Behavior Challenge Thread

[DisDreaminMom]

Hi to all the newbies. Unfortunately, when you all start talking about stuff with letters instead of names, I am totally out of the loop. Fortunately, we have no medical issues other than asthma and chronic annoyingness, so I am thankful and not able to offer a valid opinion on how to tackle a problem. Plus, I never got "high tech" in dealing with my DS, so OT and Speech are as far as I go. I will admit that for a few weeks I thought the teachers were talking about putting my son in Over Time. No joke. That was a few years ago, so I'm a little less clueless, but not much.

I have to say to Mechurchaldy. Hey, 16 pounds is great! What a super thing you've done! Way to go!!!! I am not normally a pusher of weight loss, but I think we can all agree that this is a healthy thing and might go a long way to helping you feel more comfortable and mobile.

I've been trying to forgo sodas and fried foods. Those are my downfalls. We'll see.

I was a bad "pony mom" and forgot to buy feed for my fat little pony on Thursday night. He stays in a stall all day so he doesn't eat too much Spring grass since he has the horse form of diabetes. (We're all what they call "Easy Keepers" around here!) Anyway, I didn't feed him his handful of feed Thursday night- I just turned him out in his field. Then I stopped at the feed store Friday morning and by the time I got to the barn, he was already brought up in his stall. He was very angry at me, even though he had hay. He just likes his feed- he's very food oriented, bless his heart. Anyway, I fed him and stopped in the "tack room" to get something (it's where we all store our equipment, a.k.a "tack"). On top of my tack trunk was a partially eaten Domino's Pizza. I left a note for the barn manager that said, "I know Lincoln didn't get dinner, and his breakfast was late, but how on Earth did he make someone order him a pizza?"

It looks like we all have lot's of TR's to read and create during the first few painful weeks of Summer. Something to look forward to when the kids begin the whole "I'm bored" shtick.

Shall we have a voluntary Dole Whip dare contest? Let's see how many we can eat collectively this summer. That'd be a totally indulgent, frivolous thing to do. I'm IN!!!!

 

[C&G'sMama]

Shall we have a voluntary Dole Whip dare contest? Let's see how many we can eat collectively this summer. That'd be a totally indulgent, frivolous thing to do. I'm IN!!!!

That is so good of you to "take one for the team" by eating Dole Whips.

Here's a Dole Whip Float to get started

 

[pudge the fish]

we are going to visit the Poly next weeknd as we are meeting friends there for dinner
I am GETTING A DOLE WHIP
or I will have a temper tantrum that will rival any of our kids

I need to finish my day trip report
dining at crystal palace w/ food allergies
and the *DOLE WHIP INCIDENT* and reasons # 2 & 3 why I didn't get one

school is out in 2 weeks and I am so crazed with all this last minute stuff

YAY! 16 pounds WAY TO GO

to everyone else

 

[mechurchlady]

we are going to visit the Poly next weeknd as we are meeting friends there for dinner
I am GETTING A DOLE WHIP
or I will have a temper tantrum that will rival any of our kids

I need to finish my day trip report
dining at crystal palace w/ food allergies
and the *DOLE WHIP INCIDENT* and reasons # 2 & 3 why I didn't get one

school is out in 2 weeks and I am so crazed with all this last minute stuff

YAY! 16 pounds WAY TO GO

to everyone else

The apple does not fall far from the tree.
Wow what a sour little apple you are.
I promise you will get your dole whip next time even if i have to go to DLR and get one then fly out to florida holding a dole whip in my hands.

Big hgus and I am all for Dole Whip eating but I have a budget and a diet. I love dole whips for the low calories and yet sweetness.

Hugs to all but Pudge.
Gives Pudge a dole whip instead then a hug.

Laurie

 

[DisDreaminMom]

Well, I told you so. And I sure did. Got the call tonight that Aunt and Uncle will not be going to the pre-Coco Beach Disney leg of the trip, and possibly not at all. Why, you ask? Cause the sick cat most likely has to be put to sleep on Tuesday (???Why not today or tomorrow? IDK, I just DK!!!))) SO in anticipation of the (un)timely demise of the cat, they are pre-canceling the trip due to uncontrollable sadness.

I just have one thing to say, and I'm going to say it now so no one I know can hear: If these lovely relatives of mine had to live a day in the life of any of us, they would crumble to the ground in a little puddle of mush and never get up again.

There; I said it. I'm done. I really do love them, but I said my Uncle can be a little "on the spectrum" and this is what I mean.

So we'll have fun, just my DS and DD, but I would just feel a little safer with another adult if need be or maybe I'm sad because I really wanted to be with my Aunt. I know she'd have a great time. Stupid cat. And I gave said cat to her six years ago. He was just a barn kitten at the time and another one of their cats died, so I gave them that one. When I start thinking about it, I guess it's a little sad. They took in two feral kittens recently, and I highly suspect the two wild kittens brought in a nasty cat disease. I warned them about being around stray cats and then touching the house cats. And now this poor cat is dying of some mysterious viral disease.

OK, I'm done. I'll feel better soon. I promise.

 

[mechurchlady]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YpJsinIr_8Q
Something special for everyone.

It is sad that your tirp was changed but remember that pets give love unconditional and it is hard to loose a pet. it is hard to give up on a pet who never questioned your faith, etiquette, language, morals, or political beliefs. A pet is there when life stinks and when you are dancing on air with glee.

Chin up and I hope you can have fun this trip.

hugs
Laurie

 

[C&G'sMama]

Hello All,

Today I am finding the kitchen counter and DP is folding piles upon piles of laundry. DS is watching the race, Tony Stewart is his favorite driver. We have 2 weeks of lego playgroup left. I talked to one of the moms last time and turned out this group, UNYFEAT - Upstate New York Families for Effective Autism Treatment - grew out of 4 or 5 moms getting together 5 years ago. She was telling me they have 400 families in our area now that are members. It's pretty amazing. It's been real nice for DS and I. He and another boy have connected, as well as our kids connect.

With any group of kids there are a couple of issues. One is an older boy whose father leaves during the play group. This boy is rather aggressive and my son and his buddy have both told me they are afraid of him. It's not the kid's fault. I want to tell dad to get off his duff and hang out with his kid. The other night dad did watch the post play group movie (it was too wet for the paly groun) with his son and the child was very calm.

The other issue is mine. Okay, I'm socially inept (really). One child is 5 and does not socialize. He screams when the other kids come near him. Mom and dad are both there and are wonderful. I don't want to exclude him but at the same time I don't want to interfere. I feel like an idiot because I don't know which way to look half the time.

So 18 full days and 2 1/2 days of school left. The kids are ready, so are we. G will be going to Y day camp one week, chess camp 1 week, 6 weeks 1 hour per week of writing and 8 nights of speech, social skills at this point. DD will do a week of arts camp, a week of Adventure Camp at their Gymanstic place and we also put her in a writing skills program. It's pure letter formation. We feel she lost a lot in 1st grade when they had 3 teachers and no consistency. We realize she has problems with her writing. As a family we will spend a week in a cabin with 2 other families (each family has there own cabin) at a local state park. And before we know it summer will be done. Our kids don't back to school until September 9th this year.

Ann

 

[bookwormde]

C&G’sMama,

We are in the “unburying” mode also (the boy’s playroom), we have finally decided to give away a lot of the older good stuff and send more to the landfill.

Your group sounds great! Our local Autism society is starting on of the new Lego/integrated social skills groups so I hoping it will be a success, since this has been the indication from some of the prototyping groups (these are a lot more “structured” than the typical Lego group).

I do not know if you local group works with any outside groups, but if they do I would love it if you could PM me their contact info, so I could learn from their experience and programs to get ideas for the group I am setting up.

bookwormde

 

[PrincessMom4]

Have not been on this thread for a while. We have a diagnosis now for my daughter. Its called Sensory Processing Disorder. Apparently it mocks symptoms of ODD and ADHD and autistim. That's part of the reason we were seeing some signs of Autistim, but she was not rated high enough on any of the scales. Also the meds should have helped a little.

 

[bookwormde]

Princessmom4,

Glad you have a diagnosis you can “work with”. Yes the anxiety that SPD causes often creates co morbid manifestations, which can be mistaken for ADHD and ODD. SPD is a central “piece” of the autism spectrum, but also exists when none of the other spectrum characteristics are present. One good thing is once you get the SPD “under control” you have the knowledge to see if there is anything else “going on”.

Actually if it is only SPD and the “detective work” is successful and accommodations and adaptations are in place anxiety drops precipitously and often medications quickly become unnecessary.

Congratulations and once you daughter understands her “differences” and knows that people will accept and accommodate for them she will be able to “relax”. Way to go mom!!!.

Don’t forget there are also sometimes “gifts” that come along with these differentials so be prepared to “celebrate” those also.

bookwormde

 

[mechurchlady]

Have not been on this thread for a while. We have a diagnosis now for my daughter. Its called Sensory Processing Disorder. Apparently it mocks symptoms of ODD and ADHD and autistim. That's part of the reason we were seeing some signs of Autistim, but she was not rated high enough on any of the scales. Also the meds should have helped a little.

I and my mother both have SID/SPD and I can tell you that mom is very ADD and ODD at times while other times child like and almost autistic. I am lucky that I do not have it as bad as she does.

I now see things that were signs but which were mistaken for stubborness, family quirks, and even racial. My dad said everyone in my mother's family seems to stand with arms across their chest even my Mexican Grandmother. We are the fiery hot blooded Latinas so that explains the temper tantrums, fighting, and other problems. Dad had false teeth and was very southern drawl for a Hoosier while mom and her mom spoke fast so that is why I speak funny. I adapt but those were the answers.

Neurovariancies and neurovariants do not fit in neat little packages like ingrown hairs, cancer or sunburn. I feel I have 3% anxiety, 5% of phobias, .05% of OCD, etc. and not just one little neat label. Saveaquarter's husband has SID/SPD also. We have been told on disboards that SID/SPD does not exist but it does and if you ever had to deal with someone who is hypersensitive then you would know that it is real. It has its good points and its bad points but most of the time with good loving support and therapy/training one can lead a nearly normal life.

It is hard to get people to understand that a person with a neurovariancy does not always want to live their life like that. I am the pack rat like grandmother and her daughter (my aunt) as well as my father's brother. I do not need all them cookbooks but cannot get rid of them. I would love a clutter free life but do not relish and enjoy being cluttered or unkempt or a loud talker. I want to change but what hurts is the people who are stumbling blocks. You can harp on a smoker all day but he will quit when he is ready to quit and in the mean time the harping hurts them emotionally.

Hugs to everyone and hey Bok Choy Momma love the report on camp, keep up the good work.

Laurie

 

[saveaquarter]

Hey guys, I haven't been around for a while because we've been dealing with quite a bit in regards to my husband's illness. He has lupus (as some of you know, I think), which, unfortunately, is not a disease that can be tested for, it's confirmed by ruling other diseases out. Most of them have been, some of those more than once, but we've been through a slew of incompetent doctors looking for good ones, and the most recent (who is a very good one) wants to have J evaluated for multiple sclerosis. It's one of the most common things misdiagnosed as lupus and vice versa.

The prognosis is about the same, there are a few more treatment options, and its not (as J calls it) father's uncle's wife's syndrome; as in everyone knows someone with it who lives perfectly fine- so the severity of it will no longer need to be explained. We're very worried about it, though. We've spent so long being confident that he has lupus, and he's been through so many tests, that having things changed like this on us, if it is MS, would be a pretty severe blow.

He's going in tomorrow evening to start the process, and has an MRI later this week. The episode of House that is our life continues on. Wish us luck, everyone.

 

[C&G'sMama]

Hey guys, I haven't been around for a while because we've been dealing with quite a bit in regards to my husband's illness.

I'm praying for you here. And that your twins decide to make an appearance soon.

 

[mechurchlady]

It is ice to have a person to talk to and thanks for being there on Pogo. REad your mail there. I hope you have the babies soon. J has gone through so much and does not need this, he is such a sweet guy and really does not need all of the health problems. Any word when the cast comes off?

hugs
Laurie

 

[DisDreaminMom]

Hey, all. We are well and getting ready for the last day of school. I am ready for it to be DONE! DS got sent to the Principal's office Thursday. DH told him if he got in trouble again he was going to spank him. i was not happy, but held my tongue. Interestingly enough, DS went to school and had no tickets on Friday. So I guess his fear of a spanking worked. He hasn't been spanked since he was about 4 (and he remembered it in detail, too, which i thought was pretty funny, since he can't remember what he ate for lunch most days...)

So we are leaving two days before school is really out. A friend is writing a Dr.'s note for us. I don't have guilt. I promise. We'll have fun. If I can get my computer to cooperate, I'll update you guys from down there.

Saveaquarter, no lectures, only best wishes and kindness. Hope all is well.

You guys take care,

 

[BeckyScott]

It's wierd what things kids stick in their memories.

Oldest DS doesn't remember anything. Long term, short term, he forgets stuff all the time.

However, and he's 11, the one thing he will tell you about his entire childhood was when he was in preschool, age 4. The preschool was in a small neighboring town, and one afternoon there was a tornado.

(I'm in Missouri, a tornado comes with the territory, if you KWIM)

The sirens went off about 10 minutes before preschool was about to get out, and the kids had been outside doing recess before then. They took everyone to the safe room. I had been en route, so I ended up in the safe room too, along with youngest DS. The tornado didn't hit us or anything, but it was a pretty severe storm. I did get caught in the storm trying to get over to the preschool and it scared me pretty bad too, very windy, branches falling, rain coming horizontal, I was in a mini-van, to put it frankly I was scared poop-less.

Anyway, that's the only thing he can remember from more than about a year ago.

 

[DisDreaminMom]

Tornado + minivan = I'd remember that, too. I remember the tornado of '75 where half the town I was in got leveled. I remember standing on the back porch as the sky turned yellow and trying to find where the giant TOMATO was going to roll in from. I swear, I told you all I'm slow on the uptake.

So DS gets in the car today after school with a wrapped present in his hands. He has a GIANT smile on his face. He says, "Look what I won!" and my DD said it was a Reading Prize. Then the Principal walked over and said DS won the Primary Level reading prize. The only one awarded for kids in 1-3rd grade.. It is for excellence in reading. So I guess they were impressed when DS kept bringing in his 8th grade level Orchestra book and drawing detailed pictures of the entire orchestra (with the instruments spelled correctly, by the way.) I'm so proud of my little bugger. He has gone from not being able to write his own last name and barely reading phonetically at the beginning of the year, to reading seriously hard stuff.

If this is Aspergers, count me in! (Oh, and we are now moving into Ancient Egypt as a focus. This should be fun. We already had the discussion about how you can pick brains out a person's nose-not that I'd recommend it. We wore our Eiffel Tower out playing with it too much, so we are planning an upgrade at Epcot. And Cornet lessons start when we get back from Disney. Whew!)

Oh, and DD got all A's the entire year and so I'm super proud of her, too. I now feel not ONE shred of guilt for taking my kids on a two week vacay.

I know, it's a long way to college and real life, but I'll take it. Everything is packed except the truck. How many Dole whips do I dare eat????

 

[bookwormde]

It is always nice to end the school year on a good note, congratulation to you and the kids.

I know most think it a little “crazy” when I say that I would have been very disappointed if I had not had at least one child who was an aspie, you are just are seeing some of the intellectual gifts that are so amazing to watch, although I find the “nature” of our children (kind, honest, nondiscriminatory etc) to be their greatest gift which is so evident when they are not suffering from the anxiety society often creates when they do not understand them.

bookwormde

 

[C&G'sMama]

DDM,

Very cool about the reading award. Absolutely no guilt. Of course I'm the one whose kids missed 16 days of school this past school year to go to Miami in December in and WDW in April. They're fine.

Love the comment about the book on Orchestras. Our school is having a book fair this week and DS wanted "little kid" books. Of course he is a little kid. So DP let him get 2 but then tried to get him to pick out a couple of chapter books. He didn't want them. Then he discovered the reference section. Cue music, it was the Holy Grail. He end up with an encyclopedia of American Presidents and a collection of American Songs (SSB, God Bless America Etc) with a CD.

So, go enjoy your trip. It sounds like you all have worked hard this year. Now it's time to kick back and just enjoy.

 

[DisDreaminMom]

Hey guys. My day got blown up and now I'm decompressing here on the computer. Long story short- At around 8:00 am, I found a really pretty Golden retriever on the side of the road on an Interstate overpass. It was skinny and it's collar had dug into it's neck. It had a big rope tied on it. There was a Huskie with it, but I couldn't catch it. So I called the vet's office and brought the dog in there to check it for a microchip. It was such a sweet dog, but obviously in shock. It was a stinky, filthy matted mess, too. There was a chip in the dog (yay!) but the microchip company wasn't open yet, so I took the dog to the shelter, with the understanding that the vet's office would follow up for me while I was away (I'm leaving this evening). I get to the shelter and walk in the door, and they say, "Oh, we just got that dog in yesterday!". It turns out the dog had already been there in the last 24 hours. Picked up from the exact same place yesterday. Noone can catch the Huskie.

SO now I'm mad that I wasted my time when this idiot owner is just going to let the dog out again or, conversely, it occurs to me that maybe the owner is actually putting the dog on the road so it can catch the Huskie that won't get caught. I now have talked to two other people that I know that live/drive in the area and they have picked this same dog up in recent months. It's not a safe road, by the way (in terms of a safe place with cars driving 55 being safe for any animal).

So now my morning is wasted and I have guilty feelings for taking the dog back to the owners who clearly can't/won't care for this poor dog properly. I should have just taken it and found it a home. Sheesh. The dog acted so relieved when it jumped in my car, too. Poor old dog. Probably thought I was gonna feed him and care for him. And I took him back to hell. I hate doing the right thing when it isn't right.

Now I need Dole whips and a stiff drink...Now off to pack and get my morning made up for.