Canadian Buffoon's Hi Low Vacation - South Central Musings

[orangecats2]

I stripped down right there.

boxers or briefs?

I will now be bringing two pairs of jeans…
And two pairs of shorts.

Finally!!!

 

[pkondz]

Police were dispatched when a melee broke out at the senior citizens center yesterday evening. Five people reported serious gumming injuries.

There's nothing more horrific
than a gumming injury.

A mall? You shouldn't have.

Oh, it was no problem!
You're welcome!!!

Pictures of a mall. You're amazing.

I know, right?!?!?!?

This is similar to saying a quesadilla is like a pizza. Don't make me dock you poin--oh, right.

Oh, go ahead....
Lucky for me, I don't put
people with negative points
on the list.

Nah, we have the Titanic.

Would you believe the Mayflower?

Sigh.

Fine. We have a kayak in the Dick's Sporting Goods store.

Thanks Max.

Sounds like Captain Jack Sparrow was at the helm.

I suppose he could find the end of the world...

Why would you get rid of those? Think of all the time you could spend in there while the wife is shopping for clothes.

I think you answered your own question.

Is it wrong to laugh at someone else's expense?

Yes. It's despicable.
Only a truly horrible person would...



oh.

Awesome! Best feature yet!

I mean... ya gotta have one.

Yep. You're still amazing.

Aw... Thanks Mark!

I thought you would have known better by now.

Sorry, hon, all they had were muffins...

Uh, huh.
You don't know Ruby.
"Where's your muffin?"
"Uh..... I ate mine. Couldn't wait."
"Why do you have Danish crumbs on your shirt?"

Who hasn't been there?

We all have, dude.... we all have.

Remind me again why you left Disney World?

They didn't have any oven mitts.

I may never go back.

I hear he once made a guy go all the way to Podunk, North Dakota and then stood him up!

Just a rumour.
Don't believe everything you read.

Crap. I didn't think you could see me.

I have a very good telescope.

Wow. I could definitely get used to scenery like that.

It gets better.

But did I take any photos???

I'm gonna call that one early evening, because you could potentially be eating dinner then.

Seems unanimous so far.

Inventive use of the landscape there.

With that mountain scenery you showed in the previous photo? I'm game to stay.

The scenery just kept getting better.

Sure, 87 photos of a shopping mall, but not the actual destination. Makes sense.

Okay, now that's funny.

Ok. Now I'm with you. Fatal error, there.

I'm convinced wood-fired ovens make a difference.

I completely agree.

Is this Canada's version of the Running Of The Bulls in Pamplona?

Heh.
I almost titled this update that.

Excellent point there. Might make for some negative Yelp reviews too.

Nah.
I have never seen a negative review
from a dead person.

They're very forgiving.

Probably shouldn't have been taunting him like that.

He had it coming, showing off like that.

Well, the next step was to play dead. You didn't exhaust all of the moves in your arsenal yet.

I have a feeling if I'd played dead,
I mighta wound up dead.

7:30 a.m.

You'd think you would have exhausted these by now, but I'll say yes.

Theater.

Out this time. They're intimidated by the local rangers. And tourists.

Twice.

Prank phone call. You ask if his refrigerator is running. Can't stop giggling afterwards.

Or you put tennis balls on the ends of his antlers. I dunno.

If they're about Disney? No. National Parks? No. Malls? Um....

Noted.

I'm a state worker. I didn't try very hard. Would've had to put my shovel down.

We can't have that!

I'm calling this, "Me at Thanksgiving Dinner" (the correct one, in November)

This I believe!

(That it's you...
you still got the date wrong.)

 

[pkondz]

I did!!!!! Not only did I live to tell about it, I think I'm better for it, too!

Well, of course you're better for it.

I wrote it just for you!
(and... maybe a few others....)

Like that do you?

 

[pkondz]

It is fairly long. And I didn't even research for the list, yet!

Well get crackin'!

Yes. or maybe knighthood?

I think that would be a minimum, don't you?

Everyone has days where they err in judgement. ( did I use that correctly? )

Well, as they say in Disney:
To err is human; to cut in, go back in line!

 

[pkondz]

Trying to get back to the boards.

Well, hello stranger!
Welcome back!

We moved and it's almost been 2 1/2 weeks now

Tough job isn't it?
We've done it... four times now.

Each time is stressful.

I'll try and come back to comment when I can.

No worries.
Love to see you again,
but get that life's busy.

I absolutely missed everyone and how awesome Ponzi is!!!!

Awww.... Thanks!

 

[Terra Nova guy]

Oh, God... the horror.
I may never get in the water again.

Oh the horror! Death by gumming. (Yes, I see now that Mark already used that joke. I never claimed to be original)

One was, I wanted to take some photos of the mall.
For you people.
The things I do for you!

Really, you’re too kind. Dare I even say wonderful, astonishing, astounding, remarkable, incredible, marvellous. I would say amazing but that may be taking it too far.

I sashayed over to the mini golf.
It's not the greatest,
and I remember playing it about
140 years ago.

They didn't have real putters back then.
We used petrified snakes.
And acorns instead of golf balls.

I was thinking wooden sticks and goose eggs. They probably wouldn’t have had blue cacti on the course back then.

Every mall has a replica of the Santa Maria in it, right?

Nope. We just have a broken gum ball machine and buddy from the Lions Club selling tickets on a Ford Focus.

It may have been the first time either of us
had ever been in a wave pool.

I haven’t gone back to a wave pool since 2008. We were at Typhoon Lagoon. Of course they have the massive tsunami wave that comes through every so often. Oldest DD was just 8 at the time. First time the tsunami came we were both unprepared. I was holding her hand, but not tight enough. She got knocked down, slipped out of my hand, and was dragged along the bottom. Both knees and thigh on one side completely scraped up. A trip to first aid and a (free) sympathy Mickey bar later we left Typhoon Lagoon and have not returned since. Just for fun, I’ll even give you a picture. I can’t remember how many days after this was taken, but you can kind of see the bruising on one knee and a bandage still on the other. (I probably took the wind out of your TR sails a bit with that story, but your wave pool story reminded me of it.)

Actually, I really didn't mind.
She was enjoying herself
and that's all that mattered.

Ah yes, the inevitable “we’re on vacation and I’m going shopping so you stand around and carry the bags” situation. Every now and then, there’s a store that has the good sense to place a little beacon of light in the corner – an armchair. I don’t mind those places so much.

I even bought myself some new oven mitts.
(Also high on the list of things guys do.)

Should I admit to being the one who bought a Mickey apron on our last trip to the World?

The A&W chain in Canada has been
unaffiliated with the US chain since 1972.
Ours sell mainly burgers.
You can't find any with hot dogs anymore
I don’t think.
But they do still have the best Root Beer

I think you’re right. I remember loving the hot dogs as a kid. I don’t go there often, but I don’t remember the last time I had a frosty mug either. It really is a crime.

We arrived in Jasper at ten after five in the afternoon.
Or is that early evening by then?

It’s clearly early evening if it’s after five. But then everything is a half hour later in Newfoundland, so what do I know?

How cute is that?

Fantastic little lodge. They really fit a lot into a small space. It looks pretty well kept up.

After lugging in the suitcases
(but not the food. It was cool enough
that I left it in the trunk.
Nature's refrigerator.)

That’s one of the few benefits of our Canadian winters. You can go to the store any time and buy milk and a chicken and not worry about getting home before it spoils.

Questions, next round:

1. Sure. Why not. It's a trend.
What time do we get up?

2. Do we go in a gift shop?

3. We watch a movie.
In a theater? On the TV? On the iPad?

4. Elk. We see more.
In town or out?

5. Haven't asked this for a while.
Do I get asked for directions?
Of course I do.
How many times?
I'll narrow it down.
Less than five times.

6. How do I get revenge
on that elk?

7. Are these chapters too long?

1. 7:45am
2. Yes
3. On TV
4. Out of town
5. Yes, two times
6. By showing him the packs of elk droppings disguised as candy they sell in the gift shop. He wants a cut of the profits.
7. Of course not. A bit of extra length can’t be a bad thing.

I didn’t really look. I’m usually so pleasantly enthralled in reading your exquisite exposition that I only go back to look after your little reminder.

Have a great trip down to California. I hope you get to meet up with your DIS friends!

 

[franandaj]

OK I'm caught up everywhere else. Yours is the next TR I comment on, but we're out tonight, I'm sneaking in commenting on your TR while Fran is in the restroom....

Have a good trip! See ya on the halfway side!

 

[MAGICFOR2]

Oh those waves! My first time in an ocean you could actually swim in was in Huntington Beach in LA. DH and his grandpa sat on the beach and laughed while I kept getting plowed down, wave after wave. I was about 26 at the time. They finally had pity on me and told me the secret. I guess it was cheap entertainment for them.

Have a great trip! I will be back with answers, maybe from the airport. Have a great meet up!

 

[Mrs T 2009]

I'm going to be away for the weekend, BUT wanted to say, have a blast with Kay!!!! It'll be so much fun! Can't wait to hear about it!!

 

[pkondz]

The Edmonton airport sent us coupons in the mail, and one of them was for the Cookies by George in the main terminal - buy 6 cookies, get 6 free. You better believe I was all over that! Mmm, those gluten-free chocolate macaroons

That would be a very dangerous coupon.
I'd eat the entire dozen.

Milk chocolate chunk.... Oh, God...

This trip report just got weird for me. I'll be sure to do a trip report next time I go to Winnipeg, just for you haha.

Looking forward to it!
In a weird sort of way.

So, when I was a kid I was obsessed with the idea of the WEM. I lived on the other side of the country, out in the Maritimes, but whenever my parents would ask me about family trips, I never once asked for Disney - nope, I was the weird kid who asked to go to Edmonton to visit the mall .

Uh, huh.

Ask me where we went for our honeymoon...

I remember the first time I went there (when I was 20) I was practically jumping up and down with excitement. Then, when I moved to Edmonton when I was 22 I took a job at the mall just so I could be there all the time...these days I'm lucky if I go there twice a year. I'm so over it haha.

Funny how that works out.

You're amazing, but only because you're from the same city as my fiance

Whadya mean "only"!!!!

That food court looks so nice now! It was completely re-done not too long ago, so for awhile you would sit down to eat there, look up and see wires and stuff hanging out of the ceiling...

Makes for a less than pleasant
dining experience.

Ugh. This is where I worked for 6 months. Word of advice - don't work at a waterpark.

Great.
Now I have to come up with
a whole new retirement plan!

Of course, everyone stops in Edson on the way to Jasper. They have a Wendy's!

But.... we already ate A&W!

I hope you watched your speed going through Hinton, they love their photo radar in that town...not that I'm speaking from experience or anything...

I'm good.
I almost never speed.

Well.... I always drive about
7-8 k above the limit.

Not fast enough to get ticketed.

I'm an old person, if I had it my way I'd eat supper at 5pm and be in bed by 9pm every night. So 5:10 = early evening.

1. You're not an old person.
2. This is so far a 100% evening crowd.

I've never heard of this place. I guess most of my recent trips to Jasper have been just driving through though, it's been awhile since we've stayed there. I just looked it up on a map - great location!

It was really nice being out on the edge of town.

I like the green chairs! And the wood burning fireplace. And the walls. Ugh, fine - I'm originally a small town girl and this kind of looks like places some of my family members actually live (except obviously they have actual bedrooms).

Bad news. The fire place only looks
like it's wood burning.
It's faux electric.

Oh God. There's so many!

Oh really?


Hadn't noticed.

No kidding!

I rave about this place to anyone who will listen! There's all kinds of them here in Edmonton, and they are by far my favourite pizza. The BBQ chicken pizza is amazing. And oh my God - the prosciutto wrapped mozza balls - go on a Wednesday night and they are only $2 each. Oh, and the banana-nutella dessert pizza...Damn it! Now I want Famoso!

I would go back there any day.

And.... did you get some?

Their Rossini's are pretty fantastic as well. And they used to have this cocktail with cucumbers in it - I've ordered pitchers of that before....

You drank a pitcher of cocktails???

The whole thing with the elk is hilarious. I'm surprised you didn't mention stopping shortly after you entered the National Park to see the mountain goats. They love to climb those rocks just past the Pocahontas Cabins, and there's always a bunch of vehicles pulled over on the side of the road to take pictures of them.

Dang it!
I didn't know about that.

I have never seen one.
And I want to!

You guys sleep in! Jasper is a quiet little town, and you managed to sleep until 8:30am.

Ha! Of course you do, they are unavoidable in Jasper.

I've never actually been to the movie theater in Jasper, but I know they have one. I'm going to say you went there.

Those things are everywhere. I'll say both in town and out.

Three. At least one of those people were driving one of those rental RV's that you see everywhere.

You barmp your car horn.

Nah, they're fine.

Noted.

This GIF makes me laugh every time. That poor guy!

 

[pkondz]

I am SO far behind! And I was dragging my you know what and didn't get my guesses in. Bad Bad girl.

Sorry about that.
Were you dragging your foot?
Is that what you meant?

I know I was in the top 10 with points but I think Liesa might run away with this one.

Still time to catch her.
One mis-step by her...
One good move by someone else...

I didn't mean to bail on here for awhile but daughter was home on Spring Break. The house has a different feel to it when we get to see and chat with her.

Oh, I get it. No worries.

I will admit that when people disappear,
I always worry a bit.

But that's an excellent reason.

Also hubby and I on the 16th (Thurs) did our over night stay in the Dells at the casino for my b-day weekend. Then on our way home Friday we stopped at a theater with reclining seat and saw Beauty and The Beast. We liked it!

Nice!
And Happy Belated Birthday!

We have people on vacation at work so I've been going in early all this week.

Just out of curiosity,
define "early".

So I wanted to make sure I get on here to tell you HI and wish you a wonderful celebration with Kay.

Hi!
And thanks!

She's one lucky girl.... Dad who takes her on trips and she had the best month to have a b-day. Can't wait to here about your adventures and you DISmeet.

Coming to a TR near you..... some day.

I have to be honest and say I'm a little jealous that I can't magically join you, Allison and Liesa I regret not being able to stop by the Ditch and hang out with them. But I was glad that I can say that the famous Steppesister was the first person from here I got to MIRL

Oh! You got to meet Liesa!
That's nice.

Anything I should know before I meet her next week?

You can tell me.
You know... just between you and me.

 

[pkondz]

Sure, it's always cute when they're little...

What... you're saying a grown hippo
isn't cute?

You're amazing!

Why thank you!
And completely unsolicited, too!

And this is one of the reasons that you are amazing!

Mmmmm, too bad you missed lunch at Mountain Steak & Pizza. I mean, it was great decades ago, I'm sure it's still fantastic!

What the hey!
First goats and now this....


Why aren't you people telling me
these things before I go?!?!?

That's early evening around these parts.

<sigh> I get the feeling
that this question didn't really need
to be asked.

I generally stand on floors, sometimes on the ground, and apparently not very well on stairs.

8:30 - all that fresh mountain air

Of course you do!

On TV. (Romance lives!)

Both!

Twice

I hope not by eating any "elk droppings"...

Never!

Noted.

By photo 2 I was looking for any strange visitors to West Ed, but didn't see any anywhere!

Not unless I accidentally caught
my reflection somewhere.

 

[pkondz]

We're leaving Saturday too.
Can't wait! Although I guess I must.

For Disneyland?

If so, and you see us,
make sure you say hi!

I haven't answered the contest yet but I wanted to wish you a great vacation

Thanks!

I was just there last month and had a great time. Don't forgot about the Dole Whips.

Oh, I don't think you have to worry about that!

Enjoy Judy

I'm sure if you were there this month
we'd enjoy Judy too.

Bwahahaha!!!

In case you couldn't tell, that was about packing two pairs of jeans and shorts this time.

Oh... shush, you.

We've been having weird weather. I'm sure you'd think it's shorts weather but we think it's long pants and long shirts weather. Several weeks ago it was nice 70s and 80s. Now we're back to 60s, which for you is still shorts weather.

Well, of course it is.
One wears shorts when it's hot.

Oooooooooooooooooooooh crap.

Too hot?

Well now that I look at the 10 day forecast they say it's going to be back in the 70s next week.

Hotter?
Is this possible?

Good call! You know what this means though. Now, because you packed two each, no doubt you'll be incident-free.

Oh, I'm quite sure of that.

Hope the two of you have a WONDERFUL time!!!!!! Safe travels and cannot wait to hear all about it.

Thanks, Tracy!!

 

[Steppesister]

I'm an 80's girl .... in so many ways.

I better pick up a sweater.

 

[pkondz]

I lost all my quotes.

Ugh. Sorry. I know how that is.

I just lost all the points I'd
been tracking up to a few posts ago.

I'm so sorry, but I don't have time to go over them again

Totally get it.
No worries.

(my 2 year old just dumped M&M's all over the floor) so I will have to remember from what I just read.

I'm shocked you can get on here at all!

The baby hippo is darling.

I know, right!

You are AMAZING!

Awwwww.... shucks.

I loved your pictures of the mall. I thought the food court shot was great. I love that there is a waterpark and amusement park in the mall. What a fun place!

It's a pretty cool place
for a mall.
Must admit.

Although, you thinking Ruby drowning was comical was awful!

Well, if she had drowned...
The TR would've been a bit different.



Not much... but a bit.

The picture of the mountains is beautiful.

Thanks!
I think I'll have more.

I love that there was an elk walking with you. I'm sure it was terrifying though. I bet it was huge.

Not really terrifying.
Well, maybe for Ruby.

I knew we were fine as long
as I kept the car between us.

Your bridge shot is my favorite shot so far. Absolute perfection!

Isn't that pretty?

Oh, and I consider 5 p.m. early evening.

You and everyone else!

I did cringe at the sight of your room. Although, I'm sure it was perfect for two. I'm not much of an outdoorsy person though, so a cabin is much better than a tent, oh the horror! I'm perfectly happy with modern conveniences.

You sound like Ruby.
Her idea of roughing it
is only having one Jacuzzi in the room.


And yet she loved this place.

1. 8 a.m.
2. of course
3. theater
4. out
5. 4
6. dinner
7. No way
8. I looked
Missed you!

Noted.

P.S. Hope you have a great trip. I can't wait to read all about it!

Thanks!

And you will.

 

[pkondz]

Have a great trip! I'm jealous that you all get to meet up. I had a blast at Disneyland last month.

Thanks!
Too bad you're not there this month.

Hi Pkondz
Just like to take this opertunity to wish yourself and Kay a good trip to Disneyland California.

Hey Mac. Thanks!

Are you sure only two pairs of shorts and jeans will be enough I normally take teeshirt's as well.

So you're saying you never wear underwear.
TMI, dude!

Enjoy your meet up with Steppsister and Franandaj.

I'm really looking forward to that!!

Hi Pkdonz - maybe you and Kay should plan a trip to Toronto this summer as our 2 Capybaras had 3 babies this week and they are so cute. They are going to have a name the babies contest. Parents are called Bonnie & Clyde as they escaped the Zoo last year and went on a couple of days road trip. Judy

I KNOW!!!!

How? Because Kay screamed it last night.

But.... you can't pet them there.

 

[pkondz]

boxers or briefs?

What makes you think
I was wearing anything?

Finally!!!

 

[CyndiLouWho]

For Disneyland?

If so, and you see us,
make sure you say hi!

Flight Saturday
Sunday thru Thursday in the parks. Our first time!
Hope to see you there!

 

[Captain_Oblivious]

Not enough time to reply or comment on everything. So I'll just say: the shorts story was hilarious, and I'm glad you're finally taking the hint! Have fun storming the castle!

 

[pkondz]

I know I still have a few shout-outs,
but I don't think I'll have time.

But I've read everything!

See you guys in about a week!