Children should not have to think like this

Discussion in 'Community Board' started by SLP958, Aug 13, 2013.

  1. SLP958

    SLP958 DIS Veteran

    Dec 14, 2012
    My DS is staring Kindergarten next week. Tonight we were talking through some of the things he is nervous about. It was the usual how will I find my teacher, what if I don't know any kids, how will I find my backpack etc.
    Then, he asks "what if a bad guy comes in the school with guns?" I responded by telling him the school was safe and they have door locks. This seemed to satisfy him but not me.

    I am sure he has heard bits and pieces of news stories but had never said anything like this before. I feel awful that a 5 year old has to think like this. I just cried.

    Anyone else had to address with such a little kid?
  2. daemom

    daemom DIS Veteran

    Apr 13, 2005
    It is definitely heartbreaking! It's a different world from what I grew up in. My youngest has lockdown drills now. A code is given over the intercom and each room has a particular place or wall in which the students are to sit--silently. I was in the school during one and it was unnerving. I had to sit where the kids sat, the leaders turned off the lights, windows were covered, door was locked. Then the principal walked the halls checked doors to verify they were locked--THAT in itself was scary! You're sitting in the dark and then that door is rattled!! Then, like a fire drill, the all clear is given and the kids go back to what they were doing. As much as it saddened me, the children weren't bothered by it at all--it's part of their normal routine now.

    I wish you luck next week! It's a big step for both of you!
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  4. Stitchfans

    Stitchfans Tres Charming

    Jan 30, 2005
    the bolded words really bother me. to think my grandchildren, when they are old enough to go to school will think nothing of it to practice lock downs. :sad2:
  5. Blueeyes101817

    Blueeyes101817 <font color=blue>Diehard <b>Cowboys</b> fan!<br><f

    Jan 31, 2004
    I am a Kindergarten teacher and we have been doing lock down drills for the past 5 years or so. As a previous poster said, the kids are not rattled by it at all. It does make me sad when my kids come in and tell me that they are worried about bad guys in the school.
  6. The Mystery Machine

    The Mystery Machine Sunrise at my house. :+)

    Jan 4, 2001
  7. ironpig70

    ironpig70 DIS Veteran

    Nov 29, 2004
    If definitely brings the suck but schools are just as safe today as when we were kids. 30+ years ago.

    Problem we have today is the 24 hour media and the political machine pushing its agenda behind every tragedy.
  8. mfd25wife

    mfd25wife DIS Veteran

    Jun 24, 2008
    After our school shooting just outside of Jonesboro, AR, the one child in the class that was not shot of the entire class that was targeted dropped to the ground. DD was in kindergarten when the shooting occurred. I told her to do the same if she was ever in that situation. Hit the ground and don't move if you are not in a position to get out. Play injured.
  9. mfd25wife

    mfd25wife DIS Veteran

    Jun 24, 2008
    People are crazy now, too. Every boy I knew carried a pocket knife and there were no stabbings. Well, there were a few, but that was girls and it was forks from the cafeteria or picks. Fights were with fists, not guns and knives. I'm from a hunting state. Many boys and male teachers carried their crossbows and rifles in their trucks from hunting before school. No one freaked out or got scared.

    I don't think schools are as safe as they were 30 years ago, but I do think it is because when there are tragedies, it's a nonstop coverage making the shooters famous and each wants to outdo the others. The Columbine shooters wanted to do more damage than the Westside shooters. I wish they could report it and be done with it, not carry it on and on for weeks. We still get some reporters show up every anniversary to talk to the survivors and community, and it's been 15 yrs. :sad2:
  10. katiee37

    katiee37 DIS Veteran

    Apr 24, 2011
    There was a shooting at my high school last year on the first day of school and it was easily the most terrifying experience of my life, even though I wasn't there since I'm in college. Someone I knew was shot by another student with a very troubled life. (Luckily the victim fully recovered.) It really changes your perspective on things and sadly I don't think the concept of the first day of school will ever be the same for me or for the rest of my community as a result. With that said, coming from a small-ish town where everyone has some kind of connection to the high school, very small children were aware of what happened and it seemed like they weren't scared for themselves at their schools; they were scared for their older siblings or their parents who are teachers in the school. No child should ever have to fear that their mom or dad isn't safe at work or that their older brother or sister isn't safe at school. It's sad what this world has come to and it's definitely something that has to be approached gently when speaking to children.
  11. rwdavis2

    rwdavis2 DIS Veteran

    Oct 2, 2007
    Are any of you old enough to have done an air raid drill in school in the 60's?
  12. abdmom

    abdmom DIS Veteran

    Apr 6, 2008
    Not old enough for air raid drills, but when I was in school, we had to do nuclear war simulations. It went something like this - 25 people are in a shelter, you only have supplies for 10. Choose which people will be allowed to stay.

    As a teacher, I've had to do lockdown drills. I've also had to discuss 9/11 on 9/12/01. I'd rather do the lockdown drills.
  13. aprilgail2

    aprilgail2 Guest

    I remember those- we used to either have to go out in the hallway and kneel down facing the wall with our arms over our heads or get under the desks in the classroom- I remember those sirens in the school blaring!
  14. eliza61

    eliza61 DIS Veteran

    Jun 2, 2003
    :thumbsup2 LOL. I remember them well. Even when I was a little kid I wondered how in the heck was this little wooden desk going to help in the Russians started dropping bombs. :rolleyes:

    Some times we would have to stuff ourselves in the cloak room. truthfully we thought they were cool because it got us away from classwork.

    I mourn for the kids today. Yeah they have all this great technology but what they have lost is far greater.
  15. Soldier's*Sweeties

    Soldier's*Sweeties DIS Veteran

    Apr 3, 2009
    I was in middle school when the Columbine shooting happened. That's when the lock down drills started for me. We had a few a year until I graduated H.S.
  16. Jennasis

    Jennasis DIS life goes on

    Jun 11, 2000
    My father used to worry about nuclear bombs when he was a kid in school. He told me once he was scared his MOTHER wouldn't know what to do so he had an elaborate plan to jump out his classroom window and run home to tell her how to duck and cover if the siren ever went off.

    Children shouldn't have to think like this...and luckily, they don't anymore. Take hear OP. Perhaps one day kids won't have to worry like your son.
  17. GadgetTheInventor

    GadgetTheInventor Mouseketeer

    Jul 23, 2013
    I do think kids are exposed to a lot of unnecessary violence in realistic movies and media coverage that causes kids to be overly fearful, but they are always going to have to cope with the violence they are bound to encounter in their personal lives...molestation, rape, physical abuse, bullying, online predators, etc.

    Back in the fourth grade, a bunch of us knew that one of our friends lived in a very abusive home. Things got really bad one day and luckily one of us who shared the same bus stop got her onto the bus and was able to articulate to the bus driver and then police and social services what had happened while the girl was receiving medical care. More of us were interviewed too and were able to get her father removed from the home. Thank goodness we were raised to think clearly in that situation or our friend would probably have died. A few years later another student disappeared, presumed murdered, and was never seen again. Statistically, 1 in 10 girls will be sexually assaulted before turning 18...

    I think kids are a lot more intelligent and resilient than we give them credit for. Violence and death has always been a part of childhood historically and talking about it openly these days actually allows adults to be able to react and help stop the violence before it continues and does further damage.
  18. Jedana

    Jedana DIS Veteran

    Feb 27, 2011
    DS's elementary school has gone on lockdown twice (last year)--not because of things happening at the school, but things that are happening in the neighborhood.

    The school is on a main road, so it is pretty busy. There was a police chase that ended up on that road, so they locked the school down during it.

    The other time, there was a robbery at a store up that road, in a strip mall. They locked the school down.

    Over winter break last year, his school put up 6ft chain link fences. The classroom doors on the portables, and all outside doors on the main buildings are to remain locked (can exit, but can't enter)...except for the main office door. His old school went one up on that, with all doors being locked and you would need to buzz and speak to the secretary to gain entrance. The doors there had only that small rectangular window in them, so it wouldn't do any good to try to enter that way.

    DD2's school had a lot of lockdowns her senior year (more than during her other years). Fights in the hallways would cause a lockdown scenario, after the first fight that year, where a kid set off a can of pepper spray on the guy attacking him. Several kids (including my DD) ended up getting medical treatment (washing out eyes, got oxygen, etc) as they were in the classroom where the spray was set off. One kid had a gun, a couple of kids had knives, and the ever popular non-custodial parent attempting to take the kids without proper authorization scenario (6 times, 3 were by the same parent) also happened.

    My kids and I have talked about safety. DS knows to follow his teachers instructions, to be quiet, etc. But I've also told him that if the worst is happening, and he can get away, where to go and how to get there. There are some wooded properties bordering the school, so it would be a short dash to those trees and houses.

    We've talked about what to do if you're in public, and shooting starts. DD1 was working at the mall in Omaha, when that shooting happened in 2007. :scared1:She was not near the shooter, but still...Scary stuff.
  19. Poohforyou

    Poohforyou DIS Veteran

    Mar 16, 2011
    I was thinking about this. It's just a bit before my school days but my oldest brother went through them. Kids are resilient and are more frightened by the unknown than being told the grim truth.

    Op, I remember having to explain 9-11 to my dd when she found out about it in 1st grade. She was 2 when it actually happened. The day I told her I felt her innocence fade. It's hard as a parent dealing with the harsh realities of our world as it relates to our children.
  20. Gumbo4x4

    Gumbo4x4 Note to the ladies who forgot to

    Jan 19, 2012
    DW is front office at our school. Custody fights are the #1 reason the cops are called at our school. On several occasions, it's appeared the mom moved with the kids and didn't tell the dad where. When the dad finally figures it out, he shows up at school demanding to take his kids.
  21. ilovemk76

    ilovemk76 DIS Veteran

    Oct 20, 2010
    My generation had to do bomb drills. It was no big deal to us. We would either get under our desks or line up in the hallway.

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