Calling all mommies of "Irish Twins!"

[mookie]

Many of you know that I am 30 weeks pregnant and we will be having our 3rd baby very shortly. Now that the time is getting a bit closer, some things have been rolling around in my head that I wanted to get some advice on.

Right now I have a 4 year old dd, and a 10 month old ds. My ds bday is June 11, and my due date for this baby will be June 18th. I went very early with both of my other kids, so my OB is not expecting me to make it past 37 weeks with this baby. This would make me the proud mommy of Irish Twins!

I know when I first posted announcing my pregnancy, there were lots of you that had some great advice and words of encouragement. There are a few things (stupid as they may be...) that I was trying to figure out how I was going to handle. Hopefully you can help...

1. How do you go to the store? I'm not talking the mall, I can use the double stroller for Cayden and the baby, and have Madison walk. But how do you go to places where you'll need a cart, like Target and the Grocery Store? Cayden isn't walking yet, but even when he does, I wouldn't trust him to walk through a store on his own at a year! And those big carts that have the spots in the back for the kids to sit I think would be still too big for him, he'd slide through the straps. I would normally put him in the front part of the cart, and have Maddie walk - but then where do I put the new little one? And if I put the new little one in the actual cart part, where do I put all the groceries? Am I doomed to not get out of the house and will have to resort to Peapod forever?

2. Cayden's new room. We have a nursery all set up already, so that is fine. Maddie has her own room. We will be moving Cayden out of the nursery into his new room. Do we buy a whole new crib? I'm thinking of using the pack n play and swing for the baby to give Cayden enough time to grow out of the crib. But then again, he could use it for another year or more still! He is a bit rambunctious already, so I dont' know if I'd want to trust him in a toddler bed just yet. Any thoughts?

3. Many of you said to get some help. We are thinking of hiring a college student for the summer. Not full time, just here and there. If you could have your ideal situation, how would you set up their hours? A few hours a day to run whatever errands came up, or would you have them come one day a week and you just left the house for that whole day? Would it be easier for you to have that college student run your errands for you instead?

4. Which of my two kids is going to have the hardest transition (Maddie or Cayden) and what can I do to make that smoother?

Any other tips or tricks or ANY advice at all will be helpful. I know many of you said routine is key...I'd love to hear some examples. Can you tell I'm gettting in to that freakout/nesting phase?


Thanks for all the help - I might have some more questions for ya too!!

 

[sugarpie]

My kids are about 18 months apart. I'm not going to lie to you. The first year with such small children is hard.

1. Get a baby sling/carrier for grocery shopping. Keep the baby in that, the 1 year old in the cart, and the 4 year old can walk. Or better yet, go by yourself when someone can watch the kids.

2. I moved my 18 month old into a toddler bed and put the baby in the crib. The first night I was positive it wouldn't work, but she adjusted. The baby can stay in the pack n play for quite a while if that's what you go with. I wouldn't buy another crib.

3. If you get help, you should run the errands. Get away from those kids a little bit. Or take the 4 year old with you for some mommy time.

4. That's anyone's guess. Who knows?

Good luck.

 

[kfeuer]

I can't answer all your questions, but I had a suggestion for #1--get a good baby carrier (like a Baby Bjorn or a sling) and keep the baby in that while you shop. My boys are 2 years apart but I still used my sling in stores while the baby was little. He didn't like just sitting in his car seat while I shopped, but he'd be perfectly content in the sling.

Congrats on your upcoming arrival!

 

[kfeuer]

Sorry, double post

 

[shortbun]

Gosh, my son was in his crib until 3 mos short of 3 because that's where he was comfortable. I'd get another crib because leaning over into a pack and play for several months is gonna hurt your back. Can you go to a 2nd hand shop for one or borrow from someone? Our nextdoor neighbor has kids 11mos apart. They have a double stroller-front to back, not side to side. Re: groceries - can you hire a mother's helper or babysitter for an hour and a half? OR: you could go when your spouse gets home and give him some time with his children while you sit at the coffee/lunch area at the grocery and read the paper. Peapod is an excellent solution for sometimes, personally-I'd get a sitter/husband and go out on my own. Grocery shopping with one child was not fun so three(two infants) would be nearly impossible. btw, congratulations!!

 

[5Slays]

Many of you know that I am 30 weeks pregnant and we will be having our 3rd baby very shortly. Now that the time is getting a bit closer, some things have been rolling around in my head that I wanted to get some advice on.

Right now I have a 4 year old dd, and a 10 month old ds. My ds bday is June 11, and my due date for this baby will be June 18th. I went very early with both of my other kids, so my OB is not expecting me to make it past 37 weeks with this baby. This would make me the proud mommy of Irish Twins!

I know when I first posted announcing my pregnancy, there were lots of you that had some great advice and words of encouragement. There are a few things (stupid as they may be...) that I was trying to figure out how I was going to handle. Hopefully you can help...

1. How do you go to the store? I'm not talking the mall, I can use the double stroller for Cayden and the baby, and have Madison walk. But how do you go to places where you'll need a cart, like Target and the Grocery Store? Cayden isn't walking yet, but even when he does, I wouldn't trust him to walk through a store on his own at a year! And those big carts that have the spots in the back for the kids to sit I think would be still too big for him, he'd slide through the straps. I would normally put him in the front part of the cart, and have Maddie walk - but then where do I put the new little one? And if I put the new little one in the actual cart part, where do I put all the groceries? Am I doomed to not get out of the house and will have to resort to Peapod forever?

2. Cayden's new room. We have a nursery all set up already, so that is fine. Maddie has her own room. We will be moving Cayden out of the nursery into his new room. Do we buy a whole new crib? I'm thinking of using the pack n play and swing for the baby to give Cayden enough time to grow out of the crib. But then again, he could use it for another year or more still! He is a bit rambunctious already, so I dont' know if I'd want to trust him in a toddler bed just yet. Any thoughts?

3. Many of you said to get some help. We are thinking of hiring a college student for the summer. Not full time, just here and there. If you could have your ideal situation, how would you set up their hours? A few hours a day to run whatever errands came up, or would you have them come one day a week and you just left the house for that whole day? Would it be easier for you to have that college student run your errands for you instead?

4. Which of my two kids is going to have the hardest transition (Maddie or Cayden) and what can I do to make that smoother?

Any other tips or tricks or ANY advice at all will be helpful. I know many of you said routine is key...I'd love to hear some examples. Can you tell I'm gettting in to that freakout/nesting phase?


Thanks for all the help - I might have some more questions for ya too!!

I have "irish twins". They are 7 & 8 now, they are true "irish twins" they were both born in 1999. DS's b-day is Jan. 18 and DD's b-day is Dec. 29.

I will try to help the best I can.

1. When the two were little, my DH and I would go to the grocery store together. One of us would have the older baby in the front part of the buggy and the other would leave the little baby in their car seat and place it in the buggy.

2. We bought a new crib...actually we had a friend give it to us. You could also use a bassinet while the youngest is still little and by the time the baby is out of the bassinet, the older one moved into a toddler bed. But one thing is key, don't let the older child think that he is being moved out of his bed for the new baby.

3. Probably the best time will depend on your children. If they are really good morning babies, then you may want to do mornings. But if they are really good in the afternoon, then you may want to do afternoons.

4. I don't know the answer to this one. But I do know that the older baby didn't even really have an issue with the new baby. I guess because he was so young, that it didn't even phase him.

I'll add another thing...I know that it seems really scary right now, but my two are the best of friends. It is hard the first year or so, but once they start to be a little more independant, it is really great to watch them play together.

 

[Cool-Beans]

I had three little ones. At the grocery store, they went into one cart and the groceries went into another. But I tried like hell to shop when DH had them.

At the mall, two went into a stoller and one walked/got carried. But, again, I'd try to go without them or bring someone along to push a second stroller.

But sometimes you have to pick up the dry cleaning or a prescription or whatever. Try to go after naps and allow time.

In the car, I'd put them all in and let 2 wander around the car while I got one buckled. Then I'd rope the 2nd one into a seat, and finally the third. The baby was always up front with me, so this was easier than it sounds.

It is a major pain in the patootie, but it only lasts a short time. Of course, I was in my early 20s. I can't imagine doing it all again now, lol.

When kids are really little, there isn't much thought for jealousy. Mine were more like, what the heck is this thing? What happens if I throw a toy at it while it lays there in the crib? Soon enough they forgot there had been a time when it wasn't around.

Good luck, Mom!!!

 

[hpygrll]

My boys are 18 months apart - we bought a second crib. I didn't want to completely change the world of my older DS and he was in the crib for quite a while....

I tried to do the grocery store with DH...or let him watch the boys and I would go.

Good luck to you!!! It's so exciting. I thought the first year was not so bad because you are already in the baby mode!

Jenny

 

[mickeyboat]

I am the mother of Irish twin girls 9/2/99 and 8/27/00. The cut-off for K was 9/1/05, so they ended up in the same grade in school - another whole set of challenges.

Hannah was not anywhere ready to go into a toddler bed when Emily was born. She didn't leave her crib until she was 3, so we borrowed my SIL's crib for Emily, and bought a new set of crib bedding. Emily stayed in our room in a cradle and then a potra-crib for a while and then went into her own room at about 7 months.

Hannah was not walking when Emily was born. Actually, she was toddling a little holding on to fingers, which was not healthy for a 9 months pregnant mother's back, I'll tell you. I remember my first outing to the drugstore to pick up my birth control (VERY important trip) with both girls. I had to carry Hannah on one hip and Emily in her car seat. I was almost in tears by the time I got to the door and put Hannah into the cart. It was a very trying experience, and I vowed not to do it again. So after that all shopping was a family experience, and all four of us would go. We would take two carts and put one kid in each. Once I went back to work, I did a lot of shopping on my lunch hour, because taking both to the store, even with DH, was not a fun time for anyone.

I think a helper would be a great idea. I have a friend who had a girl, then a boy, and then twin boys, all within 5 years. She told her DH she needed either a nanny or a housekeeper/cook. She got a nanny. It lets her have some time to exercise, shop, run a kid or two to school, and spend some time alone with each kid. I think having some help would be great so that you can spend some one on one time with each kid, and to be able to get some work done around the house.

The transition for Hannah was pretty seamless. She doesn't ever remember a time when Emily was not around. That being said, I took primary responsibiltiy for Hannah - especially when it was time for bed, and DH took responsibility for Emily.

When the girls were small, it was REALLY hard. I remember standing beside Hannah's crib one night patting her back with my right hand while nursing Emily in my left. Nap times were not easy to coordinate. It wasn't easy to find day care for two infants, and most people thought we were crazy.

But now, I have to say, I would not have done it any other way. My girls are best friends, and are usually lost without one another. It is a lot easier to attend one gymnastics class and one T-ball game than two. They wear the same sized clothes, so they can share wardrobes. I am sure once they get older we will face lots of trials and tribulations, but for now, we love having Irish twins.

Good luck to you1 If you have any more questions I can help with, let me know.

Denae

 

[Poohgirl]

I have two sons 15 months apart. Ok, Im not going to lie to ya, the first couple years were tough! I really does take a lot of time management to just do simple things. I did have help from my mother and would have her watch one child when she could so I could run errands. I would do groceries and other errands after my husband got home and again, we would divide and conquer and I would take one. When you are going through it you work it out and somehow manage, but looking back, whew!

Best of luck!

 

[DisneyMommyMichelle]

my DD and DS are 11 months apart and it's pretty easy

1. How do you go to the store? I'm not talking the mall, I can use the double stroller for Cayden and the baby, and have Madison walk. But how do you go to places where you'll need a cart, like Target and the Grocery Store? Cayden isn't walking yet, but even when he does, I wouldn't trust him to walk through a store on his own at a year! And those big carts that have the spots in the back for the kids to sit I think would be still too big for him, he'd slide through the straps. I would normally put him in the front part of the cart, and have Maddie walk - but then where do I put the new little one? And if I put the new little one in the actual cart part, where do I put all the groceries? Am I doomed to not get out of the house and will have to resort to Peapod forever?

I agree with the baby carrier, HOWEVER i'm pregnant with #3 right now and if i wanted to leave the baby in the carrier and pop her/him into the cart, i would put both kids in the back. NOT alot of room for groceries, but i shop once a week and sometimes daily for fresher produce, so it works for us I also do ALOT ALOT of shopping at Sams club and they have carts that fit 2 kids int he front part (like a regular cart Not those seat type things) and then the carts are soo big there is still space for the carrier AND groceries in the back. FINALLY i get ALOT of our produce at WOODMANS (is there one by you?) they have FABULOUS carts that have a bench in the front (it like a park bench with seat belts) and then i put both kids there and can pop the carrier where it belongs in the wagon

2. Cayden's new room. We have a nursery all set up already, so that is fine. Maddie has her own room. We will be moving Cayden out of the nursery into his new room. Do we buy a whole new crib? I'm thinking of using the pack n play and swing for the baby to give Cayden enough time to grow out of the crib. But then again, he could use it for another year or more still! He is a bit rambunctious already, so I dont' know if I'd want to trust him in a toddler bed just yet. Any thoughts?

How about an inexpensive bassinet? i can't really help here as both my kids were out of their cribs at 12months so i had one all the time But i do have a bassinet in the masterbedroom in case the baby wants to be close Pack N plays are just not very practical for full time sleep Try craigslist.com

3. Many of you said to get some help. We are thinking of hiring a college student for the summer. Not full time, just here and there. If you could have your ideal situation, how would you set up their hours? A few hours a day to run whatever errands came up, or would you have them come one day a week and you just left the house for that whole day? Would it be easier for you to have that college student run your errands for you instead?

I am not in need of any help, but if and when i do need some, i just wait until DH gets home and one of us can always stay with the kids if anything i would want a night nurse so i can sleep! hahaha!

4. Which of my two kids is going to have the hardest transition (Maddie or Cayden) and what can I do to make that smoother?

Your baby will have the roughest transition! that's how it was when number 2 came and i already see my little guy becomeing waaaay more attatched to me.

Good luck and you will be fine!! i was terrified when i first foundout i was pregnant! now i'm ready for anything!!!

 

[mookie]

my DD and DS are 11 months apart and it's pretty easy




I agree with the baby carrier, HOWEVER i'm pregnant with #3 right now and if i wanted to leave the baby in the carrier and pop her/him into the cart, i would put both kids in the back. NOT alot of room for groceries, but i shop once a week and sometimes daily for fresher produce, so it works for us I also do ALOT ALOT of shopping at Sams club and they have carts that fit 2 kids int he front part (like a regular cart Not those seat type things) and then the carts are soo big there is still space for the carrier AND groceries in the back. FINALLY i get ALOT of our produce at WOODMANS (is there one by you?) they have FABULOUS carts that have a bench in the front (it like a park bench with seat belts) and then i put both kids there and can pop the carrier where it belongs in the wagon



How about an inexpensive bassinet? i can't really help here as both my kids were out of their cribs at 12months so i had one all the time But i do have a bassinet in the masterbedroom in case the baby wants to be close Pack N plays are just not very practical for full time sleep Try craigslist.com



I am not in need of any help, but if and when i do need some, i just wait until DH gets home and one of us can always stay with the kids if anything i would want a night nurse so i can sleep! hahaha!



Your baby will have the roughest transition! that's how it was when number 2 came and i already see my little guy becomeing waaaay more attatched to me.

Good luck and you will be fine!! i was terrified when i first foundout i was pregnant! now i'm ready for anything!!!

Michelle, we just may need to go out after #3 is born for both of us so I can keep picking your brain. I'll buy the wine.

Woodmans has those cool carts huh??? There is one over in Carpentersville, not a far drive at all. I'll have to check it out.....

 

[mookie]

Hannah was not walking when Emily was born. Actually, she was toddling a little holding on to fingers, which was not healthy for a 9 months pregnant mother's back, I'll tell you. I remember my first outing to the drugstore to pick up my birth control (VERY important trip) with both girls. I had to carry Hannah on one hip and Emily in her car seat. I was almost in tears by the time I got to the door and put Hannah into the cart. It was a very trying experience, and I vowed not to do it again. So after that all shopping was a family experience, and all four of us would go. We would take two carts and put one kid in each. Once I went back to work, I did a lot of shopping on my lunch hour, because taking both to the store, even with DH, was not a fun time for anyone.

When the girls were small, it was REALLY hard. I remember standing beside Hannah's crib one night patting her back with my right hand while nursing Emily in my left. Nap times were not easy to coordinate. It wasn't easy to find day care for two infants, and most people thought we were crazy.

But now, I have to say, I would not have done it any other way. My girls are best friends, and are usually lost without one another. It is a lot easier to attend one gymnastics class and one T-ball game than two. They wear the same sized clothes, so they can share wardrobes. I am sure once they get older we will face lots of trials and tribulations, but for now, we love having Irish twins.

Good luck to you1 If you have any more questions I can help with, let me know.

Denae

Danae, these are the scenerios I'm worried about! That first trip, and the realization that things are not going to be easy for a while. I am such a control freak with doing things, I think I'll have to let go of that for a few years. You are a saint for shopping with your DH - every time I go shopping with him, we end up spending double what I had planned, and it's all junk. But, again, I guess it's worth my sanity!

I know it will be easier down the road. It's just the road to getting there I'm worried about!



Thanks so much for the advice.

 

[mookie]

You are a saint for shopping with your DH - every time I go shopping with him, we end up spending double what I had planned, and it's all junk.

I just reread my own post - I made it sound like I was shopping with Mickeyboat's DH!

You all know what I mean!

 

[mickeyboat]

I just reread my own post - I made it sound like I was shopping with Mickeyboat's DH!

You all know what I mean!

I was wondering why he was going to Chicago all the time. Next time, please wash his clothes before you send him home!

 

[Sherri]

My kids are 1 year and two weeks apart. My son wasn't walking until 14 months, when my mom left after helping us out for a week I didn't know how I was going to do it. But I was fine.
It was very easy, infact it was the best adventure ever. Now they are 14 1/2 and 15 1/2, I would do anything to have them little again.
I had a double stroller (I suggest front to back and not side to side because of the manuvering).
We spent lots of time going out and I neve remember it being a struggle. You will find a system that works also. Good luck.
I am very happy my kids are close in age.

 

[DisneyMommyMichelle]

Michelle, we just may need to go out after #3 is born for both of us so I can keep picking your brain. I'll buy the wine.

Woodmans has those cool carts huh??? There is one over in Carpentersville, not a far drive at all. I'll have to check it out.....

haha sounds like a good deal! i could use a drink!

Yup Woodmans has awesome carts and they are huuge!

It's totally worth the drive! they have the freshest produce around and great prices!!

 

[tink621]

Our two youngest are 12mo. 5 days apart. I agree with what the others said. It's hard for awhile but then you just adjust. I always tried to go shopping when my DH was home and he could watch the babies. I did borrow a second crib. We used the pack n play in our room for 4 mo. but then it was time to move him to a crib and our one year old was still too young at 16mo. to move to a toddler bed. Our one year old never seemed to be jealous. I guess he was just too young to realize what was happening. I remember the worst part was trying to juggle ped. visits. Because they were usually always when my DH was at work. So i had to juggle both by myself. Which was really fun when one was sick. Now they are 2 1/2 and 3 1/2 and they are the best of friends. It's still hard to go out with both because they are so busssy!! We are taking them to Disney the end of May for the first time. Yes I've already purchased harness's which I have never used before. But I'm being realistic!! They'll only stay in the strollers for so long. Good luck with everything. It'll all work out just fine. I now miss mine being small babies.

 

[1Prince2Princesses]

Congrats on your upcoming delivery! I bet you're SO ready.

My youngest two are 15 months apart. Here's my advice:

1. On the subject of shopping - Use this as an excuse to leave the house with NO children. If you must take all 3, use a baby sling. By the time the little one outgrows it, you can use the cart with the double seats.

2. On the subject of beds - Don't buy another crib. If you really worry about Cayden getting up too much, buy a used one. He'll be ready for a bed before you know it. You might actually be shocked at how well he does in one now. My son went to a toddler bed on his 1st birthday, and it only took about a week of consistently sending him back to bed once or twice before he was good with it.

3. On the subject of help - By all means, take it. And do the errands yourself. You'll appreciate being able to run to the bank or a store without hauling 3 kids in and out of carseats. Treat yourself to coffee in a bookstore or something while you're out. As far as what times to schedule your help, see what works best. If you need one day to do a lot of errands, then try that. If you have something you could do a few hours a day, like gardening or a class, then take the help daily.

4. On the subject of transition - I would imagine Cayden will have a harder time with it than Maddie, but who knows. It's hard to predict how kids will react to big changes. The best thing you can do is make a concentrated effort to spend at least a few minutes of each day with each of your kids individually.

Good luck with your new baby.

 

[Blondie]

My kids are about 18 months apart. I'm not going to lie to you. The first year with such small children is hard.

It's the truth.

My boys are 11 months and 10 days apart, both born in 1990 (January and December.)

I did a lot of crying those first 18 months. We lived away from family and friends and had nobody to rely on but oursevles.

Most of the time I waited for my DH to get home from work before I'd go shopping. It just wasn't worth the hassle of bringing two babies out at the same time. There were times when I'd have to take them out by myself, but I didn't prefer it that way, I'll tell you that much.

We had two cribs, two car seats (ofcourse), two highchairs and two baby swings. There really wasn't any other way to do it. Oh yeah, and two in diapers!

My first son had no problem adjusting to the second. It was a seamless transition.

I couldn't get both of them to take naps at the same time. I'd get one down and the other one would wake up. I was a walking zombie for quite some time!

My first was an early walker so at least one was walking before the second one came along.

I'm soooo glad those days are behind me now! I wouldn't revisit them for all the money in the world!

I do miss when they were 2 and 3 years old though. They were each other's best friends and so cute. Now they can't stand each other at ages 16 and 17!

Good luck!