BUSH ASKS RAELIANS TO CLONE TONY BLAIR
White House Building Coalition in Top-Secret Lab
In a rare appearance on NBCs Meet the Press on Sunday, Vice President Dick Cheney disclosed that the White House has enlisted Clonaid, the cloning concern run by the controversial Raelians cult, to create as many as a dozen clones of British Prime Minister Tony Blair.
The Vice President revealed that the decision to approach Clonaid was made during a late-night brainstorming session at the White House in which the President reportedly said, I wish we had nine Tony Blairs.
Picking up on the Presidents off-handed remark, National Security Advisor Condoleezza Rice replied, Mr. President, we have the technology.
Mr. Cheney said the White House opted to clone Mr. Blair after they realized they had only two real choices in the current diplomatic standoff over Iraq: Either get more allies to agree with us, or clone the one ally who does.
Although the Vice-President refused to be specific about where the new Tony Blairs were being cloned, sources close to the procedure say that the dozen or so Blair clones are currently gestating in a top-secret lab near the Presidents ranch in Crawford, Texas.
While hawks within the administration applauded the news that Mr. Blair was being replicated by the Raelians, one White House source worried that creating coalition partners in a test tube could set a dangerous precedent.
I dont think any of us wants to live in a world where there are a dozen Jacques Chiracs, the source said.
****BOROWITZ REPORT******
White House Building Coalition in Top-Secret Lab
In a rare appearance on NBCs Meet the Press on Sunday, Vice President Dick Cheney disclosed that the White House has enlisted Clonaid, the cloning concern run by the controversial Raelians cult, to create as many as a dozen clones of British Prime Minister Tony Blair.
The Vice President revealed that the decision to approach Clonaid was made during a late-night brainstorming session at the White House in which the President reportedly said, I wish we had nine Tony Blairs.
Picking up on the Presidents off-handed remark, National Security Advisor Condoleezza Rice replied, Mr. President, we have the technology.
Mr. Cheney said the White House opted to clone Mr. Blair after they realized they had only two real choices in the current diplomatic standoff over Iraq: Either get more allies to agree with us, or clone the one ally who does.
Although the Vice-President refused to be specific about where the new Tony Blairs were being cloned, sources close to the procedure say that the dozen or so Blair clones are currently gestating in a top-secret lab near the Presidents ranch in Crawford, Texas.
While hawks within the administration applauded the news that Mr. Blair was being replicated by the Raelians, one White House source worried that creating coalition partners in a test tube could set a dangerous precedent.
I dont think any of us wants to live in a world where there are a dozen Jacques Chiracs, the source said.
****BOROWITZ REPORT******
