So much is going through my head this morning and I realize I am going through one of those phases again where I have to re-orient myself and make sure I stay committed. Last night was another "eat everything in sight" experience, and even though I knew I was doing it, I was chagrined after the fact to find that I'd had a sweet dessert and then had salty snacks, when I really wasn't hungry. Thanks to my long walk yesterday morning I had some APs to use and only hit .5 FPs, so that wasn't the issue. I was still OP and not upset about that. The real issue is having been totally conscious of what I was doing and still not halting myself. I had no desire to end the day with points left, though I could have.
I do realize a couple of things:
1. I am not going to buy these ice cream sandwiches again -- 3 pts each and they really are too big a temptation to me (even though I have not eaten more than one any one night) -- I really (unbelievable!) feel like they call out to me from the freezer!
2. I have to go back to having something ready in the fridge to munch on while I am cooking dinner for myself or the kids on Tuesday and Thursday night, when we don't get home until after 9. Otherwise I snack while dinner is cooking, then eat a large dinner because I feel so hungry, then feel like I still have to fit in dessert. Instead, I am going to get back into my habit of opening a can of green beans and having those with lemon; or slicing a cucumber, or munching on baby carrots. Then I will give myself time to feel full after dinner, and head upstairs to read, rather than "noshing". If I feel the need for dessert, I will make it something sweet that is low points, and have baggies of 1 points of pretzels pre-made so I can do my salty last food of the night without too much damage.
At some point I'll force myself to give up evening snacks/desserts in favor of having those throughout the day, but right now that is not a sacrifice I am willing to make.
Well, my partner said something incredibly nice to me today -- "This is remarkable. You are literally shrinking before my eyes. I bet you've had to make a significant investment in new clothes, right?" It was just a boost I needed today. Very sweet.
On the half-marathon front--
I have a 5K tomorrow morning. My objective is to improve my time of 49:47 from the last 5K I did. This is the same course as the 4th of July and my time that day was 50:12, so I definitely have to beat that. DD17 (tomorrow!) says she is worried about doing this, and I am still struggling with whether to do this with her or to just keep my own pace whether that is slower or faster than her. I guess I will see how it goes tomorrow morning and what DS12 (the cross country runner) decides to do. I am pretty sure, though, that he is planning to run it. I think I am likely to ask DH to go back to DD when he is done running it, since he will finish in less than 30 minutes, and he is trying to do some longer runs anyway, so hopefully, he will be willing to make tomorrow a "long run" by practically doing this twice. That way, I won't feel like we've abandoned DD but I can still stay focused on my r1/w4 intervals to see where that leaves me. I have never done that for more than 31 minutes, so I will be curious to see if I can sustain that through another 3 sets of r1/w4. I'd consider that an awesome accomplishment.
2. It occurred to me that my "training matrix" starts exactly a month from today. I am both intimidated and reluctant, though excited. The 30 minute walks the first several Mondays seem almost a step back from where I am now, but the other structured workouts will require more discipline than I have undertaken before. Getting into a routine of Sunday rest; Monday "short" walk; Tuesday cross-train; Wednesday rest; Thursday "short" walk & speed/form drills; Friday rest; Saturday "long" walk will require a lot more effort than I am putting in now and I am DETERMINED to stick with the schedule. Let's see what I am saying about all of this 5 weeks from now.
I want to go to Outback tonight for dinner, so I am doing light meals today. I have to guesstimate the points on dinner stuff for now, but will do some research before then to see if I can get a more precise count on points.
B: lite turkey on lite bread (4)
L: weight watchers bagel (2) spread with 1 wedge laughing cow lite cheese (1); garden salad (0) (NO ROLL!)
D: french onion soup (4); grilled shrimp (2); coconut shrimp (4); crab cakes (4); steamed broccoli (0)
Maybe we'll do a movie when we get home from dinner. If I have points left I will do lite popcorn (1) with no fat butter spray (0) YUMMY!
I am still in a "decade" I haven't seen since pre-October 1982 when I met DH.
I wanted to make sure I wished you good luck on the 5K tomorrow!!! I can't wait to see how you do, I am sure you will make your goal pace!!! 
and best WISHes for a wonderful 5K tomorrow! You CAN do it, Cam!!!!! 
Your support means so much to me. You are a darling to stop by my journal and share your exuberant, lovely pesonality. 
