Bring your own meat cookout party? Tacky?

[Ciao Mickey]

Hello! I was thinking about throwing a last-day-school open house type party, inviting about 60 kids and adults. We would have beer & other beverages and munchies, but ask people to bring their own food to grill if they will be here at dinner time. Is this tacky? How would you work the invite?
Thanks in advance for any opinions/advice/tips!

Yes it's tacky. If you can't afford to feed people then don't invite them over for a party.

Or scale it down to a number that you can afford to feed.

 

[Ciao Mickey]

Usually, I would just sit back and bit my tongue, but this time I'm going to stick my neck out and actually state my opinion on this one.

People (and I'm not talking about anyone specific here) seem to have such a horrible sense of entitlement nowadays. I can't believe people would actually not go and be with their friends if they were asked to bring meat. Why can't we just all view this for what it is? A chance to have fun with friends. Just because someone wants to get together with their friends, they shouldn't be expected to have to pay for it. I think potlucks are fun. I just upset by people's attitudes about these things. Get over it, have fun, ENJOY each other!

OP, do what feels right for you! I would definetely come, and I would NOT talk about you behind your back. Now THAT would be TACKY!

If I invited someone over to my house for a get-together or dinner I would never expect them to bring their own food. Why not just invite someone over after dinner, for a cup of coffee, if you can't afford to feed extra people?

Maybe it's a "regional" thing expecting guests to their own food to eat.

 

[zumbergc]

We have one single friend who tends to host most of the holiday events at his house.

He has the planning down pretty good.
He uses e-vites. Keeps track of who is, who isn't, and the maybe's.

He even has a drop box that says what type of side dish you are bringing.
Veggie, dessert, chips, etc.
He mostly provides the meat, has some liquor, buns, condiments, ice, etc.
But people bring more liquor, and some of the better cooks bring an alternate dish w/ meat.


Evites, Works out pretty good because a couple of times there were tons of desserts and not enough other food before he had the drop box.

Nothing worse than showing up a little late, and then no food is left, and you brought your side dish, and all the meat is gone, and a million yummy desserts.


Our other friends. They tend to provide the meat, and we do potlucks so everyone else brings a side dish. Although you kind of have to coordinate a little because one year, the guy was like bring beer, and he was telling everyone to bring beer, and wasn't telling people to bring side dishes so people could actually have food w. the beer.

 

[TenThousandVolts]

OP, do what feels right for you! I would definetely come, and I would NOT talk about you behind your back. Now THAT would be TACKY!

Well said

 

[MsAmerica]

I think it is tacky also. I also can't imagine if it is a hot summer day how 60 people are going to keep their meat from spoiling and how 60 people are going to get it cooked, sounds terrible to me.

Also, I think you are better off with BYOB than BYOM, go to costco or any similar warehouse store and get burgers and dogs with rolls. Ask people to bring either a side or dessert and their own liquor. You can supply the soft drinks.

JMO,

MsA

 

[Tinkerbelle32]

Tacky!!!!

 

[Kristi1357]

OP, do what feels right for you! I would definetely come, and I would NOT talk about you behind your back. Now THAT would be TACKY!

Exactly!

 

[SylviaL]

My neighbors just had their annual All Meat--All Day party and it was a blast. I guess it started as a guy thing where the guys grilled meat and that's it. Then, the wives got involved and they started preparing side dishes and desserts. Now, it's a huge party with 4 grills--beef, pork, chicken, and seafood. Everyone is expected to bring meat to share (not a ton, meat is cut into small pieces so everyone can try it). Only the men are allowed to grill, still. This year, we brought Galbi--Korean marinated short ribs which, we were told, won the contest for best meat!

So, I guess, don't call it, bring your own meat, but maybe bring a meat to share.

 

[kwnancy]

We've done these parties (we have a pool) and we don't any more. Last party we did the bring own to grill -- our family had chick breasts another family (mom, dad and three teens) brought one small pkg of chick wings. As I'm sure you can guess what happened..... teens ate very well, luckily I had a few extra breasts in the freezer I could micro-thaw and throw on the grill. After that experience, we supply a meat for the grill and everyone brings a side dish.

It's always BYOB - we supply tea or lemonade and water.

 

[KCMiller]

I think it's a great idea to have an end of year party! I also think that it would be nice if you perhaps included hot dogs, and maybe said something like:

"We're having an end of year party! We'll supply hot dogs and buns, and drinks - please bring a side, and if you'd like to bring something else to grill, we'll have the grill hot for ya! Let me know what side you're going to bring - wouldn't want 30 bowls of potato salad !! Oh, and it's BYOB, but we'll have sodas and lemonade for everyone"

That way, if someone just is OK with hot dogs, they can enjoy what you offer - if you don't buy beer for the whole crowd, the hot dogs and buns won't break the bank - and in our crowd, BYOB is standard at all parties.

Either way, it's a nice idea!

KC

 

[kinntj]

Yes, I think it's tacky. I wouldn't do that to friends or family when I invited them in the first place. It doesn't happen with the neighbors, friends, or family we hang with.

Our friends and family usually bring sides to share and their own drinks if they want something special that we don't provide.

 

[FoundMyPrince]

Yes, it is tacky. Save your beer money and buy some burgers and brats.

 

[BMNABrinx]

We were invited to dinner one night and after accepting the invitation were told to bring our own meat and a side dish. We thought it was tacky. We could've cooked our own meal at home and just went over after dinner to socialize.

To each his own though. It's your party and if you want to do it that way, have fun with it. I think you've gotten some great suggestions so far.

 

[eh24fan]

I don't find it tacky at all. I think it's interesting to be honest. In my family, it's just expected that when there is a cookout, each family brings a dish. It's a chance for family and friends to get together and eat and enjoy eah other's dishes. It's not a fun party if the hosts are worrying about everything on their own.

 

[MouseLover]

If it is with close friends, that is. I would never do that for someone I don't know well.
Most of the people we get together with are family or very close friends, people we've taken vacations with & just hang out with.
We have all done this in the past.

We just say, hey, let's all buy a couple of pounds of crab legs & get together at my house for a crab boil. We usually provide fish, shrimp, & side dishes, and everyone chips in on the crab legs. It turns into a big fish fry.

My brother & his buddies have a big July 4th bbq every year. Bring your own ribs/steaks/side dishes, whatever.

Personally, I would feel uncomfortable if someone cooked a really expensive dinner, like filet mignon or seafood, and wouldn't let me contribute.

I, too, think it might be a regional thing. Here in the south, potlucks are probably more common than dinner parties.

 

[ICF]

I think it's tacky. If I had to bring my own meat and dogs and stuff, why don't I just stay home and grill at my own house.

....because the party and other people aren't at your house. The "fun" is the interaction of being with out people and being social.

I don't see anything wrong with this type of party, especially if it's a neighborhood / sports team type of thing.

 

[Green Tea]

As to pot lucks in general, not the meat question: Is anyone else tired of being invited to a party and expected to bring food? I feel like the manners lady from the local paper, but I'm not crazy about that. (except for something like an after church luncheon where the church shouldn't use their money to pay for everyone's meal) I like to host a party and provide everything so I can entertain my guests. That isn't the norm, but I wish it was. I'd rather spend the day cooking and have everyone to my home than cook everyday for something to send to someone else's.

 

[eliza61]

Hello! I was thinking about throwing a last-day-school open house type party, inviting about 60 kids and adults. We would have beer & other beverages and munchies, but ask people to bring their own food to grill if they will be here at dinner time. Is this tacky? How would you work the invite?
Thanks in advance for any opinions/advice/tips!

My vote. Tacky. Sort of like inviting me over for dinner and then telling me to bring dinner!

 

[Kay1]

When my husband and I were first married his step-relative invited us to a combination house warming/birthday party. We were told to bring our own food and bring our own bottle. Then she included the colors of her kitchen and bathrooms! We didn't even consider going. Just a little story and nothing at all what the OP was suggesting, of course.

 

[mtblujeans]

...So, I guess, don't call it, bring your own meat, but maybe bring a meat to share.

And, there is what to put on the invitations....!