buy in, contract, agreement for kids...

[GritsGirl]

Okay, I am not sure what to call this thing, but I am working on an agreement or a contract for the kids to "buy into" as far as what our expectations are on them on the cruise. I basically copied all of the suggestions (except one) from an old thread here on the DIS. My husband and I will be taking six kids, ages 13 (one of the kids is developmentally more like a 10 or 11 year old) to 18 on the Wonder in June.

Here is what I have so far....I think I am open to any suggestions...are things in the wrong order? What am I missing? Am I too tough?....I want to be THE QUEEN, but not the Evil Queen all the time. Thanks in advance for your inputs....Grits Girl

Dear Nieces and Nephews,

We love you VERY much and can’t wait to go on the Disney Cruise with you. Please read the agreement below and think about whether or not you are willing to do your best to abide by the terms outlined. If you agree, please sign by your name at the bottom.

I. Dining
a. I will have respect for my fellow dining companions and the wait staff and arrive on time for dinner.
b. I will thank my servers daily to let them know that I appreciate their service.
c. I will arrive at dinner appropriately dressed.
d. I will use good manners at the table. I may not try everything on the menu, but I will not ridicule the choices made by others at the table. I will remain polite even if I do not care for my dish.
e. I will always treat ALL wait staff with kindness and never bark orders as if they were my personal slaves.


II. Stateroom
a. I will pick up after myself in my stateroom. My steward is there to make sure that my room is clean........NOT BE MY SERVANT!!!
b. I will thank my room steward daily to let them know that I appreciate their service.
c. I will not expect my room steward to be at my beckon call 24 hours per day
d. If I sleep until noon, I will accept that my bed may not get made until evening when my chocolates magically appear.


III. Elevators
a. Sometimes I will take the stairs so those who need the elevator can use it.
b. I will let people OFF the elevator before entering
c. I will respect the people already waiting for the elevator and not rush on the elevator ahead of them, (even if I am going to be late for a show and I am only going up one deck and the person I barge ahead of has been summoned to pick up his/her child, and this person has a bad knee and cannot walk up 6 decks).


IV. Corridors
a. I will not tie up elevators and stairwells.
b. I will not knock on doors and run.
c. I will remember not to run or shout in the hallways. If other members of my family forget, I will remind them kindly. Remember that they are narrow and not everyone is out of their staterooms and on your same schedule.


V. Theaters
a. I will not save more than one seat at the theater. If others in my party need a seat, they will have to represent themselves.
b. I will not be obnoxious during movies and shows and prevent others from enjoying the offerings.
c. I will not videotape the shows. When taping is allowed I will not hold my arm straight up in the air and leave that display screen on.


VI. General
a. I will show up for the muster drill on time. Two thousand people don't appreciate standing in the hot sun waiting for me to stroll along 20 mins late. The chants of “walk the plank” will not be pretty.
b. I will offer to take a picture for someone with their camera so their entire family can be in the picture.
c. I will ALWAYS set aside enough money for tipping the hardworking staff who help make my cruise experience a wonderful one!
d. I will be sure to mention by name on the guest comment card those crew members who made the trip extra magical.
e. I will remember that there are also 2400 OTHER people on board, and they would all like a chair, seat, or Hammock Too!
f. I will not make prank calls to other staterooms--------these are traceable and it gets UGLY (plus it is tacky and rude).
g. I will return to the ship at the time set by Captain Mickey.
h. I will follow the ship’s rules even if others live as if they are above those rules.
i. I will treat others as I would like to be treated
j. I will remember to be grateful that I get to go on this wonderful vacation and if everything doesn't go just perfectly at least I am on Mickey’s ship.
k. Cruising is a privilege and I will remember that 92% of Americans NEVER get the chance to cruise and millions of people would be happy to trade with me.
l. I will understand that the island locals are just trying to make a living [Would you like some braids, pretty lady?] and politely say 'no thank you'. And even though I will probably have to repeat those two words many times during the day - I will not get angry or short tempered with them.
m. I will NOT throw ANYTHING (including siblings) off of the ship…Even if I think no one can see me.


VII. Pool
a. I will not save extra seats at the pool.
b. I will let someone looking for a chair know if I plan to depart the pool area for a while to eat, nap, go to a show, (etc.) so that they can occupy the chair I am leaving.
c. I will be properly clothed and not act like it is a naked bunny beach.


VIII. MOST IMPORTANTLY
a. I WILL HAVE A GREAT TRIP!!
b. I WILL NOT SWEAT THE SMALL STUFF!!
c. I will ALWAYS say please and thank you.

 

[sillysmom]

If I ever work on a cruise ship, I hope you visit while I am there. Wonderful rules, I'm going to print them out for my 9 year old. I personally would include, letting you know where they will be at all times, or at least to be prompt when meeting up with each other.

 

[MinnesotaMouseketeers]

This should be included with the documents that Disney sends for each person to sign (at least read), kids and ADULTS. I ran into a few disrespectful adults as well on our cruises. Well done.

 

[chucklechops]

Brilliant, infact I think this should apply to some of those not so friendly adults that I have heard occasionaly frequent the disney ships, I take my hat off to you and wish you a very happy cruise.
Chucklechops

 

[dis4me]

 

[dis4me]

I love it. I would however add that they should be appreciative to the wonderful relatives that are taking them on this cruise.'
But most importantly I promise to agree to all your terms and conditions if only for one week I can be your neice and come along.It sounds like you will have a great trip.

 

[chucklechops]

Hi I think your idea is brilliant, infact I think it should apply to the unfriendly and dare I say rude adult that occasionaly frquent the disney ships.
I take my hat of to you you have done it brilliantly, even including a bit of humour which always works well.
Have a happy cruise
Chucklechops

 

[Dreamer04]

GritsGirl, I love this! I copied it for my kids!

I would add, especially for the kids who can sign themselves out of the club and older teens, that everyone will stay in touch-via an agreed method-when changing locations.

 

[mickey minder]

That is just wonderful. I wish all children on board (and a lot of adults also) agreed to your terms. I would add a statement about respecting other cultures. Not only does the crew come from all over the world, but you will be visiting ports of call that may be in other countries. Great job.

 

[luvsTink]

copies and pasted! I will be adapting if some for the younger ones, but it has great things to go over with them.. I am guessing there are a few adults who should go over these

 

[Doctor P]

Wonderful!

 

[Sammy]

.......(snip).......c. I will be properly clothed and not act like it is a naked bunny beach.

This is great! After seeing what some of the local teens wear at the beach in our area (or don't wear...as the case may be), this is a good one!

I'm also going to print this out for our upcoming February cruise. I think everything you wrote could be applied to both the teens AND adults traveling!

Thanks,
Sammy

 

[faireygod mother]

I hope I do not get flamed for this, but I disagree with item 1 d " I will use good manners at the table. I may not try everything on the menu, but I will not ridicule the choices made by others at the table. I will remain polite even if I do not care for my dish.

This cruise is, for most, a chance of a life time. They would not otherwise get to experince some of the cuisene served on the ship. IMHO they should be allowed to try one new thing per meal. We did this last month with our DGD. Some things she liked and some she did not. Because she was 8, I ordered something new and she tried it. We encouraged our children and neice to do the same. It enhanced their overall cruise experience. They left the cruise with a greater appreciation for finer food, fast food is not a staple, and still discuss some of their choices. My DGD turned her nose up at a cold soup, until she tried it and then ordered it for the next meal.

Most people do not go to fine resturaunts and order something new that they are unsure if they will like. This is a chance to broaden their exposure. Please consider it as well.

Now from a family therapist who has worked extensively with adolescents involved in the court system. WOW, this is awesome. I have many parents that could benefit from your caring to take the time and set clear limits and boundaries for them. It will only enhance their vacation because they will not have to think, they will know what is expected and what the consequence will be if they do not follow through.

May you have a wonderful cruise.

 

[UGAFan0829]

Wow, those are really good. It's nice to know that there are parents (or in your case aunts/uncles) who still care about their children's manners!

 

[JJsmama]

Ok, I will add the dissenting opinion. I think the list is a good idea, but I also think it is a little over the top. Speaking as a parent and former high school teacher, the length of the list would overwhelm most teens and children and lead to frustration. Secondly, it sounds as if you are expecting the kids to misbehave in all these ways. The impression that you already think they bad kids could be very hurtful to them.

I think a better contract for kids might be:

I understand that this cruise is a privledge and I will use my best manners at all times.

I will be respectful and courteous in the dining rooms.

I will be be respectful and courteous of all the other passengers and crew.

I will be on my best behavior and not do things I know I shouldn't.

I will pick up after myself in the stateroom.

 

[KaitlinsMom]

I think it is great - It is missing one thing -

What will the consequence be for breaking a rule? Now most of the "rules" probably will not have a consequence, but some of them should (prank calls, knocking on doors, etc) - They lose some of their spending money? Can't have dessert at dinner? just a thought -

I do agree with the above poster - If you can, maybe slim down the rules a little - They might be overwhelmed when they see how much - Some of what you have listed crossover (like thanking the staff, telling them, etc)

Great idea! I have bookmarked this page!

Karen

PS - Just want to wish you luck traveling with 6 TEENAGERS!!!! You are more
courageous than I!

 

[kikipug]

I think a better contract for kids might be:

I understand that this cruise is a privledge and I will use my best manners at all times.

I will be respectful and courteous in the dining rooms.

I will be be respectful and courteous of all the other passengers and crew.

I will be on my best behavior and not do things I know I shouldn't.

I will pick up after myself in the stateroom.

This is a great condensed version for kids who don't have the attention span to read all the details. I would add, "I will not do anything to make Mom or Dad raise their voice in public.".... that would cover just about anything else. I would also add to the verbage of "other passengers and crew" to include SIBLINGS specifically. My kids WILL be seeing this contract in the future!

 

[my3kids]

I LOVE it!! It will be printed for my kids to sign before our next cruise in August.

 

[scrapperjill]

Over all I think it's a great contract...but I have to agree with faireygod mother on item 1D....being on the cruise and having the options at dinner they should be encouraged to branch out and try new things. We did this with our whole family...and found may things that we would have NEVER tryed otherwise. The staff/servers often encourage you to order more than one item...and they make wonderful suggestions (sometimes). Of course you have to order everything at one time...In that they shouldn't be limited to ordering just one item.

 

[april riddle]

I think your list is great for an adult - but I tend to agree that for a kid it might be a little overwhelming. Obviously you intend on living by these rules so hopefully the kids will learn from example. I hope you have a great trip and good luck with all those kids! Is it just you and your DH taking them? wow I admire you.!