Joined
    Jan 10, 2012
    Hi, I just had to post because while I haven't yet lost my dad, my daughter who is 12 lost her dad (my x-husband) on January 5. He died from an aortic aneurysm very suddenly so my daughter never even got to say goodbye to him. He was only 51. Plus my daughter is adopted so she's really lost 2 dads in her life. She has been so amazingly strong-- her grades in school have remained excellent and she's a really good swimmer. She did grieve him initially, but really hasn't brought him up much since. He was an involved dad and loved her dearly. I just try to share good memories of her dad with her and to let her know I'm here whenever she wants to talk about him. I miss sharing her successes and challenges with him.
     

    bluejasmine

    DIS Veteran
    Joined
    Mar 5, 2005
    Lost my Dad may 25, 1999 and I still miss him terribly, now my mother is in hospice, we have no other family in the U.S. as both parents were immigrants and Im an only child.. The thought of being alone with out any parent is scary even tho Im 43. I am married and my husband is my best friend and my family but its still scary
     

    arminnie

    <font color=blue>Tossed the butter kept the gin<br
    Joined
    Aug 22, 2003
    I am so sorry for all, but especially for those of you that lost your father at a relatively young age. When I lost my dad he was about to turn 90. In some ways it was hard because I'd had him for so long, but in other ways it was easier because it really was time for him to go.

    But none of that matters. It doesn't matter whether he was the best dad in the world or some jerk who never did the right thing. It is still a loss.
     
  • stlfly

    Earning My Ears
    Joined
    Jun 13, 2017
    My sister and I lost our dad a little over two years ago. I was 23. I have many memories at Disney with him, and he was a big kid at heart. I think my increase in interest in going to WDW has a lot to do with losing him because we spent so many trips there together. It's my favorite place to be now as it makes me feel close to him and I especially like to go alone because it gives me time to remember him in my own way. I cry on many rides remembering riding them with him. I miss him very much.
     

    Summer2018

    DIS Veteran
    Joined
    Jun 29, 2017
    Good thread idea!

    I, unfortunately, belong to both groups. I lost my daddy in 2008 and lost my mom three years before. My daddy was an amazing father! So caring, encouraging, funny, super smart, not too strict but wouldn't let you get away with nonsense either. I know he'd be so proud that I'm pursing my doctorate now. He highly valued education. And he loved Disney!

    :hug: to all who miss their dads.
    Me too. I lost my mother at 22. She missed my college graduation, wedding, the birth of my daughter, and many other major life events.
    My father moved to Florida shortly after my mother died. He had serious health issues which prevented him from coming up to my graduation and wedding. We honeymooned in Florida, so my husband and father got to meet each other. He was still alive when my daughter was born. We sent him video of her and had a trip planned for May so that he could meet his granddaughter. We had her baptized on Palm Sunday. He died on Maundy Thursday. He never got to hold her in his arms. We changed our trip from Florida to Cape Cod where I vacationed with my parents every summer for 20 years.
    The birth of my daughter saved me from unbearable grief. I still miss them, but I know that one day we will all be together in heaven.
     


    Connect

    Disney News and Updates

    Get Daily Email Updates


    Top