Charitable Donation as Gift?

[crazyme5kids]

I think it's a great idea. I tell people to make a donation to a charity instead of giving me a gift all the time. So far no one has listened. I am going to do this for my friend/boss (childcare director). I've been looking and have decided on Heifer International. I think she will really like it. I am also oing to get "a share" of an animal for each of my children for Christmas.

For my parents, I am going to make a donation to our local dog pound. I'll also give them a little something else like a restaurant gift certificate, but I know they will like not getting more stuff.

 

[MomofKatie]

We are donating to Heifer International in DD's teacher's name this year- the kids did a Social Studies unit on community involvement, and they collected and filled shoeboxes for Billy Graham's ministry. I didn't contribute much to the effort, because of my views on religious missionary work camoflaged as charity (and making it a school project- what about the seperation of church and state?), but I felt bad that I wasn't doing something to show that we do care about people around the world who don't have as much as we do.
So, I felt this gift would make her feel good about giving back to the community, and make me feel good about which charitable organization was getting my support.

 

[LakeAriel]

I have been giving to Drs Without Borders for my MIL/FIL for years. They are well off and our previous gifts were always useless trinkets. They love the donation idea and I use it with Make A Wish for other relatives also. Young children want "stuff", people who are well off should be delighted by this. Someone asked why not just donate instead of using it as a gift. I give whenever I can. At Christmas I couldn't afford to buy everyone gifts AND give to charity. The needy won out.

 

[monarchsfan16]

My grandparents asked us to donate money to "something" in their name a few years ago for Christmas. We've done so without them asking every year since. We chose Make a Wish the first year, because it just seemed to fit them right. They loved the fact that we chose Make A Wish, so we now make a donation in Grampa's name to that one every year, and have started making a donation in Grammy's name to Smile Train. Smile Train fixes cleft palates of children around the world, who couldn't afford the surgery otherwise. My mom picked them because my grammy adores young kids and loves making them smile.
I think that it probably depends on the person the gift is being made in honor of, but I think it's a pretty special gift, if the giver really thinks about what would mean a lot to the person.

 

[Chuck S]

If you know the peson well, and give to a charity that you know THEY support, whether you personally support it or not, I think it is a wonderful gift. If, on the other hand you give to YOUR favorite charity, but it is not something the "recipient" would normally support or give a donation to, I think it is tacky.

 

[LakeAriel]

If you know the peson well, and give to a charity that you know THEY support, whether you personally support it or not, I think it is a wonderful gift. If, on the other hand you give to YOUR favorite charity, but it is not something the "recipient" would normally support or give a donation to, I think it is tacky.

Good point! I wouldn't give to the ASPCA in honor of someone who didn't like animals! That would almost be a slap in the face. Fortunately most people I "gift" are of similiar philosophy.

 

[jackskellingtonsgirl]

Friends of ours put donations to AMFAR on their wish list every year. For folks who really have all they need I think a donation in their honor is lovely. But I would make the donation to the charity of THEIR choice, not mine.

There is no reason you can't ask someone what their favorite charities are.

One year for DS's birthday we asked everyone to make a donation to their favorite charity and write a card to DS explaining why they chose that particular charity. It was very cool. DS is very fortunate and he has more stuff than any child needs. He was able to learn a little about the things that are important to his family and friends and we didn't end up with MORE toys.

 

[lulugirl]

If you know the peson well, and give to a charity that you know THEY support, whether you personally support it or not, I think it is a wonderful gift. If, on the other hand you give to YOUR favorite charity, but it is not something the "recipient" would normally support or give a donation to, I think it is tacky.

I absolutely agree!

 

[KathyTX]

If you know the peson well, and give to a charity that you know THEY support, whether you personally support it or not, I think it is a wonderful gift. If, on the other hand you give to YOUR favorite charity, but it is not something the "recipient" would normally support or give a donation to, I think it is tacky.

Exactly!

Giving to an organization that the recipient is involved with or is very close to would be a very nice and thoughtful gesture.

But to give to a random charity or one that you're interested in but that means little to the recipient really isn't a gift to them at all.

 

[minkydog]

We do this in my family but not in Dhs family. Why? Because my sibs and I have everything we need and we like to help others. DH family likes to open trinkets and they have little interest in charity. The trick is, you have to make sure the recipient thinks it's a great idea or it's just a big bomb.

My sibs and I have been doing it for years. Usually I choose something that is important to that person--DSis gets an animal donated to a poor family because she has a farm and loves her sheep; DBro got cash to buy soccer balls to take to Venezuela with him at Christmas;other DSis will get a donation to the Red Cross to commemorate all they did for her during Hurrican Katrina; DMother will get a donation to a children's charity to help disabled kids because she has a soft heart for her 5 grandkids with disabilities;Other Dsis is getting a donkey donated to a poor family in Latin America(mainly because her DH is an @$$--shhh, don't tell her that!)

I also gave each family a copy of an old picture I found with the 5 of us together with our beloved St. Bernard taken when we were under 12. It cost me about $4 total and they will love it.

I canned some delicious soup for my mother because she no longer cooks--she'll love that much more than powder or perfume.

On the other hand, I would not try this out on a friend unless I had first talked about it with her. Too much potential for hurt feelings.

 

[SqueakyMouse]

You ought to hear my dh's stories about his Christmas' as a child. His very wealthy (and more than slightly crazy) great-aunt always gave a donation (can't remember where) in dh's name at Christmas time. Now, my dh has always been socially-minded (he is a glorified social worker, after all); but this was not a real exciting gift for a little boy! In fact, he found the wrapped up toilet paper given by this great aunt to his mom one year to be far more entertaining!

 

[Disney Doll]

I thought that at one time, too....until I saw utter disappointment of the face of a dear friend. I'd given in their name to a dog rescue (they'd gotten their very own dog there!) and was soooo sure they'd be thrilled. NOT! Just goes to show you never know people.

No offense to your friend, but I really have to wonder about peole to whom material things are so very important, similar to my SIL. If someone donated to a dog rescue in my honor, I'd be thrilled!!!!!!

 

[Disney Doll]

FYI I didn't check up on the gift. What is rude is for them to not accept the gift I gave them. That money is now sitting in some companies bank account earning them interest. It's not been "used" for anything. IF they wanted to be so rude as to not accept my gift then they should have refused it, given it to someone else or at least had the decency not to tell everyone they know (behind our backs) how they hoped we wouldn't get them this gift again this year. Personally, I'd love to tell them how rude they are but I'm trying to keep some peace in this family.

Sounds like a donation is in order for you with regard to these people. If they talk about you behind your back, so be it...they'll look small. And the money won't be wasted.

 

[Disney Doll]

On the other hand, I would not try this out on a friend unless I had first talked about it with her. Too much potential for hurt feelings.

But why would it hurt feelings??? That's what I don't understand. Unless you are someone who has nothing, is another $12.99 sweater, Christmas knick-knack, bottle of wine or candle that important to you????

I really don't understand....

 

[minniecarousel]

I have a sister-in-law whose birthday is Christmas Eve. I always give her a gift for her birthday (never mind that she & my brother rarely even remember to send me a card!) This year, I have bought a very inexpensive pink, stretchy bracelet with a Breast Cancer Awareness charm on it. I will be making a donation to the Susan G. Komen Foundation in her honor, since she had radiation this past year for breast cancer. Seems like a proper gift to me!

 

[clh2]

We did this for my parents 2 years ago. My parents have everything they need, they really don't lack for anything. They do not need more "stuff" for the sole purpose of us finding an x-mas present for them.

They are very involved with their church, my Dad is the church treasurer, my mom in the choir.

Their church went through a capital fund-raising project to raisse money for a pipe organ, and the required rennovations to put install the organ.

As production of a pipe organ is a lengthy process, they stopped by the plant when the pipe organ was in production (I think it took close to a year for it to be built) when they were going on a vacation.

They really did appreciate the donation we made in their honor for the pipe organ. Now, we were well aware that this donation was also tax deductible, so we doubled the amount of money for this donation than we would have spent on a gift.

We did not do this in advance, we gave my parents the check along with a certificate we made explaining what the donation was for. (Since my Dad was the treasurer - we couldn't really do this early - he would have found out.)

I would be careful about this type of gift...I would never do a gift to MY favorite charity, I would absolutely make sure it would be a charity that the gift recipient would have a keen interest in.

 

[Amy]

If you know the peson well, and give to a charity that you know THEY support, whether you personally support it or not, I think it is a wonderful gift. If, on the other hand you give to YOUR favorite charity, but it is not something the "recipient" would normally support or give a donation to, I think it is tacky.

I agree with this. My MIL (very staunch Catholic) will send us a card saying that some monks in some monastery someplace I never heard of will remember us during some mass. We are not Catholic, so this means absolutely nothing to us. Now if she had donated money to the Komen Foundation or to our local Animal Rescue League (where we got both of our dogs), THAT would be a meaningful gift for us.

 

[Pooh Girl 71]

FYI I didn't check up on the gift. What is rude is for them to not accept the gift I gave them. That money is now sitting in some companies bank account earning them interest. It's not been "used" for anything. IF they wanted to be so rude as to not accept my gift then they should have refused it, given it to someone else or at least had the decency not to tell everyone they know (behind our backs) how they hoped we wouldn't get them this gift again this year. Personally, I'd love to tell them how rude they are but I'm trying to keep some peace in this family.

Well, if they talked trash about the restaurant gift card, I can only imagine what they would say about a gift to a charity. You can never please some people and I wouldn't even get them a gift this year.

But, I do think a contribution to a charity of their choice is a great present.

 

[PrincessKitty]

I did this for my parents one year (after being told for YEARS and YEARS, "We don't need anything, just get us a card, etc., etc.). In addition to gifts, I gave them each a card that said I had made a donation in their names to a charity (I forget which one). My mother was visibly disappointed (she was the one who always said I shouldn't buy her anything ), and my father was absolutely thrilled.

I would love to receive a gift of a donation to charity, IF it was a charity I believed in (yes, I made sure the charity I donated to for my parents was one they liked ).

 

[Buckalew11]

I have been given several gifts for Christmas from clients that were donations made in my name to that group who gives animals to people in foreign countries like ducks, chickens, goats etc. I thought it was so cool. I was honored.