Child with cancer, GAC

[kissesbykim]

My DS7 is in treatment for Leukemia. We did his MAW to DW in October and we're now planning a "surprise" trip for him and DS2 to DL. Besides cancer, he also has ADHD and a sensory disorder.

I think I may need to get a "stroller as a wheelchair" tag so when his legs get tired (which is a huge problem with some of the meds he's on, even in the grocery store) he can ride on his brothers sit and stand stroller. We had a double stroller we rented for DW that he used then but he looked like the typical cancer child with a bald head so no one gave us any weird looks about a big kid in a stroller. I know I shouldn't care what people think but I'm afraid of the looks we may get about a 7 year old riding on a stroller. He doesn't look sick anymore although he still is a very sick little guy. Sometimes he acts appropriately but he has major outbursts and has a very hard time waiting in line (cries, sits on the ground, fits, gets into others personal space, ect.). Most of the meds he's on also makes him very sensitive to the sun. So, on our GAC I'm sure there will be multiple stamps. My problem is he looks so normal but just isn't and I hate to think of the comments others in the park may make about the stroller or behavior or having a GAC. I hate the thought of having to explain to others that he's a high functioning autistic child with cancer.... I just want us all to enjoy this vacation and our family has been through so much this past year. I know he wont last in the park if I don't get the GAC......I just hope we don't run into any confrontations. Ok, so I just needed to vent and see what others may have to say on this.

One thing for sure, having a child who LOOKS healthy has made my perspectives change. A lot of people have hidden diseases. It just really bites that my child is one of them...

 

[LoveMyBeautifulGift]

First off ...secondly, have you seen the Disigns board? You might be able to find a cool license plate for your son's stroller...Also, I doubt anyone will give your son a second glance in the stroller...my tall for her age 6yo rode hers the whole time we were there and we caught nary a glance headed our way...wait, I take it back...we got a few envious glances at the end of the night on our way out of the park or while waiting for the fireworks from parents carrying their sleeping children

Hopefully being able to use the GAC will fend off outbursts, but I will let you know something I haven't told anyone about our trip...just between you, me, everyone on the board and the world wide web...lol...my 6yo had a full on meltdown in DCA one day...I'm talking cringe-worthy , knock over the stroller and throw the popcorn container across the ground, pick her up and carry her to a quiet spot while apologizing to everyone in our path FIT...over what, who cares...but the people around us were either too busy doing their own thing to care or wanted to help...honestly, kids are over-stimulated, tired, and just plain overwhelmed at Disneyland...it would be weird not seeing some pouts, fits and plain old meltdowns...

As to the GAC, the only person you will have to explain anything to is the person helping you fill out the card...on the rides, they look at the card and may ask you a question (such as, do you want to sit next to him, or something specific about the ride), but you don't need to explain yourself to them...nor do you need to explain yourself to anyone else...other than a slight limp, my mother looks completely "normal"...however, she cannot stand for longer than 20 minutes tops on a good day followed by days of bed rest; and walking long distances ain't gonna happen, ever...plus she was surrounded by 3 apparently healthy, young (ish) adults and a child...but we didn't receive any dirty looks or shouts of "no fair" when we did utilize her GAC...plus many of the rides load from the exit anyway, so the mass of people probably won't even see you...and the CMs acted like it was all in a day's work...

I really hope you can put your worries (or at least these ones) to rest and focus on happier plans for your trip...again and I hope your trip is magical!

Almost forgot!-there is a Disabilities section that you might want to check out too...they may be able to field specific questions you have or provide you w/ more information than I have in my limited experience...

 

[Lorinda]

I don't t think you would get looks for a big kid in a stroller at DL anyway. My grand daughters were around 7 and 8 our last trip and they traded off in a stroller we rented and we noticed many many others doing the same thing.

 

[calidreamz]

I agree, you shouldn't have funny looks about the stroller. On a funny note when my DD10 (she was 9 at the time) and I went to DLR in December she commented several times that she missed being little and getting to ride in a stroller, she especially hated the walk back to the hotel.

 

[Happy 2 B Me]

Maybe a special t- shirt that states something quick like chemo done, anything for the few that might have given a bad look.

I say what the heck -- let it be their issue --- you and your child have been through enough. I hate the fact little ones have to endure cancer treatments.

I don't look sick -- but I have days when to get groceries I have to take a nap in car before I shop, after I get the few items I have to have I need another nap to drive home the whole 2 miles. I do not make red blood cells and if meds are not right well with very low red blood cell count I dont get enough oxygen. I actually had a woman yell at me for taking a handicapped spot. Took all my strength to "Slowly walk her way" Raise my shirt enough to let her see the tubes coming out of stomach ( sorry to be graphic). She said she was sorry but then tried to blame it on me for looking so well LOL

If anyone give you a look Just say "My son looks great now-- after having gone through chemo-- thank you for noticing "

He will not notice so carry on like you own the place. Just have fun and enjoy trip.

I am so glad he is doing good.

Patty

 

[Susie63]

No one will notice. Everyone is too busy doing their own thing. The only time we ever took notice of anyone in a stroller was when it was an exhausted parent crammed into one while waiting for a parade That draws a few amused looks.
Have fun

 

[mama2dutchies]

I would totally put a sign on my stroller..
"we kicked Chemo's butt.. Disney or Bust"
"Have Cancer willl travel"


Decorate the stroller and have fun with a horrible situation.
1. it will answer's people's questions without an uncomfortable conversation
2. people's unneed opinions will change

You know.. Disney usually is usually pretty awesome about stuff like this, and if you are open about it.. you might get a lot of neat things from CM's.. like help or hints, or who knows what!


Best of luck to you and your family.. I hope this trip is truly magical for you..

and remember if you hear opinions.. OPinions are like a$$*(Les everyone's got one and they usually stink..

 

[jernysgirl]

The only time we ever took notice of anyone in a stroller was when it was an exhausted parent crammed into one while waiting for a parade That draws a few amused looks.
Have fun

Hey - Don't knock it 'til you try it! I would be lying if I said I hadn't done it before!

To the OP: I agree with everyone else. I know you are probably going to be a little self-conscious about putting your DS in a stroller, but you have no need to be. You, your son, and the rest of your family deserve to have a GREAT family vacation together, and you should do everything you can to make that happen. If that means putting your kids in a stroller, so that they can have a more magical time, then do it and try to focus just on your boys and not what anyone else thinks.

By the way - my son is almost 6 and has been diagnosed as severely autistic and is completely non-verbal (but looks 100% healthy). Both he and his completely healthy 4 year old brother are both in strollers when we go to the parks.... so don't feel like you're alone. For everyone person that doesn't understand or gives you a "look" there is someone else out there that can relate to what you're going through.

 

[Halloweenqueen]

hugs

A surprise Disneyland trip...how awesome!

Like other posters have said, the only explaining you need to do it when you get that GAC. And please don't hesitate to use it! I know of some friends that are self-conscious and only use it when the lines look terrible. Sometimes rides breakdown or just slow down for no apparent reason and you are then stuck in line. Don't even bother with this...just use the GAC.

I saw many families using their GAC with a stroller in tow. Just take it through with you. I bet Guest Services would have good advice on signage, but it's probably not needed.

Have fun!

 

[DizNee Luver]

I love the idea of putting something on the stroller that says, I'm kicking cancer!! For the occassional judgemental person, this will answer their question on why you're going in the wheelchair entrances.

In 09, we had our twin, almost 2 yr olds. They are both autistic & use the stroller as wheelchair on the GAC. I only had one person snottingly tell me that I was to park the stroller & get in line like everyone else on Small World. I just ignored them & dealt with the CM.

Some people are just mean, but for the most part, people won't think twice about it.

Having something on the stroller might help the very rare comment & you should be celebrating!!!!

My husband had a t-shirt that said "My Child is Autistic, questions welcomed, parenting advise is not!"........lol That seemed effective......

Enjoy your trip, don't worry about someone looking strangely, if someone actually has the nerve to be snotty with you.......tell them to thank God they have a healthy child & leave it at that!

 

[LavenderPeach]

For everyone person that doesn't understand or gives you a "look" there is someone else out there that can relate to what you're going through.

Good point! My DS (5 1/2) also has high functioning autism and looks very "normal". We put him in a stroller every time we go and we've never had anyone look at us funny. Now, I'm sure people thought we were horrible parents the time we tried to encourage DS to try a tiny bite of ice cream and he had a complete fit about it, lol. He has major feeding issues (feeding tube until age 4 so he is just now learning how to eat) so it was a scary situation for him. The people around us probably wondered what we were torturing our son with. Yup, just trying to get him to eat ice cream, lol.

There may be a few judgemental people you come across but for the most part, people will probably just mind their own business.

My husband had a t-shirt that said "My Child is Autistic, questions welcomed, parenting advise is not!"........lol That seemed effective......

What a great t-shirt! I love it!

 

[mama2dutchies]

My husband had a t-shirt that said "My Child is Autistic, questions welcomed, parenting advise is not!"........lol That seemed effective......

Best.Shirt.EVER!!!

 

[PatMcDuck]

I know your "pain"! My son with Downs and Autism is easy, people can see at a glance something is going on. Although it is the autism that is his biggest issue in some ways, the low muscle tone from the DS makes him tire easy, and he has vision and balance problems, and more. People expect him to act like most DS people, and he does not.....

But I understand how you feel because my now 19 year old daughter went thru chemo and steroids for a blood disorder (went bald, got quite thin, etc), but the kicker was more steroids later causing severe bone damage in her hips and knees. Right now, she is waiting for double knee replacement surgery in June, and she is 19 years old. The last few years in the parks she has needed a GAC, and she does not "look like" she does (hair is back, etc). I was worried when she went to the parks with her cousin, 2 teens with a GAC in hand. I figure people judged them as teen age scammers, who would think a teen had the knees of a senior citizen? But I just let it go, and she did ok.

So don't worry! Have a great trip!

 

[perlster]

Sometimes you might take note of bigger kids in strollers.

 

[rmom]

I wouldn't worry about what others think. I have 2 Sn daughters who leave me no time to worry about what others think.
I would call Disney and tell them what is going on. Since he is in treatment, he may be able to get a GAC that lets him on right away, instead of just using an alternate entrance. You might need a doctor's note for that.

Have a great trip.

 

[DizNee Luver]

I wouldn't worry about what others think. I have 2 Sn daughters who leave me no time to worry about what others think.
I would call Disney and tell them what is going on. Since he is in treatment, he may be able to get a GAC that lets him on right away, instead of just using an alternate entrance. You might need a doctor's note for that.

Have a great trip.

The CM's will never ask for a doctors note, as they're not medical trained. Just go in to City Hall & let them know what's going on & they will stamp the GAC for what would be appropriate. Let them know about being in the sun & the possibility of fits if in line too long. The GAC's are done on an honesty system......most people are truthful in their needs.

 

[Krissy Marissy]

Please do not worry about what others will think. We go once a week and if I saw you guys waiting to board at the exit with a child I wouldn't have rude thoughts...more like having to hold myself back from hugging a stranger lol So many people look "fine" when they are ill and it's not uncommon to see ill looking people at the parks too. My sister came to WDW for my wedding just shortly after finishing her radiation treatments and she was so proud that her hair was growing back that she didn't wear her wig one day. People looked at her funny because she looked like she had shaved her head for fun, and it killed me because I wanted to punch people in the face....BUT I decided not to let it bother us. Just enjoy your trip. Live in your own little world there and let the others do their thing. I hope you guys have a super magical time!

 

[Cagirl767]

First I wanted to say how sorry I am for all that you're going through.

I do think most parents now realize that there are kids around and adults too with varying situations in varying degrees.

My dd just turned 4 and is the height of a 7 year old. She will be in a stroller at DLR. People do assume her age, that I do know. A rather curt employee at a zoo here was a little miffed that she couldn't read a sign. I so wanted to snap at him, "she's only 3!" He would have been embarrassed. But I didn't want to potentially ruin our day, so I just ignored it and laughed inside to myslef at his foolishness. Things do happen, even with employees, but I just have to learn to ignore it before it even happens. Just keep focused on your fun vacation and ignore those around you. But like someone else said, most people are too busy doing their own thing to really care. (Just wanted to note though: there's a huge difference between commenting about someone's age vs. having a disability or behavioral issue)

The decorating the stroller idea is great!

Have a fabulous time!

 

[jernysgirl]

Sometimes you might take note of bigger kids in strollers.

That really shows the weight capacity of the DLR strollers!

 

[jenpace]

One thing for sure, having a child who LOOKS healthy has made my perspectives change. A lot of people have hidden diseases. It just really bites that my child is one of them...

I couldn't have said it better myself. My 8 y/o daughter looks perfectly able-bodied but has a connective tissue disorder which means that she has very little stamina and a day at DL, even waiting in an average attraction queue would be impossible without a wheelchair.

I'm so glad to read that other parents with bigger kids in stroller haven't had to deal with much negativity but my daughter has. We have a great Mountain Buggy Urban jogger type stroller that she still totally fits in and we had the "stroller as wheelchair" GAC. After our last two or three trips to the DLR we ended up purchasing a wheelchair for her because of the mean comments from people...adults mostly but the one occasion that had her in tears for hours it was a few teenage girls laughing and pointing at her. Gotta love mean teenage girls Anyway, I found a nice wheelchair online for very little $$ and she couldn't be happier with it. No more staring, rude glances or comments.

If other peoples' opinions and possible reactions to your son won't bother you or him then using the stroller is the most practical option. I just wanted to share our experience as it's unfortunately very different than what most people have posted.

I hope you guys have a wonderful time. He's a lucky kid to have a great mom like you