class gift exchange - slight vent

[jeepgirl30]

I just got a note from my DD10s teacher saying they are having gift exchange tuesday and each child is to bring in a wrapped gift. Girls should bring a gift for a girl and boys are to bring a boy gift. Gifts are to be brought in as soon as possible.

This is the first it has been mentioned and NO indication of value. This teacher has been very consistent in the late notices. But this is irritating. I thought I had most shopping done and did not plan on this extra gift.

I don't want to send DD with a $5 gift if everyone else is exchanging more but i also don't want to send her with $25 and her get a $1 item! This happend to her in kgarten, they had a book exchange. I sent it a book for around $10 and she came home with a clearly USED book that was 3.95 new. I didn't really care but she did notice the book was well worn.

 

[luvmy3]

I would send her in with a $5 gift.

 

[maddiesmom0116]

You can usually count on 5-10 dollars as the range, unless you live in NYC etc... I never worry about what DD gets, I could care less if it is the same value as what she sent. I understand you are upset about the late notice, but gift exchanges are pretty common. I always had one every year in grade school and DD has had one from preschool on every year, so I even if the notice was late, it is too common practice to be shocked about it. Also... The principal may have mandated it if all the other classes in her grade level was doing it and that is why you got a late notice. Our principle does stuff like that all the time.

 

[pixiewings71]

I think $5-10 is perfectly acceptable. No gift exchange with my DD11's class but if there had been I would have sent in a $5-10 gift.

 

[Hannathy]

I would simply have my child ask the teacher tomorrow. What did your child say when you asked them? Did the teacher talk about it in class and forget to put it on the slip?

Just have your child ask tomorrow then you will know.



For my DS's theirs was $5. I think that is a pretty good average for these things.

 

[Justsyd2]

I wouldn't worry about the value either, that doesn't teach your daughter the thought behind buying gifts...hoping to receive something of equal value in return...I would simply send in a gift, and move on.

 

[Leajess99]

I so hate late notices. I would contact the teacher and ask them if there is a price set. I know my dd's calss was going to do the gift exchange (it was optional and worder for all who wanted to participate) with a $5 limit. I had planned on sending in some extras just so no one got left out as I know how it felt when one child in my son's kindergarten class was going to be left out. My son gave up his book and we bought him one later. Since then I always send in extras.
We don't get to do ours now as school is out until 2011 because of the ice mess we had and the back roads are still pretty rough. The teacher said if no school tomorrow than no party or spelling test.

 

[EKW]

As a teacher, there was a time when I did exchanges...I always made it clear that the students were to spend $1...as in, the Dollar Tree, etc. Even with that, there were parents who just didn't get it.

One year a parent sent in a deck of drilled cards...the ones you get free at the casinos. Another parent sent a large can of orange juice. I always kept a few "good" gifts in my closet and would let kids who got stuff like that quietly exchange for something else.

Finally, it got to be such a hassle that I gave up on it! This year is the first time in over 15 years that I'm at a school that allows holiday celebrations. I bought gifts for my kids, but didn't ask them to exchange.

 

[Swimalie]

My son is only 5 but for now I can get away with this - I keep a stack of games and small toys in a closet for last minute gifts. I have Connect 4, Battleship, etc and a few books right now. I buy them when I see deals and then save them. Yesterday I turned in my donation for our Angel Tree and the kid only asked for socks, underwear and shoes. I felt bad for only giving practical gifts so I went to the closet and grabbed Operation to throw in there as well. It makes it easy when I need a last minute gift an all only cost between $5-10. It's a thought for you for the future. I'm not sure how practical as kids age, though.

 

[Familyof4lovesDW]

My DS7 had one this year. He is in 1st grade, they did not do it in K . Boys trade with boys girls with girls. The amount was $10.

I also had the same feeling as other posters. i hate it when you buy the nice gift and get the crappy gift in return. This has happened to me several times (example I gave the person a precious moment and got a dollar candle and dollar purfume from walmart, obvisouly not $10).

DS got 2 bakugauns and Fatastic Four silly bands. I hope he gets something he likes more than I care about the value. I know his friend (girl) got the fashion fairytale barbie.

I would email the teacher and ask her. A late notice is better than not getting it, which was my case. I did not get the email. I found out from another mom when i saw her at target.

 

[Dominus]

I grew up going to schools all over Texas, and we never did exchanges. It was universally regarded as a bad idea due to the financial and emotional considerations. I can't believe these schools are so far behind on this. My kids have a little party on the last day of school before the break, and they get to go home early that day. Good enough idea to me.

 

[taximomfor4]

Our kids' school has each class do a book exchange. A grade-appropriate book, wrapped, a boy brings one labeled BOY, a girl brings one labeled GIRL. You are supposed to only spend $3. But honestly, that almost always means going to half-price books and finding a gently used one. Or re-gifting one from your shelf.

My youngest dd re-gifted a book that older dd got in the exchange a couple of years ago. My son re-gifted a book he just got for his birthday last year that just isn't his thing. Then again, we knew the book exchange was coming, so we kept these. Both kids (8 & 10) seriously considered not participating in the exchange. Most people give books waaaaay too young for them. And I do always tell the kids that just because everyone else has that/does that/whatever, you don't HAVE to, too.

 

[GinnyEmma]

I use these situations as teaching moments. We are really blessed to be able to pick out a more expensive gift. Not everyone can.

 

[MSSANDRA]

My boys always got way more stuff than they could ever need so we too used getting a lower value gift as a teaching time. The family may be doing the best they can or have never given gifts and have no clue how to choose a gift, and we should assume most people do the best they can!

DS is way past these exchanges and DGS's preschool does it very different but when we were involved I often sent the teacher an extra gift in case she got that can of oj or whatever or if a child had nothing to exchange. I too always had a closet of things I got on sale to pick from. Now is the time to start one. Super great games for 5.00 or less!

 

[Iwant2BAprincess]

My ds's is doing the book exchange with a $5 cap-dollar stores were actually recommend by his teacher so I figure mine will probably be one of the high dollar items because I decided it wasn't worth the extra time for the stop when I was already at wallyworld. But on the up side-my ds loved the book I got for him to give so that made me feel good because I knew he would be proud of his gift

 

[swilshire]

My son's class had a $5 limit this year. I think it has been $10 in years past, but he goes to a school in a poor area.

Our notices always come late after I'm done with my shopping, but I usually have a few things in the "gift closet" that will serve the purpose.

Sheila

 

[stmize]

I too rec'd a late notice from dd10's teachers but instead of doing a gift exchange for each other the class decided to pick a angel child (the teachers chose a student from school and the class doesn't know who it is) and they had a want list from the child and they could choose to give or not.

 

[libinatorsmom]

I do agree with you on the last min notice... That would strap my hide alittle bit.. But as far as value who cares... its the thought that counts the effort and the fun for the kids not what they bring or bring home... you may send a $10 gift and it could go to a child in the class that may not get anything else for Christmas... think about the love and joy that child would have for that small gift......

 

[mickeyboat]

My kids are doing a mug exchange / hot cocoa party. Fill a mug - which can even be used if it is clean - with treats and bring it in. It was cheap and easy! The teacher will have a few extras in case kids don't bring them in. One girls said she is going to bring in a paper mug. I hope my girls don't get that one.

Their day care is doing a Yankee swap. I think it is going to be a miserable failure!

eta - I didn't even address the OP's issue. Email the teacher about the $ limit, or have your child inquire.

 

[krcit]

I too rec'd a late notice from dd10's teachers but instead of doing a gift exchange for each other the class decided to pick a angel child (the teachers chose a student from school and the class doesn't know who it is) and they had a want list from the child and they could choose to give or not.

I love this idea.



My ds's class is doing a $10 exchange. I got Cuponk and ds is trying to figure out a way to get his own gift because he wants it "so bad, Mom!!" Luckily, Santa got him one already, lol. I really wish they would do away with the grab bag. I know it has to be a hardship for some families. In fact, I think I will follow the lead of some previous posters and email the teacher and see if I can get an extra gift for someone who might be in a financial squeeze.