Child Support issue

[pezpam]

Definitely talk to your state's child support division if they're involved. They'll know what sort of things he might be trying to pull and why - and how to deal with it. They (or a lawyer) should also be able to tell you whether, in your particular situation, the $15K really is all you're likely to get or if you can realistically get the full amount.

I'd start with the CS division and a chat with a good lawyer. (Let the lawyer know that, for the moment, you're looking only for advice and just want to pay for a consultation.) I have *zero* sympathy for anyone who avoids CS payments for 12 years, but each case can be so different that you need someone familiar with your local laws giving you sound advice. Don't sign anything before you get that advice.

Good luck!

 

[writersblock42]

talk to an attorney

 

[tmarquez]

I work for child support, but in FL. As a mom...the first thing I would do is make sure he REALLY didn't win the lottery or come into a large settlement, it happens all the time.

If not...then you need to make a judgement call. What are your chances of ever getting the total 33k? What are your chances of ever getting another cent out of him (he's obviously been good at avoiding paying)?

15k is a good chunk of change. Now I know it's nowhere near what it costs to raise a child, but it is ALOT more than ALOT of moms (and dads, and grandparents) ever get from the noncustodial parent.

In Florida, as long as you have never received cash assistance from the state, you may accept the 15k and give him credit for the rest, this would bring his arrears to 0...but ongoing support will continue to add up.

Personally, I would take it and run (as long as there's no lottery or settlement in the works). If he's avoided paying for 12 years, he knows how to work the system.

 

[eeyorefan67]

His wages are garnished he moved around alot so they had trouble finding him.
He said he just had surgery and wont be able to pay anything because he is on welfare so if I dont take this I wont get anything. I had been getting money for the past 2 years and now I havent rec. anything for 2 months. I just think its strange no contact for 12 yrs not even a b-day card for my son and now he can come up with this money.I dont think he would have the money deposited into his account he would have someone else send it to us. sons father has lied in the past about assests.

Do you know what kind of surgery he had? Just a thought...maybe he got in a car accident and is trying to get a settlement from the insurance company, but trying to pay you off first, so he can get the whole settlement for himself. Before excepting the 15,000 I would try to investigate this somemore. Something sounds fishy about him.

If anybody can help out with how to get money from a deatbeat, I would really appreciate it. He owes 60,000+ and I know he owns property. How do I put a lien on his property?

 

[pjhootch]

You must talk to a lawyer, even if is the child support recovery attorney. Everyone here means well, but this is an area where you need to have legal advice.

It is entirely possible to settle a child support obligation. If you accept the 15K instead of the 33K and sign an agreement, it can be legally binding. Our CSRU accept these kinds of agreements all the time. Money owed to the state to repay medical or fip payments made for the children can not be settled or released, but money to the custodial parent CAN be settled between the parties. Keep in mind I am only talking about my own state, but it certainly does work this way in some other states.

If the child support agency has put a lien against his house or other property, he won't be able to sell it without paying child support. There are many reasons he may be asking for a settlement... driver's license revocation, business license revocation, possible contempt or prison time if he owes money in a state where non-payment of support is a felony. All those are excellent reasons for him to borrow money from family to offer a settlement. That doesn't mean you need to take it. His days of running may be coming to a close because some states are getting better and better at collecting from dead beat parents.

Good luck.

 

[gonemousin']

Another vote for talking to child support services and an attorney. Why in the world would he neglect his child (emotionally and financially) for 12 years and then beg his family, all of a sudden, and out of the blue, to "loan" him $15K to settle his child support debt? Trust me - it's not out of the kindness of his heart...if I were a betting person, I'd put my money on him having ulterior motives that only benefit himself. Please don't agree to anything until you get some solid professional advice. Your child deserves it.

 

[Benducci]

TALK TO AN ATTORNEY BEFORE YOU DO ANYTHING!!!! You are owed the money & why should he get off only paying you a part. Something smells in Denmark - call him on it!

 

[Goofyluver]

I decided to forgo my son's father's debt in exchange for him relinquishing his parental rights. It was worth it for me. You need to think about if this will be worth it for you...something is better than nothing. Good luck!

 

[Disney Doll]

Another vote for talking to child support services and an attorney. Why in the world would he neglect his child (emotionally and financially) for 12 years and then beg his family, all of a sudden, and out of the blue, to "loan" him $15K to settle his child support debt? Trust me - it's not out of the kindness of his heart...if I were a betting person, I'd put my money on him having ulterior motives that only benefit himself. Please don't agree to anything until you get some solid professional advice. Your child deserves it.

This is a very wise post.

 

[ChrisLei]

I would not do ANYTHING without seeing the child support agency or a lawyer. He likes avoiding the law. So more than likely as someone previously stated, the money will most definitely be coming from someone else. Remember recieving a large amount of money like this has to be disclosed to the IRS and you will get taxed. Since the money is coming from someone other than you ex, there is no way of proving that this was untaxable child support money. He wants to settle this pronto, he has a bigger and better thing coming. He is probably ready to get a big settlement and doesn't want to lose $33,000. Less than half doesn't hurt as much. Any money says he is getting something HUGE and as all deadbeats he doesnt want his ex getting more of his precious money.

 

[jessica52877]

I would take it. You might never see a dime if you don't. Put it in savings and earn interest. Something is better then nothing.

 

[WDmommyof4]

I persoanlly would take it. Child support enforcement stinks, and has done nothing to help me get child support. First they said they couldn't find him, so I tracked him down myself and gave them his work information then they closed my case, and said I would have to start back over. They ahve done that to me three times now, and everytime I go in the treat me like I have done something wrong and shouldn't be asking my ex husband for support. I ahve a 6,5 and 3 year old from him, and I haven't seen a diime in 2 and a half years. If I were you I would take the money, or you will probably never get anything. Hey look at it this way. You have managed to make it this long without his help, so if you can get $15,000 I would count that as a blessing. I know it stinks to think you should be getting more, but if you refuse him what is the likely hood of you ever seeing the whole $33,000 anyways?