Bucket List for Mom w/Stage 4 Cancer-UPDATE #267

[acomasdiaz]

Please know that my thoughts and prayers are with you and your family. Your mom is definitely a fighter. My she continue to be blessed with many more prayers.

I also must let you know that I wouldn't wait to take this trip. You really never know what the future holds and how much time you really have with her.

My father is very ill and has been for many years. About 12 years ago, we were told that he would probably only have a year to live. He lived the past 11 1/2 years in pretty good health. It got to the point that we didn't really think much about the diagnosis from years ago. Then about 6 months ago, he just started to go down hilll. When I say it was quick, I mean in mid Aug. he attended my son's b.day party and was fine. About 3 weeks later, my mom told us to cut our Disney trip short and come home early because my dad was really bad. In just a couple of shorts weeks, he was in a wheel chair and could barely get out of bed every day. He's still with us but we now take things on a day to day basis because we don't know how much time he has with us. We know not to expect much because God did give us 12 more years than we ever expected.

Best of luck!

 

[mrudman]

My prayers are with you and all your family!!

Being an oncology/hospice nurse, I will have to say time is definitely of the essence here. I honestly would not wait until June if this is one of your mom's final wishes that she go whale watching.

I would do everything (within reason financially) to make sure this trip happens as soon as possible.

As much as I would LOVE to see your mom pull through this, and get the treatment and conquer this cancer, usually once it hits the liver, it can really progress quickly and her health may go downhill extremely fast from here on out.

Just thinking of some of the patients that I've cared for on our floor, we've seen some people come in totally fine, get diagnosed with stage 4 (with liver involvment), and be on hospice within the week, and gone the following week.

Since your mom is feeling so wonderfully right now, now would definitely be the time to take advantage of that and get that trip done. Not sure of her treatment schedule, but at this stage of the game, I'd discuss the trip with her oncologist, get him on board, and go on this trip feeling as healthy as possible. If it means re-arranging the chemo/treatment schedule for a couple weeks so she can thoroughly enjoy her time, so be it.

I know the financial factor here is huge, so what about having just immediate family go on this trip (you, brothers, mom&dad), and then depending on how she feels, what her outcome is, in June have a trip (much smaller scale) with the entire family? Possible to DW like you had mentioned using the GAD tickets?

This way, it's ensured that your mom will get her dream trip, and you won't have any regrets by waiting if things don't turn out as hoped.

Best of luck with whatever you decide, and prayers are with you all!!

 

[dfchelbay]

I'm sorry to sound morbid, but can your family wait until this summer. When our son was diagnosed, he was stage 4. From diagnosis until his passing, it was only ten days. I hope and pray that your mum has a lot of time. Is there any whale watching now, or soon that she can take part in? Prayers to you and your family.

 

[ontariomonkey]

When do the California gray whales pass San Diego on their annual migration from Alaska to the Lagoons of Baja California?

Whale watching season traditionally takes place from mid-December to mid-March. Over 15,000 of these peaceful "giants of the sea" make the trek from the chilly Alaskan seas to the warm water breeding lagoons of Baja California. During mid-January, as many as 200 whales have been counted off the San Diego coast. Several companies offer whale watching tours and excursions for up close viewing of the whales. Cabrillo National Monument on Point Loma and the Birch Aquarium in La Jolla also offer viewing areas.

Here's a company that sounds nice, it's $85 per person, not sure for how long but it includes drinks, binoculars and other extras:

http://www.sailsandiego.com/main.html


Here's another company that is $85/adult $75/child for a 3 hour tour:

http://www.adventureribrides.com/

They report:We are now seeing:
Gray Whales Daily
Finback Whales
Bottlenose Dolphin
Pacific White-sided Dolphin
Long Beak Common Dolphin

Not sure how often they update their website of course.

 

[Tiana]

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[WDmommyof4]

First of all I would like to say that I am so sorry for you and your family and hope that you are able to make the most of this precious time together.

If you are at all interested in a trip to California, you could really do a budget trip while still giving her what she dreams of.

This company does 2 1/2-3 hour whale watching tours for $35 a person http://www.montereywhalewatching.com/ and this hotel on Expedia is $59 per night and looks really beautiful. It is located close to the Fisherman's Wharf where the touring place is located as well.

There are other things that she may also be interested nearby as well, such as the Monterey Bay Aquarium and the Maritime Museum.

If you decide to go a route like this, I know of an organization that may be able to contact some of the local places and get them to donate tickets and such for you trip. No promises, but they may be able to help slightly.

 

[monkey30]

First of all I would like to say that I am so sorry for you and your family and hope that you are able to make the most of this precious time together.

If you are at all interested in a trip to California, you could really do a budget trip while still giving her what she dreams of.

This company does 2 1/2-3 hour whale watching tours for $35 a person http://www.montereywhalewatching.com/ and this hotel on Expedia is $59 per night and looks really beautiful. It is located close to the Fisherman's Wharf where the touring place is located as well.

There are other things that she may also be interested nearby as well, such as the Monterey Bay Aquarium and the Maritime Museum.

If you decide to go a route like this, I know of an organization that may be able to contact some of the local places and get them to donate tickets and such for you trip. No promises, but they may be able to help slightly.

It is great to know people like u really do exisit! It is great to hear there are organizations that can help, there are so many out there that don't.

I hope your mom is able to take the trip! I wish u all the best in whatever u decide to do.

 

[poohfriend]

some of the fun of a trip is the anticipation...so while my first reaction was GO NOW, I could understand why it would be best for your mom to wait a few weeks.

Praying God directs your steps and that will give you peace in every moment of this illness.

hugs and prayers for your family

 

[crisi]

I've used this company which is out of Moss Landing (north of Montery, South of Santa Cruz)
http://sanctuarycruises.com/whalewatching.html

They are really very good because if they can find whales they will find whales. We went in April and saw Orcas and Humpbacks.

 

[englishteacha]

OP, I hope you can make this work. It will mean so much to you as a family. In 2002, my mother-in-law decided she was going to England. She sold a ton of stuff and went. When she came home, she wasn't feeling all that well, and when Dh took her to the doctor she was diagnosed with lung cancer. She was with us 6 more weeks. She never told us she was sick, but looking back, I think she knew and was trying to protect us. I'm so glad she got the chance to go to the UK, something she had wanted to do since childhood.

 

[Tiana]

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[Princess April]

God Bless you and your family, especially that wonderful mother of yours! . My grandmother (my mommy, she and my grandfather raised me) passed away from breast cancer about 6 years ago.... about 4 years before that my aunt (her daughter) passed away from colon cancer. My birth mother (my grandmother's other daughter) has been diagnosed w/ breast cancer and is in treatment now.
This is the EXACT reason that we take a lovely vacation every year and we bring grandpa (Poppi as dd calls him). This year we are doing a cruise (Disney) to the Bahamas and a week at Disney. He is 82, suffering from prostate cancer, has a catheter and other assorted ailments lmao but this does not stop us! Sure, we may have to spend a little time in the hospital (this last time was because his kidneys were shutting down! , thus the need for the catheter) but, he is strong and loves us.... after a bit of rest (like skipping the park one day) he's ready to go, especially if it involves food or his great grand daughter! .
Seize the day! God Bless, just like that country song says, "Live like you were dying".

 

[momof4crazykiddos]

God bless you and your family! I pray you can take this trip for the memories it entails. I felt like I had to respond because your story sounds so much like my own. My mom was diagnosed with stage 4 breast cancer a few years back that had metastisized to her bones as well as her liver. She did radiation and chemo. She lived almost exactly a year to the day of her diagnosis. Everyone is different tho so I pray your Mom has many days ahead! I just wanted to let you know that my Mom felt awesome but once she started going down hill it was sooo fast. Our trip was to the beach! Good luck in your journey it sounds like your Mom is an amazing person and truly has faith. Thats awesome!

Barbara

 

[momtoce&j]

Just putting in my two cents....Don't wait. Go as soon as you can.

My DH was diagnosed with Grade IV Glioblastoma Multiforme January of 2009. He's only 46 right now and was healthy last year. He went through radiation and chemo, always with a positive attitude and never really got sick from treatments. Well, the bottom fell out on us this fall. His tumor grew back, he went in for a 2nd brain surgery, never recuperated from it and now is home with hospice. The cancer spread to other areas of his brain as well as his cerebrospinal fluid and is all over his brain and spine.

Moral of my story - don't wait. If she's feeling good now, go. Her health could change in a week's time. I know. We never made it to Disney again (we had hoped to go last summer/fall) and now, when I take my kids (hopefully this summer), it will be without him.

 

[a1tinkfans]

OP!

so sorry you all are dealing with cancer! Its just an awful disease. Your mom sounds like an amazing woman and she must be so happy to have such a warm loving supportive family surrounding her.

As a cancer survivor myself, treatments can really wipe you out both physically and yes emotionally, your immune system gets compromised so, perhaps consider a move up of your trip???
I wish you all wonderful loving times together as you navigate thru this. You are in my thoughts and prayers. Get that video out and save these precious times together, Consider having her read some favorite kids books (if there are young kids) later on, down the road, it will be a blessing to hear her reading to the kids. Its one of the things I wish I had done before my own mom passed. I can no longer "hear" her in my head and it really hurts! For the longest time, I swore I could hear her laugh, her laugh was infectious.......

Hugs to your mom, pls let her know we are all thinking and praying for her!!!

 

[disneybound31]

Your family sounds like a wonderful, warm and responsible family. You sound alot like us. We have been frugal penny pinchers for generations in my family. Most anything we spend $ on has to do with experiences and being together. Making memories.

On the anniversary of 9/11 in 2004 my family discussed renting a pontoon boat and remembering the days importance together on the lake and it was something we had never done-gone boating . It was a small fortune to get one big enough for myparents, my little family of 4, Dsis and her husband and my 25 year old brother. We almost didn't do it because of the cost. Then we said the heck with it and went. It was a wonderful day. It was also the last day most of us spent time with my brother because he was killed in the line of duty 5 days later.

Not a one of us has ever said we wished we had our share of that $500 back- but we all CHERISH the picture of my brave, beautiful brother driving that boat.

You can do this. Sending prayers and peace to you.

 

[Dizfan4life]

She's UNBELIEVABLE!!!! Like I said before, her motto is Philippians 4:6 "Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God." And she doesn't worry! She always says, "I know where I'm going when I die, my prayer is that you'll be in Heaven with me." She's pretty inspiring

I LOVE LOVE LOVE this verse also. I am a GEMS counselor and this is our verse of the year!

 

[kkwis2]

I'm sorry I have nothing to add other than my prayers for your mom, your family and you. It sounds like you and your mom have amazing faith. I know that will carry you through anything that comes your way. Good luck in making your decisions on a trip. Enjoy every waking moment!

 

[afeld111781]

First off prayers to your mom and all of you! God is truly faithful and I believe that he longs for us to have the desires of our hearts as the Bible says...so hold onto His Word as it sounds like you are doing...while I dont have anything else to add as I know nothing about whale watching I am still truly touched by this thread...To have a place where so many people have taken the time to send prayers, look up some info, or just a thought to someone they dont even know, really blesses me. I really do love these boards..not only were they a great help to me when planning our first DW trip they are great in everyday life. Thank you to everyone for your kindness...its truly touching.

 

[snowbunny]

Good luck to your mom and your family OP. I hope she gets to see the whales. My son and I have a dream that after our deaths we will find each other again in the ocean, as whales.