Could use some budget tips

[Swimalie]

I think she meant it would be cheaper to get to Chicago than to get to Florida. I didn't read it as anything trashy or mean. Just a joke about how expensive this wedding is costing her.

OP - I am glad you found a cheaper solution. DH would not be going if it was our little family. We are also not told about anything and were the black sheep for missing his step-Grandmother's 80th birthday lunch yesterday. We missed it because we were told about 30 minutes before it started and we live 45 minutes away (and had another birthday party to go to). Family traveled from all over the state so it was definitely a planned event! We are told we never go to anything but we are never invited and find out about most family functions after they have already happened When FIL and SMIL would come to town to visit SIL they wouldn't even let us know they were coming to visit and we had a baby We would get a call when they were heading home that they had been in town and it "sure would have been nice to see you all"

It also sounds like you and your husband are not close to his family at all. I understand him wanting to go and why he is going but there is no way I would put myself under any financial burden to go. It's very inconsiderate that the bride or her family hasn't given you any information on the wedding. I hope it all goes well!

Thank you. At least someone here gets my humor. :good vibes: Some people just don't get my sense of humor and take things the wrong way.Chicago, for my husband, could be a business trip. Unfortunately, FL is not his area.

Sorry you had to miss your family event. Not being told about an event can be hard to get to it. Families can be difficult so difficult at times.

 

[Happyjen27]

Thank you. At least someone here gets my humor. :good vibes: Some people just don't get my sense of humor and take things the wrong way.Chicago, for my husband, could be a business trip. Unfortunately, FL is not his area.

I think perhaps she is just of a different generation, where Cheap means something about people's character, rather now for our generation it's simply a fiscal term. No worries, everyone with the gift of sight and literacy can see who is who in this thread.

Glad that some of my suggestions (cheaper room the first night) helped! I bet your husband is happy too, that the obligation he feels toward his family is going to be less of a burden on you all.

 

[Swimalie]

I think perhaps she is just of a different generation, where Cheap means something about people's character, rather now for our generation it's simply a fiscal term. No worries, everyone with the gift of sight and literacy can see who is who in this thread.

Glad that some of my suggestions (cheaper room the first night) helped! I bet your husband is happy too, that the obligation he feels toward his family is going to be less of a burden on you all.

Thank you. Your suggestion helped a lot. Not only the cheaper hotel the first night but also the 2nd night. It made me realize he didn't need to stay at the wedding hotel. Something I hadn't even thought of. You helped a lot.

 

[HM]

Without an invitation in hand, I'd be afraid to buy an airline ticket and reserve a room and car. Finding a hotel a bit further away sounds like the best bet on saving money (if he can't share with his mom and sister). (We used to stay in a hotel 30 minutes from my inlaws at Thanksgiving each year after we figured out that all the ones in their town smelled like ashtrays).

I understand you plan on him going, but I think he should just stay home.

I've missed weddings, funerals, and showers for family members due to distance and time constraints. I do not feel bad about that. The logistics of this as you've pointed out many times are expensive and just the planning is consuming way too much of your time. A gift sent to the bride's home sounds like a much better way to spend some of your hard-earned money.

I hope when he does go the wedding that he has a wonderful time and feels good about all that money he spent to be there. I'd hate for him to come back and regret it.