Buying Gifts for Spoiled Kids

[4formickey]

give nanny 911 a call!

 

[Karel]

And since when did gift cards become gifts? It's the equivalent of the unpersonalized wad of cash...nice to have, but a gift should be thought out,and given as a kindness,not b/c one is forced to "buy something" for someone whos' too pampered to care anyway? Why not just have the "spoiled one" open a bank account,and have the relatives send in their deposits,it would be simpler!

Honestly, that is what teens want - they want to shop and pick out what they want. Teens don't really care about a personal gift that is well thought out. THEY want to do the thinking and get something when the mood strikes them.

For me, picking out a gift is finding something the person would really enjoy.

And let's face it, teenagers just don't get excited. They are not six, jumping up and down, throwing their arms around you.

Yes, a thank you is necessary but don't expect much enthusiasm, cause it's just not going to happen.

Ask your nephews what THEY want and really listen. Nothing drives me nuttier than when my mother and sister blow off my kids' lists because they don't think their wants are interesting enough. My sister always refused to buy Barbie things for my daughter.

 

[Nik's Mom]

O.k, the nephews from the first posts sound like ungreatful brats. Here's what I would do. I received a packet of cards to an abused women and children shelter that I donated to every month. The packet included christmas cards where I could write the name of someone, plus include the amount that I would want to donate in their honor.

The card would read something like "Aunt X and Uncle Y donated $$ in your honor to Haven House. Merry Christmas.
To the op, if you really want your hard earned money to do some good, plus give the kids a very important lesson in life, maybe you could try something like that.

Too often, we ALL forget how truely fortunate we are.

Edited to add that I bought my spoiled nephew movie tickets. He will enjoy that a lot more than clothes that I'm sure would be not up to his standards. Have you thought of movie tickets.

 

[fabshelly]

I'm one of those kids whose parents never taught them about thank you notes.
I didn't know about them, other than receiving them on occasion, til just a few years ago. Amazingly ignorant for someone who considers herself reasonably well-read, don't you think?

Here's a thought: ask them.
Call sis, ask if you can talk to the kids, and say: "I only have a small budget this year, about 20.00, and don't want to blow it on something you don't want. What would you like for Christmas this year?"

 

[EthansMom]

I don't know that I would make a donation to a charity in their name... I don't think they would "get" it.

Personally, I would drastically reduce how much I spend on these kids as it just seems to be going down the drain... maybe $20 or $30 per kid is reasonable, especially if they are old enough that they could work. I would either get a gift card that they would use (Ambercrombie, Itunes, etc.) or give them cash. Yes, it's not a personal gift, but it's one that you know will get used.

Don't expect any more of a response from the kids than before. But at least you'll only be out $40-$50 AND the gift will get used.

 

[*love*2*shop]

personally, if they dont say thankyou and could care less, i would *NOT*be spending 150.00 on them..umm,like 20.00 would be my max...I have 2 nephews like this..When i asked the parents ( my husbands brother lol) they told me i could buy the boys each an xbox game or something...UMM< i Looked they are 65.00 each ..wrong!!! for those 2 UNGRRRRRAATEFUL children!! So i grabbed them each a 20.00 Gift card..they STILL WONT appreciate it..BUT atleats i only spent $40.00 Instead of $120!! or more..... and no, we dont get a hug, thank you or anything either..Ive given up, you cant fret on it!

 

[LuluLovesDisney]

Wow! There are tons of ideas and opinions on here. I am thinking about it. I really like the idea of giving something that would require spending time with them. Maybe a trip to New York City or something (we're less than 1/2 hr. away) that maybe we could combine with a volunteer thing of some kind. I will have to think on this. I do love them. I don't really expect them to jump up and down, but I definitely needed to do something. I know I'm not their parents, but I don't just want to get them another gadget or game and contribute to the "madness" as one poster put it, too. As for ages- they are 12 and 13. I also have three other nephews, one other niece and my boyfriend has a goddaughter that we have to shop for. They are all easier to shop for though.

 

[Sammie]

Every gift given should recieve a thank you. However and this is from personal experience, that sometimes the Thank You from a teen is never enthusiastic enough for adults. I mean you do have to consider their ages. They should never be rude, but getting them to even say Thank You at that age is an accomplishment.

Also in our family situation, many gifts given to us were more about what the giver liked and less about what the person receiving it liked. It truly is not about the amount spent it was more about the fact the Aunt or Uncle or other relative did not even know us well enough to know we would have liked and they never seemed to even try. They bought want they wanted to buy and then expected to us to "love" it. Sometimes that is pretty hard to fake.

I agree with the ideas to do something they would enjoy, just be sure you ask them. Again its not going to be much fun if you are the only one wanting do this. Or a music or movie card are good ideas too.

Good luck, buying gifts can be very difficult at times.

 

[teacherforhi]

I'm a difficult person to buy for. I always have been. Gift cards are very much appreciated. My family knows that I cross stitch and usually end up giving me gift cards to craft shops.

I agree with the poster who said that you shouldn't be buying presents based on what YOU think they should like. Just because you're a teacher (I am too) doesn't mean that you only have to give educational gifts. Even if the person you're buying for likes to read, perhaps the book you pick out isn't something that interests him or her. You may get a thank you, but certainly not an enthusiastic one. After all, it's more a gift for you, than for them.

 

[torinsmom]

I think the idea of a day out with you is a good one. You could take them somewhere that they have wanted to go and not been able to. Maybe the gift could be telling them about the day with you in NY and you could also spend some time with them after, researching online for what might be fun to do there.That way, they get to play a part in what they get.

Marsha

 

[punkin]

I didn't realize you have NY as a backdrop. Give them a day with you in the City as a present. Take them to the City. Take them to ice scate at Rockefeller Center. Take them window browsing at Sacks. Take them out to lunch and call it a day. It will be lovely.

If you can afford more money, take them to a broadway show. Beauty and the Beast is always half off. Slava's snow show is also cheap and a hit with kids. Even standing in line at the TKTS booth (remember they changed locations temporarily) waiting t to get show tickets can be fun and exciting if you use the time to actually talk to them as people and not spoiled brats.

 

[lovebuzz]

every year my mom gets us some kind of puzzle toy ( I'm 36 )one year we had to figure it out to get a wine bottle etc.... well last year she bought a puzzle that you put money into. It is called Bilz Obstacle. it took ua about 30 minutes to figure out how to get our money out and we had fun racing each other to see who could figure it out the fastest. It only cost about $12 per game but, it is well worth it. In fact that is what my nieces and nephews will be doing this christmas.

 

[lovebuzz]

every year my mom gets us some kind of puzzle toy ( I'm 36 )one year we had to figure it out to get a wine bottle etc.... well last year she bought a puzzle that you put money into. It is called Bilz Obstacle. it took us about 30 minutes to figure out how to get our money out and we had fun racing each other to see who could figure it out the fastest. It only cost about $12 per game but, it is well worth it. In fact that is what my nieces and nephews will be doing this christmas.

 

[lovebuzz]

every year my mom gets us some kind of puzzle toy ( I'm 36 )one year we had to figure it out to get a wine bottle etc.... well last year she bought a puzzle that you put money into. It is called Bilz Obstacle. it took us about 30 minutes to figure out how to get our money out and we had fun racing each other to see who could figure it out the fastest. It only cost about $12 per game but, it is well worth it. In fact that is what my nieces and nephews will be doing this christmas.

 

[roseprincess]

Okay, I know that's a little harsh, but I hate buying gifts for my nephews. Two of them really have everything they could ever want. They spend about $100 a weekend easily. They go out to eat three or four times a week. They each have four ipods, including the brand new ones that just came out a few months ago. Neither does particularly well in school, or has any real interests outside of girls, sports, video games and electronics. I really got my feelings hurt last year when I picked out candy, specifically, well-thought-out books (I'm a teacher) for each and a $50 gift card and they peeled it all open and tossed it to the side with a dry "thanks". I work several jobs and had to go through a lot to earn that $150 for their gifts.

Does anyone else on a budget have to buy for a well-to-do family member and do you have any advice for me? I do love them and I really would like to watch them have a little excitement. Now, Christmas is really nothing special to them, because they get anything they want all year long and other than decorations, there's really no difference to them. I'd just like to buy something that they really enjoy, but maybe something *different*/more educational/less materialistic than the expensive trendy gifts they get every weekend. Is "nonmaterialistic gift" an anachronism or what!

Any ideas are appreciated!!

I don't know if you go to church, but you could invite your nephews to a church, to the jr. high ministry service. I go to a megachurch in the Chicago area, so we have tons of kids that go to children's church on a weekly basis, jr high services and high school services (all for their age groups).You could invite your nephews to a jr high age church service. And also do an Adopt-A- Family thing for a family that is less fortunate than them. You and the nephews can buy items, clothes, toys- for a less fortunate family. Maybe use some of that money the nephews were going to use for themselves for a less fortunate family for the Adopt-A- Family giving
I think this would be a great experience for them, then this will "open their eyes" to kids much less fortunate than them!

Also, the giving money towards a charity would be a great idea, too! They can give towards the Make-A-Wish foundation or another children's charity
Hopefully the parents of the nephews will understand you don't want to do a monetary gift for them this yr. But a different kind of gift

Keep us posted what your are planning on doing.

 

[pjhootch]

If you're that close to the city it should be easy. Skating at Rockefeller is a cool idea, but it will cost you a fortune before you even have lunch! Try the Wollman rink in central park. It gets crowded, but it is cheaper and larger.

I hate the chain/touristy places, but boys that age would probably love the Hard Rock cafe. Not cheap either, but what is? There are also some really obvious free type things to do like the museums (have to remember to make a "donation" instead of paying the full price) or BAM. If they are pretty blase kids they might not get into the musuem thing... but maybe Natural History would work. They might have been there with a school trip if they live that close. The planetarium usually is very cool for kids that age, but it will put you right back up at $150.00 pretty quickly.

 

[luv2nascar]

I would either give them savings bonds (who cares if they don't like them its for future use anyways) or night on the town with you. Movies and dinner would be cheaper than what you're spending.

 

[summerrluvv]

every year my mom gets us some kind of puzzle toy ( I'm 36 )one year we had to figure it out to get a wine bottle etc.... well last year she bought a puzzle that you put money into. It is called Bilz Obstacle. it took us about 30 minutes to figure out how to get our money out and we had fun racing each other to see who could figure it out the fastest. It only cost about $12 per game but, it is well worth it. In fact that is what my nieces and nephews will be doing this christmas.

They sell these on QVC. They look pretty neat!

 

[nettii]

I would continue to get some thing for them it sounds like they are old enough to understand you dont make as much as their family.

I would get some thing like passes to an indoor ice rink, laser tag, roller skating or even the movies. Good luck

P.S. I can relate my nephews 5 and three own more cell phones, i-pods and gadgets than I will ever have or want, But I love them and I try to give from my heart!

 

[Earstou]

My nephews are younger, and every toy has to be electronic and expensive. This year DH and I decided to get them each one Nintendo game they asked for, but we also are going to give them tools, nails and a bunch of scrap wood. Dh will take them out to the garage and show them how to use a hammer, saw, square, ect. I'm really excited about giving them gifts now that we've come up with this idea!